Really Quick Author's Note (the long one is at the end): This is my first Pokémon story ever. It's also my second one-shot. The title's shit, I know. I couldn't think of anything better. I decided to try second person POV, so it's more like someone talking to Lyra, so I apologize if you don't like it. I wanted to try something new. Feedback is appreciated, as long as it is ACTUALLY FEEDBACK, and not just "I hate this story" or something like that.

Thanks! I hope you enjoy the story!

LINE BREAK

Almost a year ago, she died.

After a month of going out, he never got to tell her he loved her.

You tried to comfort him. But something has gone wrong inside him- something has changed.

You wish he had loved you instead, just like you love him, because then, maybe, he wouldn't suffer so much.

LINE BREAK

You are alone. He rarely talks to you, and everyone else has gone on their journeys. Of course, since you are the youngest, everyone else was already gone. Silver, Gold, Crys, they're two years older than you. Crys was. Now... she's gone.

Before, the two of you made jokes and fooled around, while she worked and told you to be serious. "Super Serious Gal," he called her.

Now, when you want to play, he tells you to be more productive, to get something done.

Why? You want to ask, Because she would?

Last week, he brought you a pair of earrings, and said they reminded him of you.

You don't wear earrings

And they were shaped like crystals.

LINE BREAK

Another month passes, and your friends have been telling you to get on with your life. But he has been your best friend since you were little, and you refuse to leave.

And yet, you want to go so badly.

Two weeks ago, your hair was bent from sleeping on it. When you told him, he "fixed" it. He said it looked better the way he did it. The style seemed oddly familiar. When you got home, you realized why - it's the way her hair always looked.

The others come to visit occasionally. Blue, dragging Green with her. Red, who even comes down from the mountain, the only time other than her funeral. Yellow, from traveling. All the younger dexholders, who are even younger than you: Ruby, Sapphire, Dia, Pearl, Platina. Even Silver comes. Black and White did, too.

He ignores them all.

LINE BREAK

Silver comes to visit again. This time, he also visited you. He says that now, Gold won't look at his Pokédex. Silver says he doesn't know why.

You do.

It's because it reminds him of her.

He doesn't do anything that reminds him of her.

He and Falkner are good friends, yet he hasn't gone to Violet City since she died.

He hasn't gone anywhere.

LINE BREAK

You're running out of reasons.

Every day that passes, you want even more to leave and go on your own journey. You remember what Silver said: "You're going to throw away your whole life, just to take care of him? I can do that. Anyone can do that. No one can go on your journey for you."

You can't help but feel guilty, because you can't stop thinking about what he said.

You're also running out of patience.

Yesterday, he called you Crys for an hour before you finally left. You said you wanted to catch an arcanine, and he said that you already had one.

You don't have an arcanine.

She did.

LINE BREAK

Silver comes by again. He tells you that you have to go. You have a life ahead of you.

You ignore him.

You stay.

LINE BREAK

It's been 5 months, and Silver hasn't come back to visit.

You know that he won't come. He's exasperated with you. He thinks you're being an idiot.

He's right.

Gold is worse. He stays in his room or at her grave all the time.

Sometimes, you wish you had died instead, so at least he wouldn't have been so sad. He would have gotten over it. You're just his friend. He'd have her, his other half. If only you had died instead...

LINE BREAK

You keep trying to cheer him up. It's going on two years now since she died, and you're getting tired. His sadness is contagious. You used to be bubbly and excited, but now, you rarely smile.

You don't want to admit it, but you miss Silver. You don't understand it- the two of you were never close. You were always just Gold's kid friend who hung around. You know he only came so often to visit Gold, but you wonder why he wants you to go on your journey so badly.

Blue comes to visit again. She's brought Green with her. You can hear his complaining from what seems like a mile away.

"I have A GYM TO RUN, you know!"

"Pesky girl, you can't always randomly drag me off! There are trainers back in Viridian waiting to battle me!"

"Who do you think you are anyway?"

You almost smile when you hear Green's complaining. It reminds you that, despite the stark change in Gold's personality, everyone else is still the same.

LINE BREAK

Blue is talking to you. She's telling you that Gold will be fine, that you should go. You have your journey and your life to think about.

It sounds suspiciously familiar.

