So, this is death.

You live destined to die, yet you feel surprised when you feel your life slowly diming.

I twitched when I moved slightly against the icy cold brick wall, the bruises refusing to cooperate. My head hurt, my stomach ached, and it mirrored all over my body. My body, once filled with awesome battle scars, started to look infect, disgusting, and painfully reminding.

Sitting in my cell, I have nothing to do but reflect on my life until death takes me away. Russia soon will be personally escorting me to hell.

No matter how many things he's done to me, I can't let myself make a sound as he slashes, prods, and skewers at me.

Day after day, he comes down at "playtime" (sick bastard) and tortures me until he leaves me almost dead. Everyday.

For the past two days, I can't feel myself in my own skin anymore. It's almost like I'm half way gone and I know it. I almost can't feel him stabbing me anymore. Pain isn't considered pain anymore; I'm just that used to it.

Even though I'm hanging by a thread, I still lay here and think and reflect on my long life. It is when Russia is gone and my only friends is the water dripping from the drain pipe in the corner of my cell located in Russia's basement, is when I can let myself feel pain. Not the wounds, I'm used to those. I recall my experiences and wonder how all of a sudden, I could be gone; and how eventually, everyone forgets about me. I no longer exist and no one will bother to remember the egotistical, self-centered jerk I was.

It is when I think of that is when I realize how I'll be remembered. Will I be remembered for a jerk? A fellow country? A friend? A brother? A decent human? No, probably not the last one.

I've done a lot of things I'm not proud of, who hasn't? When people think of the Awesome Prussia they only think of the 'awesome' part that I indeed call myself. I wonder what they will think when I'm lying in this cool cell, crying because I can't die with the comfort of my brother and my friends (that I could consider enemies) that I've known since I was still a child under my father's care. Will they think I deserve it?

What some of those people didn't know is that I had a soul the whole time. I felt pains and weakness and all those other things that are human. They shun me because of the mask that I made of awesome dust. The only place where I was the pure me is when I was alone or when I wrote in my journals. This is the only place I could be human. Anywhere else, I would be seen as weak and that's something that my pride refuses to take.

These silent walls don't help either. It just causes me strife with the open space and the silence of it all. It causes me to think harder on what my last thought will be or how can I repay for the damage I've done in my life? But mainly, I think about my past and the people in it.

I first think of West, my little bruder. I remember when I saved him out of the rubble and knew that he was my family, the only family member I had then. I raised him like a son, and he was the cutest cubby little thing when he was young! He used to be so happy and asking me to play all the time…what happened? Oh, yeah, he, you know, grew up. He turned out to be one hell of a man, I can tell you that. He has enough guts to stand up to ME and that's saying something! The bond we forged is inseparable. This brings me to my first regret: lying to him. Lying to him all along about who he really was.

I didn't only lie to him. No, I lied to everyone about who he was. Including the one that I knew, had loved him the most and waiting for his return. Still, I kept it secret; West used to be the Holy Roman Empire and I, being humanely awesome, picked him off the battlefield that led him close to death.

I also played a huge role in the lives of Specs and that devil woman. Being in multiple wars against and alongside both of them gave each of us an unbreakable bond that can't be broken. I can only describe that relationship as being a frienemies. Not to mention I caused disruption in their love life from time to time. Kesesese~

Thinking back on those memories now, I laugh remembering my friends. I can only wonder if they would miss me, considering how many times I've annoyed them.

I think of my drinking buddies Antonio and Francis in which I could laugh until I cry with. Those were my friends that I can block out pain with, like an instant cure for just a little while; an escape from the world. With them, it was us against the world; the three musketeers! I hope they will never change. I hope no one changes.

The icy, Russian floor makes goose bumps form all down my spine spread all over my body.

I nearly pissed myself when I heard the basement door open. I knew it, this will be my death. I'm staring death directly in the face and me, Prussia, conqueror of vital regions was scared. I never remember being so afraid in my life. Here I go.

Russia appeared behind the bars; violet eyes gleaming, smile was sickly friendly.

"Prussia…my little Prussia…" Russia began. "I'm sad that you're checking out soon. I thought that your ego would last you a little longer than this."

"N-n-nein, I could last forever…" I mustered the last of my vocal strength; this would be the last lie would ever tell.

"I think we both know that that's a lie little one," Russia smiled as he moved towards the lock of the cage, like I would need a lock anymore, I could hardly move any longer.

The bastard stepped into my cage, his pipe gleaming with the little light the room possessed. Here I go, welcome death.

Russia raised his pipe to strike; I shook violently. Until, I thought of something.

"Wait!" I hoarsely screamed.

Russia, oddly, stopped and looked at me. "You still have hope? I thought I stomped that out of you."

"I- can I have…a… final-l req-quest?" I stuttered from the… cold; yes, the cold.

