One Kiss

She sighed deeply as he began to slowly massage her shoulders. His hands were warm against her cool skin and she could feel the tension in her body relax as his strong fingers worked. She watched his face in the mirror as he looked at her with a serious look in his blue eyes and she could see the worry they held. She groaned softly as his fingers moved up to the base of her neck and slowed to a rhythmic pace that gave her such pleasure she never wanted him to stop. She closed her eyes as she felt his soft beard against her shoulder as he bent to kiss her gently on the neck. His lips were soft and warm and his tongue began to trace the top of her shoulder and she shivered at the intimacy of his touch. She leaned back against his bare chest, her body molding into his, as she felt his hands move down her sides and up under her tank top to cup her breasts. The feel of his hands holding her so gently, gave her comfort.

"You took a chance today," he whispered, breaking her mood.

"Let it go, Marty," she told him as she slowly turned to face him, her eyes flashing. Then she kissed him, and he seemed to forget his concerns as he responded to her tongue, as she pressed hard against him. He excited her as his hands caressed her breasts and his fingers slowly massaged her nipples until she could hardly breathe. Her kisses became more urgent and her own hands began to explore his body, roaming seductively over his back and down to the top of his jeans. She slowly slid her hands down until she grasped his butt and pulled him hard to her and she laughed at his surprise.

"What did you have in mind, Miss Blye," he said smiling, as he gave her quick small kisses between the words. He slipped her top up over her head and stood admiring her as his smile grew. His hands moved from her breasts and he unzipped her jeans and let them slip from her hips to the floor as he stared, transfixed by her sensual body.

"Why don't you surprise me, Mr. Deeks," she said as she unbuttoned his jeans. Before she could pull them down, he picked her up in his arms and kissed her as he carried her to the couch. He laid her down as his kiss lingered. Then he stood and looked down at her, his eyes roving over her body, taking in each curve and nuance and she could see the admiration and the desire in his eyes. He knelt down next to her and softly kissed each breast slowly and lovingly, his tongue teasing the tip of each nipple, as her back arched in response and her eyes grew dark and bewitching. His hand moved slowly beneath her panties, finding just the right rhythm as he caressed her until she gasped as the deftness of his touch brought her almost to a climax. She wanted him badly now and she put her hands in his wild golden hair and pulled his mouth towards hers. Their kisses became urgent with desire.

He slipped out of his jeans and slowly lowered himself down, covering her body with his own. She stared into his dusty blue eyes, now deep with longing and she lost herself there. Then she felt him hesitate, and she gave him a questioning look.

"What's wrong?" she asked softly, her voice husky and low, and her eyes searching his face for an answer.

"Kensi, I want you more than anything in the world right now," he said, taking her face in his hands and then kissing her softly. "But I think if we do this, it will be dangerous for us."

"Why?" she asked him as she slowly stroked his arms, causing him to tremble and close his eyes briefly.

"Stop doing that," he said with a crooked grin, "or I'll forget what I was going to say."

She smiled back at him with a wicked look in her eyes, and he finally had to hold her arms down to make her stop.

"I'm serious Kensi," he said more firmly, and she saw that resolute look in his eyes again.

"How is making love going to effect our undercover assignment?" she asked, starting to get slightly annoyed.

"Because they'll see something has changed between us," he said and got up and walked to the window.

She sat up on the couch and sat admiring his gorgeous ass, so close to perfection, she couldn't believe she wasn't going to get some of it tonight.

"Damn you, Marty Deeks," she swore. "How are they going to know that?"

"Because they'll see it on my face." he turned back toward her and she knew he was right.

"Then you better put your pants back on, or I won't be responsible for my actions." she said as she sighed regretfully and got up, picking up her clothes as she went into the bathroom and shut the door.

"Don't be in there too long," he said loudly, "I'm going to need a cold shower."

He could hear her laugh, but she couldn't see the disappointed look on his face as he collected his clothes and headed for the bedroom.

He was angry with himself for becoming intimate with her tonight, especially after today. She had scared him and they should have been discussing her actions instead of getting physically involved. Callen had warned him about it before this operation, but he didn't think it would be a problem. They had been partners for over a year, and something more personal for less than half that time and they had always been able to keep their personal relationship separate from their working partnership. But being together every day and night on this assignment for almost three weeks had changed the dynamic between them. They were supposed to be in the business of arms dealing, not lovers, but boss and bodyguard. And he knew he wouldn't be able to control how he looked at her if they made love during this assignment.

"Okay, Mr. Deeks, your turn in the bathroom," she said with a pouty look on her face. She was trying to keep it lighthearted, but then she saw the look on his face and she knew what she had done today was really bothering him.

"You shouldn't have kissed him, Kens," Deeks said softly. "He was already attracted to you, and now he's thinks he can have you."

"Are you jealous?" she said seriously, wondering if that was what this was all about.

"Kensi, he's a dangerous man," he replied, becoming exasperated with her. "You can't play with a man like that, he will become possessive and that will complicate things for both of us."

"You didn't answer my question." she said her eyes growing darker. She needed to know.

"Of course I'm jealous, but that's not what this is about." He came up and put his hands on her arms, pulling her closer to him and trying to make her understand. "He would hurt you, if he thought you were playing him, Kens."

She nodded that she understood and then he wrapped his arms around her and held her close until he felt her relax. Then he kissed her goodnight and left to go back to his own room.

Deeks called Callen after his shower to bring him up to date on what the arms dealer, Marco Dante, had talked about that day. Then he told him what Kensi had done and he could hear the sharp intake of breath as Callen realized how it might effect the operation.

"What was she thinking, Deeks?" he asked, bewildered by her action.

"I don't know, but be ready if things go bad." Deeks told him. "He's an arrogant son-of-a-bitch,

Callen, and if he decides he wants her, he'll take her, and I won't let him do that."

