Rating: PG-13
Pairings: Steve/Tony, past Steve/Peggy, Howard/Maria.
Universe: AU(Earth-616)
Warning: Slash, M/M,
Word Count: 4,708
Disclaimer: Last time I checked they didn't belong to me.
Summary: For as long as he can remember Christmas with his family has never been something to celebrate, and so Tony spend all the Christmas he can away from home, until a certain blond appears and Tony decide that maybe the Stark's Christmas party is worth the pain.

He wasn't fond of the Christmas festivities, hadn't been since a young age, and after leaving for college he hadn't been home for Christmas even once, yet this year was different he was actually looking forward to the Christmas's dinner with his family. The reason was simple, it was the first Christmas they would spend with the recently found Captain America.

It have been years since the man disappeared and after many unproductive months of searching for the body most people have given up on it, but of course Howard Stark wasn't most people and the man had continued the search even years after the disappearance and when the man's float had finally found the lost airship forty five years after the incident everyone had been surprised. The country celebrated that they had finally found the body of their dear hero, but when they had unfrozen the body and the man had opened his eyes even Howard had been surprised. Everyone rejoiced, many people cried and it was like a party all over the country, to Tony it was purely a miracle.

He had grown reading comics of the man, collecting everything he could, from cards to posters to action figures, and hearing aunt Peggy's stories of the man, not just of the good old captain but of Steve Rogers the man behind the mask, thus when he had heard the news he had been delighted, asking Howard, to the man's annoyance, to be allowed to meet him right away.

The man was even better than he imagined, he was nice to Tony, much like his aunt Peggy and listened patiently when the teen rambled, he laughed at the boy's jokes, not like Howard who usually looked exasperated, and he even complimented Tony when the boy had showed him his report card, something Maria and Howard never did.

That's why it didn't came as a surprise to Tony when he redeveloped his childhood crush on the man, he couldn't help but want to be near him as much as he could and so he found himself spending more and more time at home, he was thankful to Howard for convincing the man of staying at the mansion. Also he took a like on following Steve around the house, of course he did that without him noticing, he blushed like the teenager he was every time he touched him or said something nice to him, moreover to his joy and distress he started having inappropriate dreams with said man and in his eagerness he found himself going back home the same evening that classes ended.

"Mom, dad, Jarvis I'm back!" He yelled while taking off his coat and throwing it to the closet, he smiled openly when he saw Jarvis appeared from a corner and smiled at him.

"Welcome back Master Tony." Tony walked to Jarvis and hugged him with enthusiasm, he always missed Jarvis when he was at college, he missed him much more than he missed his parents, not like his parents missed him anyway.

"Where's everyone?" He let go of Jarvis and the man patted him on the head, smiling warmly at him.

"Mr. Howard and Mrs. Maria are out and Captain Rogers is on the living room." He bit his lips at the last part, trying hard to keep the smile off his face.

"Thanks Jarvis." He hurried to the living room and smiled when he found the blonde watching TV, Steve had taken a like to the TV and it wasn't the first time Tony found him watching it, they had even spent a few evenings watching movies together. "Hey Steve."

The man turned around and looked at Tony from the sofa, he looked surprised for a moment but his surprise was replaced by the warm smile Tony had grown to love over the months of knowing him.

"Hey to you, I didn't expect you home so soon." The man stood from the sofa and walked to Tony, he ruffled Tony's hair affectively when he reached him and Tony blushed, lightly leaning into the man's touch. "How was school?"

"Good, I mean boring and tedious, Mr. Wagner is still being an ass because I know more than him about his class and I got A in all my classes and I…" He trailed off because he realized that he was rambling again, and Steve was smiling at him. "Uh, it was good."

"Good to hear, you want to watch a movie?" He gestured to the TV and Tony didn't even look at the screen to see which movie was playing before he nodded, after all he probably would spent the whole time giving quick glances to Steve instead of watching the movie. "Come."

He returned to his previous sit and Tony followed him sitting beside him, leaving between them enough space for both of them to feel comfortable. The movie was one of those Christmas comedies and like Tony anticipated he spent most time sending quick looks at Steve and wishing to lean closer to the man, to his despair his happy time was short lived as a few minutes before the movie ended Maria and Howard returned home, his mother looked delighted when she saw him, his father just frowned and followed his wife.

