Dear HawkofNavarre, Merry Christmas.

Sincerely, You Don't Know Yet.

Requested pair: Gray x Juvia

Extra criteria: Angst on Gray's part.

I wish I owned Gray and Juvia and any other Fairy Tail character mentioned but alas, I do not. I just own the story here (which doesn't mean much since I don't even own the main characters!). The wonderful, fantastic, marvelous owner of Fairy Tail and all associated things is Hiro Mashima-sensei.

Anyway, Hawk, enjoy. I hope.

Ever since they met, Gray had many thoughts about the blue-haired water mage who often referred to herself by name rather than using 'I' like normal people. The fact that she was a water mage was interesting because fighting her was more challenging than he had really expected it to be. He was an ice mage, she was water; he could just freeze everything she threw at him. Or so he had thought. It turned out to be more difficult than that, and the woman, Juvia, turned out more interesting than he had originally decided.

The next thing that Gray decided was that she was a little like a stalker. For a while he seemed to see her almost everywhere he turned, though when he did a double-take she was always gone. Then her stalking had been helpful when Erza was taken by Sho and Milliana and Wally and Simon when she had protected him inside her own body (now that was weird, like some kind of out-of-body experience or something) and she had joined them when they went to get the ex-quip mage back. It didn't matter that she had been their enemy now, because she'd protected Gray and that helped her on the trust scale.

Not long after, she joined, and Gray decided she herself was a little weird. Always saying 'Juvia' this and 'Juvia' that and never once referring to herself by the usual 'I'. It made her stand out, though, and the ice mage thought that it was what made her fit so well in Fairy Tail. Everyone was unique and they clashed together wonderfully. Well, most of the time.

Now, though, since Christmas was coming up and he was in his element and more comfortable outside than inside, he noticed that she wasn't sneakily hiding close to him like she used to.

And there begins his problem.

Gray was currently sitting out in the middle of a snow-covered street, on the ground, in a pair of cargo pants and a tank. His necklace was gaining a layer of frost, making it glisten wetly in the streetlight's glare, but he didn't really care. The looks of freaked out passersby didn't matter to him. Actually, Gray didn't really notice them because he was so lost in reminiscing. Being out in the cold with little clothing, just like he'd learned under Ul's tutelage, helped him think.

What was he thinking about?

What else?

Juvia.

And she was driving him insane.

The dark-haired ice mage, Gray Fullbuster, had finally realized something that had been glaringly obvious to everyone else. As glaringly noticeable as the sun glancing off of the pure white snow and blinding the unsuspecting hermit as he or she first glances out of their window on a chilly winter morning. Gray prided himself on being at least a little more conscious of the things around him then Natsu, but this…? Something like this had never really occurred to him before. And now that Juvia wasn't stalking him so closely, he was a little freaked out to realize that he missed it.

Sure, when she first called him 'Gray-sama' he'd been wondering what she was on, because he definitely wasn't a rich person and didn't deserve that title. It was flattering and strange all at once, and he didn't really know how to politely ask her to stop calling him that, so he let the title persist. He remembered noticing her blue curls bouncing out of sight behind a pillar whenever he walked by and even remembered the one time he'd spotted her in the bush outside his house. Most people would have drawn the line at that, he realized, but instead he'd sighed and invited her in for tea or something. He still recalled the way her eyes sparkled excitedly as she popped immediately from the bush at the offer, bashfully glancing down.

And damn it all if Gray hadn't just realized how incredibly adorable she'd been back then.

The curls were a bit strange, but even stranger was the shorter haircut after he'd finally gotten used to the curls. He found himself staring at her a few times when she had that haircut before he caught himself. Because damn it, too, that she'd been so good-looking with that haircut.

He kind of regretted the fact that his Edolas counterpart (who was exceedingly strange for wearing like, twelve layers of clothing, in Gray's personal opinion) was head over heels for the Edolas Juvia, because she still had curly hair and it prompted his Juvia to change her hair back. Not that she looked bad like that, but he really liked her shorter hair.