"Stay calm, Deeks," Callen warned him, "Kensi can handle him. Don't over react if he makes a move. We need to get the men responsible for supplying military weapons to some of the worst terrorists in the world, and this is the closest anybody has gotten to finding out their identities."

"Yeah, you're right," Deeks said and tried to calm his active imagination about what Kensi had gotten them into.

...

The next day, Kensi returned to playing the part of an arms buyer for a South American drug cartel. Her alias was Sonja Marquella, and her bodyguard, Ry Cooper, always accompanied her. Today, he wasn't going to let her out of his sight. He became instantly alert as Marco Dante came into the solarium where they were having a late breakfast. He immediately headed for their table, bending down to kiss Sonja on both cheeks.

"I hope you had pleasant dreams last night," he said smiling.

"Very lovely dreams, in fact," Sonja replied in her slightly accented, sensuous voice. Then she looked over at Ry and smiled.

Ry Cooper noticed the chill in the air and looked back at Dante, whose face had taken on a darker look than when he had come in. The man stood and swept his hand through his dark grey hair. He held his hand out to Sonja, who looked surprised, but took it and he pulled her to her feet. Then he kissed her, letting his hands roam over her breasts and come to rest on her hips. Sonja tried to back away, but he pulled her closer, kissing her more insistently. She put her hands on his shoulders and pushed him off, but he just laughed. Ry grabbed his arm and swung him away from her.

"She's not interested, man," Ry Cooper told him coldly as he shoved him back.

Dante stood shaking with anger.

"Don't ever put your hands on me again," he said to Ry. Then he turned to Sonja and reached out and caressed her cheek. "We aren't finished, my beautiful Sonja. I am going to enjoy our time together in the coming days." Then he turned and walked away.

She let out a deep sigh and looked to see the anger slowly fading from Deeks' face. He shook his head and they both knew they were in trouble.

"I'm going back to my room. I need to talk to Callen," he said as he turned to leave.

"I'm sorry," he heard her say softly as he walked out of the room.

As he unlocked his door, he was rushed by four of Dante's men, who pushed him rapidly through the front room and into his bedroom. They shoved him down spread-eagle across the bed, forcing his face into the coverlet, making it hard for him to breathe. He struggled against them, but two of them held his arms down while the others forced his legs apart. Then he heard Dante's voice.

"Who do you think you are to touch me?" he said, venom magnifying his deep voice. "Sonja is mine now. I claim her. Do you understand?"

Then he straddled Deeks' back, putting his knee at the base of his spine and letting his full body weight force the air out of his lungs and cracking two of his lower ribs. Marty screamed into the bed. Then Dante viciously punched him hard in the kidneys several times before getting off his back and standing behind him. The two men holding his legs forced them further apart and pulled his body to the edge of the bed.

"Now, I will make you understand that a woman like that is not meant for the likes of a pathetic shit like you." Dante said softly.

Then he slammed his knee brutally up between Deeks' legs and into his crotch. Pain exploded through his body and he gasped as bright flashes cut through his blackening vision. Dante laughed as he repeated the vicious attack. Deeks slowly slid unconscious to the floor. Dante turned and walked out of the room, wiping his hands with a white silk handkerchief.

He returned to the solarium and calmly sat down next to Sonja.

"Are you having an affair with your bodyguard?" he asked, taking her hand.

"Don't be ridiculous," she laughed, but was instantly on alert. Why would he think that, she wondered? But then she remembered her comment about the lovely dreams and how she had looked at Deeks.

"Well, if you are, I don't think he will be in any shape to satisfy you for some time." Dante smiled sweetly at her.

"What are you talking about?" she asked, pulling her hand free and rising from her chair.

"We had a little conversation and I made it a point to let him know you are mine now," he told her, "and to make him aware of the consequences if he should ever touch me or you again."

"What did you do to him?" she shouted as anger flashed in her eyes. She tried to go by him to check on Deeks, but he grabbed her arm and pulled her tight to him.

"He is a boy, compared to me, Sonja," Dante whispered in her ear.

She slapped him hard across the mouth, surprising him and causing anger to flash across his face.

"You idiot, I'm not having an affair with Ry," she said harshly into his face. "He's gay."

She ran out of the room, leaving a stunned Marco Dante standing in the middle of the room.

...

Her heart was pounding as she opened the door to his room. When she didn't see him, she called his name. Then she heard a groan from the bedroom, and found him on the floor in a fetal position, retching into the carpet.

"Deeks, oh, God, what did he do to you?" she was close to tears as she saw the pain he was in. She quickly brought a cold towel and held it to his forehead.

"Wrong end, Kensi," he barely whispered and then threw up again.

She immediately called Callen, who told her to expect Sam to show up as a doctor. And twenty minutes later, he was at the door.

"Dr. Gordon at your service," Sam said in a Jamaican accent, and quickly hurried to see what kind of shape Deeks was in. He was still in a fetal position and semi-conscious and Sam could see he had lost his breakfast. He pulled up Deeks' shirt and saw the deep bruises around his kidneys and as he ran his hand along is back, he felt the cracked ribs. He already knew what else had been done to him from how he was lying on the floor and the vomiting.

"Hi Sam," Deeks mumbled and then groaned as he tried to move. "I think I can sit up now."

"Just stay where you are, Deeks," Sam said calmly as he held him down gently. "Try rolling over on your back, first." He helped him and when Deeks was somewhat comfortable, he held his head up to take a couple of pain pills. Sam propped his head up on a pillow and covered him with a couple of blankets as he began to shiver from shock, then Sam stood and led Kensi out into the living room.

"What the hell happened Kens?" Sam asked trying to cover his anger. "What did Deeks do to get himself beaten like that?"

"I made a mistake, Sam," Kensi said as her eyes glistened with barely contained tears. "I was flirting with Dante, and I kissed him. He took it for more than it was, and now he wants me."

