Title: Anyone's Ghost
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: mild violence and gore (for lack of a better word); sexuality (Optimus/Ratchet; past-Optimus/Elita-One); no real spoilers for the series in general
Summary: TFP. "Don't... ask me to leave you. Please."
Notes: Ficlet written to a picture by interstellardrawingcenter. This is the pic: h t t p : / / tinyurl . com / 7b5sjn9 You will need to remove spaces to open it. Also, she even drew a couple storyboard sketches, so check her Tumblr out for 'em! In any case, SAD THINGS FOR EVERYONE! Kind of deviated from the art a bit, mostly in terms of setting, I think. A big thank you to Kateto-kismesis for helping me out by spamming me with sad songs and generally inspiring me, too.
Disclaimer: I own none of these chucklefucks.

Despite what others might have believed, Optimus was not immune to the pain of loss. Though he had lost many comrades and friends throughout the years, the pain never quite numbed. Like wounds to his spark, ripped open before they could heal into ugly scar tissue. Seeing so many of his people and loved ones die so needlessly in this terrible, seemingly eternal war both weighed heavy on his heart, and yet pushed him to keep moving forward, to find a better tomorrow and the end to this chaos and madness that had consumed so many beautiful, innocent souls through its wildfire.

Yet, this pain felt different. Optimus had experienced intense bouts of rage and the deepest of depressions, but there was something unique about this pain suddenly shocking his system. He was going to lose something he didn't think he could withstand. Arriving at the wrecked, ambushed Omega Base sent acid into his throat and stinging coolant in his optics. The attack came out of nowhere; devastating entire HQ. What was left of the old bunker was crumbling, little by little. Soon, it would collapse completely, to turn to ash and smoldering memories.

The Decepticons were ruthless. They seemed endless, relentless; refusing to step down, more and more came. They easily outnumbered the five Autobots, and Fowler's backup still wasn't enough. But they couldn't retreat, not when one of their own was stuck inside the ruins. Optimus tore through the debris, ripping it apart like tissue paper, adrenaline giving him a boost of strength he had not known was in him. Noises swam with the lights in blurs through his worried, fretting mind, spark thrashing anxiously, fearfully in his chamber, as he came closer and closer to the ever-weakening energy signature. He found himself soon running through the remains of the entrance tunnel, into the control room, where the ceiling was trickling and falling, close to the edge of complete destruction.

"Opt... imus? Th-t you?"

Optimus jerked his head upright, wide-eyed. He turned to the only light illuminating the ruins; the bright, sickly green of the monitors, still managing to shine like beacons in a stormy night. A familiar shadow was cast along the largest screen and angrily, quickly hefting and throwing aside chunks of cement and equipment, Optimus was soon kneeling beside Ratchet.

The Autobot medic had been the only one present at the base during the ambush. He found out too late about the Nemesis suddenly flashing to life above the base. Optimus received a warbled transmission, only a few words, and then white noise. He stopped everything he was doing and immediately raced back; moments later, Fowler informed him of the attack on the Omega Base.

Ratchet was propped up against what used to be plating on the ceiling. His white and red armor was covered in layers of soot and ash, surrounded by debris. Terrible gashes, cuts, and wounds criss-crossed over his body, dents and scars and cracks. One rather deep crag branching down the right side of his chestplates, exposing circuitry and equipment beneath. Ratchet was painted with energon, splattered haphazardly over his chassis, leaking and gushing from the deeper wounds. Two large boulders pinned down his crushed legs, and his right arm hung limp by his side, gnarled circuitry flickering like melting sparklers from elbow joints.

"Ratchet," Optimus breathed, spark rate increasing. He placed hands on his friend's shoulders. With a small cough, Ratchet's optics whirred with a growling noise back to life. His left optic was dimmer, cracked, and he could not open it more than an inch or two. He weakly turned his head with a grumble, looked into the Autobot leader's terrified, blazing eyes.

Ratchet smiled. "Good... Y-r a-ive." His vocalizer was ragged and glitching. The earth rumbled and he glanced upward. "F-r now. Get o- place g-ing t- b-ow."

"As soon as we get you out of here, old friend," Optimus reassured. He sounded calm enough, but his hands were shaking tremendously. He went to grab the boulders but then-

"Op-mus."

Optimus blinked and looked back. "What is it?"

Ratchet was still grinning weakly. "Too la-te for m-."

Optimus didn't quite register what Ratchet was saying. It took him a minute, and a rafter came down with a loud boom a few feet nearby. Then it hit him, and he glowered. "No. You're coming with me," he insisted, firmly, then went about removing the boulder. It was heavy, but he managed with a few tugs; he cringed at the sight beneath. Ratchet's leg had not only been crushed, but severed clean in half. He shook his head; no, had to work fast.

"N-o," Ratchet croaked. With much effort, he placed his hand against one of Optimus's windshields. "Le-ave. M'd-ne for." A small rivet of energon cut down his optic; he looked around him. "Two k-liks. Pl-ce fa- comp-. Can't wa-te more t-me." He shoved weakly against his leader's chest. "Go. Pe-pl nee- you."

"I told you," Optimus said harshly, "I will not leave without you." He went to the second boulder; an explosion from outside rattled above, an intact part of the ceiling caving in under the vibrations. Optimus grunted and threw himself over Ratchet; chunks of steel and wood crashed on his back, and he quickly apologized as his fingers accidentally slipped into one of the medic's shoulder wounds. Ignoring the pain, he sat back and shook the debris off with a growl; it was only until he heard the low hiss did he notice the fire nearby spark to life and quickly spread. In a matter of a single minute, the base was filled with smoke and flames devouring nearly half the remains.

