Summary: It was the best date night Kate had ever had...except this wasn't even supposed to be a date.

Author's Note: This one-shot was inspired by a post I saw on the textsfromcastle Tumblr that read "Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and having sword fights. I think I'm in love." It just seemed like such a Castle and Beckett thing to do, so of course, I had to write about it. I changed the activities a bit, but the general idea still stands. And to whoever thought up that post, you are a genius!

Set sometime later this season.

Disclaimer: Nope, still not mine. And neither is the post I based this off of.

Without a Doubt

Chapter 1

"Hey."

Kate smiled shyly as Castle swung open the door of his loft and stepped back, allowing her inside. It had been a difficult week at the precinct, a case involving a twisted serial killer with a thing for young children, particularly girls. Every crime scene had been gruesome, the bodies bruised and mangled, and to make matters worse, Esposito had very nearly wound up on the wrong side of a bullet when they finally caught up to the guy.

Last night, they had all headed over to the Old Haunt for a few victory drinks. Today, Gates had given the team a well-deserved day off, and Castle had wasted no time in inviting Kate over for dinner. He claimed it was so they could simply enjoy a relaxing evening away from work. What he left unsaid was that he really just did not want to go an entire day without seeing her. Yeah, he was hopeless.

"Hey, yourself," he replied, taking in her jeans and the dark purple sweater that was being revealed as she unbuttoned her coat. He automatically reached out to help her, his fingers running the length of her arms, as she slipped off her shoes. Black flats today, rather than her normal heels.

"Dinner smells good," she commented, hoping to ease the careful awkwardness that seemed to have settled around them. It was just a friendly dinner, and yet the domesticity of the two of them eating a home-cooked meal was adding a more-than-friends vibe to the air.

It's not a date, Kate, she reminded herself. Except it sure felt like a date. She had put a little extra effort into her hair and makeup (though she would never admit that to anyone). It was just the two of them, alone in his loft. They would be having dinner and, because he was Castle, probably wine, too. He had even convinced her to stay for a movie. And they could deny it all they wanted, avoid putting a name to it, but by anyone else's standards, it was a date.

"Spaghetti," Castle replied, gesturing for her to follow him to the kitchen. "It's almost done, I just need to drain the noodles."

Kate shook off her worries and trailed behind him, stopping at the sink to wash her hands. "Anything I can help with?"

Castle gestured over his shoulder with a wooden spoon. "Salad's in the fridge. And whatever you want to drink is fine with me."

While he put the finishing touches on the spaghetti, Kate arranged the salad and an array of dressings on the bar. Castle added the pasta and a basket of warm French bread and soon they were seated at the other end of the bar, enjoying a delicious dinner and a glass of wine.

"How are you...?"

"Are you feeling...?"

Laughter rang out, breaking any lingering tension.

"Go ahead," Kate prompted.

"I was just going to ask if you were feeling better now?"

She shrugged, absently swirled her wine. "Mostly. Those crime scenes are still stuck in my head, though."

He nodded sadly. "Same."

They wound up discussing the case a bit more, touching on the charges that would be filed and whether Kate had finished her paperwork, before changing the subject. Both were eager to erase the entire ordeal from their memories.

Silence fell after a while, though it was not the awkward silence that had blanketed her arrival. No, this one was rather comfortable, simply two people enjoying their meal.

And not-so-sneakily glancing at each other in between bites.

Once their plates were cleaned, Kate helped Castle clean up the kitchen (he very much enjoyed how at home she looked there), then followed him to the living room for a movie.

Castle indicated an enormous collection of DVDs as he turned off the kitchen lights and switched on a lamp for a more mellow ambiance. "So, what do you want to watch?"

Kate shrugged, feeling a bit overwhelmed by the extent of his collection, but mostly just not really caring. She just wanted something, anything, to rid the last week from her memory.

"I don't care, you pick."

It should not have surprised her, when he joined her on the couch a moment later, that he had chosen A Bugs Life.

"Really, Castle?"

He leaned back into the cushions with a contented sigh. "I figured we could both use the cheering up. And who doesn't love this movie?"