"But why do this to Deeks?" Sam questioned.

"Dante thought I was having an affair with my bodyguard," she answered as she looked at the floor. "He did it as a warning to Ry Cooper to stay away from me."

Sam could tell how upset she was with what she had done and what it had cost Deeks.

"What's to stop him from doing it again?" Sam asked. "Deeks has to stay on as your backup. We can't bring in somebody else at this stage."

"I know, Sam," she said looking at him with a brief smile. "It won't happen again. I told Dante that Ry Cooper is gay."

Sam flashed a huge smile at that and from the bedroom they heard Deeks laugh, followed by a groan. Kensi followed Sam back in to see Deeks and were greeted by a crooked smile.

"I wish we had thought of that earlier," he said and grimaced from the effort to keep from laughing. "Good cover story, Kens, but a little late."

When Deeks was finally able to get into bed, Sam called Callen with an update and then left the two agents with instructions to be careful and a bottle of pain meds for Deeks. Callen had told him that their sources thought the arms deal was close to coming together in the next couple of days.

"Try and stay away from that guy until you absolutely need to deal with him," Sam told her with a little anger in his voice. He knew she was sorry, but she had to be very careful with a guy who would do this. The guy seemed a little unbalanced to Sam, and that was always dangerous. He just hoped Deeks would be able to recover in time if the arms deal happened quickly. Kensi would need him.

After he left, Kensi went to lie down next to Deeks. He was shivering, so she got under the covers with him and hugged him to her. He snuggled into her arms, kissed her and slowly fell asleep. She held him for a long time, going over in her mind, what had made her flirt so much with Marco Dante. She finally concluded she had been trying to make Deeks jealous, but she had no idea why she thought she needed to do that. She slowly stroked his back as he slept in her arms, and she wished she could take back that one kiss.

...

Deeks could barely walk the next day, so Kensi brought him breakfast in bed, which he got quite a kick out of.

"A guy could get used to this," he said, smiling that goofy grin of his. "As long as I don't have to get beaten up first." The smile faded as he tried to move and pain shot through his body. This better be one hell of a breakfast, he thought, to make it worth all this agony.

Kensi saw the pain ripple across his face and her guilt went up a notch. She sat down next to him on the bed and reached out and gently touched his shoulder. He looked solemnly at her as he took another bite of his blueberry muffin. He knew she was feeling terrible about what had happened, but something inside him didn't want to let her off the hook this time. She should have known better than to play around with a guy like Dante, but even he was surprised by the guy's reaction when he had pulled him away from Kensi. Sam thought he was unbalanced, and Deeks was starting to agree with him.

"I'm sorry, Deeks," she said again. "I didn't think."

He put his cup of coffee down and turned towards her. He couldn't bear to see her so sad, even if she was at fault. He smiled softly at her and rubbed his thumb across her cheek, letting it finally come to rest on her lips. She kissed it gently and then touched it with the tip of her tongue and he felt a thrill as she took his thumb in her mouth. He felt his body react and a sharp pain caused him to gasp. She pulled back instantly and he could see the concern on her face as she moved closer to him.

"I think we might have to wait a couple of days before we play around like that," he whispered as he lay back on the pillow and waited for the pain to subside.

"Well, you are supposed to be gay," she smiled wickedly. "So, this will be good practice for your alias."

"How do you know I won't start playing around with one of the cute waiters?" he said, enjoying the light banter that always seemed to be a part of their relationship.

"Now you're just trying to make me jealous," she responded.

"Is that why you kissed Dante, Kens?" he asked, suddenly serious. "To make me jealous?"

Her smile was quickly gone and her eyes flashed dangerously, but he held her gaze until she looked away, and he knew it was the truth. He took her hand, but she jerked it away and got up and walked out of the room.

Kensi felt anger rise in her throat as she left the apartment. She knew she had messed up, that her actions had caused Deeks to be badly beaten, but she couldn't help being angry at his last question, even though it was the truth. She needed to get away, to have her own space, after three weeks undercover together; she had to get away from him.

She spent the day in her room, going over the case, and not answering her phone. After dinner in her room, she walked around the resort in the cool night air and her racing heart finally began to calm. She examined her feelings for Deeks and her need to try and keep him off balance, never wanting him to be totally in control. She knew she had a competitive nature and was afraid of committing herself completely to him out of fear, but why she tried to play with their relationship during an undercover op was a surprise even to her. She shook her head as she walked under the large pergola behind the pool. It was a lovely spot, secluded and private, and she could see the lights of the city far below.

As she inhaled the cool night air she heard footsteps and turned toward them. Marco Dante stepped under the wisteria-covered pergola and smiled at her surprise. His four bodyguards spread out around her. She realized instantly what he was going to do, and she prepared herself for a fight.

"A beautiful spot for our first lovemaking," he said in his accented, old-fashioned way of speaking. He wasn't smiling when he said it, and a cold chill ran down her spine.

"I'm not interested in doing anything with you except an arms deal," she replied.

"One must always mix pleasure with a little business." As he said it, his bodyguards rushed her. She was able to injure one with a kick to the knee, but the other three wrapped her arms and legs and then shoved her violently against one of the stone columns. One of them punched her solidly in the stomach, knocking the air out of her lungs and she slumped to her knees. They jerked her up and pulled her arms up over her head and tied her hands behind the top of one of the columns, stretching her body out against the cold stone. Her feet were tied to the bottom and no matter how hard she struggled, she couldn't break free.

Dante watched her struggle and it excited him. He had her now, just as he had envisioned it. No one would come to rescue her, so he had all the time in the world to enjoy her body and that made him smile. He noticed her eyes flashing in the moonlight. They were one of the reasons he knew he had to have her. There was something animalistic about them that thrilled him. He knew she would fight him, but he liked that in a woman and he laughed deeply in anticipation as he moved towards her.

