Disclaimer: All characters/settings belong to CLAMP/Kodansha and are used without permission and not for profit.

Dedication: Circe, as always. Sakura, for inadvertently pulling me out of my slump and then inspiring this bit of claptrap. Varon, Circe, and Sakura for telling me "Go ahead. Show it to the rest of FF.N"

Notes: There are a lot of cliches out there, aren't there? Well, here's a parody of them. I hope. Maybe it just sucks, but I've gotten the go-ahead from three authors I really respect, so you'll all just have to live with it. So there! :P lol

Confessing

Hiiragizawa Eriol looked up from his novel at the sound of a stack of books being dropped onto the desk in front of him. Daidouji Tomoyo stood in front of him, staring down at him with what might have been anger, if she hadn't been Tomoyo, the calmest, most gentle girl in school.

"Did you want me for something, Tomoyo-san?" He inquired cautiously. She wasn't normally agitated, but it was always possible it that it could be P.M.S. Xiao-Lang had taken to carrying aspirin with him any time he went out with Sakura or Tomoyo, and especially if he were out with both of them.

"You could say that." She glared just slightly.

"Oh. Well, perhaps if you told me your…" he wasn't going to say 'problem'; she looked ready to explode…for Tomoyo, anyway, "difficulty, I could be of some assistance." He smiled gently, closing his book and preparing to pay full attention.

"My difficulty? My difficulty, Hiiragizawa-kun, is you. I'm in love with you. And I've been dropping hints the size of elephants, and not those cute little baby elephants, either, that you should do something about that, but have you been paying any attention at all? Oh, no. No, can't be bothered to see that maybe Daidouji Tomoyo-san might like to be asked out, instead of having to do it herself. Mother would have kittens if she heard me say that, but I don't care. I'm a little old-fashioned, and boys are supposed to make the first moves, Hiiragizawa-kun! Do you know how long I've been waiting? Aren't you supposed to be brilliant? Aren't you supposed to be the maturest guy in the Tomoeda school system? Because I'd really like to know why you haven't confessed to me yet."

"I…"

"Oh, don't give me that crap. I know you're in love with me. Everybody in this room knows you're in love with me. The entire school knows you're in love with me. So why is it that I'm standing here confessing to you, when it should be you standing on my doorstep, blushing and with flowers in hand, confessing to me, Hiiragizawa-kun? Why is that? If you're so bloody brilliant, and I've been giving you hints so obvious that even Li-kun and Sakura-chan understood that I wanted you to try taking advantage of my innocence, why am I standing here confessing all of this?"

"Tomoyo-san, I…"

"I don't want to hear it, Hiiragizawa-kun. You had your chance to say something and you blew it." She glared at him again, turned around, and sat down.

Eriol stared at the back of her head, wondering what he was supposed to do. The rest of the class was watching them, and some of the girls were starting to giggle. The boys were giving him the "You are so screwed!" look that he himself had handed out dozens of times. Well. He certainly wasn't going to sit in here and take that kind of abuse. He stood, knocking his desk over in the process, and walked swiftly out of the classroom, knocking their teacher over on his way out.

Once he was alone in the schoolyard he conjured up one of every single flower he could think of and the most sickeningly cute stuffed bear in the entire world. "There. That ought to do it." He turned and marched back in, interrupting the teacher just as he was asking what was wrong with Hiiragizawa-kun, was he ill?

"Yes, Sensei, I am. I'm sick with love. Daidouji Tomoyo," he walked back to her desk, dropped to one knee, and presented her with his gifts (which had several of the other students in hives, thanks to their allergies), "I'm in love with you. Will you please go out with me this Sunday afternoon? I can't live another day without knowing if you return my feelings."

"Oh," she sniffled, her own eyes watering from her allergies, "how sweet! Oh, yes, Hiiragizawa-kun! Yes, I love you too and I'm not free on Sunday, could we try Saturday night instead?"

"Anything for you, darling." He kissed her hand and sat down in his seat, which someone had very thoughtfully picked up and set in order again. He glanced around and noticed that everyone was watching them again. "Well? Haven't any of you ever seen a man confessing his love before?"

Tomoyo glared at everyone and they all fixed their eyes expectantly on the chalkboard.

"I'm very glad you finally asked me out, Eriol-kun," Tomoyo whispered softly as the teacher began his lecture.

"Well, I'd have to be pretty stupid to miss seeing how you feel about me, sweetness."