A/N: Okay so first I just want to say I'm sorry this took so damn long. With Thanksgiving, Clean up, Christmas decorating, and just my overall laziness I was to busy. I was also kind of putting it off because I don't know I already planned it out, but I just didn't feel like writing. Anyways so about it being in Pauls POV well, I decided to do the ending of the last chapter (Maybe a little more) in Pauls POV, but because kAsS3695 asked so nicely to keep it in it's normal POV the rest of the chapter will be.
I realized I never did a disclaimer sooo here it is!: I do not own Twilight or any of it's characters. All characters, except for my OC's, belong to Stephenie Meyer!
On with the story!
Chapter Five – In Paul's Mind/Hurting Me
-PAULS POV-
"So, I was wondering if you would like to have dinner with us tonight?" She asked me without looking up. I loved how shy she got. I gently put my hand under her chin and forced her to look up at me, she had the most beautiful eyes.
"I would love to." I told her softly, hoping she would hear how sincere I was. I couldn't help myself as I brushed a strand of hair behind her ear, her skin was so soft and her hair was like silk. Damn it this imprinting shit was turning me into some whipped little pup. She has so much power over me, did I have power over her? Well, there is only one way to find out.
I gently cupped the back of her neck and noted the slightly shocked look in her eyes. I moved closer to her and even though every pore in my body was telling me to kiss her, I didn't. I saw the way she puckered those soft kissable lips and shut her eyes, but I help back and simply kissed her cheek. At least now I knew she wanted me.
I saw the surprise on her face as she looked up at me, but there was also some confusion and... hurt? Yea, that was definitely hurt. Fuck! I hurt my imprint. I'm such an asshole. I couldn't stand looking into her sad face anymore and turned to look at the TV, why had I done that? Why did I always have to prove myself? I heard a loud sigh before she spoke to me again.
"What the hell was that, Paul?" Uh oh, she was pissed. I inwardly flinched and threw her a quick glance. She was still as beautiful as ever, but the anger in those beautiful blue/gold orbs kinda scared me. Oh who am I kidding I thought she looked sexy as hell.
"What was what?" I asked her casually. Hopefully I could just play this off and hope for the best. She wouldn't hold a grudge would she?
"You were going to kiss me weren't you?" She started off sounding strong and confident, but towards the last two words her voice weakened and it sounded like she was about to cry. I tried to laugh it off, but I don't think it helped much.
'I was going to kiss your cheek, which I did." I told her plainly. Please, just let this go! How could I explain to her that I did it to prove to myself that she couldn't control me? She didn't know about the imprint and it would just freak her out. Out of the corner of my eye I saw her wipe away a tear. Fuck. Shit. Damn it. Fuck. Fuck. FUCK! I made her CRY! I don't deserve her.
"You are such an asshole." She practically whispered as she finally turned away from me. I sighed lightly, she had stopped crying and talking. I could stop freaking out. I should lighten the mood. Maybe a few witty comments will calm her down and make her forget about it all.
"I thought you knew that already?" I said smugly trying to get her to laugh. God, please make her laugh. I looked at her, but I don't think I should have. She had an angry yet lustful look in her eyes that scared the shit out of me. Suddenly she sat up and got on her knees and just looked at me for a second. Next thing I know my head is between her small hands and her lips are pressed against mine. Hard. At first I was to surprised to really react, but once my wolf side came to and realized my imprint was kissing me? I went crazy.
I grabbed her hips and growled possessively into her mouth. She tasted like heaven and her lips were so soft, I never wanted to stop kissing her. She pulled away way to quickly and I immediately tried to pull her back, but to my surprise she turned her cheek towards me so I kissed it instead of her mouth. I pulled away and looked at her confused. She had on an innocent little smile as she spoke to me.
"I'm sorry I thought you were going to kiss my cheek?" She pulled away from me completely and sat back down. I was dumbfounded to say the least, how had she managed to turn this against me? Well, at least her Aunt hadn't walked in.
Her Aunt walked in only moments later asking if I could stay for dinner. I was about to reply when I felt Alex kick me in the leg with the side of her foot and turn to the older woman.
"Sorry, auntie Carol, but Paul already has dinner plans with some of his friends." She told her Aunt calmly. Great so now she didn't even want me to stay for dinner. Man I messed this up. I would have to talk to Sam about it later, maybe who could tell me how to fix this. I nodded numbly as her Aunt looked at me to confirm, but my stare stayed focused on Alex. She has turned back to the TV, but I knew she knew I was looking at her. I sighed and stood while stretching my arms above my head.
"I should probably get going." I said simply still watching for some kind of reaction from Alex, but she didn't even glance up.
"Alex, why don't you walk Paul to the door." Mrs. Webber told her calmly. I had never been more grateful to a parental figure as I was right then. Alex sighed, but nodded and stood up, mimicking my stretch. She started to walk away and I followed her with my head down. I felt like a puppy that had just been scolded for peeing on the carpet. Alex opened the door and looked at me expectantly as she waved her hand in a sweeping motion towards outside. I sighed.