"Shit," Gray grumbled into his hands. Then he held them out to either side and let himself fall to the snow, staring up at the starry sky. Snow continued to fall, flakes landing in his hair and on his nose and everywhere else, but he didn't really care because he'd finally understood. He finally understood that Juvia had always wanted his attention.

Every time she had hung around him, hid nearby, stuttered when she talked to him or fainted when he talked to her or even stripped…she wanted his attention. And he'd been denser than Natsu because he hadn't realized it. Even when she'd fought Meredy on Tenrou Island nine years ago now, she'd been thinking of him. And now that he realized it, he wanted to shoot himself, because damn it all if he wasn't about to lose her to him.

No, not Natsu. Natsu had Lucy. The only other him Gray thought of like that (even though they were actually really close)…was Lyon.

That damn bastard was smooth, that was for sure. Ever since meeting Juvia when the Fairy Tail members from Tenrou Island had come back, Lyon made sure to drop by the guild with gifts for Juvia. He flirted with her, gave her flowers and chocolates and all that shit girls like, and was just…stealing her away. Gray didn't know how else to describe it but it was…horrible. He felt like everything he was had been dragged down the drain and all that was left was an empty shell that was just like the Edolas Gray, minus the clothes.

"Shit," Gray murmured again, still staring up at the sky. He couldn't believe it. "He's going to get the girl, Gray, and you're going to be second best to Lyon again."

Because damn it all if Gray Fullbuster hadn't fallen for Juvia, too.

Since Gray hadn't done anything for her, wouldn't she go to Lyon? Gray hadn't bought her flowers, or chocolates, or a dress or a new hat or a nice necklace because he hadn't realized his own infatuation until just that day. And Lyon had hinted to Gray that he'd given Juvia a pretty pricey necklace for Christmas (three days early, because that had been just earlier in the day), so what chance did the darker-haired man have of winning her over now? She'd waited long enough for him, so she probably wouldn't wait anymore. She'd go for the guy that had actually shown interest, and he'd be left behind.

The ice mage rolled over, face down in the snow, and silently cursed himself (since he tried out loud but ended up almost choking on a mouthful of snow, he opted afterwards to keep his mouth shut). Over and over again, he told himself that he was losing her. He'd lost her.

He'd just plain lost.

To Lyon.

The people passing him by were giving him even stranger looks now, and finally he registered that he was like an oddity in a zoo. That's how they were looking at him. Some freak of nature, laying in the snow and turning blue even though he couldn't really even feel the chill that had all of them bundled up (like Edolas Gray!). He felt put on the spot, isolated…alone. And he knew it wasn't the fact that he was alone on the ground in the middle of the street like some homeless beggar that made him feel isolated–it was the fact that he was so horribly deep in l-o-v-e that he felt so incredibly stupid for never realizing it before.

"Aren't you cold?"

Gray lifted his head to look at the little girl with blonde hair and blue eyes, looking worriedly at him. There were snowflakes in her hair but she didn't seem to mind them much. The two little pink bows tying her hair up in pigtails made him wonder, briefly, if she's what Lucy would have looked like as a child (if, of course, she'd had blue eyes, which the celestial mage most certainly didn't). But at her worried look, Gray sat up and smiled kindly at her (it felt weird).

"I'm fine, I promise," he said, waggling his fingers to prove it. "I'm an ice mage, so I'm used to the cold."

She clapped her hands, giggling, and her breath puffed out in a little cloud of crystallized moisture. She was so adorable it made Gray actually really smile and then wonder where her mother was, because the girl couldn't have been more than four.

"Does that mean you could play in the snow all you wanted and not get sick?" she asked excitedly, standing to her full height (of about three and a half feet) and twirling in a circle.

"Pretty much," Gray nodded to her, "but it takes a long time to get used to being outside."

"I don't care! I'll do it!" she beamed, showing that she was missing her front tooth.