You ask if Silver asked her to tell you that. She laughs, and says no, and then, puzzled, asks why Silver would ask her to say that. You hesitate, then explain to her how Silver visited often, and told you to go on your journey, and finally, after months and months, he got fed up and left. You tell her how he hasn't visited for over 6 months, and that you miss him. You say that you don't know why he was so nice, or why you feel so close to him, but you miss him.

Blue laughs again, then smiles, as if she knows something you don't. It's that sly smile she gets when she's teasing Yellow and Red, or she's about to con someone, or she's going to go on a "shipping frenzy," as Green calls it.

She says that she and Silver were kidnapped when they were young (which you already know), and going on their Pokémon journeys meant a lot to both of them (which you didn't know). She says that he wanted to make sure that you got the chance too.

Suddenly, though you don't know why, you feel guilty. Maybe you shouldn't have been so irritable when Silver was trying to convince you to leave. He only wanted you to get the chance to live your life.

But, you realize, it doesn't matter now, because Silver is gone, and, as far as you're concerned, he's never coming back.

LINE BREAK

You've been denying this for months, but now, 2 years and 3 months after she died, you realize that he'll never love you the way you love him- love, or loved: you're not sure which one anymore.

You realize that Silver was right, that you have to leave. But who will take care of Gold?

If only you'd listened to Silver all those months ago... he could have stayed with Gold while you traveled.

But now, you remind yourself for the millionth time, he's gone. He's done with you. He doesn't care anymore. Not even a little.

So you stay anyway.

LINE BREAK

It's been two months since you realized you should have left, and, though you can't believe it, Silver is here. To see Gold- and to see you.

You feel happier than you have for a long time.

LINE BREAK

He's back for a short visit, and he says he can't stay long. He's trying to find someone- someone important. He won't say who.

You look crestfallen, and he promises you that as soon as he finds them, he'll come back, and then you can go. He looks so miserable, apologizing again and again, that you hug him.

But as he, surprisingly, hugs you back, all the pain and sadness tumbles out, as if the wall you have subconsciously built up has broken, no, it has been destroyed, and the tears flow faster than the Tohjo Falls. He doesn't seem to know what to do, but then you hug him closer, as if letting go will kill you, and so he wraps his arms tighter around you, and lets you cry into his shirt.

You cry, and tell him about how you can't bear to see your best friend like this, and how you don't know how to make him feel better, and how, though you want to go live your life, you feel like a horrible person, as though you are abandoning Gold.

And you tell him that you love Gold. He stiffens, but doesn't say anything.

But then you realize that you don't feel that way anymore, and correct yourself.

"Loved," you say, realizing the truth. "I loved Gold."

And suddenly he relaxes, though you don't notice it, because you are too busy bawling into his shirt, which is becoming more and more soaked by the second. But he doesn't pull away, and he doesn't tell you to stop, which is strange, because when you were younger, and you met him for the first time, he didn't take you seriously at all.

Now he's quietly telling you that it will all be all right, that you'll end up ok, to rely on your friends...

You start crying all over again.

He looks shocked, and sad, as if he's done something wrong, but he hasn't. You cry harder, and tell him that they don't care, they were never really your friends, that they're Gold's friends, and, most importantly, you feel like you don't have anyone.

He chuckles, and tells you that for the past few months, while everyone is still sorry for Gold, they are all much more worried about you. He tells you that Red tried to call you, that Blue and Green visited (which you already know), and that everyone has been asking him how you're doing.

You look up, releasing his shirt, and he smiles at you - and then he notices the scars. The ones on your wrists. From when you wanted to die, thinking that no one really needed you around anyway, since even your own mother didn't talk to you (though she never really did anyway, it was much harder to deal with once Gold stopped being, well... Gold.), and he looks angry, angrier than you have ever seen him before.

His voice is menacing, and dangerous, but low, as he asks, "Who did this to you?" in a voice that you can barely hear, and yet it seems so loud that you feel like you are getting a headache.

"I did," you say quietly, so softly that you doubt he can hear you, but he does, because he narrows his eyes, frowns, and repeats his question.

"I did," you respond, and he's shocked. It's clear he didn't believe you the first time you said it.

"Why?" His voice is quiet, and scary, and you feel paralyzed.

"I wanted to die."

