A Ring on my Finger

"Shut the door… turn the light off, I wanna be with you, I wanna feel your love, I wanna lay beside you…I cannot hide this…even though I try…"

His body swayed to the music dominating his senses. The beat rocked his heart, his soul sang with the trilling guitar. His world became the music. His eyes closed and relished in the darkness, the loneliness of his imaginings.

"If we could only have this life for one more day… if we could only turn back time…"

He swung and circled hand-in-hand with a small brunette. His palm pressing against the boy's waist pulled their hips closer and their feet moved deftly, creating patterns upon the dance floor.

He sang along beneath his breath with a secret smile upon his lips, "You know I'll be, your life, your voice, your reason to be… my love, my heart, is breathing for this… Moment, in time I'll find the words to say… before you leave me today…"

He could see himself looking into the brunette's calm, shy, brown eyes. He bent lower… their lips were so close…

"Enma? So this is where you were." A muffled voice spoke through the beat.

Surprised, Enma's feet tangled beneath him and he stumbled with his face crushing into the scratchy carpet. His earphones fell from his ears.

"Ah! Enma? Are you alright?" The brunette hurried across their bedroom room to the fallen Shimon.

"Uhm...ah…"

Tsuna laughed, "Enma, what were you doing?"

Enma's face burned hotter and he avoided Tsuna's curious gaze, "N-Nothing… Just practice…"

Tsuna smiled fondly at the red-head and held out his palm to help Enma to his feet, "Enma, are you really that worried about the ceremony?"

Enma avoided Tsuna's curious gaze, "I… I wanted to make sure I don't mess up Tsuna's special day…"

The Vongola Boss shook his head, laughing lightly. He reached up, and wrapped his arms around Enma's neck just to be a bit closer, "But Enma, it's your special day too! I don't exactly know how to dance either, so let's not know how to dance together, 'kay?"

Enma immediately relaxed and slid his arms around Tsuna's slim waistline. Tsuna was wearing his usual suit Reborn-san forced him to wear even for daily occasions. A small smile appeared on his face and he couldn't help but placing a small peck on his lover's nose, "If that's what Tsuna wants…"

There was an amused cough at the door, "Ehem, your appointment arrived, herbivore."

The two lovers jumped apart, identical redness splashed across their cheeks. Enma adjusted his tie awkwardly.

"Hi-Hibari-san!" Tsuna yelled indignantly, "I… I already know that!"

Hibari shrugged and strolled away while yawning as if there was nothing left in this world worth worrying over. Tsuna glared at the doorway then returned his attention to the Shimon, "I'm sorry Enma. I have to go, will you wait for me?"

Enma was surprised at his question and thought it a bit peculiar, "Of course Tsuna; I'll be here."

"Do you trust me?" Tsuna continued with a bit more intensity and nervousness then usual.

Enma searched his lover's face carefully, "Is something wrong...?"

Tsuna put his face into his hands and sighed, he spoke even as his voice began to croak, "No… nothing's wrong… I'll be back okay? Good-bye Enma."

"Ah-"

Before Enma could stop him Tsuna hurried from the room with purposeful steps and the Shimon Boss was left alone with only the memory of Tsuna's embrace. He decided maybe to walk around a bit to shake off his nerves. Tsuna's words scared him but he kept telling himself that it wasn't worth worrying about. He would trust Tsuna just as he promised.

He strolled leisurely through Vongola Manor. He waved good-naturedly at Kyoko and Haru-chan, and watched an entire argument between Tsuna's rain and storm Guardians in the middle of a busy ballroom. He noticed a few of the other Vongola Guardians making themselves busy. Ryouhei was relocating the heavyweight Grand Piano "To the EXTREME!" and Lambo lazed about and acted as if taping bows on the back of cushioned chairs were hard work.

"I told you, we need yellow flowers, not green! That's entirely inappropriate for the color scheme I set up!" Gokudera grabbed Yamamoto's shirt threateningly, his cigarette sticking lazily from his lips.

Yamamoto laughed put up his hands in attempt to calm the storm Guardian, "I'm sorry Gokudera, but they had the same color as your eyes. I just had to get them!"

Gokudera blushed wildly and shoved the flowers on to the rain Guardian's face, "Fine, then just get these out of my sight and don't make the same mistake again!"

