A/N: Crack!fic (though my beta observed it might be a bit too close to the truth to truly be crack!fic ;) ). Also, spoilers through The Wedding of River Song.


As the hooded figure approached, his companions stepped back a pace but the Doctor stood his ground.

"So, we've come here at last," the creature breathed, it's breath rancid in the Doctor's face.

"So we have," the Doctor agreed.

"And now here, on the plains of Trenzalore, at the Fall of the Eleventh, when all must answer and none may lie, the question so many have fought for so long to prevent being asked. The question which, when answered, will transform the Universe, tear apart the -"

"Right. Got all that. I believe you mentioned a question...?"

"Are you sure you want to rush me?"

"Well, I haven't got all day. Well, actually, I do have all day. I'd just rather not spend it here. So if you wouldn't mind getting on with it?"

The full force of its gaze turned on the Doctor, the figure spoke, "Very well, then, Doctor. The question. The first question. Hidden... Are you tapping your foot?"

"I thought we'd agreed...?"

"Fine, Doctor. Then here it is: Doctor who?"

"Are you sure?"

"Sure about what?"

"Sure that's the one you want to ask?"

The figure nodded beneath it's hood. "Of course."

"Absolutely positive? Because you've only got one shot at this, you know. Not interested in my favourite ice cream flavor? Football team? Colour... No. That one's obvious, isn't it?"

"Doctor, now who's wasting time? Just answer the question. Doctor who?"

"Fine. If you insist. It's Pond."

"Pond? Pond? What kind of stupid answer is that?"

"Doctor Pond," he corrected.

The creature paused for a moment, clearly confused. Then... "That's not how it works!"

From his place behind the Doctor, Rory spoke up for the first time, "Uhm... Yeah. Actually. It is."