It seems as though he is about to do anything- yell at you, hit you, push you and leave, anything except what he did- hug you so tightly it seems like if he let go, he would lose you.

"Never. Do. That. Again," He growls. "You have no idea how many people are grateful that you're alive."

You just sit there, in Silver's arms, quietly thinking, for what seems like an eternity.

And yet, when he has to go, it feels like you only spent a few minutes with him.

LINE BREAK

You feel so alone again. Silver is gone, off on his mission, whatever it is. Gold does nothing but sit in his room. He doesn't eat the food you bring.

Somehow, you realize that you've almost stopped being worried about Gold. He's your friend, and so you want him to be happy, but you've realized that he's grown old. He acts like an old man who's wife has passed away, counting the days until he can join her.

You wish Silver had told you what he's doing. Blue visited again last week (dragging Green along), and it was clear that she knew. Then again, Blue always knows things that she's not supposed to know.

You wonder, for what seems like the millionth time, how Silver is.

LINE BREAK

Your mother left to go visit some friends of hers that live in Sinnoh. She knows what you're going through, but she still decided to go spend two months with some random friends.

And now, since Arceus picked the fucking best timing ever, you're spiraling back into depression, and there is no one here to stop you.

No one here...

You go downstairs, roll your sleeves back, and pick up a knife.

But just as you are about to make the cut, you see his face. Silver's face. You remember what he told you: Never do that again.

And you put the knife back, as if in a trance, and you are glad that you did, because one week later, Silver calls.

He's coming back to Johto, to New Bark Town, and he's coming to visit you.

LINE BREAK

Silver is here. You hug him, and then you realize- there's an eerily familiar man standing behind him.

You ask Silver who the man is. He says he's his father, Giovanni.

Giovanni.

You've heard that name...

You scream so loudly that Silver seems to think you're going to die.

"Lyra! Lyra! What's wrong?" He asks, shaking you by the shoulders.

"What's wrong? That's what's wrong," you scream, pointing. "Do you know who that is?"

He calms you down, makes you go inside, and explains everything. At the end, you're still not convinced, but you decide to let it go.

He tells you he's been searching for his father, who's the only family he has, and he didn't want to tell anyone, because of who his father is.

You feel guilty again.

He asks how you've been doing. You lie. It's clear he doesn't believe you. He asks where your mom, is has she been taking care of you, and you start to silently cry. He gets up, and hugs you, as if it's a reflex now, the second you cry, he knows to hug you.

His father watches this silently, clearly shocked.

And you can't help but wonder if you're falling in love with Silver.

LINE BREAK

You're almost packed. Silver kept his promise, and he'll be staying with Gold while you travel. You've decided to challenge the gyms, but you don't want to go for the league. You've always wanted to be a Pokéathlete, and this is your chance.

You feel guilty, though. Silver... he's giving up his chance to keep traveling just so you can see the world. He's given you his number, and you've put into your Pokégear, and you've made him promise to call once a week to tell you how Gold is doing. Even though you've realized that you're not in love with Gold anymore, he's still your best friend, and he always will be.

You're 15, and just barely starting your journey. Better late, though, you think, than never. Because, after all, you were planning to spend the rest of your life taking care of Gold, if you had to. You never admitted it, but you know, deep down, it's true.

So you pick up your bag, hug your mother (who's honestly more interested in the TV than you leaving), and go to Gold's house. You have to say good bye to Gold.

You have to say good bye to Silver.

LINE BREAK

You're on your way to Violet City, and you're grateful Silver bought you a bike. He called it a "Good luck present," but it's clear he's just being nice to you, like he always is.

You keep biking, and think of the promise you made- you're going to beat every gym leader in Johto. And you're going to do it in 3 months. The three months is because of his birthday. You want to go back for it. He doesn't know you remember, though.

Your chikorita is already getting stronger, and sometimes you feel strange, remembering that she had a chikorita too. Crys.

You admit that you miss her. She was nice to you, when she wasn't telling you that you and Gold were being immature, or lazy, or making perverted jokes.

But you shake your head, and focus on the road ahead. You want to get to Violet City by the end of the day.

LINE BREAK

You just beat Falkner. You had to admit, it wasn't exactly easy with your starter being your strongest Pokémon, and having a type disadvantage, but you managed to beat him.