"Okay, okay," Yamamoto grinned, "Can I put these in our room? Maybe I can use the petals to make the place more romantic… yeah… I bet petals are perfect! Like the last time we borrowed Hibari's whip! Remember when you-"

"BAKA!" The storm Guardian slammed his clipboard upside Yamamoto's head, "DON'T SAY THOSE THINGS IN PUBLIC!"

"Oh sorry, sorry… don't be mad Gokudera…" Yamamoto noticed the red-haired Shimon and quickly changed the subject, "Hey Enma! What's up? Where's Tsuna?"

Enma Cozart smiled, "Hello Yamamoto-san… Gokudera-san… Th-thank you for doing this for us. Tsuna-san is in a meeting right now…"

"Meeting?" Gokudera looked up from the clipboard clutched in his hands. He examined Enma suspiciously from behind the clear frames of his glasses perched upon his nose, "I don't remember scheduling a meeting today."

Enma shrugged, "Tsuna said it was important for the allies to come together during this meeting. Hibari-san called for him about ten minutes ago…"

Yamamoto thought for a moment with perplexity on his face, "Well, if Hibari knows about it, I'm sure its fine Gokudera."

"Yeah…" Gokudera looked far from convinced.

Yamamoto stares at his lover intensely and suddenly his mood brightens, "Hey how about you show your plans Gokudera? I'm sure Enma wants to know all the details!"

Gokudera blinks blankly for a moment, his thoughts in a jumble, "Ah… Right! So I set it up where Jyuudaime enters over there," Gokudera points at the grand double doors opening to the hallways of the mansion and into the ballroom. Yellow sheer material skirted the doors and ribbons adorned the edges of a long aisle leading up to where the three stood. Gokudera adjusts his glasses and brings Enma's attention behind them to a beautifully decorated arc delicately weaved with blue roses. Enma stared in awe to take in the meticulous attention to detail. A golden replica of the Vongola crest proudly brandished itself beside the checkered Shimon coat of arms, "You'll be standing there with your family and Lal-san waiting to take your vows."

Enma swallowed back a heavy feeling in his chest, "Thank you… Gokudera-san-"

"Don't thank me, I'm not doing to for you," The Storm Guardian snapped though the obvious flush on his cheeks said he was more then pleased with Enma's gratitude, "As long as I can make Jyuudaime happy."

Enma smiled, "Then all the same, thank you for making him happy Gokudera-san. We could never have done it without you."

"Hmph," Gokudera paid a bit too much attention to the words on the clipboard, "Well I'm not done yet. The decorations are way too far behind! Yamamoto! Make sure this place finishes up, I need to check up on the food."

"Hai, hai," Yamamoto snags Gokudera's jacket sleeve and places a peck upon his cheek only to get a whack in the head in return. "Don't work too hard now Gokudera."

The storm Guardian stalked out of the room, red-faced and muttering angry threats beneath his breath. Enma Cozart stared at the rain Guardian merrily humming to himself for a few moments before he could perk up enough courage to ask the question that's been nagging at him for awhile, "Y-Yamamoto-san… Do you think what we're doing… is it inappropriate?"

Yamamoto turned his attention to the Shimon, "What do you mean?"

Enma looks at his feet again, falling back to his old habits, "There's a war going on. Do we really have a right to have a wedding? Everyone's fighting out there and we're here celebrating something so trivial…" Enma grit his teeth. He imagined Julie, Adelheid, Shittopi-chan and all of his family that were important to him, all of them dead on the battlefield. "This doesn't feel right…"

"I love Gokudera."

Enma looks at the rain Guardian in confusion.

Yamamoto smiled, his gaze was steady and confident, "I love Gokudera with all my heart and soul. I would get married with him just to say he's mine. I would do it because I want to. Don't you want to marry Tsuna?"

"Yeah but-"

"Then that's all that matters right?" Yamamoto's smile broadens, "When you love someone you marry them, no matter where you are, because getting married is one of the happiest things in the world. It gives hope; it reminds us that there are things in this world left fighting for."

The Shimon gaped at the Guardian, stupefied with a new perspective. He never thought of it that way. Happiness. Yes, marrying Tsuna makes him happy. It gives him the same butterflies as when he knelt on one knee before the Vongola boss and asked him to be his forever. The type of happiness that can only be found when Tsuna's beautiful face was the first thing he sees in the morning.

