The only

The first thought Nick had when he woke up was, It's Jeff's birthday. A year ago today, Jeff had admitted to Nick that horrible thing that happened to him. A year ago today, Nick told Jeff that he loved him. A year ago today, Jeff said he loved him back. In reality, the 'I love yous' exchanged weren't that of romance but of a state of actual being, but regardless, they had said the words and they had been kept true, much like a promise held between the two.

Nick wondered if Jeff was still keeping the promise—Nick kept his very much.

In fact, Nick was even more sure that he loved Jeff than he ever had before. He wasn't quite sure what made him think this, especially because he'd been feeling a hatred towards him in the past weeks he'd been gone. Nick still hated Jeff, but he missed him more. Especially today. He wondered how Jeff was feeling. Was he happy? Did he have a day planned with fun activities? Was he thinking about last year? Was he thinking about Nick? Was he missing him, too?

There was a tap at Nick's door and he took a deep breath. He wasn't sure who was on the other side and he figured if he'd ignored it the person would go away, but alas, Josh wasn't one to give up so easily. The taller boy, who had a muscular build and had a tendency to wear socks that were mismatched, entered Nick's room, wearing a pair of basketball shorts and the same Ohio State. He wore no shoes and Nick smirked at his navy blue sock on his right foot and the yellow one on his left.

"I knew you were awake," Josh stated, sounding proud of himself.

"What if I had been masturbating?" Nick retorted.

Josh shrugged. "Do you not remember when you were thirteen? Been there. Seen that."

"At least it makes up for when I walked in on you having sex with that one girl. Tessa?"

"Tessa! Now there's a name I haven't heard in ages!" Josh smiled to himself and walked farther into Nick's room, picking up random things and inspecting them with a curious expression. Nick watched him with a matching curiosity, wondering what could possibly be going on in his big brother's head.

"What are you doing here? School isn't over yet, is it?"

Josh set down a Warbler pin, smiling at old memories. Josh had been a Warbler when he went to Dalton, however he quit months later. He was more into girls than singing. "That's what I want to talk to you about. Why don't you come downstairs for breakfast?"

"I can't," Nick told him. "Mom will be there and I'll probably kill her."

Josh snorted. "Humor me, please? It's really important."

Nick rolled his eyes but smiled, finally getting out of bed since he'd woken up twenty minutes ago. He went the bathroom quickly and made his way downstairs, seeing his family already at the table. Robby was sitting next to Josh, staring at him with adoration. It made sense—Josh was a much cooler big brother than Nick was. Patrick, however, eyed Josh suspiciously, mostly because the last time he'd seen him he was one. Patrick was three now and did not remember his eldest brother. Nick sat next to Patrick and glared at his mother, who glared back.

"Now that everyone is here," Josh started, setting his glass of orange juice down, "I have some big news. As you know, I've found myself a girlfriend at Oxford. Her name is Sophia, she's blonde and has the biggest blue eyes you'll ever see. She's smart and wonderful, and as of last week, my fiancée."

"Congrats!" Larry, their dad, shouted, smiling widely.

Nick smiled at his brother, completely excited about the news. He shared his smile with various members of the family, including his mother. He was shocked to see her smile so hugely. Usually she'd make a soft grin, but it would never reach her eyes. You could tell she was beyond happy now, a slight look of what could be tears developing. She shot up from the table and went over to hug Josh. He got up as well and accepted it.

"I'm so happy!" she said, pulling away from him. "When do we get to meet her? When is the wedding? Let me plan it, please! I promise to make it good. Your father and I will pay for everything. Oh, wow!"

Josh laughed. "Of course, of course. Sophie should be here later today. It took her awhile to get her passport. And we haven't exactly set a date, but soon. Like, really soon. I can't go another second without her not being my wife."

Their mother gushed over it all, rushing to the phone to call family and friends about it. Josh smiled as he ate, answering questions asked by various members of the breakfast table. Nick had little, only curious as to what type of person she was. Josh gladly shared all he knew and was constantly looking at his cell phone, waiting for her to call and say she was at the airport. After a while, Nick wandered back into his room and got ready for the day, quite excited to meet his soon to be sister-in-law.

