A/N: This came to me as random as I was doing my homework, a certain word I now like came up and I immediately thought "Soundwave would have one." So enjoy trying to find out what word it is, for it will be said in some point of this fiction of the fan (if you want to say fanfiction the long way)!

Disclaimer: Sadly, since the cake is a lie I will never own Transformers…

Soundwave was a strange mech.

This anonymous Decepticon was unknown even to the great warlord, Megatron. Nobody knew much of him, only the fact that he had the disposition similar to that of a rock and he was Megatron's pet. He hid his face behind his mask, and along with it many of his secrets that one can only create conjunctures of. The silent telepath had many stereotypes, some are not as easily dismissed as others; some say he is actually an emotionless drone created by some other sadistic mech, others say he is from another dimension (that theory lasted for quite a while). Nevertheless, Soundwave wasn't a 'people person', as humans call it, and preferred to be left alone no matter the reason, unless it involved Megatron. Soundwave's cassettes on the other hand were a disaster of emotions, from Rumble's and Frenzy's insanity to Ravage's calmness, no emotion wasn't used by the spy's symbiotes, a high contrast to their creator.

Soundwave was the very reason behind the worst mission Knockout ever had.

It all started as a 'normal for Decepticons' kind of day; Knockout doing his job as a medic while trying to gain a higher ranking, Soundwave practically typing his fingers off for some sort of mission, Starscream being as guile as usual, Breakdown drooling over a very busy Airachnid, and Megatron being an evil warlord. The sky was covered in dark clouds that threatened some kind of storm, always preferable weather for the Nemesis so no poor fleshbag dropped dead of a heart attack, and the ship had a hateful aura. The day was perfect, too perfect for Megatron apparently. Ever since he lost interest in what humans call a 'Rubix Cube', he had been glaring at the ceiling and the bright colors of 'the cube of colorful doom.' His aura was like a ship pitching through a relentless storm, so it wasn't surprising that he had quickly changed from angry to completely bored in the few seconds it had took for Soundwave to solve 'the cube of colorful doom'. Speaking of Soundwave, he didn't know a fragging thing about his most loyal member who probably knew more about the warlord than the warlord knew about himself. A rather peculiar idea formed in his sick mind almost instantaneously after he placed 'the colorful cube of doom' in his subspace.

Finally, after several hours of the quiet humming of the Nemesis being the only thing heard, his rumbling voice shattered the tranquility "Knockout, I need to speak to you."

All working members in the room froze to stare at the confident red medic. This was another usual thing, when one was summoned to see lord Megatron, all optics turn on the poor mech or femme whom was summoned. "In a few mom-"

"It is imperative you come here," Megatron interrupted, his red optics practically burning the paint off the medic as the mech he summoned quickly ran to stand next to him on his platform.

"Yes lord Megatron?" Knockout sounded exasperated, he clearly was exhausted since he just ran in from the med bay just moments ago.

"I have an important task for you."

"Is that not the reason you summoned me? Why not send the instructions to me in a message, my lord?"

"Well, the mech I command you to find out more about happens to have the technology to intercept it," Megatron whispered into Knockout's audio receptors, getting so close that the looked like a duo of gossiping femmes. It would've made everybody laugh, that is if Megatron didn't have a big bad aft gun that could shoot you in seconds.

"Soundwa-" Knockout began, but was cut off by a shushing sound from Megatron and a stare from Soundwave. It was surprising how fast the scene turned from gossiping femmes to a data clerk and smart sparkling annoyed by a student who couldn't keep his mouth shut.

"He mustn't know of this," Megatron continued after Soundwave left, now with the air of a secretive kindergartener "I wish to find out more about him; his likes, hates, hobbies, family. You know the usual stuff somebody would know."

"You're STALKING HIM?" Knockout shouted before Megatron could shut the red medic's mouth, thus the duo earned quite a few disturbed glances. "You're stalking him?" Knockout repeated in a low voice.

"No, slag it! I'm just curious about my most loyal and you are most fit for the job," Megatron whispered again, returning to the gossiping femmes' stance, earning even more unwelcome glances that were met by glares of the warlord "Your mission starts immediately! You are dismissed!"

Of course after the unlucky Knockout left the room, a remarkable string of cuss words in four different languages flew from his mouth followed by a hissy fit and him stomping to Soundwave's berthroom. Many helms turned his way, and many who were caught froze to the spot from his horrifying glare and curse words. The red medic was being true to his color and the place where his alt mode originated, flaming red personalities and angry Germans weren't a good combination especially for medics.

Eventually, the German sports car calmed down. Thus he stood silently in front of the looming door to Soundwave's berthroom. Knockout didn't know what to think, he was confused what emotion he should have and what to say to the uncharismatic loyal spy. Why did Soundwave have to be so slagging mysterious? Knockout gently and rhythmically tapped his claws on his helm in thought, the only time he ever thought this hard was when he was deciding which tool he should use next to improve his looks.