You call Silver, eager to tell him about your victory. He tells you that Gold is fine, that everything's great, and wishes you good luck on the next gym battle- in Azalea Town.

LINE BREAK

It's been a month since your journey started, and you've beaten Falkner, Bugsy, Whitney, and Morty. You have more Pokémon now. You've also competed in your first Pokéathlon, a speed course. You won, barely. You never thought your rattata could be so useful.

Silver keeps in touch, and occasionally he forces Gold to get on the phone and talk to you. You are worried about Gold, but Silver reassures you, and forces you to think about your journey. You're glad Silver is taking care of Gold.

You remind yourself again that, when you get back, you'll have to thank him in person.

LINE BREAK

A month and a half has passed. You're glad that you trained your pidgeotto well, since it's pretty much the reason you beat Chuck. You can use fly now, which is useful, and now you can go back to visit much more easily.

You only need three more badges now. Jasmine, Pryce, and Clair. Then, you'll go back to visit.

You feel the guilt setting in again, knowing that Silver is taking care of Gold while you enjoy yourself, and you feel guilty knowing that Gold is so miserable, and yet you haven't been this happy in a while.

But you shake the feeling off, and keep biking toward Olivine. The faster I get the gym badges, you tell yourself, the sooner I can go back to visit.

LINE BREAK

You hate the snow. Battling through Ice Path, the only thing that keeps you going is knowing that Gold has gone through much, much worse.

You're starting to see the exit, and you're wishing that you could run, instead of trudging through the snow.

You have only one thought running through your mind as you fight to get to the exit, re-energized: What the hell was Red thinking when he decided to go live on Mt. Silver?

LINE BREAK

You just beat Clair, and you have two weeks before you said you'd be back. You're thinking of visiting Kurt and his granddaughter on the way back, but then you get a call from Silver.

The second you pick up, you know something's wrong.

"Lyra, you have to come back, right now."

"Silver, I will, I'm on my way-"

He cuts you off, saying, "No Lyra, I mean right now. Gold... it's not good."

Fear grips you, and you can't move. Your voice raises a few octaves. "What do you mean, Silver?"

He pauses, and for a moment you think the call's been cut off. But the moment he speaks, you wish he had hung up on you. His voice is hesitant, and it seems as though Silver's choking back tears as he tells you, "Lyra... Gold... he has cancer."

You feel as though time has stopped, as you struggle to reply. "Silver... I... I'm on my way."

As you climb onto your pidgeot's back, one sentence resonates through your mind, over and over again: "Lyra... Gold... he has cancer."

LINE BREAK

You only made one stop on the way, in Violet City, and that was only to go to a Pokémon Center to heal your pidgeot. You probably look like a mess, but you don't care. All you can think of is Gold, who's always been your best friend, who you abandoned...

You half-break-down-half-open the door, and race up to Gold's room. You start to cry, seeing him so vulnerable. In the two and a half years since Crystal died, Gold has never seemed so close to death.

Silver hugs you, and whispers in your ear, "Lyra, the doctors said... he only has three months left."

You turn around so fast Silver looks alarmed. "What? No!" You whisper, careful not to wake Gold. "He can't die, he can't! He can fight it! People survive cancer all the time!" You don't want to believe it. Gold, he can't die, not now, not this young...

"Lyra," Silver replies, "the doctors say Gold can't fight it. Or, rather, he won't. His body... it gave up before he even got cancer. Even when they told him... he didn't care. He misses her, Lyra, and no matter how much he knows he'll miss everyone here, and how much we'll miss him, he can't pretend he's not a little happy that he'll see Crys again."

You nod, and, yet, it's too much to handle. You start to cry again, and you sit there for what seems like hours, crying in Silver's arms, at the bedside of your best friend, who's dying. More than ever now, you wish Crystal was alive, and that you had died instead. Maybe then, he wouldn't have given up, and he would have kept fighting. Maybe then, Gold wouldn't be dying, right now, in front of you.

Another sob wracks your body, and you curl up into a ball on Silver's lap.