He hit her hard in the abdomen and she cried out and slumped against the ropes that held her. He stepped closer and released her hair from the clip that held it tight behind her head. It flowed around her shoulders and he smiled at how beautiful and wanton she looked. Her wild eyes flashed as he began to unbutton the front of her dress, but she spit on him, and he slapped her across the mouth, and then tore her dress open. Then he stood back and admired her body, his eyes taking in the soft lace of her black bra and panties. He saw her inhale sharply as he took a knife from his bodyguard, pressing her back against the stone and watching him with a wary look in her eyes.

"I'm not going to cut you," he laughed. "Not this time." Then he slowly slipped the knife blade under her bra strap and sliced through it, doing the other even more slowly and then he brought the knife blade up between her breasts and cut her free of the dark lace. As the bra fell away, she seemed to shrink back from him, and he saw fear in those wild eyes and he liked that. He stepped back and took off his jacket and tie and slowly rolled up the sleeves of his crisp white shirt.

"You are quite beautiful, Sonja," he said as he stared at her breasts in the soft light.

He moved towards her suddenly, grabbing a breast in each hand and shoving her back hard, squeezing them until she cried out in pain. He could hear her ragged breath as he held her and kissed and then brutally bit her neck. She fought against him, but he was strong and it only made him more ardent in his desire for her. He took one of her breasts in his mouth and bit down until she screamed. His hand began to move down her body and under her black panties. As his fingers entered her, he pulled up hard and smiled as she nearly choked from the pain. He held her like that for some time and he could feel some of the fight leave her. Then he stepped back and undid his pants and violently raped her until he felt her slump against the cold stone.

When he was finished, he gripped her neck and whispered in her ear. "Tell your bodyguard what he's missing." Then he redressed himself and walked away. One of his bodyguards untied her and she pulled her torn dress tightly around her as she lay shivering and gasping on the cold stone terrace.

...

Deeks had managed to get out of bed and walk around his apartment without too much pain, knowing he had to back up Kensi in the morning. He had tried to call her all day, but she wasn't answering her phone. That ticked him off, but maybe a little space was what they needed right now. They had been working closely together for almost three weeks, and they were getting on each other's nerves. What that meant for their future relationship, he wasn't sure.

Callen had called to let him know that his sources said the deal was going down just after noon tomorrow. He tried to call her again, but she didn't pick up. He was getting concerned because it was so late, when he heard a small knock on his door. He smiled and thought about what he would say to her to keep things light and smooth over their argument. Then he opened the door and his world fell apart.

"Kensi!" He caught her as she fell. Anger pounded in his heart as he carried her to the bed. She was shaking violently and her eyes were blank. He quickly stripped off what remained of her clothing and wrapped her in every blanket he could find. Then he lay down next to her and pulled her into his arms and began to slowly stroke her back.

"I've got you now, Kens," he said as angry tears filled his eyes. "I won't let him hurt you again, ever."

She cried softly into his chest and he felt her warm tears wet his shirt. Suddenly, she sobbed loudly and began to fight against him. He let her go and she struggled to free herself from the blankets. Her eyes were wild, but sharp, not blank like before. She pulled her knees up against her chest and covered herself in one of the blankets, staring at him as tears coursed down her face. They sat looking at each other and his anger was so hot he didn't think he would be able to speak.

"Can you help me shower?" she whispered, and the vulnerable, childlike look on her face, broke his heart.

He blinked away angry tears and helped her into the bathroom. As he unwrapped the blanket, he saw the vicious wounds and bruises on her body and it was all he could do to keep from grabbing his gun and running out to find Dante and shoot him down like the rabid animal he was. But, she needed him right now, so he helped her into the shower, holding her against him as the hot steamy water warmed her and she slowly stopped shaking. He helped her wash off the blood around her wounds and she watched him as he did it with a haunted look in her eyes. He almost retched when he saw the deep bite mark on her breast, and he pulled her gently to his chest and rocked her as she buried her head in his shoulder, the tears coming once again.

After she was dry, he gave her some of his sweats to put on, and helped her take a couple of the pain pills that Sam had left for him. Then he bundled her into bed and held her until she went to sleep. He closed the door, leaving the lights on, and then he walked into the bathroom and vomited into the sink.

"Callen, he raped her," Deeks spoke into the phone with such barely suppressed rage that the man on the other end didn't recognize his voice.

"Deeks?" he asked. Callen felt his heart begin to pound and he was up and out the door in seconds. He picked up Sam and they raced to the resort, sneaking in a side door and up to Deeks' room, arriving just before midnight.

When Deeks opened the door, he had a gun in his hand and a look on his face they had never seen before. Sam put his hand on the young cop's shoulder, but Deeks jerked free and continued to pace around the room like a caged animal. The rage on his face scared them both, because they knew it was hard to pull yourself back from the edge of vengeance and they knew that was the only thing on Deeks' mind right now.

"We need to see her, Deeks," Sam said quietly, hoping to calm him down.

"She's sleeping," he said in a barely audible voice. Callen could see his hand shaking as he held the gun and he walked slowly towards him.

"Give me the gun," Callen said as he approached with his hands out.

"Why?" Deeks asked as he turned to face him.

"Because, you're not in control and you know it." Callen said with intensity. He knew he had to take the situation in hand, because if he didn't, this operation was dead in the water. He wasn't sure if it could even be salvaged, as he looked at Deeks roam the room with that deadly look on his face.

"You won't be in control either after you see what he did to her," Deeks said harshly as his breath began to come in short gasps. He was starting to hyperventilate and Sam quickly grabbed his shoulders as Callen took the gun from his hand. He stood trembling as angry, hot tears filled his eyes and Sam steered him to the couch and made him put his head between his knees.

"I should have been with her," he said softly when he finally sat up.

