Dedicated to: Stfu for feeding the NejiTen fangirl within me. It was because of her awesome story called Dirty Anatomy (go read it now!) that I managed to create this fic. Thanks for giving me the inspiration! Hope you enjoy this.

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters nor do I own the "Women's Rules for Men."

Warning: Might be OOC. You have been warned.

"Women are a complete mystery" - Stephen Hawking

(^.^)DATE(^.^)

SasuSaku

Girls are beautiful, but makeup always helps

When Uchiha Sasuke asked her out on a date one Friday morning in the middle of the hallway, Sakura blushed and mumbled a soft, "Sure." Sasuke smirked and proceeded to walk casually, leaving one flabbergasted and still blushing Sakura. Everyone who had witnessed the exchange began talking amongst themselves while some of Sasuke's fangirls fainted from shock. Sakura however, did not mind any of her gossiping schoolmates and hissing females. Instead she spent her time going to class, ignoring the pointed glares by some girls in her classes, and finished the day like it was any normal day.

It was when she reached her home and she was already inside her room did she finally realize that she was going on a date with Uchiha Sasuke tomorrow at 10 in the morning. The same Uchiha Sasuke whom she has been crushing on for years. She pinched her cheeks to confirm if she was dreaming or not. The pain was proof enough that Sakura had no choice but to replay the scene of him asking her out, take a deep breath, and then scream at the top of her lungs...

"OH MY GOD! SASUKE-KUN ASKED ME OUT!"

Her neighbors' dogs barked and Sakura distinctly heard her mother behind her door asking if she was all right. Sakura paid no heed to the dogs and answered her mother with an excited, "I'm fine, mother." Then she rushed to check her closet for anything appropriate to wear for her first date. In her search for the right outfit, she managed to create a mountain of thrown clothes on her floor before she realized that Sasuke was not one of those who appreciated looking at girls who dressed too much to please the opposite sex. She decided to keep things simple but still pretty. Make-up will be applied as well, of course.

"But the problem is, I don't think that the amount of make-up that I normally use will be enough to dazzle Sasuke-kun," Sakura thought as she examined herself in the mirror.

She bit her lip and glanced at her clock. It was already six in the evening and her date with Sasuke was at 10 in the morning tomorrow. She has approximately 16 hours to prepare.

"Tsk, not enough time," she rambled, "I better take note of a proper schedule so I won't act like an idiot." So make a schedule she did.

Sleep at 9 in the evening to prevent eye bags or sleep wrinkles. At exactly seven in the morning, it's time to wake up and do early morning stretches until 7:30. After that, time to take a bath until 8:15. Note to self, use strawberry shampoo with conditioner, it always makes the hair smell good. From 8:15 to 8:30, eat breakfast (make sure it's light or else you'll get cramps) and brush teeth. Never, EVER forget to brush teeth! After that, give self a makeover and a really, really good one at that. Do not use the same technique as when going to school because that would be very stupid. By 9:45, should be ready to go but walk slowly. It should be noted that girls are always fashionably late, so let Sasuke wait for a bit. But not too much or he'll get angry and the date might turn out sour. And most of all, try not to babble a lot on your first date. You want him to be interested in you so you have to keep him in the dark all throughout the day. Make him beg for more if you must.

Sakura checked and double checked her written plan and couldn't help but smile a bit. It was perfect, after all. She glanced at her clock, only to find out that it was already 8 in the evening. Just enough time to eat dinner and then go to sleep. She also checked her alarm clocks (she prepared three, just in case) and set all of them to 7 in the morning.

Sakura smiled to herself again. Tomorrow was going to be wonderful, she could feel it. But just to make sure, she ironed her dress twice, set up another alarm clock to 7 o'clock, and read her schedule all over again. Lastly, she checked her stock of makeup and other beauty essentials for the fourth time just to make sure.

(^.^)SHOPPING(^.^)

ShikaIno

Girls will always think we are fat so humor us and tell us we aren't

The moment Yamanaka Ino spotted that dress displayed in one of the mall's boutiques; she immediately knew she wanted it. Wanting to try it on, Ino dragged her boyfriend Nara Shikamaru with her, not minding the boy's protest.

"Excuse me, may I ask for a size S for this dress please?," Ino asked, giving a sunny smile to the female clerk of the store.

"Ino..." Shikamaru started but was cut off when the clerk reappeared again with the dress that Ino was looking for.

"Be right back Shika," Ino said sweetly, kissing her boyfriend's cheek. She rushed towards the dressing room with the piece of clothing in hand, chuckling a bit as a blush appeared on Shikamaru's cheeks.

