Without my cool, distant stare, Ciel's tiny little mouth would refuse to open for the delicious meal I had prepared. Without my presence, his reflective eyes would darken, turn murky, and that same mouth would turn down, and his small hands would clasp together, and I would hear his miniscule lungs heave a sigh that my dear young Master should never heave. Our relationship had changed, he was more dependant on me than ever before now that, well….

"Sebastian." Oh, that voice, the authority of a lion in his kitten-like mewl.

"Yes, young Master?" I anticipated a haughty reply, a ridiculous request which I would carry out hastily for that delectable soul of his. I needed that soul, yearned for it in a way I hadn't yearned for anything in too many years that I cared to remember. It was intoxicating, that soul of his. I could almost taste him on my tongue.

"Bring dessert to my study, I'm done." I watched him rise, only half of the supper I had worked so hard on eaten. I dared not frown at the lack of respect, though it would have amused me greatly to tease him about how his lack of height (adorably miniscule as he was) might possibly be correlated to his refusal to eat his dinner and skip directly to dessert.

"Yes, my Lord," I said. "Tonight I'll be serving-"

"I don't care," my Master interrupted. "Just bring it." I smiled to myself, the scent of a determined soul, musky and poignant, wafted towards me.

"Yes, excuse me," I bowed. "I'll bring it up to you shortly." My Master brushed past me, a delicious scent emanating from deep within him. It was pleasing, it was arousing. I smiled, but he didn't notice as he was already out of the dining room. Back to business.

The half-eaten dinner was still spread across the table, still immaculate as ever. But now I had to clean it up, which, honestly, I wasn't looking forward to. "Baldroy! Mei-Rin! Finnian!" I would have them clean this up, I had dessert to attend to. Baldroy was first to enter the dining room, the distinct smell of charcoal clinging to him. Oh, Baldroy, what was I supposed to do with you? I could hear the scrambling of the rest of my staff, but I left it to Baldroy to inform the others. "All you need to do tonight," I started, making sure he understood the concept of 'all,' "is clean up. I have dessert under control. The young Master will be taking it in his study. And with the leftovers? Eat them if you want." I wasn't in the mood of waiting for his reply, the idiosyncrasies of my staff had been going on too long for me to care about them. And for the most part, they all had learned to solve their problems themselves. After the death of, well, never mind. Thankfully, my staff had learned a few things through all these weeks.

The smell of the wild berry tart in the oven was soothing. Despite my lack of literal taste, I was tempted to take a finger-full as I pulled the hot tin out of the oven. The crust was perfectly golden, the syrup from the berries saucy but thickening quickly. It was perfect. I set it on the countertop as I readied the plates, knives, other serving utensils, and various other trinkets. The strainer for the tea, the tongs, the sugar bowl. I choose the blue and white Mason's Willow set, it seemed soothing enough for such a heavy dessert at this hour.

I readied the cart, placing everything neatly where I wanted. Of course, it had to be perfect, but it didn't take me long to organize. It was an obsession really, the perfection I sought out in everything. But, what else could I do? I was parading around as a manservant to a mere child, a thirteen-year-old little boy. Even after years, I couldn't be subdued with just the whims of a child. I knew I was subverting the inevitable, instinctual frenzy that would be the devouring of my Master's soul by occupying my mind with these tedious tasks. But what was I to do? I could easily break the contract, enjoy his soul regardless, but it was a strange predicament I was in. Not only did I want the perfect soul, but I wasn't exactly ready to leave the side of my young Master. He was…interesting, especially during these tumultuous times. He had many things to worry about now, as I did. This waiting was taking a toll on my constitution. I am no saint, and I am not ashamed that I have had many an indecent thought of my Master and I, but I am more ashamed that these thoughts were getting harder and harder to control. It had always been a constant battle, but being within inches of the intoxicating smell of the soul of my prey, well, it was hard to resist. I was torn between wanting that perfect purity he held, the pureness of suffering, and complete corruption. Often I wondered how his soul would taste if I ruined him. What little inflections of flavor I could sprinkle onto him. But, there was no time for my impure thoughts now, I had a tart to serve.