"You weren't in any shape to help her, Deeks," Sam said as he started towards the bedroom.

The bedroom door opened and Kensi stepped into the room. Her dark hair was still wet, and hung tangled around her shoulders. Deeks' sweats were huge on her and they all noticed the blood soaking through the top over her left breast. She held tightly to the doorframe as Callen and Sam walked towards her. Her eyes were suddenly wary and they could see she was frightened as she stepped back at their approach.

"Kensi, it's us," Callen said softly as they both stopped.

"You know we would never hurt you, Kens," Sam said, his voice cracking as he realized how terrorized she must be to think the two of them were a threat to her.

"Deeks." she whispered, holding out her hand.

He was by her side in an instant and caught her as she started to crumple to the floor. He picked her up and laid her on the couch, smoothing her hair and brushing it back. Callen sucked in his breath as he saw the raw bite mark at the base of her neck.

"Sam, could you bring her a blanket?" Deeks asked as he fussed over her. She never took her eyes off him as he wrapped her in the blanket and sat stroking her cheek and wiping the tears as they fell.

"She needs a doctor," Sam said quietly to Callen.

"I'll call Hetty and tell her we have to scrub the operation," Callen nodded.

"No!" Kensi suddenly said loudly.

They all stopped and stared at her. Her eyes flashed angrily as she looked from one to the other.

"If we do that, he'll win," she said shakily, "And I can't let that happen."

"Kens, no," Deeks said, making her look at him. "You can barely walk."

"Neither can you," she said as her voice rose and her competitive nature asserted itself.

"We make a great team," he said, smiling briefly. Her face softened at his remark.

"The meeting with the suppliers is supposed to go down at noon today." Callen stood and dialed Hetty's number. "If you want to try this I need to know. Otherwise, we'll take both of you out of here right now."

Kensi looked at Deeks and his eyes questioned her resolve. He knew how badly she was hurt and she knew how weak he was, but the desire for revenge was strong. They had worked this case together for a long time, and the man who had hurt them both needed to pay for what he had done.

"I want to see the look on his face when we walk into that meeting together," Kensi said taking Deeks face in her hands. "Please, Deeks, I need to do this."

"Are you sure you can physically do it, Kensi?" Sam asked. "And you, Deeks?"

They looked at each other and nodded to Sam and Callen.

Hetty was not too happy about the decision, but she knew the two of them had the best shot at bringing this op to a close and shutting down a dangerous arms dealer and his supplier. She arranged for an agency doctor to visit them both and get them as physically ready as possible. How they would manage psychologically was unknown, maybe even to them.

After the doctor left, Sam and Callen said their goodbyes, assuring them they would be minutes away when they needed them.

Once they were alone, Kensi slumped against Deeks, scaring him.

"Kens, are you sure you can do this?" he asked as he helped her into the bed. She curled up into a ball as he covered her with blankets and got in behind her. He gently wrapped his arms around her and buried his face in her hair. His anger was just below the surface, overshadowed by fear for her when she encountered Dante in the morning. He had no idea how she would react, and he knew he would have to hold himself on a tight rein.

"I want to kill him, Marty," she said so quietly he almost missed it. When he realized what she had said, he knew tomorrow would be the most dangerous day of their partnership.

"Me too." Then he pulled her tightly to him and she threaded her fingers into his and they waited for morning to come.

...

Kensi was notified that the suppliers would be arriving at one o'clock in a small conference room just off the solarium where she had first met Marco Dante. She felt a chill run down her spine as she thought about that day and how she had flirted with him. What had she been thinking? Later, when they had run into each other in the bar, she had flirted again, kissing him lightly; even after getting a warning look from Deeks. She wondered if that was what had spurred her on to flirt more, not wanting him to control what she did or how she acted. Now, she knew how irresponsible she had been. Marty had much more experience being deep undercover than she had, but she didn't want to admit that he was better at something than she was and it had cost them both dearly.

She took a deep breath and stood up, trying not to stumble as she walked across the room. She felt how shaky and weak she was, and it took all of her energy and self control to open the door and walk down the hall to Deeks' room. When she knocked, she heard a muffled groan and she immediately used her key to enter. Marty was sitting on the floor, coughing up blood.

"Marty, what's wrong?" she asked as she sat down on the sofa next to him.

"I don't know, but my broken ribs are killing me," he said as he tried to stand up. "Give me a hand up, Kens."

"Maybe you shouldn't go," she said, but regretted it immediately when she saw the look on his face.

"Where you go, I go," he said standing unsteadily next to her. "We just have to help each other a little." He smiled and walked to the door, offering her his arm like they were going to a formal dance.

That's how they entered the conference room for the meeting, arm in arm, each with a slight smile on their face, until they saw Dante. Then they stood up straighter and walked past him without acknowledgement, but inwardly enjoyed the shocked look on his face. Deeks saw the anger that flashed just underneath the shock, but he had some anger of his own. He was determined not to show it too soon, but when he did he wasn't sure he would be able to control it. He could feel how weak Kensi was as she walked and after coughing up blood all morning, he wasn't in great shape either, but together they would be formidable when they needed to be.

Callen had told them that as soon as money was on the table after the suppliers arrived to give the word and they would be there to take everyone into custody. They stood together at the end of the table, afraid that if they sat down they wouldn't be able to get back up. They were looking at each other for encouragement when Dante walked up next to them. He took Kensi's elbow in his hand and leaned towards her.

"You look lovely this morning, my Sonja," he said softly. "It must be the afterglow of lovemaking."

Kensi stiffened and she could feel Deeks tremble with rage as he tried to keep himself from shooting him right then and there.

"Dante, I must apologize for lying to you," she said in reply. "I am having an affair with my bodyguard. Oh, and he isn't gay, by the way. He's my lover and a damn fine one, compared to you."