Before they had any further chance to discuss the merits of his choice, Castle's phone rang, interrupting the point Kate was forming in her mind.

"Hey, sweetie," he replied, and Kate could instantly tell that it was Alexis. Of course, the greeting had given that away as well, but his whole demeanor changed when he was in father mode. She would never admit it aloud, but that was quite possibly the side of him that she loved the most.

She was so caught up in thoughts about how adorable he was as a father, and the children that she was only recently realizing that she someday wanted, that she did not notice that he had now ended his call and was looking at her strangely.

"Kate?"

"Sorry."

"Are you okay?"

She nodded. "Yeah, yeah, just thinking."

"Are you sure, because you're looking at me like I'm...I don't know..."

Adoring was the best adjective he could find to describe her gaze, but somehow he thought that might be over the line.

She shook her head. "No, just...you're different when you talk to Alexis."

"How?"

"I don't know, it's just...gentler, I guess. It's a side of you I don't see that much. People who only know the public side of you wouldn't guess that you'd rather be at home, playing laser tag with your daughter."

Castle shrugged. "Cocky and wise-ass sells books. Family man doesn't. It is what it is."

"I guess."

"Honestly, there aren't a lot of people in my life around whom I can be myself," he admitted. "That's part of the reason Gina and I divorced. She wanted famous Rick Castle, not Rick Castle the father. And I got sick of pretending."

He ran a tired hand over his eyes as if to wipe away painful memories, and as it dropped to his lap, Kate caught it in hers, lacing their fingers together. Castle followed the path of her hand, his eyes fixing on their interlaced fingers.

"You don't have to pretend with me, Castle."

The graciousness in his eyes was unmistakable. "I know, Kate."

She lifted her free hand to cup his jaw, guiding his eyes to meet hers. Both were stunned by her sudden forwardness, but knowing that he felt comfortable enough to show her the real Rick Castle, hearing his sudden insecurity and pain...she felt bad, knowing that he was so open with her and yet she never returned the favor. Never showed him just how deeply she trusted him. How deeply she loved him.

"You're a good man, Rick."

Castle smiled widely, his features softening. "You've made me a better person, Kate."

Much to her annoyance, she felt the heat rising in her cheeks. Damn this man and his compliments.

"Are you blushing?" he teased gently.

She dropped her hand. "No."

"Liar."

Kate untangled their fingers to pick up the nearest pillow and whack him across the face with it.

"Hey, now," he mock-scolded. "That's no way to treat the man who just fed you."

She hit him again, but he was quicker and snagged it from her, hitting her back.

"Castle!" she scolded, the sound lost behind the pillow that was currently hitting her in the face.

Kate reached behind her for another one and soon their conversation had morphed into a full-fledged pillow fight. They pulled every pillow from the couch and chair in the living room, and at one point, Castle disappeared into his room and returned with an overflowing handful of more pillows.

They ran around the living room, hiding behind couches and chairs and laughing their asses off as they upended every pillow in the room, launching them in each other's direction and occasionally succeeding in sneak-attacking each other from behind.

However, Kate was becoming a bit too confident in her abilities to surprise him, and as she crept around the corner of the couch, Castle jumped out from behind the chair and tackled her onto the sofa. The pillow flew from Kate's hand as she fended off the one he was now hitting her with, and when that one fell to the floor as well, she suddenly realized the position they were in.

She was pinned beneath him, his hips pressed against hers in entirely too intimate a manner. He was staring at her mouth and her eyes were fixed on the nervous bobbing of his Adam's apple.

They froze in unison, their eyes locked, hesitating only briefly before they leaned in, closing the distance between them.

Their lips moved together, giving and taking, just like everything else in their relationship. And when Castle ran his tongue along her bottom lip, probing for entrance, she shuddered against him and granted him access.

They kissed lazily for a couple minutes, tongues tangling and fingers caressing, though both kept their touches relatively chaste. Castle was propped up above her on one elbow, his free hand making its way into her hair. Kate's arms came up to wrap around his neck, teasing the hairs at the nape.