His phone rang suddenly, though. Sebastian's name appeared on the screen and Nick answered it.

"Hello?" he greeted.

"I'm sorry," Sebastian breathed. "About last night. About ditching you at the dance. I just had to...get out of there."

"I get it. It's okay."

"It's not, though. That was a real dick move of me and I'm seriously hating myself about it."

Nick frowned. "Are you okay, Seb? You don't usually care unless you're inhibited."

"Am I ever okay? That was a stupid question. Ugh, damnit. Can I come over?"

"Uh, sure. But I'm not sure for how long. Family stuff is going on."

"I'll be there in a few minutes."

"Kay."

The two hung up and Nick scratched the back of his head, unaware of what to do about Sebastian. It was clear that Sebastian was being swallowed by some internal turmoil but it was hard to do anything about it, especially when Sebastian's so good at making walls. However, Nick had seemed pretty good and getting over them, which made him worry sometimes. Was it because he and Sebastian were much more similar than either would have thought? Or was it that Nick had gained Sebastian's trust, being the only person to not turn his back on him no matter the wrongs he made?

Not two minutes later, Sebastian was at his house, ringing the doorbell. Nick hurried out of his room, not making it in time to answer the door. Josh stood in front of Sebastian, frowning a bit.

"I thought you were someone else," Josh managed to say.

Sebastian said nothing, he just looked so...lost. Nick froze behind Josh, shocked at what he saw. Sebastian was wearing random pieces from his tux: his dress shirt, his dress pants and dress shoes. His white dress shirt was undone, revealing a plain white t-shirt beneath. The circles around his eyes were dark and puffy, his blue-green eyes surrounded by a sea of pink. His arms were crossed against his chest and he looked uncomfortable.

"Hi," Nick said cautiously, walking in front of Josh.

"Hi," Sebastian replied, his voice raw.

Nick reached out and grabbed Sebastian's wrist, pulling him inside the house. The two went past Josh, who was giving them both a questioning glance as they headed upstairs. Back in his room, with the door shut and a sense of security, Sebastian pulled Nick into him and kissed him hard on the lips.

Nick wanted to kiss him back, wanted to do many things, but he knew that neither of them were emotionally stable enough to continue. He pulled away from Sebastian unwillingly and tried to get the taller boy to look at him, but Sebastian was hurt from the rejection and refused to open his eyes.

"I want to, Seb," Nick started to explain, but stopped himself when Sebastian opened his eyes and glared back.

Sebastian walked past Nick and sat on his bed, staring down at his hands that were trembling slightly. Nick sat in the computer chair across from him, watching him. Eventually Sebastian decided to speak.

"What is this, Nick?"

"I don't know."

"Do you want this to be anything?"

"I don't know.

"What do you know?" Sebastian growled, glaring again.

Nick sighed. "I know that I like you, a lot. But I know that I love Jeff. And I know that you're lonely, and I know that I'm scared."

"Of what?"

"You."

Sebastian's eyes widened. "Me?"

"You hurt people, Sebastian, and not because you're a bad person but because you're scared they're going to hurt you first. And you're not willing to take that chance."

"But I am...I'm willing to take it with you."

Nick's stomach sank as he saw tears begin to form in Sebastian's eyes. "Why me?"

"I don't know," was Sebastian's reply.

"I do," Nick smiled. "It's because you trust me. It's because you know that I'd never get too close to you because I love someone else. It's because I'm not afraid to tell you the truth. It's because I would never hurt you."

"Then be with me."

"But I'm not a perfect person. And I will hurt you, Seb. I'm hurting you now and I can't fix you."

Sebastian let out a single sob, tears falling from his face. "He left you, Nick! He broke your heart and you need to move on! I see it in your eyes, the pain because of it. But you and me, we get it. We know how the world works and we can make each other better again. Fuck them all! It could be just you and me, and we wouldn't have to worry about doing bad things to each other."