"Tony dear when did you return?" His mother smiled at him as she walked inside the living room he smiled back and allowed her to hug him and kiss him on the cheek, she was always like that, threating him sweetly like a doll or a Teddy bear, sometimes it sickened him, sometimes he wanted to yell at her that he wasn't a toy that she could display and buy things to make feel better, but really he preferred her before his dad.

"Just like an hour ago." Behind her was Howard, who was looking from him to Steve with a disapproving gaze and Tony looked aside, feeling like Howard's gaze could see right through him and he feared that the man already knew about his crush.

"Come on dear, you can tell us about school on dinner, I want to show you some things." Maria took his arm and dragged him out of the living room, he looked behind to see Howard and Steve starting a conversation, his dad hadn't even bothered greeting him.

In the end he had been dragged around by Maria who wanted to show him all the clothes and stuff she got him for Christmas and then he had helped Jarvis put the table and organize some things. It wasn't until dinner time that he saw Steve and his dad again, when he arrived at the dining room they were already there, casually talking and laughing, he felt a pang of hurt and jealous, because neither of them would act that calmly and open toward him, not even Steve would just talk to him, usually it was Tony babbling to him, and not to mention Howard who barely managed to go pass greeting him.

He knew his dad was disappointed about him, he didn't know why but the man didn't make an effort to hide it, taking every chance he had to rub it on Tony's face. Sometimes he wondered how Howard and Steve had ended up being friends, not just friends best friends, Howard was on the cold side and Steve was everything but cold, Howard was the one person Tony couldn't stand to be around for more than five minutes and Steve just like Peggy, who was also Howard's best friend, were two of the only three persons that made things be worth it, the last person being Jarvis. Sometimes he wondered if Steve would end up being disappointed of him too, he sat down on his chair suddenly feeling depressed, and he sighed heavily, not feeling like eating anymore.

"What's wrong, Tony?" He looked up from his plate to Steve who was smiling at him. He blushed lightly under his gaze and scratched the back of his head awkwardly, searching frantically in his mind for an excuse, usually no one would ask him if he was alright if it had been Howard alone he would have ignored the sigh.

"I-It's nothing." Both Howard and Steve looked like they didn't believe him and he continued. "I just remembered something from school, yeah something sad and…" He was nervous and if having Steve's gaze fixed on him wasn't enough, Howard glare on him was making him more nervous as the second passed by. "From the literature class, a sad story, you know about something really sad." If he was just lightly blushing before he was furiously blushing now, it seems that all needed to disappear his cleverness and intellect was a really hot and cool blond and his father's glare, because really that was probably the lamest lie he had given in his whole life.

"A sad story about something really sad?" This time it was Howard who asked and his glare had transformed into a look of disbelief accompanied with a raised eyebrow. "And what's the name of this story?" He was at the verge of having a panic attack, because Steve was looking at him just as expectant as his father was and he feared that whatever he might say next would only make things worse.

"Ah, that's the point… my teacher asked me to… write this story for the… " He looked from Steve to Howard in exasperation, fearing that when he finished not only Howard but Steve too would feel disappointed of him. "Uh, New Year's writing festival, yeah and I haven't started it yet, so I was just remembering that." He wasn't even sure if such a thing existed and now both men were looking at him in surprise.

"Oh, I didn't know that you liked writing." Steve said a little too excited. "If you are having troubles with it I might be of help, I'm not exactly a writer but I learned a thing or two in art school." Tony was back to his blush and the goofy smile, even forgetting about Howard's presence and the fact that the story didn't exist.

"I would like that. I mean if you aren't busy that's it." He sounded probably too eager but at the moment he didn't care if Howard noticed his not so little crush on the man, at the moment all he cared for was the fact that Steve was offering to help him.

"Sure, if you want we can go over it after dinner." He couldn't believe his luck, He really couldn't believe that his awful lie had ended in such a great way, he would have Steve as some kind of teacher/counselor for the rest of the night and for that he could learn to write a thousand times if necessary.

