Summary: As a teen with superpowers, you learn to expect the worst. There's some things you just don't imagine, though, and those are the ones that remind you that you're still human, and that you just might not ever be strong enough after all. Angstfic, non-graphic themes of male rape.

Warnings: Nothing explicit, but this obviously deals with troubling themes such as rape. Will also feature heavy angst, depression, mild drug use, and eating disorders.

Notes: This was partly inspired and is pushed along by listening to Blue October, hence the double-meaning for the title and the tidbits of lyrics present at the beginning of each chapter. However, the idea mostly came because I got to talking to some people who've been through this kind of thing a few months back. I guess you can call this an awareness or survivor story. Also, Danny is sixteen in this. Set before season three.

I hate writing in first person (ironic, considering I couldn't write in third person when I first started writing), but it's necessary for this story. Think of it as a diary. I suppose it's good practice, though. I'm also used to writing longer pieces, but this story will have quite short chapters. They'll probably be a relief, especially given the wearisome content, so no, they won't be getting longer.

That said, let's get on with it!

Chapter One

In the day by day collision called the art of growing up, there's an innocence we look for in the stars."

It happened on October 20th. Or, given the time, October 21st.

I grumbled under my breath as I made the long trek back to Fenton Works from Sam's house. The plan had been to sleep over at her place with Tucker for a long night of watching gory movies in her basement, but her parents got home early and kicked us out, thanks to the too-loud TV giving us away. So much for a nice, ghost-free Saturday night.

And, of course, I couldn't even fly back because of this stupid ring!

I love my parents, but I really wished they'd find something else to do besides inventing things that made my life harder. After getting kidnapped by Skulker at school for the umpteenth time, Mr. Lancer apparently started to catch on for once and let my parents know about my little "problem" of ghosts always being after me with a vengeance. And, being the ghost hunters that they are, they'd whipped up this little silver ring with the Fenton seal that would repel strong ectoplasmic signatures.

At least it didn't work like the Specter Deflector. It didn't hurt me unless I used my ghost powers. Something about it not having subtle ectoplasmic detecting... stuff. I wasn't sure, it was kind of hard to pay attention when Tucker explained these things. But we had found out the hard way that I was, for the time-being, very much human.

Which, again, was the reason why I was walking the two miles back to my house on foot. At one in the morning. While it was twenty degrees outside.

I wrapped my jacket tighter around myself and looked up at the black sky. Looking to my left, I saw that I was passing by the big college parking lot I could probably cut through to take a couple of blocks out of my walk.

"Stupid ring," I muttered to myself through chattering teeth as I speed-walked under the streetlamps of the empty parking lot.

There was only one car there, an old Chevy, but as I drew close to it I noticed there was someone sitting inside. I felt a little uneasy glancing at what appeared to be a man inside looking back at me, but I didn't dwell on it as I walked past it. At least it wasn't a ghost.

The sound of a car door opening made me tense, and out of instinct I stopped and looked behind me in a defensive stance. The man got down from the car, coming towards me, and I fleetingly noticed he was built almost like my dad. Thinner, but still tall and bulky. I mentally scolded myself for not having kept walking and looked ahead again. Before I could be on my way, he spoke up.

"Hey, you got a smoke?" he asked.

I shook my head, turning back to face him. I was surprised when I saw he wasn't even two feet away from me, now. I suddenly felt even more nervous because I couldn't see his eyes through the dark sunglasses he was wearing. Seriously, who wore sunglasses at night? "I don't smoke," I said.

He nodded, then asked, "Got any money, then?"

Alright, and the ultimate creep award went to...

"No, sorry," I answered.

Like some sort of sixth (or seventh) sense, I automatically knew what was going to happen before it did.

"You sure about that?" he growled out, taking two quick steps forward. He grabbed me by the collar of my jacket with one hand and held a handgun he'd drawn out of his pocket with the other. His breath smelled like some gross combination of alcohol and cigarettes, and I had to stop myself from gagging.

Awesome! The one time I didn't have my powers was the one time I managed to get mugged in the middle of an abandoned parking lot! Still, not feeling up to fearing for my currently very mortal life, I took out my wallet and practically threw it at him.

He let go of me, but he didn't point the gun away. The guy somehow managed to search through my wallet with one hand while still cocking that stupid gun to my head with the other. He took out the measly ten dollar bill I had in there, but paused just when I thought he was going to let me go.

Again, he grabbed me by the scruff of the neck, and I couldn't help but feel annoyed in the back of my mind. Fighting ghosts had really desensitized me to things like this. Especially when this guy didn't even have supernatural powers or anything. Stupid thinking on my part, when I had no powers myself at the moment.

"Daniel Fenton? As in Jack Fenton's son?"

"Uh..." was all I could manage, caught aback by the crazed look on what I could see of his face.

"As in the Jack Fenton who blew up my house on Lincoln Street while chasing the ghost kid, and the reason I'm living in my car?" he snapped, disgusting specks of spit flying at my face. Oh, this was so not good. Grudges were never, ever good news for me.