Nick could feel his own eyes water but he was beyond crying. He'd spent a good hour last night sobbing into his pillow. And he felt like shit for not crying right now.

"I can't," Nick told him, his voice breaking slightly.

Sebastian's bottom lip quivered and his face grew a slight shade of red. "Please, Nick, please. You're the only person I have. Don't, don't, don't." Sebastian was shaking his head, as if it would make everything alright again.

"I can't," Nick said again, whispering it forcefully. He walked over towards Sebastian and put his right hand on his cheek, cradling it. He felt Sebastian's tears splash onto the flesh there and it was then that Nick realized that it wasn't everyone else he hated—it was himself. Nick came to a conclusion that he was the worst human being ever and he despised himself so entirely that in that moment, he was sure he would cry.

Nick put his forehead against Sebastian's and gazed at the wet eyelashes that stuck to the fiery cheeks. "I'm so fucking sorry."

Sebastian let out a deep breath and opened his eyes, his crying halting immediately as he pushed Nick gently away. He stood up from the bed and grabbed the back of Nick's neck forcefully, pulling the other boy in for a kiss that wasn't entirely unwanted. But this time, Nick didn't enjoy it. There was nothing there except the taste of salt water and heartbreak and Nick knew he'd never forget it.

Without another word or glance, Sebastian left Nick's room and inevitably his house. Nick stood in the middle of his room, touching his lips as he tried to sort out his feelings. But there were too many of them and he couldn't wrap his head around anything. His mother, however, entered his room and a feeling came out.

"Why did you hide my acceptance letter?"

She pursed her lips and crossed her arms. "I don't like that boy, Nicholas. I've heard things about him and they are very discouraging. I thought I raised you better than to be friends with someone so negative?"

"Don't change the subject! Why did you do it?"

"Because you're so much better than you give yourself credit for!" she yelled. Nick rarely heard his mother shout, so he was rather frightened to hear how loud her voice could get. "You're a talented, smart, and beautiful boy. You're my son and I can't stand to watch you throw your life away! You want to be a grown up? Do you really want that? What has it gotten you so far? A broken heart? An anger towards the world? You think that by running away and changing your life it will fix everything? I have news for you; it won't. You can avoid them all you like but the problems aren't caused by everyone else. These are your problems. Run away from them and they'll only catch up faster, and when they do, things will be worse."

Nick knew she was right. He'd been thinking the same thing and it sort of sucked to hear them aloud. It was like now that they were out in the open there was no possible way for him to pretend anymore. How would he be able to look at himself in the mirror without wanting to cause physical pain to the reflection?

"But what would hiding the letter have done, Mom?" Nick heard himself ask.

"I guess I have two theories about that. The first being that had you not gotten it, you would have eventually gone to a better college. The second is that had you not gotten it, maybe I'd feel better about knowing that my baby boy would still be my baby boy."

Nick smiled regardless to how shitty he felt. "I do have to grow up sometime."

She nodded. "I know, and that's why I'm glad you got accepted. After seeing you with Josh last night and this morning, seeing how much you're just like him, well, it makes me less scared."

"It's Jeff's birthday," Nick admitted.

"I know. Erica says that he misses you."

Nick's heart hurt. "Has she gone to see him yet?"

Holly shook her head. "No, sweetie."

"She should."

Holly leaned forward and kissed her son on the cheek, no doubt leaving a red lip mark to prove it. She ran her head across his forehead, sweeping back the hair there.

"We'll have to get you a haircut before the wedding. Especially if you're going to be the Best Man."

Nick's jaw dropped. "What?"

"Whoops, I wasn't supposed to say anything." She winked at him and left his room, heading back to her study where the sound of a phone ringing could be heard.

Nick went downstairs to find Josh to interrogate him, but he was nowhere to be found. However, Nick was missing his keys so he figured Josh had gone to the airport to get Sophie. He headed back up to his room and started on some homework, wanting nothing but to get his mind off of everything.