"A request?" Russia laughed a humorless laugh. "Yes, I suppose. I will humor you out of the goodness of my heart. Tell me what it would be, da?"

My jumbled mind thought of what I could do to send a message to the people I'm leaving behind; the people that I'm giving up on at this moment.

"C-can I have an hour… to send a message to my bruder?"

Russia thought for a moment, slinging his pipe behind his back. "I guess it would be okay as long as you don't mention that I had anything to do with your death. Under the circumstances, I will deliver it to him myself."

I nodded weakly, not knowing how much life was left in me.

Russia went upstairs and brought back down a pen and paper.

The pen had only a sufficient amount of ink in it and the paper on the back had old paper work written in Russian on the back. He smiled at me and he left.

Dear fellow countries, mein bruder, Roderich, Elizabeta, Antonio, Francis, Feliciano,

When you receive this, I'm already gone. From what, I know not. I just want you all to know my thoughts before I go.

To Ludwig, mein bruder, you're the closest I've ever had to a real family. A real family. I raised you as my own blood and I valued you more than I do any other on earth. I couldn't be more proud of how you've grown up into a strong, powerful individual that Vati would value in any of his sons. But, West, you have to loosen up some. Find someone nice to settle down with! I know for a fact that Feliciano has taken a particular liking to you. GO FOR IT! BE HAPPY! My dying wish for you is to be happy because everything else you have going for you. Poor me a beer on my birthday too. Ich liebe Dich.

To Specs, Rods, Priss, Roderich, whatever, I know this may not sound like me, but I've always respected you in a way I would never admit until I face death. I've seen you at your worst moments; you feel like you know a person when you see them at their worst. I also know how you hold it all in and lock it up because you don't want to burden anyone because it's not the "gentleman" type thing to do. You know what? People do care. I may have never said much about this, but I did and still do care. I need my punching bag in good mental health! Now, since, I'm-well, you know; don't hold it in. I know you two are divorced, but Elizabeta still really cares about you. So instead of going to that damned piano, talk to her. You're a human after all.

To Lizzy, Eliza, Elizabeta, Devil Woman, you annoyed the hell out of me and I love you for that. I definitely met my match with arrogance with you. Ever since we were kids, well, I've always had a crush on you. Shocking, right? But who said Awesome couldn't fall in love, huh? I admit, I hated Rod for having you, but a tiny part of me was happy and almost grateful that you were with him. I had many doubts in myself when it came to that and I'm not sure if I could have ever made it last. Anyways, I kinda always thought you hated me, I still regret that I never worked anything out with you and Rod. Anyways, keep smiling and Rods, take that frying pan away and bury it faaaaaaaaaaaar away!

To Antonio, Toni, mi amigo, and Francis, try not to be too sad it's only the two musketeers now! I will miss you guys because you were my brothers from other mothers! My finest moments will always be remembered by you two. All you both need to know is that I'm sorry if I was ever a douche bag while I was drunk… it happens. Spain, make sure to let that angry Italian know that you love him! France, try not to cheat on whoever you settle for…I know, it's hard!

Finally to Feliciano, I haven't told either of you the whole truth. Italy, I know you remember HRE going off to war. And, I know your still waiting for him. What I haven't told you is that he's alive and well and probably right next to you. After France's angry little midget, I think his name started with a N, destroyed what was left of HRE, I went on to battlefield. There, I found a little kid, still alive and breathing, hardly. I took him back to my house and nursed him back to health. He was healthy, but he had no recollection of who he was. I raised him like he was my own son. He became the person who you know as Germany.

Ludwig, I bet you have no idea what's going on, but I'm sorry I never honestly told you about your past. I did know you before I picked up off that battlefield. You were a little empire known as the Holy Roman Empire. You were very shy and usually kept to yourself. Yet, very determined when it came to a fight, some things never change huh? The most important part was that you lived with Roderich and he had a little Italian maid that you had a childhood crush on. That's all I know. The one thing I know for sure though, is that the maid was a little Italy. You have probably had some recollection or feelings I assume. I hope it makes sense now. I'm sorry.

My final message before I leave for good, for all of you fellow countries, is that I'm sorry for anyone that I've hurt mentally. Physical wounds, well intended. It's what we all face in war as countries. We must show no mercy; I know this well. But mental scar, I've learn that they stick and they won't go away, ever. Even in death I'm still plagued. Some advice to all of you, do what you can in life to be happy, don't wait until it's too late. So please, when my time comes…please forget the wrong that I've done. Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed because I can't find any myself. Don't resent me, I ask you all please. When you're feeling empty, keep me in your memory for the good i've done, I swear, some exist. Please, leave out all the rest.

Leave out all the r-

I stopped writing cold when I felt a presence behind me. A swift blow to the head ended it all.

Blood of a nation soaks the earth, never to return.