She smiled wickedly at him as she led Deeks to the other side of the table. Deeks thought Dante was going to have a heart attack; he was so purple with rage.

"Kens, you are amazing," he whispered.

They all turned as the door opened and the arms suppliers entered the room. The team had been waiting for over a month to find out who had been supplying military weapons to terrorists and now they would be able to put them out of business.

Deeks heard a sharp intake of breath from Kensi as they looked at the men who had just entered the room. And he saw recognition flare in the lead supplier's eyes. Kensi had been made.

Deeks immediately said the distress word that would bring Callen and Sam and the tactical squad, and then all hell broke loose as the man known to Kensi as Lieutenant Carl Montgomery, pointed and shouted that she was NCIS. Deeks pulled his gun and pushed Kensi behind him as they both fired towards Montgomery and his men. Everything seemed to play out in slow motion as gunshots shattered the quiet of the room. He started to move forward, when he saw Dante out of the corner of his eye. There was rage on his face as he fired his gun in their direction. Before Marty could turn and fire back, he heard Kensi cry out and he saw her go down.

"Kensi!" he shouted as he tried to reach her. He felt a searing pain as a bullet ripped into him and his legs collapsed under him. As he lay next to her he could see blood spread across her chest and fear screamed through his mind. As his vision began to fade, he looked up to see Dante standing over him, enraged, as he fired a gun at him. Then Dante's crotch exploded in blood and he screamed as he fell. Dante stared wild-eyed at Kensi as she smiled back at him and emptied her gun into his chest.

Callen and Sam raced into the room searching frantically for Kensi and Deeks, but the noise and smoke from the gunfire obscured their vision and their fear rose when they didn't see them. They were shocked when they saw Montgomery because they knew that Kensi had been made and fear clutched at them as they searched the room.

"Sam, they're over here!" Callen shouted as he knelt down next to Kensi. She was unconscious and bleeding badly from a chest wound.

"Is she alive?" Callen heard Deeks ask weakly as he lay bleeding and barely conscious on the floor next to her. "Please, tell me." Then he passed out before Callen could answer.

Callen had never seen Sam so shaken as he moved to lift Deeks and check for a pulse. "We can't lose both of them, G." His voice was barely above a whisper.

The two senior agents looked at each other and they saw fear in each other's eyes.

...

They were all silent as they waited outside of surgery. Hetty sat by herself and looked at Callen, knowing he was questioning himself as she was, about their decision to let the two young agents continue their assignment when they had both been so badly hurt. Sam sat with his eyes closed and none of the others would disturb him because they had seen how upset he was when Kensi and Deeks had been brought into emergency. Nell brought Hetty a cup of tea and then went to sit next to Eric, who had broken down when he heard what had happened.

"It wouldn't have happened if Montgomery wasn't involved," Callen said as he sat down next to Hetty.

"You're right Mr. Callen," Hetty nodded. "One can't control everything, especially in this business."

"Still, we probably should have pulled them out," he said sadly, still questioning his decision.

"But, in the long run, their bravery by staying on, will save a lot of lives," she replied. "And we shouldn't take that away from them."

They paused in their discussion as two surgeons walked into the room. Callen and Hetty stood and she took his arm, which surprised him. Sam didn't move, but he opened his eyes.

"Mr. Deeks is in recovery," the first surgeon said quickly. "We removed two bullets, one from his stomach and the other from his upper back. He had a punctured lung from a fractured rib, so we have him on a ventilator to help him breathe. You can see him in a couple of hours."

The other surgeon looked down at the floor before beginning and they all stiffened at the subtle signal. "Miss Blye suffered a gunshot wound to the chest that nicked her heart," he said slowly. "She went into cardiac arrest on the table, but we were able to resuscitate her. She's on life support right now, and we have her in ICU. We are doing all we can, but it's going to be a fight. I'm sorry I can't be more encouraging, but we'll know more in the next twenty-four hours."

"Can we see her?" Sam asked quietly.

"Not right now, but maybe in the morning." the surgeon nodded and then left quickly.

Silence returned as they looked at each other, knowing there was nothing to say.

...

Deeks struggled as he started to wake and pain flashed through his body. He had to find Kensi. He remembered all the blood and fear stirred in his heart. Then he felt a strong hand on his arm and he opened his eyes to see Sam standing by his bed. He tried to ask Sam about Kensi, but he realized he couldn't talk because he was on a ventilator and that scared him. He fought against it, but Sam shook his head and he stopped.

"Calm down, Deeks," Sam said quietly. He could see the panic in Deeks eyes and he knew he needed to know about Kensi, but he wasn't sure how much to tell him. "Kensi's alive, Deeks. She's here in the hospital, in ICU." He felt Deeks relax under is hand and watched as he slowly closed his eyes again.

"How's he doing?" Callen asked as he came in.

"Scared about Kensi," Sam said softly. Sam hated seeing Deeks on a ventilator. He probably had a punctured lung when he went into the meeting and Sam was amazed at how he had managed to stay on his feet, let alone take part in a firefight. The two of them had taken on eight men before he and Callen and the tactical squad had gotten there and had managed to take out half of them before being shot. He was impressed.

"How much did you tell him?" Callen asked as they moved away from the bed.

"As little as possible." Sam said. "He needed to know she's alive."

"They were pretty amazing, weren't they?" Callen said shaking his head with an admiring smile.

"Yeah, they still are, G," Sam said optimistically as they left.

...

When Deeks came off the ventilator two days later, Hetty was there to greet him. She thought he looked sad and it concerned her.

"How are you feeling, Mr. Deeks?" she asked, trying to keep her voice upbeat.

"You can tell me, Hetty," he said with a soft resigned voice. "I know Sam lied to me." His eyes misted over for a minute and it only took her a couple of seconds to realize what he was thinking.

"Mr. Deeks, what do you think Sam lied to you about?" she asked, her face instantly serious.