"Are you looking for main machine?" a voice shouted from behind the red medic, startling the larger mech from his thoughts. To Knockout's disdain, he squeaked in terror and slammed against the door that leads to Soundwave's room. If the spy didn't know of the red medic's presence before, he certainly did know.

"Y-yes," Knockout stuttered after quickly regaining his high ego. Why did Soundwave's symbiotes have to be just as mysterious as him? After a couple of awkward moments, Knockout managed to say in his normal voice "Who is main machine anyways?"

"Soundwave," the much smaller purple mech, Frenzy, replied happily "He is on the top of the Nemesis. He goes there once every week for several hours to process all the thoughts that have gotten into his processor. I suggest not sneaking up on him, he gets really surprised if you do."

Knockout forced himself not to snicker; a surprised Soundwave must have been quite a sight. The red medic could practically picture the look on the spy's face, that is, if he had one. But why would he be surprised "Why?"

"Thoughts take up most of his controls, including his sensors. Well, that's what he tells me. Anyways, peace," Frenzy waved off Knockout as he returned to doing who-knows-what.

Strange indeed.

Soundwave seemed strangely peaceful, despite the fact that you couldn't see his face. The purple spy had his legs crossed and his helm bent down with the screen off. His arms hung limply by his sides, only the occasional twitch of his claws betrayed the fact that there was still life in the silent being. He was nearly silently humming some kind of Cybertroninan dance-genre song, it was the kind of song popular amongst club-goers and DJ bots back in the golden ages. He faced the horizon from the left side of the ship, completely oblivious to his surroundings.

Not wanting to wait any longer, Knockout walked loudly up to the silent mech, wanting to make his presence known while following Frenzy's advice. The last thing he needed was another mech to take care of along with the possible beating from Megatron. The red medic smiled when the helm looked up slowly in his direction, so things were finally going his way today. Soundwave was already standing at full height by the time Knockout had reached the spy.

"Soundwave, I've been trying to find you!" Knockout began with a cheeky grin. No response from the purple data miner. The red medic grimaced slightly "Lord Megatron requested I see you."

A question mark appeared on the once-blank screen. So the tentacle officer was confused despite the fact that he could easily look into anybody's processor to see what they were thinking. Most would find it strange, and Knockout would too had he been on different circumstances, but now it was more of a nuisance. Knockout x-vented loudly, it was the Cybertronian equivalent of a sigh, Soundwave was just too mysterious to even try to vaguely figure out. "He requested I finish up my 'learning of the ways of others aboard the Nemesis'. You're the last one I chose, it was an accident really. Do you want to hear why?"

A red X replaced the question mark followed by a recording of Megatron saying "Hurry up, I am losing my patience." So Soundwave also had a sense of humor, a very dry one but Knockout has worked with much worse material. Knockout chuckled slightly, he loved puzzles and this one he was more than willing to solve.

"So, when and where shall we discuss this?" Knockout grinned again. Soundwave pulled up a map and clock on his screen, moving the red dot and the hands until they pointed to 'the officer's lounge at 10:00 am the next day.'

"I shall see you then," the two mechs went their separate ways until their 'date.'

"And Soundwave totally agreed to it!" Knockout finished while kicking a rock aside. He was on an energon scouting mission with his mein freund Breakdown. The red medic was more cheerful than his usual disposition at missions such as these.

"And you're glad about it?" Breakdown smiled when he checked his scanner, finally some energon which meant an early return to the Nemesis. The blue medic's assistant's rule was 'whenever Knockout is happy, he is happy.'

Knockout spun around in circles while skipping and laughing with glee, he was happy, too happy. "Yes!" a splat sounded after that.

"Uh-oh, don't look know Knockout, but it seems you pranced in a pile of 'doggy shit', as humans say," Breakdown winced.

"FFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUU- " Knockout shouted.

Meanwhile…

Jack froze "Did you hear that Arcee?"

The blue femme shook her helm, trying to lie to her human partner "Nope."

Soundwave sighed as he took off his face mask, revealing his embarrasing features. His face was unlike most, well, if one considered most to be of the mech population. Instead of having the usual large face, his was unusually small. His optics and lips both strongly represented a femme's. Even his body looked femme-like, the only reason behind his mechly form was the customized armor his father got him.

Scratching his chassis that had been ailing him for the past few weeks, he left to sleep on his berth, completely exhausted from his day's work.

~O.O~

A/N: The end was actually pretty rushed. I was in the mood for humor, I mean, who wouldn't want a few laughs after doing 70 math problems, a semester test, Social Studies stuff, and worrying about projects? Anyways, PRESS THE BUTTON!