"Alyssa-chan! Juvia was so worried!"

Gray went rigid at the voice.

"Juvi-chan!" the little girl looked behind Gray, still grinning. "I'm going to be a mage like you and Snow-kun! I'm gonna be just like Snow-kun when I grow up so I can play and play and play in the snow all day!"

She pointed at Gray, grinning.

"That's nice, Alyssa-chan," the crunching of the snow was the first thing to alert Gray to how close she was getting to him. "But Alyssa-chan's Mommy wanted Juvia to bring her back after playing for just a little while, so Juvia and Alyssa have to go."

"I didn't know you babysat, Juvia," Gray tilted his head up to look right above him and Juvia let out a little gasp, her breath crystallizing in the air just like the little girl's had. Her cheeks were a rosy pink, and damn it, that made her look great.

"Gray-sama! What are you doing out in the middle of the street?"

"Thinking."

"Sleeping!"

Gray looked at the little girl, then started laughing. He was surprised when Juvia's voice broke in, too. He rather liked the sound of her laughter.

"Sleeping, then," he agreed with the blonde girl.

"Snow-kun should teach me magic sometime!" Alyssa said, beaming at him and pleading him with her big blue eyes. "Pretty, pretty please? I'll be good, I promise! I'll talk to Mommy and Daddy, even!"

"You should get home for tonight," Gray finally supplied, tugging playfully on the left pigtail, "and some other time Juvia-chan can tell me if your parents say it's okay. All right?"

She pouted, but nodded and waved goodbye as she flounced off down the street.

"Gray-sama," Juvia said softly and when he looked up at her, he noticed her eyes were focused on the little girl, ever-watchful, "Thanks for helping Juvia. Alyssa didn't want to go home yet, but Juvia thinks Gray-sama helped."

"It's nothing," Gray waved his hand nonchalantly but why was his heart beating so fast? So he followed up quickly with, "Just make sure you get her home safely and be careful on your way home, too."

"Juvia and Alyssa are neighbors," Juvia smiled as she started to follow after the little girl who was dancing in the snow, "so Juvia will be fine. Thank you, Gray-sama!"

For a few minutes, Gray watched the direction the two had disappeared in, uncertain that the exchange had ever happened. But then, there were Juvia's footprints right next to him in the snow, and that was pretty indisputable evidence. Unless he was hallucinating, which he knew wasn't the case.

Then he realized that she hadn't stuttered at all. It was gradual, but he noticed that she hadn't been stuttering when she talked to him for at least a few weeks now–or had it been longer than that? He hated that he really didn't know.

With a lurch of hope, he realized her cheeks had been flushed the whole time. That was a sign, right? And then he shot his own hopes down by just one glance around him. It was cold outside. People turned red when they were cold. Or blue if they got too cold. But Gray couldn't feel the difference because to him it felt pretty damn nice out. So the cold, and playing in the cold with Alyssa, was probably the reason. She wasn't flushed because of him.

He wished she had been.

"Damn it," he muttered putting his head between his knees as he drowned in his own despair. He was losing her. And he'd just realized that he didn't want to.

Soaked to the bone but not cold in the least, it was eleven at night when Gray thought of something, got up out of the middle of the street, and bolted to Lucy's house. He was afraid of what he might see if he snuck in like he used to since she and Natsu were together now, so he took the stairs three at a time. In his rush he tripped at the top but caught himself on the wall (smacking his head in the process but not really caring) and ran to knock on her door loudly.

"Who is it?" she swung the door open furiously, and Gray could tell she was pissed. Ink was staining the blonde's fingers so he could only guess he'd startled her while she was writing. "Gray! Do you know what time it is?"

She was more menacing than Erza.

"I know, I know, and I'm sorry, Lucy. I'm really sorry. But I need help. I need your help. Please, Lucy. Let me in a minute? Just a minute! I won't sit down or anything to get your sofa or chairs wet just please let me in."