"He told me Kensi was alive." Deeks said closing his eyes and she saw his hands form into fists by his sides as his body tensed.

"Have I ever lied to you, Marty?" she said and she saw his eyes open quickly at her use of his first name.

"No."

"Kensi is alive," she said patting his hand until his fist relaxed. "She's in critical condition, but she's alive."

A brief smile flashed across his face and his eyes watered as he took her hand.

"Thank you, Hetty. Can I see her?" he asked, as his eyes pleaded with her.

"First, you better apologize to me," Sam said as he walked to the bed. "I don't lie, Deeks, remember that."

"Even when you're undercover?" Deeks said lightly with a crooked grin.

"Okay, you got me there," Sam laughed. Then his face turned serious. "I saw her this morning, Deeks."

Concern flooded Deeks' face as he waited for Sam to continue.

"She's pretty weak, but she nodded at me." He wanted to tell Deeks just how serious her condition was, but he knew it was too soon. "They have her on a ventilator, so she isn't able to talk, but she's awake and that's a good sign."

"As soon as you are both able, I'll make sure you can go see her." Hetty promised him. "Now, get some rest, Mr. Deeks, and we will see you in the morning."

When the two were out of the room, Sam turned and gave Hetty a stern look. "Don't promise him more than you can deliver, Hetty," Sam said solemnly.

"Kensi's a fighter, Sam," she retorted. "And Deeks needs to fight, too. If he has no hope that she will survive, I'm afraid he won't fight to recover."

"They need each other more than ever, now," Sam said, shaking his head. "I don't know if she heard me, but I told Kensi that Deeks was okay. That's when she nodded at me."

"Let's hope they will fight to survive for each other." Hetty said and she was confident they would for the first time in days.

...

The week Kensi came off the ventilator, whoever saw her had to carry a message to Deeks and whoever visited Deeks was always asked to take a message back to Kensi. Finally, Hetty gave them each their cell phones back, but the doctors would only allowed them to use them for brief periods that first week. They both had a long road ahead, but both surgeons were confident that they would both make a full recovery.

Deeks suffered a setback when his injured lung collapsed as he attempted to prove he was strong enough to get out of bed at the end of the second week. Callen thought Sam was going to kill him. He also thought Sam had turned into an old grandmother when it came to the two young agents, and he started calling him Grammy Sam.

"You call me that one more time, G, and I'm gonna pop you one," Sam said as he glared at his partner. "I'm just trying to make sure they stay on track in their recovery."

"Whatever you say, Grammy Sam," Callen laughed and ducked as Sam threw a small jello container at his head.

"It does have a certain ring to it, Sam," Deeks said, enjoying the show. He was smiling at them, but they could tell something was bothering him. The last couple of days, he hadn't said much unless someone asked him something, and long silences were becoming a regular part of a visit with him. It was not normal for Deeks not to talk, and they all began to discuss it privately. Hetty decided to talk with him about it.

"Tell me what's bothering you, Mr. Deeks," Hetty said bluntly one evening.

"What do you mean, Hetty?" he asked, with a surprised look on his face.

"Don't shine me on, kid," she grumbled. "You have been way too quiet these last few days, and it's not like you. So, what is it?"

Deeks looked down as he fiddled with one of his bandages, his face full of emotion as he tried to collect his thoughts. When he looked up there were tears in his eyes and she was surprised at how vulnerable he looked and so very young.

"Hetty, I think I have to resign from my liaison position," he said with a long deep sigh. Then he looked down again, afraid to meet her eye.

She was stunned.

"Why, Mr. Deeks?" she asked, completely baffled by what had brought him to this decision.

"I don't think it's safe for Kensi and I to be partners anymore." There was an earnest look on his face that she couldn't dismiss easily. She could see that he had thought deeply about the decision and knew that was why he had been so quiet over the last few days.

"I'm in love with her, Hetty, and I think it effects how we work together," he lay back on his pillow and stared at the ceiling. "I've gone over the operation again and again in my head, and I think things would have gone differently if we hadn't been in a relationship."

"I'm not so sure about that Mr. Deeks," Hetty said, as she watched him fight his emotions. She knew he felt he had found a home at NCIS, and leaving the team that had become like a family to him would be very difficult.

"I think our relationship changed the way Kensi behaved towards Marco Dante." Deeks' expression darkened as he spoke the name. "My being there put her in danger, Hetty, and I can't do that to her again. It almost got her killed."

"Aren't you taking on more of the guilt than should be yours?" she asked. "What about Kensi's behavior? Shouldn't she bear some of the responsibility, Mr. Deeks?"

He immediately began to shake his head until Hetty put her hand up.

"Mr. Deeks, I have been doing undercover ops like this for a long, long time," she said softly. "Some have been with good partners, some with average partners, and some with partners that I wanted to shoot for being incompetent. Every partner brings something different to an operation and the more you are in tune with your partner, the better you silently communicate when you need to. The one thing you can never control, however, is how the subject of your investigation is going to react to you or to your partner and to however you are playing him. You and Kensi couldn't control Marco Dante's behavior, and that had nothing to do with your relationship with Miss Blye."

He stared at her for the longest time, and she could see all the emotions and questions play out across his face.

"Give yourself more time," she told him as she got up to leave. "Think what this will mean to you and to her and the rest of us as well. We don't want to lose you, Marty." She patted his hand and left him staring at the ceiling, amazed at what Hetty had said.

...

Kensi hated being in the hospital, especially for this long. But, she had never been shot before. When Deeks had been shot earlier in the year, she had wondered how painful it was when he would grimace at times. She had no idea it would feel like this. She felt like a large boulder was sitting on her chest and the burning sensation that would sear through her at times was almost too much to bear. Thank God for pain medication, she thought.