At long last, they separated, and Castle dropped his head onto her shoulder. His movement left her nose buried in the crook of his neck, her breath hot on his skin, doing nothing to calm his racing pulse. He untangled his fingers from her curls and dropped his arm to wrap around her shoulders, pulling their upper bodies closer.

They stayed in that position for a while, recovering, basking in the feeling of finally crossing that line (without the threat of danger this time), and only when Kate felt stable enough to face him did she lift her head.

She felt Castle lift his head as well and forced her racing mind to focus. Her hazel eyes met his warm blue ones, and in their depths, she saw a whirlwind of emotions she was not sure she could put a name to. One was shining over all of the others, though, and that one was unmistakably love. Pure, unbridled love for her.

Before she could speak...though she had no clue what she even planned to say...Castle dropped a quick peck on her lips, effectively silencing her again.

There were no words for what she was feeling right now. Overwhelmed seemed to be the closest adjective, but even that was not enough to describe it. She was happy. Elated, even. She was pretty sure she was trembling slightly. Her heart was going crazy. She felt warm and fuzzy inside, felt so at home wrapped in his arms, being pressed into the couch by his body. And she was so incredibly in love with him that it was almost terrifying.

"Kate..." he said softly, finally, something to break the silence. "Is this..." He trailed off awkwardly, unsure of how to ask what he needed to ask without messing everything up.

"Real? Yes," she replied, following his thoughts, for which he was incredibly thankful.

"Are you...Kate...wow," he stammered, his eyes lighting up with delight and childlike excitement. "Just, wow."

He tightened his grip once again and returned his head to its spot on her shoulder, breathing in her scent as his own washed over her.

Castle dropped a kiss on her temple, his breath fanning out over her ear as he rested his head against her hers. She shivered slightly and Castle lifted his head to look down at her.

"Cold?"

Oh, damn, he had caught on to that.

She looked up. "No."

His self-satisfied grin appeared right away. "Oh really? Then why, my dear Detective, would you be shivering?"

"Fine, maybe I was cold," she lied.

"Right. Which is why this," he leaned down so his breath played across her ear and neck, "is making you shiver again."

Well, crap. Kate thought had always done a fairly good job of hiding how much he affected her, but apparently that only worked outside of a certain proximity.

"I'm...it's..."

Castle once again fixed her with his gaze, mirth in his eyes, eyebrow raised in disbelief, and she felt the urge to slap him. And kiss him.

Oh, this man. This irritating, annoying man, who was having far too much fun teasing her about this. Kate vehemently ignored the voice in her head reminding her that she did not really seem all that upset about his actions. And that she found the smug pride on his face to be kind of adorable.

"Earth to Kate," he called, and she snapped her attention back to the present, completely unaware that she had even spaced out.

"Hmmm?"

"And what exactly is going on in that mind of yours, Detective?" he asked with a smile, his eyes still twinkling mischievously.

"Just thinking," she replied ambiguously, but the way her eyes flicked to his mouth gave her away.

"About kissing your ruggedly handsome partner some more?"

She smacked him upside the head, but smiled as she lifted her head to press her lips to his. She intended the kiss to be brief, just a little tease of what was truly going through her head, but Castle drew her back in, his lips hot and demanding.

And just as Kate was trying to remember why wrapping her legs around his waist and tearing his shirt off would be a bad idea, he broke away. Both were breathing hard, hair disheveled, cheeks pink, and Kate could feel his arousal beginning to press against her hip.

"So, movie?" he asked, hoping he sounded less frazzled than he felt.

Kate sighed in relief. Or frustration. Or maybe both. She was not sure. All she knew was that she was glad Castle had spoken up when he did because if he had not, she certainly would not have stopped them. And though she wanted to take that step so badly, she was still harboring a potentially painful secret, and she knew she had to tell him first.

It would hurt him no matter what, of that she was sure, but when they started this...thing, she wanted it to be done right.

By that logic, she should tell him now...they had just kissed, after all. Very passionately. And maybe it was cowardly, but she was not about to ruin this wonderful evening with heartbreaking information. Not tonight.