LINE BREAK

Gold's awake now, and you try to look normal, for his sake. He's smiling, but you know it's forced. He spends a lot of time looking at the picture of Crys next to his bed. You want to snatch it away, as if taking away all reminders of her will force him to keep living, but you know him well enough to let it go- Gold... hasn't been, well, Gold for a long, long time. The part that makes him who he is... well, that died two years ago. It's just waiting for his body.

You and Silver have been trying to make him go outside, to live his last months to the fullest, but all he wants to do is sit in his room and look at pictures of his time with her.

And even though you are completely, one-hundred-percent, absolutely, positively over him, you feel the tiniest twinge of jealousy.

Not because he doesn't think of you that way. It's because nobody has ever thought of you that way.

LINE BREAK

You are walking along the little strip of water that is in between the trees on the edge of New Bark Town. Suddenly, remembering all the time you and Gold spent here, playing, you collapse, and bury your head in your hands.

Silver comes up behind you, silently, and sits next to you.

He doesn't talk for a long time, and then, as if he didn't mean to say anything, blurts out, "I'll miss him too, you know."

You raise your head, and look at him, tears threatening to fall out of your eyes. You ask yourself again, for the thousandth time, When did I become so wimpy?

He smiles, but it's more a grimace than a smile, and wipes the tears from your eyes with his sleeve.

"He's going to be fine. If Gold's accepted it, well, I guess we should too."

You look at him in wonder, shocked at what he's said, until you realize that his eyes are tearing up too. You leap at him and hug him, and he buries his head in your shoulder, whispering as he cries, tears soaking your shirt, "We'll see him again someday. We'll see them both again."

And you nod, because, at the end of the day, there is nothing else you can do. Because whether you can accept it or not, in two months, Gold will be dead.

LINE BREAK

One more month. You and Silver dragged Gold out for a picnic. He agreed, but on one condition, a condition you and Silver are not happy to oblige- he wants to visit Crystal's grave.

You don't want to remind him of death on the one day he's willing to live life. But you don't want to upset him, so you agree to go.

When you get there, he takes some flowers out of his pocket- he bought them at a nearby store- and lays them at the tombstone. He cries a little, then burns a letter that he brought, in the hopes, he's said, that maybe it can reach her.

You hug him, and drag Silver into the hug, and the three of you stand there, at the grave of the friend you have lost.

LINE BREAK

You can tell Gold is dying. He always said, when the two of you played "Would You Rather?" that he wanted to die in his sleep. You and Silver are at his bedside, his mother standing behind you, crying, with Professor Elm and your mother there too. The Dexholders are there as well. Red, who has come down from Mt. Silver. Blue and Green, who have come from Viridian City. Yellow, who has come from her uncle's house in Mahogany Town. Ruby and Sapphire, from Hoenn. Emerald, who's come from the Battle Frontier. Platina, Dia, and Pearl, who've come from Sinnoh. Black and White, who came all the way from Unova. Professor Oak is here, too.

You are all standing there, unsure of what to do, and then Gold cracks open one eye, and says, so softly you all have to lean in to hear, "I'm alright... really, I am. I'm going to see her again. I'll tell her... I'll tell her that you all miss her. I... love... all... of... you..."

And he closes his eyes, for the final time, rests his head back in the pillows, and sleeps. You're not sure exactly when, but you think it only took a couple minutes- he's dead.

LINE BREAK

The funeral is sad. He's buried next to Crystal, and there's an extra inscription put onto both tombstones- Here lie two young lovers, who never got the chance that so many take for granted, yet experienced more love and less hate than most do in 100 years.

You are crying so hard that you think you will never cry again. You helped to pick the inscription for their tombstones, and you hoped (and still hope) that, someday, you will experience the kind of love they shared. You know that you love Silver the way Gold loved Crystal, but you're certain he doesn't feel the same way.

Still, as you sob into your hands, looking at the grave of your best friend, it's nice to have Silver's arms around you, while he cries into your shoulder, and at least know he will always be there for you.

And the two of you stand there together, surrounded by Gold's friends and family, and know that you will never forget Crystal and Gold, and, most of all, know that the two of you will always have each other.

LINE BREAK

(A/N: This part is for all of you SoulSilvershippers out there who want more than Lyra admitting her feelings for Silver, and instead would prefer a little confessing on both sides)

It's two weeks after the funeral, and Silver is with you, while you both stare out across the water to Kanto. It's calming, and in the back of your mind, you wonder what Gold and Crys are doing.

