Disclaimer: I don't own Kel or Neal or any tiny sliver of Tortall whatsoever. It all belongs to Tamora Pierce.

"Please stop me from banging my head against a wall," Kel begged, very quietly. Her eyes were closed, as if she could shut out all of her problems by ceasing to look at the maps and documents scattered all across the large desk in front of her.

Neal didn't dispute the request but took Kel's hand in his much larger one. In return, Kel squeezed his hand, entirely cutting off the circulation to Neal's fingers. For nearly a minute, the two sat there in silence, holding hands and trying not to think.

At last, Kel opened her eyes, feeling guilty. She and Neal weren't . . . involved. They never had been. Neal was in love with yet another hopelessly unattainable lady of the court at the moment and she, though between fellows, certainly had no right to ask for anything of that sort from Neal. She shouldn't have asked for his help, and she certainly shouldn't have accepted the token of comfort he'd given her, small and inconsequential though it had been. "Sorry," Kel whispered.

Neal took Kel by the shoulders and looked her seriously in the eyes. "No. Don't be sorry. What's the use in that? You needed something. I gave it to you. You and I both know what was and wasn't intended." He released her gingerly, as if he suspected she might fall apart without his support, but his eyes remained on her.

Kel felt relieved by Neal's assurance, but her guilt wasn't erased. "Even so. That wasn't mine to take."

Neal rolled his eyes. "You're my best friend, Kel. Everything I have is yours to take—including my affection, if you need it, in whatever form you need it. Don't you know that by now?"

Kel thought back to when she was twelve and had a crush on Neal. What she wouldn't have given to hear those words then! Even now, they touched her. Was she really worth that much to someone? "Thanks, Neal."

Neal blushed suddenly, cleared his throat, and shifted his gaze from Kel to one of the maps on the table in front of her. It seemed that Kel's gratitude, more than anything else, embarrassed him. He pointed to a strategic river crossing on the map nearest him. "So if the Tortallan troops cross here . . ." he said, seemingly attempting to change the subject.

Kel felt the urge to bang her head against a wall returning. She was far too tired for strategy. "Do we have to do this now?"

Neal looked back at her and smiled playfully. "Of course! The Scanran army will be upon us in five minutes if we don't figure out a way to overpower them right this second. Get your glave, Kel; we've got a war to win."

"If you say so, Master Neal," Kel joked back, trudging off to get her weapon. She would have put more spring in her step—there was nothing playful about a weary slog—but she really was too fatigued to move in any manner that didn't look like trudging.

Neal caught up with her easily and turned her around to face him. "C'mon, Kel, you know we can leave this for the morning if you're that exhausted."

Kel smiled weakly. "That sounds like a really good idea."

Neal's face suddenly contorted with concern. "Are you all right? Not sick or anything?" He made as if to test Kel's temperature with the back of his hand, but then he lowered his arm, apparently deciding to let her answer first.

Kel shuddered. She hoped she wasn't coming down with anything. Being sick now, with everything that had to be done—Mithros, that would be a nightmare. "I'm fine," she assured Neal. "Just tired. G'night."

Neal bowed mockingly, all jokes again now that he had some confidence in Kel's well being. "Good night and sweet dreams, Lady Keladry."

Kel gave Neal an unenthusiastic shove, too tired to do anything more creative. "Don't call me that." She yawned.

"G'night, Kel," Neal amended affectionately, giving Kel the one-armed type of hug around the head that they'd both become so accustomed to during school. "And I was serious when I bid you sweet dreams."

Kel yawned again. "In that case, thanks. Sweet dreams to you too."

As she stumbled back to her room and fell into bed, still clothed, she couldn't help marveling at how lucky she was to have a friend like Neal. Friendship was all she wanted from him, but he was a great person to have around, especially at times like this.

A/N: Favorites and reviews are lovely!