L.

It's the Dog's fault

Chapter 5

"You…well…it's there because…" Blue eyes opened wide in panic as she stared at the little packet of rat poison Shikamaru held in front of her nose.

"The truth." His dark eyes narrowed in suspicion.

Nervously, Ino pulled herself up so that her back was leaning against the headboard and tucked bits of her long, tangled hair behind her ears. "The rat poison was under my pillow because…I think I saw a rat in here!"

Silence.

With a heavy sigh, Shikamaru slowly sat up on his elbows and stared down at Peanut who was currently sleeping. "Ino…are you trying to poison my dog?" He asked bluntly, his eyes glued to his best friend.

"Wha-no-huh-Shi-WHAT?!" She finally managed to spit out and spun around to face him. "How can you-I would never!"

"You would never?" He finally turned to face her and held up the little packet of poison. "Ino, you never eat chocolate-save for extremely special occasions-you never touched the bottle of anti freeze since it came into this apartment, and you think there's a rat in the room so you put the poison under your pillow?" He raised an eyebrow at her pink face. "Darling…you come screaming at me the second you see and ant crawl in through the balcony doors-did you really think I would believe that pile of shit?" He derided.

Ino sighed and slumped down into the pillows twiddling her thumbs and gnawing on her lower lip. "No-I guess not…" She pouted and allowed a deep feeling of shame to wash over her body. "Did you just figure it out?"

Beside her, Shikamaru sunk back down into the sheets and tossed the packet into the air, then caught it. "No. I thought something was suspicious the second I came home and you were here."

"Hm?" Blue eyes focused on the packet as he tossed it yet again and caught it in mid air.

"You never come home early, even if you are sick. And on the off chance that you were, Sakura didn't call here. Not once."

"So? She could be busy." Ino interjected haughtily.

"True, but she always makes time for you Ino. Especially if you're sick. Even if she's trapped in the emergency room or needed in operation-she would put through at least one call to make sure you're doing alright."

Ino groaned and buried her face in her pillow. He was right. "Why did I think I could outsmart you?" She mumbled.

"Good question." He threw the packet onto the bedside table then wrapped an arm around her slim waist. "Why did you? I am a detective after all."

After a few seconds, he tapped her hipbone. "Ino, really we need to talk about this. Don't go to sleep."

"About what?"

He raised an eyebrow down at the back of her head. "How about the fact that you tried to kill my dog?"

"I didn't try…didn't even give the mutt a bit of chocolate." She mumbled as she rolled over onto her back, ready to listen to his lecture.

"Yes but you had intentions to." He deadpanned.

"He hates me." She sniffed.

"Hates you?"

"Yes. Your dog hates me."

"I think yo-"

"Why else would he shit on my flooring? Or follow me around? Trip me? Put my EXPENSIVE shoes in his mouth? Drool on my Prada? Hm?" Her face flushed pink as she thought of all of Peanut's faults. "Face it Shika-your dog hates me."

Shikamaru heaved a heavy sigh and retracted the hand he had slung over her waist in favor of pillowing his own head. "Ino, Peanut doesn't hate you." He stated coolly.

Blue eyes narrowed at him. "Don't try to mak-"

"He follows you around because he likes you, and once in awhile he might trip you because he's so big and this apartment is kind of small. He misjudges himself." He shrugged and closed his eyes. "About the shoe thing? He's a dog Ino. He can't tell Prada from bedroom shoes-and he's only trying to help you when he picks up one in his mouth."

"And crapping on my flooring?"

Shikamaru sighed and rolled onto his back. "Needs to be trained better…or you could stop yelling at him. Either or."

Ino huffed in annoyance at the very idea of Peanut actually liking her and not plotting her downfall but wisely kept her doubts to herself. Instead, she gently placed her head on her boyfriends shoulder while he rubbed soothing circles onto her tense back.

"Ino, Peanut actually likes you, you know." He mumbled as he kissed the top of her head. "Just give the poor guy a chance will you?"

"Dog. It's a dog." She muttered darkly, her body growing heavy with sleep.

With a sigh, he corrected himself. "Give the dog a chance will you?"

"Fine." She spat out, willing to say anything at that point.

"Good…and don't ever try to poison him again." With that said he settled himself into the sheets; once hand draped around Ino, the other tucked under his head.

It's the Dog's fault ~ End

L.

I hope this at least made you smile.

All constructive and unconstructive criticism welcome.