Haunted

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. A short oneshot on how Ginny felt when she saw Harry's body. Lyrics are from Taylor Swift's song, Haunted.

You and I walk a fragile line
I have known it all this time
But I never thought I'd live to see it break

She had known very well what loving Harry meant. What with the blooming war and numerous attempts on Harry's life, she really should not have been so surprised to see him in Hagrid's arms, cold and lifeless. But that didn't make it hurt any less. Harry always seemed to get away with everything, always seemed to make it out alive, though with numerous scars – physical and emotional. But she was so unprepared for this, for losing Harry. Her shattered heart disappeared, leaving an empty hole in its place.

It's getting dark, and it's all too quiet
And I can't trust anything now
And it's coming over you like it's all a big mistake

The war had taken its toll on her. Things were getting darker than before, and the crowd's shocked silence seemed to numb her even more. She didn't know what to think. The evidence before her eyes were clear – Harry was dead. If he was alive, he would have done something by now, the crowd wouldn't have been so deathly still. She felt Ron and Hermione beside her, cold and disbelieving, but crying all the same. They knew it was over. Harry was gone. But why couldn't she accept it? She did not want to trust the truth, couldn't trust the truth. Her mind kept telling her, you are making a huge mistake. Accept the truth! For if you can't trust the truth, what can you trust?

Oh, I'm holding my breath
Won't lose you again
Something's made your eyes go cold

She held her breath tightly, praying with all her might that some miracle might occur. She tried with all her strength, willing Harry to be alive. All those months after their break-up had been torture, waiting for some news that would reassure her that Harry was not gone. But at that time, she had thought she had lost Harry completely. How long would he be away? How long could she wait? Those questions remained unanswered in her mind. But then, today, when she saw him again, she knew it was almost over. The war would end today, she would get Harry back. No, this cannot be happening. She won't lose Harry again, this time for good. His startling green eyes were shut tightly, and with it, the warmth in his eyes was also shut away. Cold. Numb. Denial.

Come on, come on, don't leave me like this
I thought I had you figured out
Something's gone terribly wrong
You're all I wanted

Come on, come on, don't leave me like this
I thought I had you figured out
Can't breathe whenever you're gone
Can't turn back now, I'm haunted

She couldn't live without Harry, not now, not ever. It was a plain and simple truth. After pining for him for so many years, it was only in sixth year that her dreams had come true. Harry had kissed her, had loved her too. She was no longer shut out, but became his confidante along with Ron and Hermione. And she was starting to understand Harry much better, figuring out the forces that govern his mind. And that just made her fall for him even more. She thought that maybe after this war they might have a future together. But that had all gone terribly wrong. She wasn't even sure about what next to do! She had always pictured herself with Harry, no one else. And with Harry gone, it seemed like she had stopped breathing too! All those memories of Harry…would haunt her for life.

Stood there and watched you walk away
From everything we had
But I still mean every word I said to you

When they broke up, she just stood there as he walked away. Walked away from all those times they had spent together, all those memories they had shared. She knew he still cared, that he had done this so that in some way, she would be protected. But it did hurt, nonetheless. And to some point, it had worked. She had suffered cruel punishments, but other than that, not attempts were made on her life. She was still alive, well and whole – but Harry was not. She hoped, wherever Harry was, that he knew she still meant everything she had said, still loved him deeply.

He would try to take away my pain
And he just might make me smile
But the whole time I'm wishing he was you instead

During the war, Neville was a great help. Whenever she would sink down into the depths of pain and despair, he was the one that brought her back up, that had motivated her to keep on fighting. In more ways than one, he had become as good as her brother, always looking out for her, and cheering her up. But she never stopped wishing that Harry was the one with her, the one protecting her, the one fighting with her. She missed him terribly, but tried to stay strong. It was completely irrational; Harry was not safe in Hogwarts, not with him being the Undesirable No. 1 and all. But still, she couldn't help but wish all the same.

Oh, I'm holding my breath
Won't see you again
Something keeps me holding on to nothing

Turning back to the present, she stared at Harry's limp body again. She was still holding her breath, and praying, willing things to be okay. She couldn't stand not being able to see Harry again, the pain was too much. Ron kept whispering, "He's gone…" I couldn't imagine what it must be like for him. After losing… Fred, he had lost his best mate, his brother, his confidante all at one go! But I was still numb, refusing to believe. The small, rational part of me asked me to stop my nonsense, but my whole body was grasping at straws, holding on for some sort of miracle that seemed non-existent. It just is not true!

Come on, come on, don't leave me like this
I thought I had you figured out
Something's gone terribly wrong
You're all I wanted

Come on, come on, don't leave me like this
I thought I had you figured out
Can't breathe whenever you're gone
Can't turn back now, I'm haunted

She continued praying, her eyes disbelieving, hoping for some miracle. The prayer pulsed through her head, as Lord Voldemort's voice washed over her, carrying the words she did not want to hear. She called again and again, "Harry, Harry!" But no response came.

I know, I know
I just know
You're not gone
You can't be gone, no

After all this time, after pining for Harry for so long, she remained in denial. There was no way he could be gone, not when he was the reason she was fighting. She fell to her knees. A symbol hope for many, the only person who could finish the war was gone. But she didn't care. Her Harry was not gone, any second now and he would stand back up and start fighting…No?

Come on, come on, don't leave me like this
I thought I had you figured out
Something's gone terribly wrong
Won't finish what you started

Come on, come on, don't leave me like this
I thought I had you figured out
Can't breathe whenever you're gone
Can't go back, I'm haunted

If you won't come back for me Harry, then at least come back for all the people here, and finish the war that you started. Finish off Voldemort, and finish the reign of terror? It was then Ron shouted, "He beat you!" I pulled myself back to the present, and gathered me wits around me, ready to fight. I would probably die in this battle too, but not before taking as many Death Eaters as I can.

You and I walk a fragile line
I have known it all this time
Never ever thought I'd see it break
Never thought I'd see it

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