-:-

That night the family sat around the dinner table, everyone gushing over Sophie who'd turned out to be way cooler than Josh had described. Robby had obviously developed a crush and Nick caught him staring at her boobs constantly, having to kick him under the table to bring him back to the real world. Holly asked most the questions, trying to make sure that the blonde-bombshell was exactly what she'd expect in a daughter-in-law. So far, Sophie seemed to be passing all her tests.

As the table was starting to grow bare, Sophie turned her attention to Nick and smiled widely at him.

"So Nick," she said, her British tone making everything so much more awesome. "Josh tells me that you've gotten into Ohio State. I'm so glad to hear it!"

Nick blushed. "Thanks."

"Also that you've got a boyfriend?" Josh coughed on his roast beef and quickly whispered to her the news. Her face fell and she gave Nick a sympathetic look. "Plenty of fish in the sea. And the world is mostly covered in water, so I say the odds are in your favor."

It was the first time someone hadn't been upset about him and Jeff not being together anymore. It was a fresh of breath air and Nick decided that he loved her.

The had pie for dessert and laughed at the things Sophie said, describing how things were said in her country and how confusing America was. She complained of the school system and the names of certain foods, but she was happy to be here.

Nick had talked to Josh about the news their mother shared, and Josh asked Nick if he would be his Best Man. Of course Nick said yes, a little unsure as to why one of Josh's friends weren't offered the position.

"Because you're my best man," Josh had told him, flicking a spoonful of whip cream at Nick's face. Nick smiled and wiped a napkin at his nose, mouthing a 'thank you' to Josh.

-:-

Nick heard Jeff sing for the first time since everything went down ten days after his birthday.

Nick had been on Facebook, slowly reconnecting with the people he'd began to push out of his life. He'd even apologized to Kurt and invited both him and Blaine to the wedding. Kurt had responded that he was already going as Blaine's date because Blaine had been invited by Josh, who happened to be good friends with Blaine's older brother Cooper.

"But if you convince your mother to let me help, I just might forgive you," Kurt said playfully.

To say the least, Nick all but got on his hands and knees to get his mother to let Kurt help. Their friendship was patched up once again, and Nick was thankful that Kurt sucked at holding grudges.

So their poke-war on Facebook was restored and Nick continued to check up on his friends. He had to go to Jeff's wall to see the video that had been posted because Nick's timeline was stupid and didn't like to show posts a lot of the time.

The status about the video read: where I'm at right now. He made sure his door was shot before he hit play, his hands sweating and his heart beating fast as he watched Jeff on the screen.

"I literally spent hours getting this right, and I've done a hundred takes because I kept messing up. I had to sleep an entire day before I could do anything. This is attempt number...uh, I don't know." Jeff looked the same. It made Nick happy, except that there was still a slight sadness to his features. "Anyway, here we go...'Little Hell' by Colour and City."

Jeff positioned a guitar on his lap and stroked a few chords before it became an actual song. Nick's eyes were locked on the screen, unwilling to look away at Jeff's face.

"What if I can't be all that you need me to be?/We've got a good thing going, we have some promises to keep/But my addiction, it can be such a detriment/Please believe in this my dear/I am more than penitent."

Dear God, Nick thought to himself. I miss him so fucking much.

"What if everything's just the way that it will be?/Could it be that I am meant to cause you all this grief?/my warships a-lying off the coast of your delicate heart/and my aim is steady and true as it's been from the start."

"There's a degree of difficulty in dealing with me/from my haunted past to my daunting task of living through memories/if we could just hang a mirror on the bedroom wall/stare into the past and forget it all."

There was a few things that Nick had learned about Jeff over the years. Yes, Jeff was passionate about music and yes, Jeff wanted music in his life all the time. But Jeff often hid how good he was. There was a reason why he never got all those solos the many times he auditioned for the Warblers—it was because he sang songs he didn't connect with. But when he did connect to a song, it was like you could feel it personally. His voice was so strong and his heart showed and it gave you goosebumps.

Nick had goosebumps and he craved for a warmth that only Jeff could give him.

"So when we leave it'll be a quick midnight escape/we'll disconnect ourselves from all of yesterday/i'll dig for water and fashion, our very own wishing well/then we'll throw our coins down, hoping to rid us of this little hell."