Yamamoto clapped the Shimon Boss on the shoulder and laughed good-naturedly, "Don't worry about it Enma, this wedding isn't only for you and Tsuna, but for all of us. We needed something to look forward to, and a wedding is more then what we could ever ask for. Besides, Gokudera will kill us all if we cancel out now."

Enma laughed along with Yamamoto as if a great weight has been lifted from his shoulders. Just imagining Gokudera's raging face scared him, but Yamamoto made it seem so harmless it was hard not to laugh. "Thank you Yamamoto-san. I feel much better now. If you and Gokudera ever-"

BANG.

And then the Vongola house became a museum full of stone statues. Every pair of eyes was transfixed upon a single point of that single sound. That sound that every one of them were trained to know exactly where it came from.

A handgun.

But why? Where? Who? How? What?

Those very thoughts took a mere moment to completely run through the minds of every person in that room.

The moment passed.

And that's when the chaos began.

They ran as if there was nothing left to do but run.

"Where's Tsuna?"

A cold feeling of dread pressed upon Enma's heart. He turned corners, climbed stairways, ran through people he knew but cared even less about. He just needed to find Tsuna. He had to be sure he was safe. He needed to be safe.

Pure instinct and desperation led him to that room, but when he got there, it was already too late.

That moment Enma shared with his beloved seemed to have happened eons ago. The ghost of Tsuna's touch lingered faintly against his skin. That smell of sweet lilac was buried with the memories they created in the depths of darkness; mixing their passion and love for one another within each other's embrace.

The air shifted, and as Enma's eyes glows a brilliant scarlet, nothing else mattered but this new tear within the Shimon's soul. He heard his name being called, but the voices got lost within the roar of falling rubble and the thunder of cracks splitting the walls of the mansion.

"Close the door…throw the key…" He sang with his heart shattered to pieces. Blood pooled at the Shimon's knees while his fingers delicately brushed stray hairs from the Vongola's face. Tsuna never liked haircuts, "Don't wanna be reminded…don't wanna be seen…don't wanna be without you…my judgment's clouded…like tonight's sky…"

Someone shook the Shimon's shoulder, "Enma, he's gone. There's nothing we can do. We need to leave."

Another pain shot like poison into the boy's heart, "No… Tsuna's just sleeping. We can leave when he wakes… He needs the rest…"

"Enma!" The desperate Shimon cloud Guardian twisted the stricken Shimon Boss and pulled his attention from the cold body in his arms, "You'll die here, Enma! You'll pull the entire house down on top of you! We need to go. Now."

"Adelheid," Enma blinked, "But Tsuna -"

"Enma, he's dead. I'm so sorry. We need to leave, or you'll-"

"Tsuna isn't dead," Enma pulled away from her grip and cradled Tsuna's body to his chest, "Go away Adel."

"Enma…"

"How could Tsuna be dead? He promised to come back didn't he? He told me I could trust him… that's why… that's why…" Enma grit his teeth, "Tsuna can't be dead."

Another massive shift in the air crushed the foundation of the mansion into the ground. People were thrown off their feet and shouting at one another to escape; but its hard to leave when the person they love will be left behind.

"I trust Tsuna," Enma Cozato gazed lovingly at the body in his arms. The crossed pupils ringed by fiery scarlet emptied as the will to live disappeared from the boy's heart, "So I'd rather die now then live the rest of my life without him…"

Enma dropped unconscious.

What happened next was a blur to everyone's memory. With Enma no longer conscious it was much easier to get to the two bosses and rescue them both from the chaos. Kaoru took Enma into his arms and Tsuna's body was cradled to Ryouhei's chest. The families hurried from the mansion. Rubble fell freely, pillars crumbled, until finally, the Vongola Mansion was nothing but a pile of rocks and debris.

There's nothing worse in this world then losing something to live for.

White flowers fell on the funeral of Sawada Tsunayoshi. The world turned gray, and only the wind would care to whisper prayers through the forest treetops. He lay there within a bronzed casket painted black, embroidered with gold, and the golden insignia proudly displayed on the lid.

No one stepped forwards to say anything. The Guardians, the Varia, the treasured friends; every single one of those people blamed themselves for the death of their beloved Tsuna, but none felt more pain then the man who had the power to prevent his death in the first place.

