Heavy in Your Arms, a merlin fanfic

A/N: Hey, guys! I'm really excited, since this is my very first story ever! Pu-leeeaaase review for constructive criticism! No flames, cause they'll make me cry. I don't like crying. Just so you know. And when people make me do things that I don't like, bad things happen, JK! But anyway, read/review. ENJOY! This is a songfic for Heavy in Your Arms by Florence + the Machine. DON'T OWN THEM OR MERLIN! (Sadly. Colin Morgan is sooooo pretty! : D ) set sometime after Morgana comes back. Bold italics are thoughts, italics are song lyrics, bold italics are also flashbacks to previously spoken words, and normal typing is...well…normal typing… RATED T CAUSE I'M RETARDED!

Morgana POV

Morgana yawned as she sat up on her bed. There was a fuzzy feeling in the back of her head, but she easily ignored it. She had a meeting with Morgause tonight. She got up and went to her dresser to get ready for the day, when Gwen walked through the door, carrying her dress to wear.

"Good morning, my lady." Gwen said brightly. She was one of many people happy to see her back. Morgana's mind flew to Merlin, who wasn't one of them. Her thoughts filled with violence, but she swept it away to reply with a forced smile.

"To you as well. I've missed you."

Gwen grinned back and walked her to the changing screen. She silently helped Morgana into her gown, and then left.

Morgana walked back to her dresser and brushed through her hair, while thinking about how much she wanted to kill Merlin. Then he walked in.

Merlin POV

No matter how much he didn't want to, Merlin was sprinting up the stairs to Morgana's chambers. Gaius wanted him to deliver her sleeping draught. He was nearing her room, and then paused. She was an evil person who most likely did NOT forgive him for poisoning her, no matter how convincing her act of forgiveness may have been. He went into the room, and walked up to Morgana. She didn't seem to notice him, so he cleared his throat. She looked back and locked her eyes with his.

"Oh. What are you doing here?" She asked with distaste.

"I could ask you the same question." Merlin countered. Morgana just smirked and turned away. Merlin shook his head, put the potion on her table and started walking out. As he turned, he heard Morgana gasp, and he whirled around to see her holding the back of her head.

"Are you okay?"

"Don't be so quick to worry. I'm fine."

Merlin arched his eyebrow, and slowly turned. Morgana sighed, and he walked out.

Morgana POV

A few hours later, Morgana set out for her meeting with Morgause. The funny feel in her head worsened, and she felt dizzy. At least it wasn't causing the sharp pain in the back of her head that had happened when Merlin dropped of her potion. On Morgana's way out, Arthur walked past, and a strange thought came to her head. She didn't want to kill him. No thoughts of hurting him came to mind. Her pace slowed as she thought. She couldn't think of a reason for her to feel the need to kill him. She couldn't even remember why she was meeting with Morgause. She didn't remember why she was upset with Merlin. She stopped walking and thought. Why all of a sudden did her whole train of thought turn around? What could've happened? Morgana thought about the funny feel in her head. She'd been under enchantment before. It felt exactly the same. Morgause was the one who hated Uther. Morgause was the one who was fighting against the magic ban. Morgause was the one who had enchantedher.

Multiple feelings coursed through her. Betrayal, hatred, sadness, vengefulness, anger. She hurriedly walked to the meeting spot to confront Morgause, but she had no idea she was being watched.

Merlin POV

(A/N Start the song… NOW!)

Merlin watched as Morgana left her chambers. Anger pulsed through his veins. (A/N uugh. I HATE that word.) He watched as she slowed her pace, and then stopped walking. She got a confused look on her face, and determinedly walked on. Merlin followed, staying close to the walls. Morgana walked to the woods, and sat on a fallen tree base. Merlin crept to a ditch and listened.

I was a heavy heart to carry

My beloved was weighed down. My arms around his neck,

My fingers laced to crown.

He heard footsteps, and then Morgause's voice.

"Hello, sister. Have you any information?"

"Only that you enchanted me," Morgana's voice dripped with hatred.

"Ah. If you would, follow me."

"What makes you think I would do that?"

"Do you want to understand why I'm doing all this or not?"

"…"

Merlin poked his head up after the silence, and saw Morgause and Morgana walking along to the river running through the woods. He could hear his heartbeat in his ears.

Morgana POV

I was a heavy heart to carry,

My feet dragged across the ground,

And he took me to the river, where he slowly let me drown.

Morgana was cautiously walking behind Morgause when she turned around and grabbed Morgana's wrist.

"You could walk like a normal human,"

As Morgause literally dragged Morgana across the ground, across some stones along the river, and to a small stream that made a waterfall about six feet tall.

My love has concrete feet, my love's an iron ball

Wrapped around your ankle, over the waterfall

"Really, Morgana. It's like I'm dragging chains around. Walk faster."