The brunette watched intently, his arms crossed tightly as he bit the inside of his cheek.

Why was it always music that told the truth?

-:-

The wedding was set at the end of the May. Nick had a week of school left and was currently enjoying a homeworkless weekend. However, his house was full of relatives; cousins and aunts and uncles and grandparents. Not to mention Sophie's small family that consisted of her two older sisters who were married with kids (Emma and Jack had a son Patrick's age named Calvin, and Lexie and Robert had two twin girls named Lizzie and Rachel).

It was hectic and loud and Nick shared his room with his sixteen year old cousin Ashley who was having a goth phase. She was nice, though. She and Nick had always managed to get along. Though, she was always in his room and he often wished he could have a little privacy.

Kurt was over daily, mostly when school ended. He was stressed, mostly because he was waiting to hear back from NYADA. Nick was constantly telling Kurt that he was going to get in but Kurt waved him away and bickered with Nick's mom about the florals.

When Nick felt like he was suffocating, he'd take a walk to the park a few neighborhoods there. And like always, Sebastian was there, waiting for him.

It had taken them awhile to start talking again, but Nick was adamant in making sure that Sebastian knew that Nick wanted to be in his life, just not a love interest. Sebastian had to warm up to the idea, but eventually he settled being friends and the two would hang out in the park to have a neutral place to keep things from getting t0o intense.

"You're still coming, right?" Nick asked him as the two swung on the metal swingset.

Sebastian shrugged. "Your mom thinks I'm a skank so I'dunno."

Nick rolled his eyes. "That's because she likes to listen to gossip and thinks the worst about everyone. You should see how she is with Kurt. It's like he's literally going to touch things and they'll turn into rainbows and unicorns and dildos."

"Hmm, maybe I like her after all."

"You should come. For me. Please?" Nick gave him the puppy-dog look and Sebastian gave him the bird, which he accepted as a yes.

-:-

Nick was wrong. Sebastian didn't show up at the wedding.

Nick texted him repeatedly, sitting in an adjacent room meer feet away from the altar where his brother was minutes away from marrying Sophie.

Josh was pacing the room, making the rest of the groomsmen feel claustrophobic. Nick watched his brother with raised eyebrows, hoping to God that if he ever got married he wouldn't be this nervous.

"What are you freaking out about?" Cooper asked, still being preoccupied with his hair. There was no mirror, though, so he was actually making it much worse. No one said anything.

"What if she gets cold feet? Or what if someone objects? What if the priest has a heart attack?" He stopped pacing and looked at Nick. "It's not even legal for my little brother to get married. This isn't fair."

Nick smiled. "Josh, don't worry about me. And there is no way in hell that Sophie is going to get cold feet. No one will object, either. You two are a match made in heaven and you need to take a deep breath, okay?"

Josh took a deep breath and let it out in a spurt. "But someone might die."

The room burst out in laughter, even though Josh was being sincere. However, they were told it was time and the group of men made their way to the altar and lined up in correspondence. Cooper stood behind Nick, and Don stood behind Cooper, and finally Ian was last, his red hair extra red today. Josh was saying a pray quietly to himself and Nick laughed at this, not helping but to look out at everyone who was sitting.

And low and behold there sat Jeff, looking straight at him, a quirk to his lips. Nick's heart quickened so fast that he thought he was going to pass out but he managed to get ahold of himself just as the infamous song that introduced to the bride began. He kept his attention to the back of his brother's head as he tried to gather himself.

Today isn't about you, Nick told himself, taking deep breaths. This is Josh's day. Get a grip.

Nick managed to pay attention to what the priest was saying and smiled widely as the vows were exchanged. He couldn't see his brother's face, but the way that Sophie was looking at Josh Nick knew that his brother looked the same way—like nothing else mattered in the world.

Up next was the reception, and as hard as he tried (which wasn't very hard at all), there was no avoiding Jeff.

