Hello! Haven't written in a long time mostly because of school being crazy. This one here is pretty sad but I've never been very good with writing stories that are complete fluff and happy times so I hope you like it anyway. I'm thinking probably three chapters, maybe more. It kind of depends on how it is received. This chapter is basically just background information.

Disclaimer: These character's aren't mine. Boo.

Thanks for reading!

-Lex

"I'm sorry, but it seems as though your pregnancy is no longer viable. The baby has died."

Kate walked, or more like stumbled, out of the elevator and towards her desk. Her mug sat near the computer, still steaming and full of what she assumed was decaf.

Decaf. Another reminder of what had just happened at the doctor's appointment. Taking a deep breath of air and trying to fill her body with courage rather than just oxygen, she continued towards the symbol of their dead child.

Castle was nowhere to be found, but judging by the warmth of her mug, he wasn't far. Still she was glad for the few seconds of peace before the inevitable task of facing him. Her shoulders slumped and she buried her face in her hands, trying to steady her breath.

Richard Castle. The father- or almost father- of her almost child. It hadn't been planned, that was for sure. They weren't even officially dating yet. They had only slept together once, that one night after that one case had finished and they hadn't wanted to part for the night just yet. The night when the singular glass of wine she'd had at his loft wasn't anywhere near enough to account for her lapse of judgment.

That's what she had called that night when facing him the next day- a lapse of judgment. She'd told him they'd never work, and that it had been a mistake, and she needed space. He'd stopped coming into the precinct. After two weeks of pushing him away, she finally admitted to herself that it was more than just a one-night thing. She had never been a one-night-stand kind of woman and she knew that this was no different. God, she missed him.

She'd gone to his house and he'd read the emotion in her eyes without a word passing between them. They had spent the rest of the night curled in each other's arms in front of the TV.

They'd been blissful for a few days, catching kisses only when Kate was absolutely sure that no one could see them. But mostly, they were too busy for anything else. The case was so action-packed and mysterious that it wasn't until she had to switch bags and found tampons at the bottom of her purse that Kate had realized she was late. A whole week late. She'd been late before, occasionally, when a case worked her to the ground, but never more than a day or two. But a whole week?

She'd freaked, obviously. She wasn't meant to be a mother. She'd always wanted kids but she was also very aware of the many late nights she spent at the precinct, the endless hours she spent with her paperwork, and the always looming murder board hidden away in her apartment, filled with pictures of her mother's last days. No, she wasn't meant for motherhood.

And then there was Rick. He would have been a great father, and she knew that, but it was too soon and she didn't think that he would want any more children. She had to tell him about the pregnancy though, and she did, but to her dismay and confusion, his eyes had positively lit up. Until she had confessed that maybe she wasn't going to keep it. Maybe. The word was enough to darken his eyes and for hurt to flash across his face. They fought for hours. At some point she had stormed out of his apartment and slammed his door behind her.

Rick hadn't backed down after that. Kate had been mostly cold, but she allowed him back into the precinct and he followed her around on cases. Always there, always helpful. He switched her coffee to decaf and covered for her when the boys wanted to go out for drinks. He ran after her and held her hair when she was reduced to vomiting from morning sickness at crime scenes. He even managed to sneak a pregnancy book into her apartment without her noticing him planting it right on the nightstand. She didn't have the heart to actually go through with an abortion while he was so busy doing everything he could for her.

What had turned the whole situation around was her dad. His advice never steered her wrong, and turning to him had felt like a last resort. But instead of being disappointed in her for getting pregnant like this, he had been disappointed in her reaction regarding the whole situation. They talked through her feelings, something she hadn't done with Castle. He hadn't let her run from the conversation, just held her while she figured it out herself. He had steered her into being more open about her prospective relationship with Rick, and she had winded up at the door to Rick's loft yet again, seeking forgiveness.

Since then, three weeks later, they'd been doing better. He'd been careful not to move too fast with their relationship and she'd begun to be excited at the prospect of having a child with him. Thrilled, even.

Until today. When the world had come crashing down again.

She'd asked to go to her first real checkup alone, and he'd sucked it up and consented. But she was regretting that now. Wouldn't it have been easier if the doctor could have broken the news to both of them at once? Then she wouldn't have to tell him all by herself.

"I'm sorry, but it seems as though your pregnancy is no longer viable. The baby has died."

The words of her doctor rang clear in her mind. So… clinical. Unfeeling. Heartless. And at that moment she had wanted nothing more than to hold his hand, to feel his comforting warmth around her.

So, now, sitting at her desk, she drew the paperwork from yesterday's closed case towards her. Because work was what she did best. The decaffeinated coffee remained untouched and quickly became too cold to drink anyway.

"Hey! Guess what? New case! Are you ready?"

It was fifteen minutes later and Castle was standing next to her desk, tapping his fingers on his chair in excitement.

"Esposito says the body's at a movie theatre. The ultimate murder. Hundreds of potential witnesses and not a single person reported seeing anything funny. How do you murder someone in a room that crowded without anyone noticing? What do you think? Good enough for the next book?"

She looked up, composing her face before meeting his.

"Uh… yeah. Yeah just gimme a minute to finish this page of paperwork. Why don't you go with the boys and I'll meet you guys there in 20?"

She looked down to the words on the page again, and continued to write. Silence filled the air.

His head swooped down to peer under her mask of hair, and his grin faltered.

"Kate?"

Yes? No? Maybe So? Reviews/constructive criticism are appreciated. Thanks for reading! Expect a new chapter pretty soon.