Any further conversation died when Maria entered the dining room, she sat next to Howard and they began to eat a few moments later. Maria, Howard and Steve chatted all along the dinner and Tony didn't even bother himself to participate, yet he couldn't help but have this silly grin all the time.

He could hear the fast and steady beat of his own heart and he could feel the warmth bite his cheeks, feeling too self-conscious of the heat emanating from the man a few centimeters behind him. He opened the door to his room, with slightly shaking hands and motioned for the man to enter, his breath getting caught in his throat the moment the man passed by him, for a moment he got lost on the sweet scent coming from the blond.

Silently he cursed his hormones, usually he was much smoother than that, having already created fame for his charm at college but when it came to Steve he was reduced to an inexperienced teenager and he hated it, not only did it make him look silly but it made it easier for Howard to pick on his crush.

"What kind of sad story do you want to write?" His gaze followed the man as he sat on Tony's bed. "Would it be a drama, a tragedy perhaps?" Tony sat on his desk's chair, not thrusting himself as to not jump the man if he sat on the bed.

"I don't particularly like dramas, they are too… sappy, but I like tragedies." Steve's presence was rather distracting and he was having a hard time concentrating on the man's word instead of his lips.

"Then a tragedy is it. Do you have any experience writing tragedies?" Tony shook his head. "You at least know how the structure of a tragedy works?" Tony nodded.

"I read some works about tragedy when I was a kid, I remember some of Aristotle's concepts and most of Nietzsche's and Hegel's." Steve looked surprised and his expression was one of joy.

"Oh really and what kind of tragedy do you like?" He though for a moment, going over all the tragedy novels and poetry he had read on his life.

"Well it's not exactly a tragedy but that would be indeed the romanticist novels, I like how they change the canons imposed at the time and describe the life of the common people, taking special care of the emotions and touching topics that were banned, like the many injustices the people suffered and depicting it like something grotesque. They really get to you and they manage to give a sorrowful and melancholic aura to the stories, I mean you just…" He blushed furiously once again he was babbling at the man, he was about to apologize when he heard the man chuckled.

"You have an interesting opinion there, didn't know you were the type to enjoy literature." Tony smiled at the man's compliment.

"I was kind of a bookworm when I was a kid." He admitted that whiles he usually liked physic and mechanic books as a kid he had enjoyed reading classic literature from time to time.

"You must have been a really cute kid then." The man was really going to be his dead, because one of those days he would just do something stupid and Howard would kill him for corrupting his best friend. "Just so you know I like the Romantic Movement too, especially Turner's watercolors paintings. Do you like other genres apart from tragedy?"

"Yes, Science fiction is my favorite, especially Asimov's work, after all, the guy invented the three laws of robotics and developed many ideas about robotics in a time where the electronic was still a baby. The man was just brilliant." Steve gave him an unsure look.

"I don't think I've ever heard about him." Tony bit his lips, of course Asimov's firsts work was published on 1942 and the man had been on the front line by then.

"Yeah, I'm sorry he started writing around the 40s and he wasn't that popular by then, so of course you wouldn't know him." Steve smiled at him and extended his arm to ruffle Tony's hair.

"Don't apologize, he sounds interesting. Why don't you tell me about his work?" He stared at the man in astonishment, having a hard time believing that the man was real.

When he was a kid he had tried many times to have Howard, Jarvis and Maria listen to his ideas and opinions but Howard was always too busy and Maria and Jarvis could never go in par with his rambling, so he grown frustrated and eventually stopped sharing what he thought with others. But this man who didn't have any relations to Tony apart from being friend with Howard was actually willing to heard him and that moved Tony to the point he had to breath in order to stop himself from sobbing in front of him, up to that point he hadn't know he was broken enough to be shaken by something as simple as having some to heard him.

"Sure… I would be glad to do so." There was something different in him, he could notice it in his own voice, the awkwardness, the nervousness was all gone and all that was left was some kind of gratitude and fondness.

They didn't begin to write the story but they laughed and talked until both of them were too tired to continue. Steve ruffled his hair before leaving and when Tony closed the door he collapsed on the floor, his forehead resting on the cold wood. He wasn't sure if he could still call what he felt for the blond a crush and he felt vulnerable for the first time in a long time.