Not good indeed. The guy moved so fast I didn't have time to react. He pretty much tossed me like a rag doll against the car and pinned me to the door. My breathing picked up and I looked at him with wide eyes as he pressed that gun hard against my temple. He looked so mad that I could easily picture him pulling the trigger, my brains splattering all over the car and the pavement. At that moment, it finally sunk in what kind of situation I was in. For the first time, I felt scared.

"P-Please! You don't have to do this," I whispered. I could hear my voice breaking out of fear. I'd never felt so vulnerable in my life, and after being Phantom for so long I never expected to. At least not against a human. Not like this.

I closed my eyes and counted to ten in my head in an attempt to remain calm, but when I opened my eyes the man's face was inches from my own. He had a crooked grin on his face. I couldn't help but stare back and felt my pupils practically trembling in my wide eyes.

A whimper slipped out when I felt the gun move, but the man only dragged the gun down my face until it was resting at my neck, leaving me to stare at it in dread. The change of target didn't make me feel any better.

I heard the guy chuckle and he said, words slightly slurred, "You know, boy... You have quite the face. Big doe eyes, girly little figure. Stick you in a dress and some might call you pretty. You remind me of someone, you know?"

What...? I didn't know what he was talking about, so I just knit my eyebrows and didn't say a word. I mean, there was still a gun being held under my chin, after all. I wanted to turn intangible, to hit the guy with an ectoblast, but chances were I wouldn't even get past reaching for my ghost core before I fell at this guy's feet getting shocked by the ring.

"I... Look, I don't even agree with hunting the ghost k-kid," I began, trying to keep my voice level despite the cold and how nervous I was. "I'm s-sorry about what happened to you, b-but killing me isn't gonna solve anything!"

The guy nodded, but his quiet unnerved me. Still, he'd nodded and he looked like he was thinking about what I said, so that had to be good news, right?

I saw his face come closer, and then all I could taste was beer and nicotine. The shock registered immediately and I began to writhe underneath him to try and get away from the disgusting kiss.

I couldn't even move under him, but I somehow managed to deck him hard in the cheek. The second he flinched aside, I took off running. I hadn't even gone three feet before I felt a hand grab me by the back of my jacket and throw me towards the car. I slammed into the side of the trunk stomach-first and felt the wind get knocked out of me.

Coughing and wheezing I shakily tried to stand up, but a strong hand pushed me down. My hands were crushed under me and his arm was pinning my upper body painfully against the flat surface of the trunk. Then I felt a fist hit me right in the middle of my back, making me cry out in pain. He hit me and kicked me I don't know how many more times while keeping me pinned down. I'd never felt more helpless. All I knew was that it freaking hurt, and my eyes were tearing up as I grit my teeth to bear it all before he finally stopped.

I could feel him behind me, his knees keeping my thighs pressed against the car. I was completely trapped. My breath caught as I realized that I was probably going to die tonight with no way to fight back.

In desperation, I began to struggle anew and screamed for help, not caring if he hit me again. I'd been dealt worse. A blow to the head with something hard made me stop against my will as everything went black for a fraction of a second. Disoriented, I looked to my right only to see that gun pressed against my head yet again.

"Shut up and don't move," he said gruffly.

I was on the brink of passing out, my breathing erratic and so many thoughts going through my head that I thought I couldn't keep up with myself. This was Amity Park, this stuff didn't happen here! I was Danny Phantom, the town hero! I couldn't just get my head blown off in the middle of the Amity Park Community College parking lot!

I had to try to get out of this. As a last do-or-die resort, I tried to go ghost. The ring, though – that stupid ring! A series of painful shocks went through me, leaving me flailing and trying to get my hands to move to rip off my ring finger if I had to, until an elbow to the back made me choke on my screams and left me panting between the car and my soon-to-be killer.

Suddenly, my ears picked up the sound of a zipper coming undone. I noticed the gun wasn't pointed at my head anymore, and then I felt the rustling of clothes behind me.

I froze. I literally couldn't move. Like sleep paralysis, my brain refused to tell the rest of my body to cooperate, even as I felt him pull my hips back and reach for my belt buckle.

It finally dawned on me what was happening. He wasn't going to just kill me. He was going to rape me.

"No. P-Please! I d-didn't do anything to you!" I whispered, my voice strangled as the fear kept me from doing much else.

"Shut up," the man commanded in a frighteningly calm voice.

I felt freezing cold October air hit my bare skin, and I had to swallow down the bile that rose in my throat. "I s-save your ass on a daily basis! W-Why are you doing this!" I hissed, my tone sounding hysterical to my own ears.

He paused. I felt his breath right behind my ear from above me as frightened tears pricked my eyes. "You brought the ghost menace here! You looked for them and they came! What, you think what you and your family do is saving this town? Think it makes you heroes?" he said mockingly. "Look where you're at, little boy! You can't even save yourself!"

A dry sob was all that came out of my mouth in response.

He pressed the gun to my head loosely once again. A sick shock descended over me as I tried hard to stop the dizzying, hyperventilating breaths I was taking and the jumbled pleas I could no longer control spilling incoherently from my mouth. I felt tears spill from my eyes as that same shock continued to sink in.

I felt movement behind me. Then, I shut my eyes tight and braced myself.