A/N

Usually write for Red vs. Blue in the realm of machinima, but I have jotted down ideas for others. In this case, Fire Team Charlie. Also based on the 'rules of being' format.

Rules of Being

Red Team (the protagonists. Because Reds are always protagonists)

1) It's Jon who's the hero. Not John.

2) We're not stupid. We're just impetuous.

3) We're the team of the bell-curve. Because, you know, Jonathan's the only one scoring kills.

4) We all miss Silent Pete.

5) We don't miss Clip-Doodle-Bot. In fact, we rarely talk about him...well, ever.

Blue Team (we're not traitors. We're just damn dirty blues)

1) We're proof that you can never trust Japs...and that Native Americans are equally stereotypical.

2) Ever notice how often we use rocket launchers and sniper rifles?

3) We suffer an incredibly high mortality rate...just like another group of blues come to think of it.

4) We bury people under overshields. Because that's how we roll.

5) We're too good for glitches. That's why our Warthogs actually go along the ground.

Green Team (we're not cheese eating surrender monkeys! Cheese is disgusting!)

1) We're not French stereotypes. We're British stereotypes.

2) We're Green 'cause we're...well, green, as in inexperienced. Geddit? Anyone?

3) We're not British stereotypes, we're French stereotypes.

4) First rule of the inspectors is that we don't mention the inspectors.

5) Did I mention that we're stereotypes?

Yellow Team (yellow armoured, not just yellow bellied)

1) We sell goods to both Red and Blue Team. Got a problem with that?

2) There's nothing wrong with having a factory on top of a mountain. Or at least there isn't when you've got flying cars.

3) We're not orange! We're yellow!

4) Yes we are a team. Never mind that Gibson is the only member you see.

5) The gravity rifle crashes the software of the universe? Well, too bad. No refunds.