After many years of spending Christmas away from home he had forgotten why he didn't like the Stark's Christmas party at all. It was always full of annoying people from the high society, which usually walked to Tony just to compare him to his father or to tell him that they were expecting so much from him already, and that's how Tony since the cute age of seven had spent all his Christmas's night, hiding in a corner doing his best to avoid Howard's guests and to his disappointment Steve presence at the party didn't change those facts at all.

The man was being harassed by many of the guest and hadn't had the time to even glance at Tony, so he stood there in the darkest corner he could find, glass of juice in hand, because Jarvis wouldn't allow him to drink anything with alcohol, and stare fixed on the blond.

It was depressing and he had been a fool to think that Steve would spend his time at the party with him, clearly the man had more important things to do than to keep a supposedly genius teen company, at the moment he wished he had stayed at the dorms or accepted Ty's invitation to his house, hearing Ty's father talk about his company and try to convince him of introducing him to Howard was a lot better than sulking at a stupid Christmas party on a day that was supposed to be all happiness, beside he might had gotten laid if he accepted Ty's invitation or if he had stayed at the dorms and that would had keep his mind away from Steve at least for a while.

He touched the bundle on his coat's pocket, feeling a little exasperated, he had spent a whole week trying to find a suitable present for Steve and he had been trying all night to find a proper moment to give it to the man, with no success at all.

It was after a long time that he saw Peggy walking toward Steve, she was holding a gift and she had a warm smile on her face, when the blond noticed her, he dismissed everyone and made his way to her with a smile just as big as the one she was giving him. She kissed him on the cheek and gave him the present, and the blond blushed, enough for Tony to notice from the distance, and hugged her with tenderness. It hit him then, he didn't know how he had missed that before with all the stories Peggy told him when he was a kid and with how often Steve visited Peggy. They were in love with each other.

He felt his heart sank and shatter a little bit more, he sniggered with bitterness at his own foolishness and walked toward the nearest trash can throwing away his glass of juice, for a moment he stared at it considering if he should dispose of his gift for Steve too, but ultimately decided against it and made his way to his room, deciding he had enough of the party.

He stayed on his room reading a book about Quantum Mechanics for the rest of the party, surely no one would have noticed that he was gone, perhaps Jarvis but he wouldn't mind. It wasn't like it was the first time Tony had realized that he couldn't have something he really wanted, contrary to popular believe that happened to him far too often. He would get over it eventually, after all he still could be friends with the man and enjoy of conversations like the one from a few days ago. He continued to tell himself this over and over again but every time he said it he believed it less.

He wasn't selfish enough to try to come between them and he wasn't confident enough to think that the blond would want him in a way remotely near to the way he wanted Peggy. She was great, she was gentle yet fierce, she was beautiful and elegant, and she was everything a man would want. Tony would be a foolish to not notice that she was a great woman and he would be even more foolish to think that he could compete against her, not like he wanted to, he cared a lot about both Steve and Peggy, they deserved each other and even if it killed him he would be happy and wish for their happiness together.

It was around two in the morning that someone knocked at his door. He stared at it for a moment, deciding between faking to be asleep or open it, after all there was a big chance of it being a pissed Howard who decided to lecture him about how impolite it have been for him to left the party.

"Are you awake, Tony?" He almost gasped when the man spoke, it was Steve. He stood from his bed in a hurry and despises the fact that his judgment was telling him to go back to bed and fake to be asleep, he opened the door to meet the man.

"Uh yes, how can I help you?" He looked up from the man's chest, he had a worried look and he pushed Tony aside entering the room without even waiting for Tony to invite him in first.

"Why did you leave the party so early?" He asked when he sat on Tony's bed. Tony closed the door behind him and looked away from the man, fearing that his eyes would give away too much.

"I was tired." He saw the man grab the book he had been reading a moment ago.

"And you were reading at two in the morning because you were tired?" Tony sighed and shook his head.