I tried to enjoy the sound of the china clinking against the metal cart, against the flatware, against itself. I tried to find a little hint of joy in my work, but as my mind constantly liked to remind me, I was employed by a little boy, which I had very disturbing (well, to others) thoughts about, with a house-full of idiots. Pessimistic? Why no, just realism I assure you. But let me reassure you that I do not hate my job. No, I have my qualms, but if you take a summary of my week, I thoroughly enjoy myself. I am quite the actor, and my protective nature is perfect for the strange life of the Earl of Phantomhive. It is fitting that I am his butler.

The thick doors to the study greeted me suddenly. I had almost passed them. The polished wood was pleasing to look at, the ornate carved idols, flowers, embellishments and such always pleased me. They had obviously taken a lot of work, a lot of time to make something someone once thought was perfection. Ah, that struggle for perfection! No time to settle my thoughts on that. I knocked lightly and let myself in. "Excuse me, young master" I smiled. "I've brought you a wild-berry tart for dessert, filled with-"

"Sebastian, please." I was dismissed with a wave of my Master's hand, quite a lovely hand.

"Forgive me." I couldn't help but smirk. Master has been quite irritable lately. I couldn't blame him with the recent events, however he refused to talk about it. Sometimes I worried about his internalizations of his problems. Sometimes I wished he had someone else to talk to. However, his confinements in me have been more and more frequent, even if unintentional or almost wordless. He didn't have to say much, he never did, but what he would say would almost always make my desire for him tangible. I wondered if he could feel it.

He was silent as I placed his slice of tart in front of him. I poured him his tea; he took it selfishly but said nothing. His lips curled around the rim of the cup. Pink against white and blue. I pretended not to notice by turning my attention to the lack of light in the room. The sun had just dipped below the horizon, the bursting oranges and reds were fading quickly to my Master's favorite color, the deep blue of a day half finished, a night half started, I could go on, but I digress.

"Oh dear, wouldn't you like a bit more light in here? It's getting dark already." I took his silence as an affirmation, but I had started to light the candles even before I had asked. I could tell he was watching me. What could he possibly want? The silence continued. The last candle lit, I stood in front of him once again. "Do you need anything young Master?" I smiled, curious about the deepening scowl on my Master's face. "Anything at all?"

He scoffed, but didn't answer, picking up his tea again as the rest of his dessert was already gone. I raised an eyebrow, but he didn't look at me. I waited as he sipped his tea, relishing the way the corners of his mouth carefully nestled the edge of the cup between them. The smooth contours of his pale hands. The dark lashes that almost caressed his cheeks. The sharp scent of resentment and a thirst for vengeance in the depths of his soul. "Goodness my Lord, aren't we in a stink tonight." He scoffed again. I didn't have time for his games however, there was still a lot of work to be done around the manor. If he didn't want anything…. "Well, young Master, if you are finished here, I'll let you to your work." He hesitated. Fly caught in web? Yes, indeed.

"Draw me a bath." Was that what all this fuss was about? How childish.

"As you wish." Ciel picked up the book he seemed to have been reading and opened it. I took it as a hint to leave, but I was sure there was a tinge of red on his face. It was perplexing, but as a faint peppery sweetness greeted me, I understood. The exciting scent of puberty. Oh, if only my young Master had a few more friends. My job was going to get a lot more complicated. However, I had my orders.

Finding Mei-Rin on my way back to the kitchen, I instructed her to clean the dishes for me while I went back to attend to my Master. She stuttered as she always did, but was much less clumsy than she had been only a few months ago. It was reassuring, almost.

I drew Ciel's bath quickly, contemplating the perfect water temperature for such a cool night. It was already October, the leaves had already turned and fallen. London was empty, and toy sales were rather slow. Everything was slowing down, and with only months to my Master's birthday, I couldn't help but wonder if he'd want to celebrate it, if he lived that long. I entertained the thought a moment. Was is fathomable to complete our contract in that little amount of time? Doubtful, with the weather soon going to turn for the worst. It would be a slow investigation. Everything would be slow. I sighed.