Nick had managed to keep a good distance away, talking to various family members, but the two were always in eyesight and eventually there was no one left to talk to but each other. From across the large ballroom they stared, their eyes stuck on each other. Jeff motioned to the exit with his head and Nick nodded in response, picking up his feet to follow Jeff outside.

The sun was setting and it was warm out. It was awfully quiet, only the sounds of the music from inside being heard. Jeff walked away from the building, heading towards a wooden bench near the parking lot. Nick joined him, sitting as far away as he could.

"Sophie's nice," Jeff noted.

"I love her," Nick replied.

A minute passed.

"How are you?" Jeff asked.

"Better," Nick told him. "You?"

"Same—now that I've seen you."

"Don't," Nick warned. "Not here."

"Don't pretend that you haven't missed me, too."

More than anything, Nick thought but didn't say. He wanted to say it. "Now's not the time, Jeff."

"Then when? After I go back to California? How long am I going to have to wait for you to talk to me again? It's not fair, Nick."

"And you leaving me, was that fair?" Nick spat back.

"You could have come with me!"

Nick gauffed. "You knew that I was in no place to leave with you. I don't even know why you asked me. It was stupid of you."

"Fine, you're right. But you didn't have to dump me. We could have worked something out."

Nick knew he was right so he said nothing.

Jeff let out an audible sigh and turned to look at Nick. Nick refused to make eye contact so he stared at an ant on the ground. It was carrying a crumb and heading from the building. As Jeff continued to gaze at him, Nick felt his skin flush.

"It happened so fast, didn't it?" Jeff asked. Nick wasn't sure what he was talking about. "I look back and I think of us and what we could have been...what we should have been. But it didn't happen. I don't know why and I want to blame myself but I know for a fact that I didn't do this—I didn't destroy us. I wanted it to work but I let you go because you thought that this was just a phase, a thing that wouldn't be worth your time. I'm sorry to disappoint you, Nick, but sometimes we do things that get us nowhere but they're real and they're amazing and they're something that make us happy for once in our damn lives. We had that, we did, but you...I...we gave up on it. And it breaks my heart. It breaks my heart to think of where we would be right now if neither of us had given up."

"I'm sorry," Nick replied, feeling like shit once again. "But I got tired of it."

"Tired of what?"

"Of not knowing if I could make life for you better again."

Jeff smiled despite himself and went for Nick's hand. Nick moved it away and set it on his lap. Jeff frowned at this and stared back at Nick.

"You want to fix me, but sometimes things need to stay broken."

Nick shook his head. "I don't believe that."

"Because you don't know what it's like!" Jeff was starting to get angry now, his eyes glowing red slightly. "You have no idea what I've been through. What I'm still going through. Drew did something that is unfixable and you just need to accept that."

Nick shook his head again. "I can't."

Jeff's eyes lit up. "You feel guilty. You stupid mother fucker."

That was enough to make Nick go undone. Nick tried to hold back the tears but they were hot and bursting and a sob was making its way from his chest. Jeff immediately lunged for Nick, pulling him into his arms. Nick shoved his face into Jeff's shoulder and everything was released. The sobs were muffled and the tears melted into Jeff's suit jacket.

Jeff was right. Nick did feel guilty. He felt guilty about Drew and about Jeff and about what had happened to Jeff.

How was he supposed to be happy when his best friend, the person he loved most, had been violated in such a horrible way? How was he supposed to act like the only way to go was up when it was obvious that Jeff had been fucked over. How was he supposed to be? He couldn't stand it that he hadn't been able to protect Jeff. All he could do was watch the fallout and it killed him to know that Jeff was trying to so hard for Nick. Nick didn't want Jeff to try, he wanted Jeff to not have to try. He wanted to go back and protect Jeff and stop everything that happened from happening.

Nick tried to get control of the current situation. The guilt was consuming him and he wanted badly to be mad at Jeff again. When he was mad at Jeff, it was like nothing happened.

He pulled back from Jeff and cleared his face of any mess and took deep breaths. "You went months without telling me anything. You kept me in the dark about not telling me about Drew, about not telling your parents about Drew, about graduating early, about your plans to move to California. Everything was a secret! Until it wasn't. You started to confess when you got a chance to run. Why?"

