I've been wanting to do this for a while now...

How does Percy feel about his cousins and girlfriend in actuality?

Okay, it might not be downright realistic...it's kind of OOC, I guess.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Percy Jackson, his troubles, his awesome water powers, or his sliced-open panda PillowPet.

i:Lightning

She catches us sleeping with each other on a little sandy cliff overlooking the beach. We have long since dozed off, listening to the rhythmic pounding of waves against the rocky shoreline.

So she, being the utterly evil person she is, takes a snapshot of the scene and silently walks away.

I'm probably still snoring away when it happens, completely oblivious to the embarrassment that is coming fast towards me, in a riptide. Which is kind of ironic, since my own sword claims that name.

For a girl that has entirely sworn off all kinds of love, she sure is one to gossip about things pertaining to Aphrodite.

As it is, the picture is circulating around camp by the afternoon of that very day.

People keep on shouting out very flirtatious comments about Annabeth and I. Needless to say, my face is burning a red that Ares would have been proud of—in embarrassment.

As for me, I'm staying locked up in my cabin, trying to get over the utter humiliation she has brought crashing down onto me.

Somebody taps on the window. I remain buried under my covers.

On a second thought, I pull myself out of my bunk and yank open the door. "What do you want?"

"To comfort you."

Oh gods. Holy Poseidon. The voice from my nightmares has arrived. Then:

"You really didn't have to ruin my life with that picture, you know."

"I know," she says teasingly. "It was amusing to watch."

I huff and stomp out of the cabin for my appointed therapy session.

That's how Thalia Grace acts.
Which just proves that she is a complete lunatic.
...*Sighs*...
But I guess that's what makes her bearable.

ii:Death

"I hate therapy sessions."

He is gloomily sitting on a hard-backed chair, his back hunched over, his shaggy black hair falling over his face.

A pair of tiny, perky spectacles are perched on my nose. I try hard not to sneeze as the glasses tickles the tip of it.

"Well, I don't like being the therapist." Dammit! Stupid glasses...

"Okay," I say in my best "therapist" voice. "Why are you even at a therapy session?"

"Stop looking at me like that!" he complains.

I blink in confusion. "I'm just looking at you."

"No! You're staring at me."

"Boo-hoo, staring, big difference," I mumble. "Why are you even at a therapy session?" I repeat.

"Who made you the therapist?" he shoots back.

I blink and lower my pencil onto the clipboard: Anger management problems.

"When did you start having your...'issues'?"

His mouth promptly becomes unhinged. "I never had any problems!"

Which brings us back to the original question.

Nico di Angelo is a nice cousin.
(Most of the time.)
But, he cannot seem to answer questions directly.
Which makes him downright annoying.

iii:Air

I'm sitting with him near his sister's pine tree. Even after a year running between here and Camp Jupiter, I doubt he knows that Thalia was once a botanical sensation.

"How's your day going?" he asks.

"Terrible," I mutter. "First, I happen to get caught by your sister on tape, snuggling with Annabeth on a beach, and then, I am in a forced therapy session, with me being the therapist, with Nico di Angelo. The only thing I got down was that he had anger management issues."

He is silent for a moment. "Good luck with that."

I punch him, but I'm grinning. "Ah, shut up." Then, I groan. "I wish that I could get away from both of them sometimes. They're just so..."

"Well, I don't really know Nico very well," he says, "only that he's an ambassador to Pluto. Or not."

"He's moody at times," I say, "but he's a good kid. Thalia, on the other hand...oh, gods."

"What?" he queries.

I shift. "The only thing I can say, is, she is a complete lunatic. I think that she's ditzy in the head."

"Oh, come on." He slugs me. "Give her a chance."

"Dude—I've known about her ever since I got to camp, which is about five years ago. Well, I only met her when I was thirteen, but that hardly matters. I say that I've given her plenty of chances."

He stands up and hauls me along with him. "Well. Looks like you're going to have a therapy session with me. Don't worry, I'll try to be patient."