"Go," Ratchet grumbled. He nodded to the tunnel. The fire was moving close to its mouth; soon, it would be too dangerous, the only way out set aflame and trapping them both inside. "Go!"

"No!" Optimus shouted, and it gave Ratchet a small chill. He looked furious now, the flames causing his armor to glow. "I am going to get you out of here!" With a snarl, he then shoved off the second boulder, quickly slipping an arm behind Ratchet's back. As he went to pick him up, Ratchet gasped and Optimus felt energon strike his abdomen. When he looked down, he saw the deep cut in Ratchet's side, close enough to slicing him in half. Optimus felt sick and froze momentarily in his shock and horror.

"Can't- Wo- ma-ke it. W-th me." Ratchet grit his denta, more energon pouring from his fatal wounds. He opened his optics and looked into Optimus's. Optimus was horrified, unsure what to do and Ratchet swallowed dryly. "Pl-s-... Go."

Air and smoke coursed violently through Optimus's system. His plating rattled. He felt he couldn't move - felt he didn't want to. "I... can't..." he finally whispered painfully. He kept his arm tight around Ratchet's torso. "Don't... ask me to leave you. Please."

Ratchet frowned, staring at his friend pitifully. "For th- oth-rs. Cy-tron an- Ear-th."

Optimus violently shook his head. "No!" he spat. He tried to find a way to pick Ratchet up without making the wound any worse. But nothing came to him; there was literally no way he could carry the medic out in one piece. He was nearly completely drained of energon and - Optimus turned his head back as rocks and wood suddenly piled around the tunnel. "We have to go. Now."

"No," Ratchet breathed. He glanced aside, but before Optimus could look, Ratchet drew him back with a small sputter. "Just... y-u."

Optimus studied the older Autobot's face.

He had lost countless of friends. People who meant the world to him. Ironhide, his best friend; Alpha Trion, his mentor; Elita-One, his old sparkmate, and when she died, their bond rippled and snapped and it was only through Ratchet's care and support that kept him alive when he thought he could not handle the sudden yawning emptiness of her absence, of the unique, deep connection they had made as one now gone forever.

So many lives had been snuffed and broken and extinguished before his eyes. He carried the loss and tragedies of billions of lives on his shoulders, and not one day passed where he didn't think about all of them. Ironhide, Alpha Trion, Elita, every single one of his soldiers and friends and the innocents simply there at the wrong place at the wrong time.

And yet, Optimus felt as if thousands of lives were dying in his arms, not just one. And his bond screamed and ached; it didn't want to suffer again. It took him centuries before he opened himself up to another. Before he allowed himself to form another connection as sacred as the one he lost alongside Elita-One. Ratchet deserved it; he deserved every ounce of his love and his patience, and Optimus was glad to have him and to be had.

But now, now it was starting all over again, and Optimus couldn't - wouldn't -

"Not... again."

Ratchet's hand soft and tender on Optimus's cheek forced open his stinging optics. "It w-ll be al-righ-. You ar- st-ong. It... will... be." He grit his denta and sighed. "... Okay."

Optimus gulped. "Ratchet - "

The explosion ripped through the base, a shock wave smacking Optimus upside his back, dropping the medic onto the energon stained ground. He looked back, and instead of seeing nothing but flames and death, Bulkhead and Arcee were suddenly reaching out, like hands guiding back the dead; Optimus grunted as Ratchet gave his chest one last hard shove. He didn't have time to fight or react, and then suddenly Arcee and Bulkhead were yanking him out.

"Ratchet!" Optimus shouted, struggling.

"Optimus! We have to go!" Arcee cried, her lip torn open. She looked back at the medic and then away, optics shutting. "I'm... I'm so sorry."

Before Optimus could fight, Ratchet cleared his vocalizer and said, as loudly as possible, "D-n't be a stub-orn a-ft. Y-'ll be f-ine!" He smiled - but it wasn't forced, it wasn't even that sad. Ratchet smiled and Optimus's spark nearly shattered. The fire burned and roared around Optimus as he was led back into the tunnel, and though he could not hear Ratchet's words, he knew what they were, saw them on his lips, and then Ratchet sat back against the slab, closed his eyes-

With another thunderous boom, the rest of the control room came crashing down. Optimus jerked forward, throwing out a hand as death fell around the smiling medic. "Ratchet!" he screamed until his voice was nearly raw. "No!"

A burst of flame blinded Optimus's vision, and as it fell back, he could see nothing. Nothing but debris and rubble, rocks and dirt, steel and metal. No sign of Ratchet and then, then suddenly Optimus found himself standing outside, watching the rest of the Omega Base finally collapse in on itself with a fiery groan.

The Decepticons had retreated. The sky bleed black and blue over the fading horizon, but the stars were hidden by big, billowing clouds of smoke. Optimus looked upon the ruins; his team said nothing. Fowler, alongside a few of his men, approached the group, but kept quiet.

Optimus stared for a long while before he braved opening his bond. Tendrils of ethereal energy reached out, searching for its partner - Nothing. There was nothing, as there was no signature or spark pulse to be accounted for. And though he remained standing firm and tall, his expression unreadable, inside, the warmth that once curled protectively, lovingly around his spark cracked and chipped away, until nothing but darkness replaced its shining glow.

END

I'M SORRY IF THIS WAS RIDICULOUSLY SAPPY BLARGH. sometimes i wonder if i'm being too gooey instead of poignant and touching. i wanted to keep optimus as much in character as possible, but i fear i might have made him a bit too emotional toward the end? i dunno.

i figure everyone knows what ratchet said to optimus before he died.

Title comes from the song Anyone's Ghost by the National. Doesn't entirely work with the fic, not really, but I was listening to it when writing (more specifically the Silver Swans cover), and it helped the mood. Sooo... For inspiration's sake, I titled this fic after it.