The faucet sputtered as I turned it off, its last gurgle of hot water rushing out in short spurts. Hmm, well. I went to fetch Ciel. He was still in the study, possibly reading, but as soon as I opened the door he put the book down. What could be so interesting? Unfortunately, my Master was not one to read for pleasure; he didn't have the patience. "Your bath is ready, my Lord." I held the door open as he walked past me. Again, a multitude of scents surrounded me. I sighed to myself, trying to settle down before my thoughts tried to creep out of my hands than to release some kind of frustration. I didn't want to lose myself, though the thought was most alluring.

Ciel's voice quickly rerouted my thoughts. "Are you coming?" He was annoyed, a kind of childish annoyance. I could hear it in his voice that he had had some dialogue with himself while I was gone. I could also hear that it hadn't ended well, and he was angry with himself and transferring it to me. Fodder for teasing later no doubt.

"Of course."

"Then hurry up."

I followed him silently, steeling myself for whatever may come ahead. I had a succinct feeling that my dear Master had a game in mind, and that I was not going to be amused. My feelings were usually correct, and now that I was becoming more and more sure Ciel was going to toy with me, the more irritated I became at the thought of bathing the boy in the first place. Surely, he was old enough to bathe on his own. Regardless, I opened the bathroom door for him, a cloud of steam billowing out sluggishly. He walked in, I closed the door behind me. I removed my tailcoat and gloves then proceeded to roll up my sleeves. My Master had already set his shoes by the door, and was failing miserably at untying the knot around his neck. His favorite blue ribbon. "Let me," I cooed, coming up close to him. I let myself take in the smell of him. "My, my young Master. What would you do without me," I teased as I removed the ribbon from around his neck. I untied his eye patch next, revealing the mark I took so much care to craft into his eye. "You can't even untie a simple knot." Smile.

Ciel avoided my gaze, not interested in a retort to my playful teasing. He frowned, and stood completely still. He had been like this for almost a month now, I should not be so surprised, but even his lack of self-righteousness burdened me. I didn't want him to be like this, almost lifeless, a listless doll. My Master was not going to sit on a shelf. He knew what he needed to do, but I wasn't sure if he was willing to do it. I feared he wanted to keep that soul of his.

I removed his jacket silently, folding it up and placing it on the stool beside the tub. I took to the task of unbuttoning his blouse. The crisp white fabric was still soft against my fingers. The buttons smooth and cool to the touch. However, I much more enjoyed the flushed skin beneath the fabric, the collarbones I was slowly exposing, the soft white flesh tinged pink with what I assumed was heat. And then, the branding scar still pink and fresh-looking despite its years.

My fingers brushed up against the supple flesh of my Master's chest. He shuddered. Yes, he was so soft and receiving. I could do terrible things to that flesh, but I wasn't alone in my thoughts, obvious by the various raised scars across his body. The blouse joined the blazer on the stool, and I knelt so that I could remove his pants.

My Master was no prude, but as I slid his pants down to his ankles, sneaking in a sweet caress of his thigh, he started to shake. I did not look up to him, deciding to torture his psyche a bit more even though I was looking at his socks and not a more intimate area. He seemed distracted, because as I lifted his foot to remove his sock, he almost toppled over, grasping my shoulders quickly, but his little hands were tense. "Please be careful my Lord," I mentioned, removing his other sock. "I wouldn't want you to injure yourself." I smiled at him now as I stood. He looked away, a pout on his tender lips.

"Idiot," he mumbled. He turned away from me and clamored into the tub. I enjoyed the movements of this shoulder blades as he used his arms as braces to step over the edge of the tub. So feline. I busied myself with finding a washcloth and a particularly fragrant soap while my Master relaxed.

I was searching for the shampoo when Ciel finally decided to initiate a conversation with me. I had felt it trembling on his lips for almost two days. "Do you remember the letter I got from Lau a few days ago?"

"Of course my Lord, you were quite furious about its contents."

I had yet to turn around, but I heard Ciel reposition himself. "Yes, well, I've been thinking."

"Very hard I'm sure."

"I finally have a plan to get my revenge."