Gray was babbling frantically, and he saw Natsu come groggily into the picture but for once he didn't care and he didn't make some sort of perverted remark. Lucy looked at Gray with a calculating stare, then sighed and stood aside.

"Go ahead and sit down. I'll have Natsu dry it later."

"Thank you, Lucy, thank you so much," Gray said. He could have hugged her if he was in the mood to get into a fight with the groggy dragonslayer but since he wasn't, he just did as she said and came in to sit down. She disappeared into the kitchen as Natsu slumped on one end of the couch that sat across from the chair in which Gray sat.

"What're you doing here, ice bastard?" he mumbled, already half asleep again. Gray just ignored him as Lucy came back in and it was fine that he did because Natsu was already snoring by the time Lucy sat a cup of tea in front of Gray. There were a few ice cubes in it while hers was steaming.

"Ignore him, he's been sleeping all day. The cold gets to him," Lucy glanced at Natsu and rolled her eyes. "Now what's got you all worked up?"

"I–" Gray began, then realized that he didn't know how to start talking so he took an extra large gulp of his chilled tea and tried to organize his thoughts. Lucy was patient, considering how furious she'd been when he knocked (but again, he recalled it was past eleven at night so she had a right).

He took a deep breath.

"I need help getting someone a present."

There, he said it. She raised an eyebrow.

"Girlfriend?"

"Not mine but almost someone else's…?" Gray supplied, disgusted to find a hint of desperation in his voice. She looked at him funny and he started babbling. "I mean, I think she used to like me but then this other guy came in and actually gets her things and notices her and I just realized all of this and I don't want to lose her to him! I don't! I just don't know what to get a girl for Christmas and I want it to be something memorable and–shit, I'm raving like a lunatic!"

Lucy giggled at his plight. Giggled!

"What's so funny?" he demanded indignantly, crossing his arms and huffing. He felt an uncomfortable heat crawl across his cheeks.

"Last minute shopping isn't always the best way to go…" she trailed off.

"I don't care!"

"It would help if I knew who the lucky girl was," Lucy said, winking at him teasingly. Gray glared at her because he knew the blonde was as smart as they come so she probably already knew what he was going through. So he said almost as much.

"You already know, don't you?" he groused.

She clapped excitedly, reminding him of the little blonde girl Juvia had been with earlier. "So it is Juvia, isn't it? Gah, this is so exciting!"

"Yeah, yeah. So will you help me?"

Lucy stopped her flailing and looked at him in curiosity, as if examining him. She nodded to herself, then held up her fingers and started flipping them down one-by-one, as if counting something. Gray wanted to know what she was doing but he decided not to press her since he was the one begging for help at this ungodly hour of the night.

"Well, Gray, the thing is…Juvia's not like most other girls," Lucy began thoughtfully.

"But all the things she gets from Lyon–"

"She accepts them, yes, but isn't that the polite thing to do?" Lucy cut across, then sighed. "I mean, sure, she might like him a little, but I don't think she wants to run off with him or anything."

The thought of Juvia running off with Lyon made Gray want to crawl into his bed at home under layers and layers of covers and just suffocate in the heat and by lack of air. It made him want to rip his hair out, strand by strand, or even have Natsu light him on fire and not put it out. Those thoughts hurt.

"But like I was saying, Gray," Lucy's voice brought him back, "Juvia isn't like other girls. I think she wants something more meaningful and personal than just flowers or chocolates or even the necklace he gave her today. I think she would like something that has some kind of story behind it…you know?"

He thought he did, so he nodded slowly. The blonde sighed.

"I really don't know what else to tell you. I'm sure she'd kill for one of your bracelets or something, but I think she'd like anything you gave her just because it's coming from you."

Gray hadn't heard the last part very well because he'd been struck with an idea.

"Thank you, Lucy!" he jumped up. "Thank you so much!"

And he was gone before she could utter another word.

"Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit!" Gray muttered, pacing out in the street in front of the guild. The Christmas party that Mirajane had surprised everyone with was raging inside, but he didn't have the courage to go put the package that was in his pocket under the tree in there. He couldn't see how she'd like it when Lyon was the one who actually went out and spent money on her gift and actually had money to spend on her. Gray was poor because their team always destroyed things on missions, so he couldn't lavish gifts on her whenever he deemed fit or whenever he wanted to (and oh God did he want to smother her in gifts). She'd choose money over him, wouldn't she?

Something made a loud breaking sound inside the guild, like shattering glass, and it made him jump. Everything was putting him on edge. Every shadow out here in the snow-covered streets was Lyon, waiting to leap out and snatch Juvia out from under Gray's nose and laugh in his face. And that thought was Gray's waking nightmare. He stopped pacing and just looked up as the snow fell again. He was a foot deep in snow but he didn't care and he couldn't really feel it.

Again and again, his waking nightmare ran through his mind.

His back was to the guild and he didn't pay any attention when light spilled out across the street because he was just standing there, staring up at the falling snow and wishing that he wouldn't lose Juvia to Lyon. But the way things were going it looked like he was and he just couldn't stand the thought. It was torture on his mind.

He missed the crunching footsteps in the snow.

"Gray-sama?"

"Shit!" he nearly jumped out of his skin, whirling around to stare at her like she had three heads.

"Juvia is sorry!" she jumped in turn, snatching the hand she'd tentatively placed on his shoulder back as though it had been burned. And Gray cursed himself again, knowing she'd turn and run and he didn't want that.

"No, no, it's fine, Juvia," he tried to make amends hurriedly, unknowingly snatching her hand. "You just scared me, that's all. I was thinking and wasn't expecting someone to come out, so…yeah. I'm sorry, Juvia."

"I-it's fine!"

She stuttered! He felt hope reboot in his chest.

"Was there something you needed?" Gray asked her, releasing her hand (he still hadn't noticed that he'd grabbed it in the first place). He took the moment while she looked down to admire the way the light fell on her blue hair, shining and just making her that much prettier.

Oh, he hated how oblivious he'd been.

"Well, Juvia had a gift for Gray-sama, but Juvia couldn't find him," she said, almost shyly, as she pulled a package out of her coat. She glanced up through her lashes and Gray kind of wished she wouldn't because it made her that much more irresistible, but he took a breath and smiled at her.

"Actually, I have one for you, too."

Her cheeks got distinctly redder as he pulled the small package out of his pocket and offered it to her. They took their respective gifts from each other at the same time, both tentatively but both with small smiles at the other.

"J-Juvia is blushing!" she announced unnecessarily, raising a hand to her cheek. Gray smiled kindly at her and God, he just wanted to kiss her. Was there something wrong with that…?

"Just open it," he motioned her to go ahead, holding her gift to him in the other hand. She opened her mouth and he cut across, "and in case you were going to say something about this"–he waved the present in his hand at her slowly–"I assure you that I'll open it. After you open yours."

Again, her blush deepened and she fiddled nervously with the package.

"O-okay," she said shyly.

Damn, she was so cute when she was all shy like that.

Fumblingly, her chilled fingers pulled the ribbon off and Gray offered to hold it for her. When she smiled slightly at him, her breath crystallized in the air just like it had the other night but he didn't have time to dwell on it as she slid her fingers under the paper and gently pulled it open.

Into her hand fell Gray's necklace. The one he always, always, wore. He waited with bated breath for her reaction, watching her stare at her hand, frozen, before looking slowly up at him. Her dark eyes were disbelieving, her mouth open in a silent 'oh' as her breath once more turned to little tiny crystals in front of her lips. Gray almost couldn't take it. Did she like it or didn't she?

"G-Gray-sama, this is–"

"I want you to have it," he scratched the back of his neck with his free hand, embarrassedly. "I know it's not anything pricey like that thing Lyon got you, and all that, but…well, it means a lot to me. And so do you."

Shit, had he actually just said that?