"Enma," The tall, strong, beautiful Adleheid placed a palm on her boss' shoulder, "Do you want to say anything?"

Enma, dry-eyed and empty, looked at the people around him. Gokudera-san was on his knees, cursing his own life away. Yamamoto stood with his fists balled to his sides, teeth clenched, and his entire body heaving in silent sobs. Ryouhei-san wept silent tears, forgetting the manliness that he lived his life by. Kyoko and Haru-chan found solace in each other's company and the Varia watched stoically from afar.

What could he say?

Tsuna was a good man. Tsuna was the best friend anyone could ask for. Tsuna was strong and never gave up for his family.

But these are the things they already knew. No words needed to be said because Tsuna was Tsuna. They loved him for the things they remembered in their hearts.

A sudden memory resurfaced in the Shimon's mind, and a small smile crept across his face. It was the morning of February 14.

"Good morning, Tsuna-san," Enma greeted as the young brunette entered the classroom and sat down with a big yawn.

Tsuna blinked the tired from his eyes, "Good morning Enma-kun. Why is there so much pink and chocolate around? Did I miss something?"

Enma rested his head on his elbows and smiled fondly, "No, not really."

"Oh good," Tsuna sighed in relief, "I thought I forgot something important."

"Tsuna-san."

"Hmm?"

Enma pointed at the whiteboard at the front of the classroom. The message on it was so obvious, the fact that Tsuna missed it was pretty funny, "Happy Valentine's Day."

"Ah!" The brunette rocketed to his feet, "I forgot!" The young Vongola blushed and turned to look at all the chocolate-filled desks nervously.

Leave it Tsuna to forget all about Valentine's Day, but of course Enma didn't forget. As a matter of fact, he has been preparing himself ever since he realized his feelings were no longer friendly. There's no turning back now.

"Tsuna-san," Enma's heart quickened. His palms became clammy and he hoped he remembered his deodorant this morning, "Do you like someone?"

"Wha-?" Tsuna blushed wildly and self-consciously avoided the Shimon's gaze, "Ah uh-uhm… yeah…"

Enma nodded to himself and turned his head down so he can stare blankly at the swirling grains of his desktop, "Is it Kyoko-chan?"

"Wh-What? Where did you hear that?"

Enma's heart became a boulder in his chest, "Nowhere… I was just asking…"

Tsuna paused for along moment and finally retook his seat; his voice became thoughtful, "Well… I did like her once. B-But I like someone else now."

"Oh…" By mere chance, the moment Enma side-glanced at the boy beside him, their gazes locked and neither decided to look away, "Who?"

And that's when it was Tsuna's turn to smile, "Happy Valentine's Day, Enma-kun."

"Tsuna-san?"

"Yeah?"

Without breaking their gaze, Enma reaches beneath him and very slowly reveals to Tsuna a bouquet full of pink carnations and red roses held in place by a delicate yellow ribbon. Very serious, the Shimon held it out to the dumbfounded Vongola, "Please be my Valentine, Tsunayoshi-san."

Of course, Tsuna accepted it.

Enma would sometimes mention that day to his lover as one of his favorite memories they shared, but Tsuna will only insist on how embarrassing it was to have to carry around a bouquet of flowers in school all day. But they both agree that nothing could have been more embarrassing for both of them, then the day Enma decided to propose.

The Shimon had bought the wedding rings very much on a whim. He was passing by the window of a jewelry store and thought of how beautiful one of the bands would look upon Tsuna's finger. It was a very simple, but lovely ring with delicate golden weaving which later was embossed with the words of their vows. He went into the store, asked about it, and found that the ring was actually a wedding band that came with another to make a matching pair.

Enma was so excited, he practically ran home to take his chance and propose to his beloved. Why not? Why wait?

But when Enma arrived at the Vongola Mansion, the place was practically empty. He calls out to check if anyone was home, but he could only find Haru-chan.

"I think he said he'll be upstairs in the Conference Room," she said.

Enma thanked her and hurriedly climbed the steps two at a time all the way to the top floor. His heart was pounding, his adrenaline rushing with excitement. Enma got to the right floor, sprinted down the hallway and finally bursts in to the conference room with a big BANG!

"Will you marry me, Tsuna?" He blurts all at once, a big smile on his face.