"Alex, are you mad at me?" I asked her softly trying to get her to look at me with some sort of emotion. She gave me a fake smile and leaned against the door frame.
'Nope, why would I be mad at you?" She questioned in a too sweet voice. I ran a hand through my hair and nodded slowly before walking out of the house. I tried to turn back around and talk to her, but she just shut the door in my face. Wonderful.
-ALEX'S POV-
I had purposely made sure Paul didn't stay for dinner after our kiss, because: 1. I was extremely embarrassed. 2. I was still mad at him. And 3. It would of just been awkward. I walked him out and made sure he knew that this wasn't going to just blow over before slamming the door in his face, needless to say, I was proud of myself.
I had been bold and taken control of the situation and in the end I had gotten what I wanted; A kiss from Paul. So why did I feel so horrible? I could tell he felt bad before I shut the door in his face, but he deserved it! Didn't he? UGH! Why did my mind have to be so damn conflicted whenever it came to him? I would definitely need to talk to Angela tonight.
Angela finally got home around four, but she was in a bad mood. I tried to talk to her and she told me she didn't have time to deal with my "issues" today. I know she didn't mean to be rude, but I was shocked none the less. Even Aunt Carol seemed to be surprised when Angela, to put it nicely, told me off, but didn't say a word about it. We had dinner that night without Angela and when her mom tried to to get her to eat something she just yelled to leave her alone. I was worried, but at the same time kind of put off by her behavior.
Angela had always been nice and sweet, but now? Now she was freaking out and wouldn't tell anyone why or even let anyone close enough to ask why. I tried to talk to her again later, not about my life, but she just told me that my voice was "interrupting her thoughts" this was definitely not the Angela I knew. So here I was, sitting out side her door.
Just waiting for her to come out so I could tackle her and force her to tell me what the hell was going on. I heard her bed move and immediately got read to pounce. Her bedroom door opened a crack before she stuck her head out and tip toed out, but she didn't get far before I called to her.
"Going somewhere?" She whipped around a looked at me before narrowing her eyes and stalking over to me.
"Yes, Alex. Now if you don't mind I would like you to leave me alone." She said poking me in the chest. I stared at her for a moment before shoving her hand away.
"What the hell is your problem Angela? All of us are worried about you, but you're just acting like some selfish bitch. Just tell me what's wrong!" I yelled at her. She seemed taken aback by the sudden rise of my voice, but stood her ground.
"I'm not being a "selfish bitch" as you put it, I just want to be left alone. Is that to much to ask?" He voice was quiet, but still menacing. I sighed.
"No, but I'm worried about you Ang... Please tell me what's wrong?" She looked at me for a second before sighing and looking at the floor.
"I heard a rumor that Ben is planning on asking some girl out. It just... put me in a bad mood I guess." Her lower lips started to quiver and I realized she was about to start crying.
"Ang, it's okay. How do you know Ben is going to ask some girl out? Better yet how do you know that "girl" isn't you?" I told her with a small smile. She looked up at me and seemed to contemplate what I said.
"You really think it might be me?" She asked.
"Absolutely! How could he not want to date you? I mean not to make this awkward, but you are a sexy beast Ang." I told her dramatically while giving her a fake once over.
"Yea, I could definitely go lesbian for you." I said with a nod of my head and Angela smiled before bursting into a fit of giggles. I started laughing to and we went back to her room and sat on her bed. Angela told me more about this Ben guy and from what I could tell he seemed to be perfect for her, but hey every guy seems perfect when a girl speaks highly of him.
"So how are things with you and Paul?" Angela suddenly asked, breaking through my train of thought. I made a face and looked at the floor.
"So you saw him today?" she laughed. I nodded and looked up at her while trying to figure out how to explain this.
"I kissed him." I blurted out. Angela's eyes widened as she stared at me.
"You... You kissed him? You kissed Paul? Asshole Paul that just yesterday you denied liking?" It was obvious that she was shocked as she stared at me. I flinched, but nodded as I watched her.
"How the hell did that happen?" She asked me. So explained to her how he came over, made me think he was going to kiss me, how he was an asshole about it, and finally how I practically jumped him.
"You just kissed him? Just like that?" She questioned as she stared at me as if I had two heads.
"Yea, kinda. I don't know what came over me, Ang! I just lost it and attacked him!" I cried. "He probably thinks I'm some slut now." I said softly and started to pull at a loose strong on the bottom of my shirt.
"I doubt that Alex, he did try to pull you back for more. He obviously has a thing for you and he always tries to be close to you. That in itself should prove to you that he likes you." I knew she was right he had tried to pull me back and he did just come over today not to mention when he got so jealous of Seth and I. But if he did like me? I probably screwed it up when I shut the door in his face.
"Umm hey Ang?" She looked at me and nodded for me to continue. "Do you think he would still like me after I uninvited him for dinner and shut a door in his face?" I asked her guiltily. Once again her eyes doubled in size as she stared at me.