"It was important to me."

"Why?"

"Because I made a promise to talk to you! I wanted so bad to keep myself locked away but I couldn't do that to you! To the person I love more than anything!"

"I've ruined everything, Jeff. How could you still love me?"

Jeff laughed sadly. "Because you're my best friend. Because you were there when I wasn't. Because you cared. Because you're the only person for me and I've been stupid to realize that there's more than one piece to the puzzle."

"I don't know if I can let us be put back together again."

"Why not?" Jeff said it challenging, as if daring Nick to keep them apart.

"Because I can't fix you."

Jeff pulled Nick forward and kissed him hard, making Nick respond by grabbing Jeff and pulling him in even more. Jeff's hands cradled Nick's face and it was obvious that all he wanted was to stay there forever, but he pulled back, gasping for air.

"I'm not the one who needs fixing. Not anymore."

Nick bit his lip and let go so he could kiss Jeff again. "I've missed you."

"I've missed you more," Jeff replied.

Nick smirked. "I doubt that."

-:-

The next day Nick drove Jeff to the airport, the two holding hands and refusing to let go. Jeff sang along to the radio, his voice soft and harmonic and soothing. Nick watched him every chance he could get, constantly hoping to hit red lights just so he could stare.

The two had been inseparable since their talk the night before. Everyone was quite shocked to see the two return hand-in-hand, an atmosphere of love and understanding surrounding them. They'd spent the night dancing, not talking much but just touching. Neither wanted to talk, if only because they were scared they'd say something and everything would be ruined. They just needed each other's presence and that seemed to be enough to get them by.

When Josh and Sophie left for their honeymoon, Nick asked Jeff cautiously if he could stay the night. Jeff had raised an eyebrow but Nick quickly explained his situation at home and of course Jeff agreed, kissing the tip of Nick's nose as they made their way to Nick's car.

The two cuddled in Jeff's bed, making out at random times. Jeff offered to take the next step but Nick shook his head. He wasn't ready for that, even though he was obviously horny and wanted to. He was still dealing with today's emotions and he was exhausted. After making sure that Jeff wasn't feeling hurt from the rejection, he snuggled against the blonde boy's chest and entered a dreamless state of sleep.

Now it was morning and Jeff had a flight to catch. Nick didn't want Jeff to go but he knew that even though the two were talking again, and kissing again, and being in love again, that there was still a broken piece to the puzzle and things wouldn't be alright again until it was fixed.

It was up to Nick.

Nick wasn't quite ready to be fixed.

But he still enjoyed the time he had with Jeff.

As he pulled up to the entrance of the airport, he squeezed Jeff's hand tightly.

"I don't want you to go."

Jeff smiled and squeezed back. "I'll be back."

But will I be here? Nick wanted to ask. Of course, he didn't. He only smiled at Jeff and leaned in to kiss him.

The kiss wasn't long and it was obviously powered by the thought that Jeff had to go and that neither boy wanted to make this harder than it had to be. With a goodbye Jeff grabbed his backpack and got out of Nick's car, waving one last time before he disappeared into the busy building.

Nick drove away, imaging himself driving back to stop Jeff from getting on the plane.

He wished he was the type of guy that was brave.

-:-

That Monday, his last Monday of high school, Nick sat in his Geography class, daydreaming about Jeff in California when he heard a shriek from Ms. Wallas from the hallway. Everyone jumped out of their seats and fled out of the classroom to see what was going on, only to be surprised as four little pigs wearing papers strung around their necks running throughout the halls.

"Get them!" shouted the headmaster, his gray hair messy and the veins in his neck sticking out, a few students behind him as he rushed towards the piglets. Everyone fell out of the classroom and started to chase the pigs, who all broke off and went into different directions.

Nick and five others chased a pig labeled #3 and laughed as the thing dodged their hands. The cute thing made its way to the gym where Danny, the Ben's and Gary and another Nick stood, high fiving each other as the pig ran up to Danny. Danny grabbed it and gave it a kiss.