The room was dead silent for a moment. At least twenty different faces stared at him in shock. The entire family was there and Enma has just proposed to Tsuna in front of his father, the CEDEF, his Guardians, the Varia, and the Cavallones.

He gave Tsuna a wedding ring that day expecting happiness between them from then on. Even if the world was crashing down around them, he thought he and Tsuna will find some way to battle through it together like always.

Enma grit his teeth as he now stared longingly at the golden band upon his own finger. So many memories of Tsuna rested upon this little piece of jewelry, Enma couldn't bear it. He couldn't live like this. If he stopped Tsuna from leaving when he saw how weird he was acting… If he was at his side during the meeting… If he got there faster… If Enma didn't let him go like he did that day…

"Adelheid," The Shimon Boss choked, "We need to leave."

His entire family turned to him in shock. Adelheid placed her hand on his shoulder, "Are you sure?"

Enma nodded.

She stared at his blank face intently, "Enma, it wasn't your fault."

He said nothing.

She grit her teeth and pulled him into a hug that was very rare for her, "I'm so sorry, Enma."

Enma nodded and buried his face into her shoulder. He was taller then her now, but Adelheid will always be that special big sister to him.

The Shimon Boss never returned to that grave.

[After the Future Arc…]

He was back again. The tall trees crowded tight around his casket, preserved in time by beautiful workmanship. He trailed his fingers along the golden trimmings and paused to stare at the small silver band around his finger. He closed his eyes to the pain in his chest and listened to the whisperings of the wind.

"Jyuudaime, welcome back."

Tsuna's eyes opened and smiled openly at one of his fondest and most eldest of friends, "Gokudera, what are you doing here? I thought you would be with Yamamoto."

Gokudera shook his head, "I… I was worried about you."

An expression of sorrow flitted across Tsuna's features, "Thank you Gokudera. I just… I just can't believe someone I believed in so much could be gone. I can't accept it."

"Neither could he," Gokudera smiled sadly, "Neither could all of us."

"But I never expected any of you to die for me," Tsuna grit his teeth, swallowing his sobs, tears trailing down his cheeks, "I told him to trust me. I told him to wait for me!"

"Jyuudaime…"

Tsunayoshi ignored him and clenched his fist against his eyes, his back hunched, "Why would he do this? Why would he just throw his life away from me? Who does he think I died for in the first place?"

Gokudera watched with his own guilty inner-demons and the anguish that he can do nothing for his Boss but to be there for him, "Jyuudaime, I can't answer those questions, but I got a letter for you to read."

Tsuna sniffed and accepted an envelope with his name on the back. His face immediately turned to shock, and then aghast, and finally to pure hunger as the contents took form before his very eyes. It read:

To my Beloved Tsunayoshi,

I am only writing this letter to you because even though you are gone from me; I still have words that are left unsaid. Every single day brings me pain and sadness when I have to force myself to wake without your lips beside me to kiss. I really can't do it anymore, Tsuna.

I have kept my promise, of course, to dance without learning the proper steps to this song you've given me to dance to. I dance… and dance… and dance… and dance until it seems I now have gained too many blisters, so I can dance no more. I've decided I'm never going to dance again without you.

So Tsuna, how's heaven? Oh wait, don't tell me, I want it to be a surprise. I feel a bit guilty now though because I let your garden become overrun with weeds. I tried, I really did Tsuna, but it seems I don't have the loving touch to nurture something so fragile and precious like you can.

Yamamoto proposed to Gokudera last night. It was no surprise, but Gokudera seemed as clueless as ever. The wedding will be on the third Saturday of this month. I really wish them a long and loving life together. Hibari-san… well… nobody knows what Hibari-san does these days. We really don't see him very often. Oh, and Lambo got a girlfriend the other day. An actual girlfriend! Kyoko-chan invites her to eat cake with Haru-chan every weekend. She's a really nice girl.

I can go on and on, Tsuna, of how well everyone has pulled through your passing. It's still hard though. We all wish you were still here. We all want to smile with you Tsuna. We miss you.

So I guess I'll be joining you soon now. If you don't get this message before then, I'll just wait for you in the loneliest spot in heaven I could find, just for me and you. If you don't know, just remember I'll be the one with the smile on my face and a ring on my finger.

I can't wait.

Till we meet,

Enma Cozato

P.S: I Love you.