"Please tell me that didn't actually happen." I bit my lip and looked away form her.
"Well..."
'ALEX! Why would you do that!" She asked frantically.
"I was mad at him! It's his own fault for being an asshole!" I defended myself as she shook her head.
"Good luck with this relationship. If there are this many problems in the beginning? I don't even want to know what will happen when you guy's get serious." She chuckled lightly. I pouted, but didn't say anything. She was right, maybe Paul and I just weren't meant to be.
I was currently walking over to the beach hoping to find Seth so I could ask him about Paul and how forgiving he tended to be, but once again I was lost. I don't know how such a small town could confuse me so much, but my sense of direction was horrible. I sighed and plopped down in the middle of the road cross legged and closed my eyes.
"Oh mighty direction god, please tell me where the hell to go!" I called to no one. I opened one eye and glanced around, nothing had changed. I sighed and laid on my back, yes I know it's stupid to lay in the middle of the road, but it's not like it was very busy. I shut my eyes again and just waited for something extraordinaire to happen, but as luck has it Paul happened instead.
"Are you trying to get yourself killed?" He said and I opened my eyes to find him staring at me from above. I looked at him for a second before replying.
'No I'm trying to get the God of direction to answer me." I told him simply before shutting my eyes again. I heard him chuckle.
"All your going to do is get yourself a meeting with Hades." He told me. I sat up and glanced at him.
"So, you're not mad at me?" I asked him softly.
"Of course I am, but not mad enough to let you become roadkill." He explained while sitting himself down next to me.
"But- Why are you mad at me?" I asked him. Of course I knew, but I wanted to know what it was exactly. I might have a better chance at fixing it that way.
"Well, you did kiss me and then push me away, you asked me to come to dinner and then didn't let me, and you slammed a very hard door in my face. All in about 15 minutes." He told me with a shrug.
"How can I make you not made at me?" I was biting my lip again as I looked at him and he slowly reached over and pulled it out from beneath my teeth.
"You could always kiss me again." He suggested with dark lust filled eyes.
"I hardly know you!" I exclaimed as I pulled away from him. He laughed at me and pulled me back.
'You already did it once." He pointed out. I looked at him and started to lean forward towards his face, our lips almost touched when-
BEEP BEEP!
A loud truck honked from in front of us and we jumped apart and over to the sidewalk. He laughed nervously and ran a hand through his hair. He glanced at me and gave me a tight smile, I just looked away.
"So, um why were you out here anyways?" He asked me. I sighed and spoke without really thinking.
"I was trying to find Seth, but I kinda got lost and-"
"Why the hell were you trying to find Seth?" He interrupted angrily. I looked at him surprised before answering.
"I was going to ask him something." I replied softly. Paul scowled.
"What are you some whore? Going from guy to guy?" He laughed darkly and looked away from me.
"I-" I sighed and shook my head. "I don't have to explain myself to you Paul." I told him with a glare, but he glared right back and I knew I had just made this worse. He walked over to me and grabbed my upper arm roughly.
"You're mine Alex and I don't share." He told me menacingly. I scared now. I had never seen Paul act so... possessive and harsh. His grip on my arm was starting to hurt and I tried to pull away, but he only help on tighter, successfully making me whimper in pain.
"Paul, please stop! You're hurting me!" I cried, my arm would definitely have a bruise. Paul seemed to shake off his anger and he let me go, I immediately backed away from him. He looked at me with guilt and sadness as he reached for me again. Even though every part in my body was telling me to pull away, that he would just hurt me like my dad, but the regret in his eyes made me stay put. My dad never regretted what he did to me. He brushed a hand against my cheek before gently pulling me towards him as he held me.
"I'm so sorry, Alex. I don't know what came over me, please forgive me." He whispered into my ear. This seemed awfully familiar to me.
"Paul, this is the second time in three day's that you've needed to ask for my forgiveness. I'll forgive you this time, but next time... Next time I might not." I whispered back and I felt him nod into my shoulder. I felt him kiss my shoulder softly before her pulled away and gave me a soft smile.
"I promise I wont ever hurt you again." He told me softly and grabbed my hand.
"Come on I'll walk you to Seth's." He started to pull me along, but I stopped.
"I actually don't need to go anymore, but thank you." He sighed and walked over to me. He murmured a soft 'I'm sorry' into my ear before turning and walking away. My feelings for Paul just got a hell of a lot more confusing.
A/N: Okay so that is Chapter five and it was actually kind of hard to write, I feel like this is almost a filler chapter even though it's my longest to date. Anyways they almost kissed again and Paul lost his temper when he got a bit overly jealous of Seth. Tell me what you guy's thought of Paul's POV! It is probably not very good and I'll be honest it was hard because I'm not a guy and therefore I don't know how guy's think, but I like ti enough. Once again I'm sorry for how long this took! I'll try to update faster I promise!
And a big thank you to everyone who reviewed! I got so many on my A/N that I posted and it made me really happy! Anyways please review and keep me motivated!
-Ash