"Right, movie," she managed, drawing herself from her thoughts.

He maneuvered off of her, careful not to touch her in any way that would further heighten his arousal. Ah, hell, just being on the same couch as her had that effect. He was done for, and they had not even started the movie yet.

Kate hoped he could see the gratitude in her eyes as she righted herself and slid to the floor, back against the sofa, surrounded by the mess of pillows. After what had just happened, sitting on the couch with him would just be too deliciously tempting.

Castle leaned sideways, switching off the lamp and retrieving the remote, then slid down to sit next to Kate. Their shoulders were brushing only slightly, a kind of sweet torture, teasing them, reminding them of the steps they were not yet ready to take. Not quite.

Castle still could not believe that he had just kissed Kate Beckett. That she had kissed him back. And that she was not running from it. The risk-taking side of him wanted to push a bit further, wanted to pull her into his side, tilt her chin up, and kiss her again.

But the sensible side of him was warning him to take a step back, to let her set the pace. After all, he already knew he was ready for this. He had been waiting on her, and he was going to do this at her pace. If two kisses (two mind-numbingly hot kisses) was all she was ready for tonight, well, he could live with that. It was a very nice step in a very favorable direction.

Kate was not even sure that Castle realized he had finally started the movie. He was clearly lost in thought, completely distracted, and his eyes had been not-so-subtly fixed on her for the better part of the last five minutes, a small smile gracing his expression.

Not that she was faring any better. Her mouth still tingled with the feel of his tongue, the taste of him still lingered on her lips. Add to that the fact that her heart was racing from their most recent encounter on the sofa, and she was sure she was a frazzled, blushing mess.

And if all it took to get her like this was a couple kisses and a rather horizontal embrace, how was she ever going to survive when they...

No. No, Kate. Not going there.

Oh, she wanted to. So badly. But as much as she would have liked to have continued their kiss, to see where things would lead, she was glad they had stopped when they did. Baby steps were fine with her and making out on his couch was a big enough step for one night. They had plenty of time to let things unfold at a slower pace. Especially in light of the secret she was dreading having to reveal to him.

The movie ran its course with neither occupant of the living room paying it any heed. Hell, Kate could not even remember the name of the movie. All she could think about was how warm and comfortable she felt cuddled up against Castle's side, under a blanket, on a fluffy mound of pillows on his living room floor.

Wait, cuddled up with him? Lying down under a blanket? With Castle? When had all of that happened?

Kate lifted her head and looked around. All of the couch cushions were lopsided. There were pillows beneath both of them, pillows surrounding them, and a couple of others haphazardly tossed around the area. It briefly crossed her mind that it was so like Castle to have so many decorated throw pillows around the house.

He was lying on his back, an arm extended beneath her head, and his bicep was currently serving as a rather comfortable pillow. Kate was on her side, one hand twined with his and resting on his chest, one ankle thrown over his. Her nose was buried in the crook of his neck and she could feel his breath on the top of her head.

She was cuddling with Richard Castle, in his living room, and since neither of them had any desire to move, she was going to end up falling asleep in this position.

Castle shifted slightly to grab the remote, turning off the TV and pulling the blanket more tightly around them as he lay back down. He wound up closer to her than before, so that her thighs were now pressed up against the top of his right leg and her left hand was wedged between her chest and his side.

He felt her shift, tensed, thinking she might try to leave. Or at least distance herself a bit.

"Kate."

"Hmmm," she mumbled, her thoughts only semi-coherent.

"Stay. Please."

"Mmkay," she replied sleepily, her body relaxing as she cozied up to him even further.

Castle was sure she would not have agreed had she been fully awake, but he was not going to complain. He would gladly take a beating for it in the morning if it meant that he got to spend the night with Kate Beckett in his arms. In his loft. Snuggled up under the same blankets.

"G'night, love," he murmured, the moniker slipping out before he could stop himself.

She sleepily pressed a kiss to the skin of his shoulder. "Night."

Her last thoughts as she drifted off to sleep was that this was right. They were right. And that in each other's arms was exactly where they belonged.

Thoughts?