The color crept into Gray's cheeks but he didn't avert his gaze. The heat in his face was almost unbearable but he resisted the urge to strip just because he knew that stripping wouldn't help this heat. He decided to watch as everything about Juvia's face started to turn red. The necklace still sat in her hand and Gray decided to do something about that so he tucked her gift to him and her ribbon in his pocket and lifted it from the remains of the wrapping paper. Her wide eyes followed his movements as he took the chain and slid it over her head, watching as the cross at the end fell against the gorgeous deep blue of her cocktail dress. It was a good thing she was wearing a coat and boots, because she'd be even colder if she wasn't.

"J-Juvia doesn't know what to s-say," she blushed again, looking down meekly.

"You don't have to say anything," Gray said, "but I do want to ask a favor."

"Anything!" Juvia looked back up quickly, waiting to hear what her 'Gray-sama' had to say.

"Just call me 'Gray' from now on, okay?"

Not for the first time, her mouth opened in a silent 'oh'.

"A-all right, then, G-Gray."

He liked it when she said his name like that. It was new and it was how he had subconsciously wanted her to say his name. Without an undeserved honorific.

"That's more like it!" the dark-haired ice mage beamed at her, though his stomach was still roiling with uncertainty.

"No it's your turn," Juvia said then, businesslike. "Open Juvia's present. It might not be as…as personal as Gray's was, and it can't compare…but you promised."

Gray laughed a little, his breath rising on the air as he pulled her present out of his pocket, handing her the ribbon she'd taken off of his gift to her. He held the present in his hand, feigning examining it in order to look at her determined (yet still flushed) expression. And so he pulled off the plastic stick-on bow (which was ice-blue) and teasingly stuck it on her hair without even thinking. She wasn't wearing one of her hats. She giggled slightly and left it there, urging him to continue with her eyes. So then he slid two fingers under the edge of the paper and ripped up, less refined than she had been.

It was kind of funny that his gift from her was a necklace sort of thing, too. And it was in a cross shape as well, just like his old one. Only it was crystalline and see-through and pleasantly cool to the touch.

"What's this?" he asked curiously, holding it in his palm and feeling the chill radiating from it.

"Juvia thought Gray-sa–um, might like it. It has a charm on it that keeps it cool. Juvia thought it would help keep you cooled down in the summer."

She was fidgeting adorably. And to be honest, the charm could come in handy when it got hot again because Gray really hated the summer. It was fun, but too damn warm outside. And so he smiled at her and held it out to her. Maybe she'd play along with him, just for a little while longer, before telling him that Lyon's gifts were better and leaving him to stand her alone in the snow.

"Would you do the honor?" Gray asked suavely, ducking his head down. He felt heat crawl up his neck and he could see that although the flush had finally left Juvia's cheeks, it was coming back with a vengeance. But she took the necklace from his hand and lifted it over his black hair, following through and shifting it once she had it around his neck. Her hands lingered around his collar bone for a moment, and she smiled tentatively.

Gray then thought to hell with it! and took her hands in both of his. Then thinking differently, he let go of one of them to cup her cheek before tilting her chin up and doing just what he'd wanted to do earlier; kiss her.

He was so glad she didn't faint right then and there. It was a close thing, but he held her up and she blinked once or twice and then she beamed at him, tears in the corners of her eyes, and threw her arms around his neck.

"Merry Christmas, Juvia," Gray said softly into her hair, the plastic stick-on bow scratching his chin.

"Merry Christmas to Gray, too," she said just as softly, pushing back and smiling up at him again.

Without noticing it, their hands linked together and they reentered the guild so Juvia could warm back up (since, of course, her body was actually made of water and Gray didn't want his girlfriend to literally freeze to death).

That was just their first Christmas of many as one of the multiple Fairy Tail couples.

4900 words without Author's Notes and whatever else.

DAMN.

People are gonna know who I am before they're supposed to…

Anyway. Yeah. My lovely HawkofNavarre, I hope you liked it, even though I don't think I got good enough angst on Gray's part.