"Oh, Little Annie, you did such a good job."

Breathless, Nick asked "What's going on?"

Danny smiled widely at him. "Senior Prank."

"But you're not a senior," a asian kid named Rick said.

The red-headed Ben threw his arm around Danny's shoulders and smiled widely. "There wouldn't be a Senior Prank without this kid. We were literally idealess when he came up to us, telling us how his father worked on a farm and had access to pigs."

"That's it? You just let pigs loose?" another kid asked.

Danny smiled again. "Just wait."

-:-

Two hours later the headmaster's voice could be heard over the P.A. system, causing Thad to stop his lecture to the Warblers so everyone could listen in.

"Everyone, we've managed to locate and gather the pigs that were released during lessons. However, according to their labels, we are missing a pig labeled number four. So please, if seen, carefully return the pig to the front office where animal control will take care of them. We have yet to find out the person, or persons, behind this prank but if any of you have any information please do not hesitate to tell. Thank you."

"Oh, no, Danny! They're going to take your pigs away!" Trent stated. "And you're missing one!"

Danny smiled. "The pigs have been tattooed so my dad will be able to get them back, though I will without a doubt be grounded for the rest of my life. And as for piggie number four, let's just say that it doesn't exist."

"What do you mean?" James asked.

"There were only four pigs. We labeled them one, two, three, and five. Now everyone thinks there's one missing when there's not."

"That's genius!" someone stated, causing everyone to agree.

Nick smiled at Danny, who was completely flustered to be getting so much attention. Nick remembered how at the beginning of the year Danny had asked Nick about the prank, wanting badly to be Nick's best friend so he could be a someone. Nick wasn't his answer, though, but regardless he carried on. In the end, he was Nick's best friend and the most popular boy in the school. He'd made the Senior Prank a good one. Much better than last years. It was so boring that Nick couldn't even remember it, just knowing it had something to do with the a teacher's car.

Nick also watched the Warblers, all of them cheerful and talking to one each other with plenty of enthusiasm. Even Sebastian, who'd been quiet for a few weeks, had finally opened up and was chatting with random members. And when he caught Nick's eye, he smiled widely and Nick knew that everything was okay.

-:-

It was the last day of school, which meant everyone was going crazy and refusing to listen to what the teachers had to say, especially the seniors who'd be graduating the next day. It was Friday and the weather was perfect and hot, making it so all the Dalton students left their jackets in their cars or in their lockers. Some even left them at home, not worrying about getting in trouble.

The day was short and fast, full of laughs and talks about what was to come during summer. Nick didn't speak much about going to Ohio State, mostly because everyone bragged about getting into Harvard Law or Harvard Pre-Med. Thad was going to Brown. Trent was headed to New York to go to Juilliard. Sebastian didn't say where he was going but it was obvious he'd be leaving Ohio.

The only thing left to do at the school was to get a yearbook. After his last period, Nick made his way to the gym to get his. Everyone crowded the halls so they could sign each other's yearbooks.

Nick received his yearbook and headed to the final Warbler practice of the year. There was nothing to practice, of course, but it was the last time he was going to be a Warbler and he wanted to pretend that he was heading to the choir room to sing a song full of joy and glee. After all, being a Warbler was one of the things he's ever enjoyed more than anything and he was tremendously sad that it had to end.

As he made his way down the hallways, careless thumbing through the yearbook in his hand and greeting familiar bodies as they walked past, he found himself coming to a stop as he got to Jeff's picture. He was smiling, his white teeth showing and a light in his eyes that showed how happy Jeff had been at the time.

But it wasn't Jeff's beautiful picture that left Nick breathless.

It was the quote beneath.

"Nicholas Duval's first gay kiss."

end.

Author's Note: Congrats, you've made it to the end. I'm actually really proud of this despite the few flaws it has. I hope everyone who made it enjoyed it.

The ending is left open, just in case I decide to make a sequel, but the chances of that are slim. Really slim.

A big thank you to Doug who is better than all of you. I love him dearly.

Thank you! I hope you've all really enjoyed this.