The dress, as she had suspected, was truly beautiful. It reached just above her knees, just allowing to show a bit of her legs. It also fit her perfectly, accentuating curves she was very proud of. The dress was comfortable and at the same time, classy. Ino did not like it; she loved it, and was determined to buy it.

"Shika-kun, look!" Ino said as soon as she stepped out of the dressing room, "Isn't it lovely? It looks good, doesn't it?"

Shikamaru stared and admitted to himself that it did look good. However, he was certain that Ino had already spent her savings last week buying those new doll shoes. He had already predicted what was going to happen next and he did like it one bit. His common sense was already telling him to look away and run like there was no tomorrow.

"It looks good Ino..." he replied, "but don't you think-"

"I bet this would go well with those doll shoes I bought last time," Ino declared as she examined herself in the mirror, "What do you think Shika-kun?"

Shikamaru instantly looked away as soon as Ino's blue eyes connected with his dark ones. He hoped that if he kept quiet, Ino would get the point and drop the subject. He was already tempted to run away, but decided against it because Ino might get violent with him again. However he was not prepared for what happened next – Ino was crying loudly. In front of him. Inside the store with people. And in front of him!

"I-Ino... what- " Shikamaru asked as he reached out to hug his girlfriend. He was torn when Ino refused to his touches, her arms around her body as if to shield herself from him.

"I look fat, don't I ?" she asked as her tears began falling uncontrollably.

"Of course not," Shikamaru instantly denied, his voice slightly shaking from panic, "You look beautiful Ino."

"Liar!" Ino practically hissed, wiping her tears roughly, "I look fat, I just know it!"

"Ino you look beautiful, I swear," Shikamaru choked as he tried to console his weeping girlfriend. People were beginning to stare at them and others were glaring at him for making a girl cry. "In fact, I'm buying it for you now, see?" And to prove his point, Shikamaru slammed a couple of bills on the counter, amusing the cashier.

"I bought the dress baby," Shikamaru cooed, reaching out again to touch her bare shoulders. Luckily for him, Ino did not resist his hand like the last time. Shikamaru saw this as a sign that he was now allowed to hug her, which he did, just so he could stop her from crying.

Eventually her crying did stop, turning into tiny sobs and a couple of hiccups. Shikamaru was whispering sweet nothings in her ear to calm her down as the people around them began walking away to give them privacy. Because he was so busy trying to calm her, Shikamaru did not notice the triumphant smirk plastered in his girlfriend's face.

(^.^)Roller Coaster(^.^)

NaruHina

Girls like it when you're sensitive sometimes

When their homeroom teacher declared that they were going to have their class field trip at the Konoha Wonderland, Hinata was excited. It had been a long time since she went to an amusement park after all. Most of her classmates seemed just as excited as she was and were starting to make plans for the day. It took a while for their teacher, Iruka-sensei, to quiet them down and start the class.

The day for their field trip had finally arrived and as soon as they reached the amusement park, the students had formed groups, completely ignoring their teacher's warning of,"Don't do anything stupid!" Hinata found herself grouped with Naruto, Kiba, and Shino. Naruto and Kiba were arguing what rides they were going to try while Hinata was trying her best to stop the two from punching each other like last time. Shino on the other hand, remained quiet and was silently scouting for possible rides that looked fun and safe but did not have a long queue.

"We could try that one," Shino monotonously offered, pointing at a roller coaster called 'Death Trap.' The two boys stopped their argument, assessed the ride, looked at each other, and then grinned widely. They both apporved of Shino's plan. Meanwhile, Hinata looked pale beyond-belief and she began twiddling her fingers.

"Looks fun!" Kiba said as he hurriedly rushed next to Shino who was already lining up. Naruto was about to join them when he noticed that Hinata was not moving anymore. He looked back only to find Hinata still glued to the floor.

"Hinata-chan, you all right?" Naruto asked as he went to Hinata's side, putting a hand on her shoulder. The very action startled the poor girl and she was brought back to reality. Hinata looked around as she tried to organize her thoughts and she soon found herself face-to-face with Naruto.

"Uh...Uhmmm... wh-what?" Hinata stuttered, a deep blush rising on her cheeks.

"You look a little red... you don't have fever, don't you?" Naruto said as he eyed her critically.

"A-ah... I'm fi-fine..." Hinata replied, looking away.

Naruto nodded although he looked a bit uncertain. Suddenly the group became quiet and Hinata thought bitterly that she might have spoiled the fun with her childish fear of heights.

Just as soon as their turn was almost up, Naruto grabbed Hinata's hand which made her blush beet red. She could hear him explain some things to Kiba and Shino but could not focus much because her mind was in a gutter. And then Naruto ran, tugging her along with him. Thankfully Hinata's feet moved automatically for her. When they were a few feet away from the roller coaster ride, Naruto faced Hinata and gave her a goofy smile.