Morgana refused to speak until everything was explained, so silence followed the rest of the way.

I'm so heavy, heavy, heavy in your arms

And is it worth the wait

All this killing time?

Are you strong enough to stand, protecting both your heart and mine?

Who is the betrayer? Who's the killer in the crowd?

The one who creeps in corridors, and doesn't make a sound.

Merlin POV

Merlin trailed behind further than before, and pushed through his confusion.

All the wasted time, and Morgana wasn't even the traitor. As he walked to where they had stopped by the waterfall, he felt like he was trudging through thick mud of hesitance, and found it hard to pick up his own feet.

Oh, my love has concrete feet, my love's an iron ball,

Wrapped around your ankle over the waterfall

My love has concrete feet, my love's an iron ball,

Wrapped around your ankle over the waterfall

I'm so heavy, heavy, heavy in your arms

He realized whom he was following, and a million ideas flew through his mind.

I'm following an evil, powerful sorceress and possibly the love of my life.

Said sorceress is evil, and was just discovered by her ex partner in crime, and said sorceress could easily kill said partner and that would not end well.

Morgana POV

"So what exactly have you to say to me?" Morgana demanded.

"Wonderful. I thought you'd gone mute, sister."

"Don't call me sister. I could never love a sister like you. Sisters don't enchant one another without approval."

This will be my last confession, 'I love you' never felt like any blessing.

"I know you wouldn't feel that if it didn't have to be kept hidden,"

Whispering like it's a secret

In order to condemn the one who hears it

With a heavy heart

"I would considering as soon as I get back to Camelot, I'm going straight to Uther,"

"Well then I guess I can't let you leave,"

Merlin POV

Merlin closed in quick enough to hear part of their conversation.

"as soon as I get back to Camelot, I'm going straight to Uther,"

"Well then I guess I can't let you leave,"

At that point, Merlin began running to the waterfall, only to be lost in a mess of trees.

Come on! Give me a direction!

Merlin heard a strangled scream, and he sprinted towards it.

Morgana POV

"Well then I guess I can't let you leave,"

Morgause grabbed Morgana's throat and shoved her towards the waterfall. She felt the water drench her robes and hair. The water was so cold that it paralyzed Morgana, so she couldn't stop herself from being drowned. She let out a high-pitched scream; in hopes someone would hear her. Water filled her mouth, and she began pushing against Morgause, when she heard someone whisper

"Ic þé wiþdrífe"

Morgause was thrown into a large boulder, and then fell down, dead.

She looked around for her savior, but blacked out. Before she was completely unconscious, she saw a familiar face that reached down and lifted her into their arms.

Heavy, heavy, I'm so heavy in your arms.

I'm so Heavy, heavy, I'm so heavy in your arms
I'm so Heavy, heavy, I'm so heavy in your arms
I'm so Heavy, heavy, I'm so heavy in your arms

Morgana slowly opened her eyes, and looked up to see Merlin carrying her back to Camelot.

"Merlin?"

"Shh. I'm taking you to Gaius, and you'll have to stay the night there."

"Why?"

"Morgana, you almost drowned."

"Oh…"

"Try to go back to sleep."

Morgana was too tired to argue. She wrapped her arms around his neck and folded her hands. She leaned up to kiss him gently, then settled back into his arms and fell asleep.

I was a heavy heart to carry,
My beloved was weighed down.
My arms around his neck,
My fingers laced to crown.

Morgana woke up in a less luxurious bed than her own, and her hand was on something very soft. She opened her eyes and saw that she was in Gaius's home, and that the soft material she had been stroking was Merlin's hair. She had been laid down on the medical bed, and Merlin was hunched over in a chair next to her with his head on the bed by her left elbow. He was holding her right hand while her left was on his hair. She vaguely remembered what had happened after she had fallen back asleep, but she knew one thing.

She whispered to herself:

"I was a heavy heart to carry,
But he never let me down.
When he had me in his arms,
My feet never touched the ground"

I'm so heavy, heavy in your arms.

Heavy, I'm so heavy in your arms.

And she fell asleep with the future of herself and Merlin in her dreams, filled with happiness and small children with raven hair and fair skin.

YAY! I'm so proud of my crappy story! 1st ff ever! Boo-yah! I'm gonna check this over to my good buddy Brooke aka Annabeth Jackson or Wisegirl before I post, but THANKS FOR READING! NOW REVIEW, MY CHILDREN, REVIEW! I'M OFF TO GET MORE STORY IDEAS FROM MY BRAIN WHICH I KEEP IN A PICKLE JAR…. Um… I don't think you guys needed to know that. Oh well. Go pelt hobos with skittles, read more fundiddlytastic stories,or even wash your best friend's neighbor's toilet with peanut butter. PEACE!

LOVE, Pineapple-Sorceress