A/N: This one goes out to Mariah94, who asked for a new E/O FF and my muse instantly returned… so thank you, Mariah94, for giving me back my muse. =))

It had been close to eight months since Elliot had turned in his resignation, and over the course of those eight months Olivia hadn't heard a single word from him. She had called his cell phone the day he'd left, to find that it was disconnected, and when she rang Kathy's phone, that too had been disconnected. There was no way to track him, and she realized that he was avoiding her.

What she couldn't understand was why. Why hadn't he bothered to tell her that he was leaving? Why hadn't he given her a chance to say goodbye? She understood if the job had been too much. She understood that he had killed a young girl, and it was something he couldn't live with if he remained on the job. Olivia understood, as she always did. But she was his best friend, how had he found it so easy to just turn his back and walk away without a word?

It wasn't that he knew how deeply in love with him she had been. After all, he'd always been married, and when he had been divorced, she hadn't been there with him in order to see if they were meant to be. Olivia accepted that he was her soulmate but she wasn't his, and she had always been content just being his friend. It was enough for her… until he left without a word.

So when the phone rang at her desk, late one Friday night, the last person she expected to hear from was Elliot himself.

"Olivia Benson!" she answered in the same business-like tone she'd always answered the phone with.

"Liv," his voice streamed through the receiver.

Olivia gasped in surprise. It was a voice she had dreamt about for many years, a voice that no matter how many years she'd have to live without it, she'd never forget. Her hand flew to her erratically beating heart and her concentration regarding the paperwork in front of her was quickly forgotten.

"Elliot?" she breathed. Olivia felt the air get trapped in her lungs and for a moment she could have sworn her heart stopped beating.

"Yeah," he replied. His voice sounded strange. "How are you?"

The anger was quick to rise, following the shock of hearing his voice. What right did he have to call her and ask how she was, as if nothing untoward had happened between them? As if he had simply seen her the day before. Olivia was livid. For eight months she and grieved inconsolably for him. She had cried herself to sleep every night, wondering why he didn't care enough about her to at least warrant a goodbye.

"I'm flippin' fantastic," she snapped, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "How are you?"

There was a short pause.

"You must be angry," he said quietly.

"No," she said. "I'm happy as a clam. Why would I be angry?"

Elliot sighed through the phone. "I'd like to explain myself. Will you meet me?"

"No," she stated bluntly.

"No?"

"That's right, no. I won't meet you. I won't pretend that I only saw you yesterday. I won't talk to you like we spoke only an hour ago, you pompous ass! I was your partner!" Olivia was seething. "Did that mean nothing to you?"

"You know you did," he replied. "I really want to explain-"

"I'm not interested!" she hissed. "You lost that right when you threw it all away eight months ago. Eight months, El! What the hell did you think you were doing? I had a right to know your decision. I had a right to a goodbye, and you never even gave me that. I haven't heard from you in eight months, and now you decide to call. I don't owe you any favours."

Olivia hadn't done as well as she would have liked, without him. She came to the precinct everyday and did her job with no emotion and very little compassion for those she once had it for. When she went home, she curled up on the couch and cried, eating very little and associating with no one. She'd lost a lot of weight since he'd been gone, and Cragen, Fin and Munch had been worried. Olivia refused drinks with the boys after work. She refused a new partner, and when she was assigned to one, she made their life a living hell until they asked the Captain for someone else.

Cragen went easy on her, knowing that her rebellious nature came from a dark place, a place where she missed what she'd never had, a place where she couldn't understand why she had been abandoned, again by someone she completely trusted. A place where she still held onto the hope that maybe he'd come back for her.

But Olivia was no longer under that illusion. She was passing the grieving period and she was angry. VERY angry!

"You don't owe me anything," he agreed. "You're right, what I did was mean and selfish-"

"Damn right, it was!" she interrupted.

"Will you be the bigger person and meet me. Let me explain why… give me a chance to make things better… please, Liv…"

She closed her eyes at the way he said her name. She'd missed that among other things. But she had to protect her heart. She had to protect herself from that same measure of hurt that she could never get over. Because if she was hurt by him again, she was afraid that she just might not survive it.

"No," she whispered holding back the tears. No, she didn't have the strength to go through it all again. "You messed up. Deal with it." She slammed the phone down then, and sat at her desk trembling. Olivia hadn't been prepared for that phone call.

"Who was that?" Cragen asked from his office doorway.

Olivia avoided his eyes. "No one," she muttered. "Wrong number."

I might leave you here… hehehehe… haven't done a cliff-hanger in a while. Don't worry I have plans for the next chapter, taken from Elliot's POV. =)

Reviews tell me you would like me to write the next chapter.