And that's the funny thing about Jason Grace.
It appears that I like him more than, say, my fellow Greek cousins.
I don't know. Honestly.
I think I can handle a therapy session with him...

iv:Wealth

How was the therapy session, she asks.

What to say...

Does she mean both of them?

The first one with her brother sucked. The second one with my Roman cousin was slightly better.

"Do you like Camp Half-Blood?" I attempt to make casual conversation.

She shivers and looks down towards the woods. "I don't know. I still think I like Camp Jupiter better, which is crazy. But I have to admit...the food's prime."

I nudge her. "Too bad we don't have shrimp gumbo, huh?"

She smirks at me. "Honestly? Ever since Gaea was defeated, and my curse lifted, I don't have a reason to be...you know, despondent all the time. And, hey, I can still summon riches from the ground."

"Okay, I'll put in an order. Two tons of twenty-four karat gold, please."

"Percy!" She lightly swats me.

"What? I'm putting an order into your business!"

She huffs, although she's smiling. "I don't have a business, and I never will."

I laugh. "Well, then, are you planning to buy all of Berkeley Hills? You certainly would have enough, and over nine thousand dollars left over to buy, say, a Jacuzzi for me."

She pretends to look shocked. "Hey, I'm not that evil!"

You were never, I think. You never were...

There's nothing I can really say about Hazel Levesque.
She's kind, caring, compassionate...
The nicest child of Pluto I've ever met...
Although, she needs help training Arion from biting people's fingers off.

v:Wisdom

After the failed therapy session with Nico di Angelo, not not-so-failed session with Jason Grace, having a nice conversation with Hazel Levesque, and being publicly embarrassed by She-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named—I know, I have wonderful Greek cousins—I seriously need a med patch that reinvigorates slightly depressed and very confused people.

Thank the gods I still had a girlfriend. Hopefully, she won't kick me out of the Athena cabin again.

I shiver as I glance up at the owl, always feeling as if it is somehow following me with its onyx eyes.

"Percy?" She steps in front of me, immediately quenching my thoughts. "What brings?"

"Well," I say, "I had a failed therapy session with Nico, and Thalia made a fool of both of us in front of the camp."

"Eh." She sighs. "Oh, well. What's done is done." She throws me a glance. "Although, it was kind of disconcerting to see that picture. It looked like we were going to both roll off the cliff in a second."

I make a sound that is halfway between a laugh and a sigh. "At least we would still be together in death."

"Mmm..." She rests her head against my shoulder. I tuck her curly blond hair behind her ear.

"Ooooh!" somebody squeals behind me. An outburst of giggles sound, and Annabeth's head shoots up from its resting place on my shoulder. My cheeks begin to color once again.

Rose Lopez from the Aphrodite cabin is leading a battalion of her siblings, all of them squealing and giggling, although some of them are just applying mascara. "That is so cute!" she screams, and then dissolves into laughter once more.

She whispers to me, "This is why I hate doing public displays of affection."

I shrug. "So long as I'm with you, I don't care."

I love Annabeth Chase, I really do.
We've been through a lot with each other...
Near-fatal quests, public humiliation.
Doesn't matter.
'Cause I love you.

vi:Consequences

It was Thalia, of course, who discovered us asleep on a shared blanket, and the daughter of Zeus didn't waste the opportunity; recall that the afternoon of the next day, she was waving around several pictures of the "sweet" couple around camp.

A few days later, she then realized what a foolish move that was, as Annabeth proceeded to embarrass her by recalling certain incidents from their years on the run, while I stood by and snickered.

Of course, Annabeth wasn't really mad, though she still wouldn't let her friend get away with making fun of her and me like that. But since it had been started anyway, Nico revealed some particularly funny childhood memories regarding Hazel, who scowled at her half-brother, and then Jason took off running after blurting out that Thalia had made a classmate cry on the first day of kindergarten.

Sigh. I don't know about you, but I love the last line.