"I was tired of the people." He moved away from the door and walked toward his coat, feeling too drained to start an argument. he took the gift from its pocket hoping that it would distract Steve from the subject. "Anyways, here I got you a present." He handed Steve the envelopment and the man took it with a smile, he looked away not even wanting to compare the smile he got with the one he had given Peggy.

"Thanks Tony, you didn't have to." He saw the man open the present, revealing the book and the small device like reactor inside it.

"That's Asimov's foundation trilogy, it's my favorite book of Asimov." He gestured to the book, then to the small device like reactor. "And that's a projector, here let me show you how it works." He moved closer to the man and took the device from his hand. He touched a button on its side and a light came out from it to the ceiling. Out of thin air like a nebula the image of a painting appeared, it was landscape made by J.M.W turner. "I put on it images of many painters of the Romanticist Movement, you know you can use it as a night lamp if you want." Or throw it away if you feel like it, he thought that but didn't voice it as he didn't want Steve to see how much he loathed himself at the moment, there was so much his pride could take.

"You made this Tony?" There was something strange on the man's voice but he couldn't bring himself to look up at the man's face, maybe he hadn't liked the gift.

"Yes I did. It's not a big deal I know, but I co-" The man grabbed him by the arm and brought him into a full embrace. Tony was shocked for a moment, but as soon he recovered he hugged the man and burrowed his head on the man's chest, inhaling deeply the man's scent, there was guilt building in his guts but he was selfish enough to take all he could from what the blond offered.

"Thanks, it is beautiful." Steve mumbled on his hair and then he pushed Tony away, he tried hard to cover his disappointed and fixed his stare on the man's chest, knowing that if the man looked at him on the eyes he would know exactly what Tony was feeling.

He had been too busy looking at his chest to notice the hand coming to his chin, Steve lifted his face and he was looking at the man's incredible blue eyes when he closed them and then there were soft lips against his own. It was by far the chastest kiss he had ever received, but it was enough to send Tony to the edge.

"Stop thinking so hard, you are just great." Steve said against his lips, then he pulled back and caressed Tony's cheek making him open his eyes, Steve was smiling at him just as warm as he had been smiling to Peggy.

"I though you and Peggy…" He said biting his lip, not being able to finish that sentence.

"Yes, we did back at the war." His smile widened and he stroked Tony's cheek gently. "She is almost fifty years older than me now. I don't think that would work." He felt kind of stupid now, realizing that in fact Peggy was now much older than him.

"I'm younger than you." He regretted saying that because the moment it left his mouth, Steve looked away with a frown.

"I know, I really do, but I'm not that old you know at least physically, I'm only twenty-six." Tony grabbed the man's shirt and burried his face on his shirt again, not wanting the man to go away because he couldn't keep his mouth shut. Don't leave me, he really wanted to say that but the last thing he wanted now was the man to think he was needy.

"That's not bad, ten years is not bad at all. I mean dad's like twenty years older than mom." He mumbled on the man's chest, he felt the man's strong arm surround him and Steve kissed the top of his head. They stayed like that for a while and when Tony felt confident enough he looked up at the man.

"Do I get another kiss?" He said with a little smirk, feeling a little bit more like himself and Steve chuckled at this.

"You are going to be the reason of my death and Howard is going to be my killer." He answered but leaned down to Kiss Tony nonetheless. When Tony tried to deepen the kiss Steve pulled away and kissed his forehead. "That's as far as you are getting for a while."

"Aw come on, you aren't even the oldest person I have kissed!" Steve looked at him in disbelieve. "Ah, scratch that, let's forget I said that." He burrowed his face on the man's neck and nuzzled it, feeling to contempt to hide it. "I like you and I can't believe this is happening, if this is a dream and I'm asleep please, don't wake me up."

"I like you too and you are not dreaming." He nuzzled Tony's hair and turned him around so that he was resting on his bed. "Merry Christmas Tony." He kissed his forehead and then gave him a peek on the lips. "Now go to sleep." He stood and Tony followed him with his gaze all the way to the door.

"Hey Steve." The man looked back at him with a curious gaze. "Merry Christmas to you too." Steve smiled at him and left the room. Tony smiled to himself, feeling like he could burst out of happiness. This was by far the best Christmas he ever had.