She had been thrilled when they took her off the ventilator after six days. She had wanted to kill the charge nurse and the surgeon for keeping her hooked up to that machine for so long. But, as soon as she was off of it, she realized how hard it was for her to breathe and she panicked a little. The charge nurse she had wanted to kill then became her best friend as she talked to her and calmed her down and she slowly felt her panic subside.

After her third week, she actually felt like she would be okay. But the first day she woke up, she had felt like she was dying, and the look on Sam's face almost convinced her that she was. But when he told her Deeks was alive and would to be okay, some of her dread went away and she longed to see him and touch him and she began to fight harder to stay alive.

When she knew her cover had been blown during the meeting with the arms suppliers and had seen Marty draw his gun, she was sure they were both going to die. She resigned herself to it almost immediately, but she remembered feeling such overwhelming sorrow at the thought of him being killed because of her, that she almost couldn't breathe. To know he had survived was such a comfort, now, and she couldn't wait to see him. But there was a fear deep inside her that she worried over at night. A fear that he would blame her for all of it. And she didn't know how she would deal with that if he did. She already blamed herself, but if he couldn't get past her mistake, it would break her heart.

As she thought about the consequences if that happened, the door to her room swung wide open and a large gurney came rolling in carrying a smiling Marty Deeks. He looked like a little boy on an amusement park ride, holding his arms wide to catch the wind. She couldn't stop the tears or the laughter that caught in her throat when she saw him.

"Hey Kens, long time no see," he practically shouted. Sam and Callen were doing the pushing, and they had a few choice comments about their passenger.

"He's gained weight, Kens, I can tell you that," Callen said as he wiped the sweat from his forehead.

"Yeah, he's a real porker, now, from eating all this great hospital food," Sam agreed. "That's why it took us so long to get here."

"Yeah, well if you guys hadn't hit every wall on the way here, we would have been here hours ago." Marty was having fun for the first time in three weeks, and she was delighted to hear the raucous banter between them. It made things seem almost normal.

"Is this a jail break, or did you actually get permission for this?" she asked laughing a little. She was surprised that it hurt to laugh, but then she hadn't had the opportunity for a while.

"Hetty worked it out with the surgeons and the head of the hospital," Callen said as he and Sam arranged the beds so the two of them were facing each other.

"You've got one hour," Sam nodded at them as he backed out of the room. "No, nooky," he said laughing and wagging a finger at them.

"Or Grammy Sammy will know about it," Callen remarked before Sam hit him with a magazine.

Then they were alone.

They both reached out at the same time to touch the other, neither one speaking for the longest time, but just drinking in the sight of one another.

"I've missed you so much," Kensi said as her voice caught and tears were fresh in her eyes.

"Are you okay?" Deeks asked his standard question and it made her smile at the familiarity.

"I'm good," she said and they both laughed at the old routine.

Again they became silent, not needing to say anything, just needing the comfort of each other's presence.

"I thought you died," Deeks whispered as he began to stroke her leg. She could see the sadness that still lingered from that belief. He looked down and swallowed hard. "I don't know what I would have done without you in my life, Kens," he told her, finally looking at her and seeing tears stream from her eyes.

"I thought we were both going to be killed in the shoot out," she said. "I couldn't bear being the cause of your death. I wanted you to live, even without me, I wanted you to live and be happy."

Hearing her say that she thought she was to blame for what happened broke something in him and he threw his covers off and started to climb out of bed. He had to get closer to her, to hold her and tell her the shoot out wasn't her fault. He didn't want her to carry that kind of guilt, so he struggled towards her, ignoring the physical pain until he was lying beside her, gently taking her face in his hands and kissing her softly. She stroked his cheek as she exulted in the closeness of his body. She slowly ran her fingers through his hair as he caressed her face and arms. Then they lay facing each other, and he couldn't keep his hands off her.

"It wasn't your fault, Kensi," he said solemnly as he kissed her and brushed her hair back from her forehead. He saw the serious doubt in her eyes, and he kissed each one as he repeated what he told her. She had to believe him, and he would stay here with her until she did.

"It's not your fault I was shot, Kens. You were made and that's not your fault." He held her face in his hands, trying to make her believe him. Tears slowly slid down her cheeks and she nodded. He kissed her so tenderly, then, that she smiled with joy and laughed lightly. His laugh joined hers as they lay looking into each other's eyes.

"You know your gorgeous ass is hanging out in plain sight, don't you?" she said, smiling suggestively.

"Yeah, but Grammy Sammy told us no nooky," he laughingly replied. "So keep your hands off my ass."

"How's he going to know I touched your beautiful butt?" she asked, her eyebrows rising.

"Grammas just know these things," he said as he slowly explored her lower body with his hand.

"What exactly do you think you're doing under there?" she asked as she snuggled closer to him.

"Discovering that you don't wear undies in the hospital." He was really excited now and she saw the wicked look in his eyes as his hand slowly moved seductively across her hips, affectionately squeezing her ass and down her stomach. Then he heard her catch her breath sharply and he immediately took his hand away, realizing he had caused her pain.

"I'm sorry, Kens, I should have been able to control myself," he apologized.

"It was worth it," she said as she slowly got the pain under control. "Besides, I've seen myself in the mirror and I look like hell, so your little exploration made me feel like a woman again, instead of a patient."

"You're a beautiful and amazing woman, Kensi," he said as he lightly traced her lips with his thumb. Then he kissed her and he felt his body respond as her tongue teased his, exploring and reveling in the intimacy they had missed for so long.

Their embrace ended with a soft knock on the door.

"You two decent in there?" Hetty inquired.

Deeks practically ripped his stitches out scrambling back to his bed, but Hetty gave him just enough time before coming into the room with a small, tight smile on her face.

"You look a little flushed, Mr. Deeks," she said saucily, thoroughly enjoying his discomfort and the look of surprise on their faces. "Are you both okay?"

"We're good," they said in unison, and then they all laughed together.

...