Silver seems nervous, and you wonder why. He clears his throat, suddenly, and turns to you, blushing, and looking, for a second, more like a 12 year old boy than an 18 year old man.

"Yes, Silver?" You ask, puzzled.

"Well, uh, you see... the thing is..." He stammers, not able to speak. He's turning redder, and you're afraid sooner or later he's going to turn the color of his hair.

"Yes?"

He stands up, and offers you his hand. You take it, and the two of you surf on his Lapras (A/N: I don't really remember what Pokémon he has...) out onto the water.

"Well, Lyra... I was thinking about how Gold and Crystal... well, they never really got the chance to live out their lives... and well, it got me thinking that life... it's really short... and... damn it, Lyra, I'm trying to say that I love you!"

He turns red, as if he hadn't really meant to say the last part, and then looks away, ashamed.

"Silver... I... love you... too..." You are quiet, and one might think that he couldn't hear you over the water, but you know he can.

He turns around, and looks at you, and you smile shyly. He looks stern, and then smiles back. Slowly, he leans forward, and kisses you gently, and then you wrap your arms around his neck and lean in.

LINE BREAK

A few days later, as the two of you are slowly walking back to your house, coming back from visiting Gold's grave, (you burned a letter telling him that you're together now- you thought he might like to know, in case he's busy reuniting with Crystal and his grandparents), you ask Silver how long he has liked you. He blushes, and mutters something inaudible.

"What? I couldn't hear you," you say, smiling.

"A couple of years," he says, louder this time, blushing. You can't help but laugh at how often he's been blushing lately, when normally he is somber and cold.

The two of you feel happy, as if Gold and Crystal are smiling down on you two. You both miss them, but you're trying to do what they would have wanted you to do. Still, there are times when you can't sleep because you see Gold dying over and over again before your eyes, or when Silver sees graves all around him and becomes afraid to close his eyes. And yet, you know that Gold and Crystal want you to be happy, so that's what you do- try your best to be happy.

"Really?" You ask, intrigued.

"Yes... you really couldn't tell?" He grumbles, then is shocked.

"No... I couldn't..." You blush, slightly embarrassed.

"Why do you think I kept bugging you?" He raises an eyebrow, and you feel slightly defensive.

"Blue told me that having your Pokémon journey was important, and you didn't want me to miss the experience!" You stomp your foot, indignant, feeling like a child.

He laughs for a moment, and then says, "I'll have to thank her for not spilling my secret... that's true, but why do you think I was so damn persistent?"

You laugh, and agree. The two of you kiss briefly, and then, as you slip your hand into his, and the two of you walk back to New Bark Town, you feel happier than you have in a while.

In many ways, the two of you have Gold to thank for it.

LINE BREAK

Author's Note: Hi! This is my first Pokémon fanfic! And my second one-shot ever! I feel like it's a lot better than some of my Harry Potter ones, though I admit it was a lot harder writing some of it... I actually cried when I killed Gold. Thank you to my amazing, AMAZING roommate, who has sat through many of my sessions of insanity, in which I tried to figure out all the details I wanted to include, and generally deals with my weirdness. Seriously, she deserves an award.

This fic evolved a LOT in the two weeks it took me to write it. I kept deleting everything and changing the plot. Originally, there was no SoulSilverShipping at all! It was going to be a one-sided HeartSoulShipping fic. I also ended up making it a LOT happier.

I'd like to thank Liz Hollow (who I doubt will ever actually come across this story, but she deserves to be thanked), who is the reason I love SoulSilverShipping, because I never would have written this without reading your stories, and finding what is now one of my favorite shippings!

To anyone who reads my Harry Potter stories, I've had a TON of tests lately, and I have a HUGE project due next week. I'm not kidding, I YELLED "Bloody Hell!" in one of my classes when I found out I had two tests and a project due on the same day. So I'm sorry that I haven't updated. I'll try to next week, I promise!

Thanks for reading my story. Any feedback you want to give is appreciated. I don't mind flames, as long as you ACTUALLY PUT SOME REASONS into the flame. "I hate this story" is not ok. I need a reason. Likewise, please don't hate the story just because you may dislike the pairing.

Thanks!

xAnita