Now this perked my interest. Revenge? So my little Master had been serious about the claims he had made in a fit of rage only two days ago? Delicious. "Have you now, my Lord. And what would these plans entail?" I turned to look at him, shampoo in the crook of my arm. For a moment, he looked back at me blankly, almost like he had lost himself in a thought. I wondered what was going on in that mind of his, what he could possibly be thinking. I placed myself at the side of the tub, the vacant look on my Master's face fading. For almost a month now he had been vacant. I was ready for him to come back. I began to lather the washcloth after having put the shampoo by the foot of the tub. It had only been a few seconds that Ciel had stopped mid-thought, but I couldn't help but feel a bit concerned. The feeling of the soft cloth against his skin seemed to pull him back.

"Oh, it's surprisingly simple." He continued like nothing had happened. "But, I have a few more plans to finish. But don't worry," my young Master turned his mischievous eyes on me now. "I won't leave you to wait too long." The smirk on his lips reaffirmed my suspicions. My young Master had had a dialogue with himself while I had been gone, and it had not ended well at all. But I was interested in this plan of his, and I only hoped it wouldn't end up being more of an inconvenience to me than him.

"Of course sir," I said, bringing my lips up to his ear. "But please try to keep yourself out of trouble." I reached around to scrub his shoulder. Ciel reached up to stop me, grabbing the cloth from my hand.

"I attract trouble." My young Master began to wash himself. And what an interesting statement; how true it was!

Half my tasks then completed, I picked up the bottle by my foot. I squeezed an ample amount of shampoo onto my hands and began to massage it slowly into Ciel's hair. His habitual tensing of his shoulders did not surprise me. I watched the brand on his back twist as his muscle relaxed. What a shame, to tarnish his perfect skin.

Ciel's hair was very much like silk between my fingers, an unnatural smoothness compared to his hair when dry. Humans; I didn't understand the concept of shampoo honestly. I could have scoffed at the irony of that thought. Considering my employment, I felt the need to retract the thought. And then I heard a sound, a soft hum almost, a contented sigh. I leaned closer to my young Lord, only to find him thoroughly enjoying the massage I was giving his scalp. I was torn about bringing his attention to it. The soft purr that was escaping those barely parted lips was almost too much to stand, but I wanted to hear it. He sounded like a contented kitten, a purr so soft I almost thought he was.

"Are you enjoying this, my Lord?" I smiled beside myself. But Ciel's affirmation surprised me. Admitting to liking physical contact? What had gotten into my Master? But I smiled again, those thoughts I had wished to keep quite surfacing quickly. I leaned back down to whisper in his ear, "do you wish for me to continue?" I wanted to wait for an answer, but something caught my eye. The pulsing of the vein in Ciel's neck intrigued me. Why I'm not sure, but in hindsight bloodlust is surely a trait of mine. I could almost smell the blood rushing there, his flushed skin dilating the vein, bringing it closer to the surface. I wanted to taste it, I was so close.

I think Ciel only hummed in reply. I had forgotten myself. My mouth had already trailed down to the crook of his neck, but I didn't have time to enjoy it as Ciel lurched forward frantically. "What do you think you are doing?"

For a moment, I wasn't sure what I wanted to say. "Forgive me, my Lord. It was an honest accident. I was merely leaning over so that I may reposition my stool closer to the tub, my arms were getting a bit sore. I apologize." I bowed my head for effect, but the spell was broken. Ciel was now on edge.

He didn't seem to believe my reasoning, but as he believed that I would never lie to him, he seemed to let it go. I, of course, was not lying. Much. "Rinse my hair," he snapped. "We're done here."

"As you wish."

I rinsed him, dried him, and dressed him for bed as quickly as I could. I could still feel his soft skin on my lips, just barely, and it was maddening to think about. But I didn't touch him again, very alert to where I was every second. It would be such a waste if my little Master turned out to be afraid of me, afraid of some strange advances from a perverted butler. I smiled as I pulled the sheets up for Ciel, tucking him in softly without a word.

"What are you smiling about," was his question, dripping with suspicion.

"Oh nothing much young Master. I am just wondering about this grand scheme of yours." That was truth, among other things. Ciel gave me a look, proof that he didn't believe me, but he didn't question me further. I did not let my smile fade. "Goodnight, my Lord."

"Goodnight Sebastian."