"Hey, Hinata-chan," Naruto started, the smile never leaving his face, "if you're scared, you don't have to hide it." In response Hinata nodded mutely, a bit surprised that Naruto noticed how uncomfortable she looked a few minutes ago.

"Why don't we go get some ice cream? Is that okay with you?" Naruto suggested, still holding her hand. Actually, it looked like he had no plans of letting go of her hand just yet and in all honesty, Hinata never wanted him to let go. She had always wanted her to hold her hand just like this after all.

(^.^)ANNVERSARY(^.^)

NejiTen

Saying something sweet might get you off the hook; doing something sweet will always get you off the hook

It all started when Tenten brought a puppy in their apartment. At first Neji did not question the rather random action his girlfriend had done because Tenten was always a kind and trustworthy person. Perhaps the tiny Dalmatian pup was homeless and Tenten felt it was her responsibility to give the dog a new home. Or maybe Tenten offered to watch the puppy for a friend who might be going for a vacation and could not bring it along. There were many possibilities so Neji waited patiently for Tenten to explain the situation to him.

It turned out that the puppy was a present from her to him for their third year anniversary, which he had forgotten... for the third time. The first and second time that Neji had forgotten their anniversary, Tenten forgave him, saying that it was more of a girl thing to remember dates.

However, to forget for a third time seemed inexcusable and unforgivable in Neji's opinion; and Tenten seemed to think so too for she locked herself and the puppy in their bed room, refusing to come out or talk to him. It only meant that she was angry and that Neji was spending the night on the couch unless he fixed things on the double.

In his confusion and desperation, Neji phoned the one man whom he trusted the most. He called his own uncle, Hyuuga Hiashi, who had served as his guardian when he became an orphan. And it was probably the best thing Neji had done, for his uncle listened patiently as Neji summarized the whole situation. After all things were said and explained, Hiashi gave Neji what he thought was the most effective way of asking for forgiveness: Apologize and court her all over again.

"Trust me," his uncle reassured as Neji fell silent, "this is based on experience after all."

And trust him Neji did. However, it was easier said than done. Not to mention his ego will have to suffer a fatal blow. Then again, what's important right now was that he fixed things with Tenten, so he'll just have to swallow his pride for the time-being.

So he nervously faced the wooden door that separated him and his girlfriend, paused for a while to think of a good plan, and knocked on the door. Unfortunately Tenten did not grace with him any answer, so he knocked again and called her name this time. He pressed his ear on the door and heard a few scuffles. Seconds later, a muffled "what" was heard on the other side and Neji breathed a sigh of relief.

"Tenten, look... I," he started, sounding apologetic and worried, "I'm really sorry for being... for being insensitive," he was struggling with his words now, "I did not mean... for this to happen."

He paused and waited for an answer on the other side. When he heard nothing, he continued," Tenten, please... I'll do anything for you to forgive me," he was pleading now but found out that he didn't care anymore," I'll do everything you want... so please, open the door."

He stopped again and waited. There was a moment of silence and then Tenten asked him in a very tiny and soft voice (so soft that he would not have heard had he not pressed his ear close to the door), "Why?"

"Because I love you," Neji replied, sounding sure and confident this time. He heard a gasp and Neji seized this as an opportunity to talk again," I love you so much that I would do everything; even throw my pride away, just so you would forgive me."

The door creaked open and Neji could see Tenten smiling a small yet satisfied smile. The puppy she had brought with her managed to squeeze itself out from the tiny gap that Tenten had opened for him.

"If you'll do everything, does that mean you'll treat me to dinner?" Tenten asked, still smiling a bit.

"Of course," Neji answered swiftly, "We can dine at the 'Golden Dragon', where we first had our date."

Tenten's eyes widened before a soft giggle escaped her lips, "I can't believe you remember that!"

"Hn. Of course." Neji replies, smirking slightly, "One of the waiters tried to flirt with you and I almost punched him."

When Tenten laughed out loud and fully opened the door, Neji knew instantly that he was forgiven. Inwardly he thanked his uncle for that good advice. What he didn't know, however, was that Tenten had anticipated that he would forget their anniversary and decided to use this as an advantage. After all, it had been a long while since they went out on a date.

(^.^)(^.^)

Author's notes:

Well played girls, well played. =)

I wrote this story not to insult the female population (that would mean I'm insulting myself, and that's just dumb) nor did I write it to start a gender-related argument. I'm just saying that females have moments of being difficult or confusing (I even confuse myself at times, it's crazy!), that's all.

Anyways, I hope you enjoyed the story. Reviews are always welcomed. If you have some tips, that would be lovely as well. Thanks.