"Stop Touching Yourself!"

In canon, the warden can split himself into two people. What does he do with that power when he's all alone?

The Warden/The Warden

M/M, soloM?, selfsex

The warden entered his room and slumped with exhaustion against the door frame. Shrugging off his jacket and tossing his dress shirt onto a nearby chair, he ran a ran through his wiry black hair and let his pink cummerbund flutter to the floor.

He trampled over his dress pants and flopped onto his bed. Superjail had been overrun with giant bugs earlier, and it had taken all day to clear the yard of droppings and larva. He just wanted to relax and unwind.

With a nonchalant flick of his gloved hand, a cup of steaming coffee appeared in hand. He sipped it while mulling over what Jared had said to him earlier that day. The shorter man had burst into his office, sweating more than usual and breathing hard.

The warden had been engaged in some very important work, eyes glued to an array of screens showing Alice lifting weights from every conceivable angle. Once Jared managed to catch his breath he had blurted "Warden! The Twins are-"

"OW! Fuck!" Suddenly, his train of thought came to a grinding halt when he banged his elbow on the end table and splashed hot coffee all over his arm. He cursed and shook his hand quickly to assuage the burning. Watching his hand move too fast for his eye to follow, he suddenly had a very good idea of a way he could relax.

He squeezed his eyes shut and concentrated. By now it was easy for him to force his will onto the reality of his realm, but there was a time when it required a lot more effort and preparation. He felt his brain flex in a certain way, and suddenly he was staring at a perfect mirror image of himself.

Staring at his own gap toothed smile, he had the sudden urge to hug himself, and it perfectly mirrored the action. He looked into his own eyes and kissed his own lips. It was always a very odd sensation to touch a copy of himself. He felt the kiss reverberate on his lips. The touch of the other warden was real, yet he could feel his own lips pucker. It was like being in two places at once; like an echo.

He deepened the kiss, regardless. His hand casually reached up and caressed the other's bicep, feeling the action on his own as surely as if he had been touching himself. He ran his hand up to fist the hair at the back of his head, tilting it to get a better angle. The other hand sneaked over to his chest and lightly pinched the other's nipple and they both gasped slightly into each other's mouths.

With the same hand he unceremoniously pushed the other man over into the pillows and ran his hands all down his torso to his hip, delighting in the slight curves of the other. His arms knocked into his doppelganger's as they each pushed up against each other with need. With feather soft touches he teased along the other's inner thighs and along his pelvic bone. The other warden, holding his body up on his elbows, looked up to him with heavy lidded eyes and a devious smile, which the warden could not help but return.

He ran his fingers to the base of the other's cock, then suddenly gave it one strong tug and they both gasped. Already half-hard, he brought it to its full height with slow, languorous tugs. Without pausing his jerks, he lowered his face to the other's crotch as he felt the other move upwards towards his.

He licked his lips in anticipation, and slowly lowered his mouth down the other's length. He felt his own member engorge as the other did the same.

He knew what he liked, letting his teeth just graze the head and blading his tongue down the underside. He hollowed out his cheeks, sucking hard enough to vaguely hurt while squeezing his balls with his hand.

When he felt himself getting too close he gave himself a last lick at the precome collected on his tip and moved away with a little hesitation.

Wondering if what he meant to try next would work at all, he sat up and moved to lean over the edge of the bed. Unfortunately, he only felt the other's butt against his, while an undoubtedly pleasant feeling, not quite what he had in mind. He laid back down on the bed and offered his prick to the other, but rather than sitting on it, the other mirrored his position. A bit frustrated, he attempted to navigate his cock behind the other's balls, but they bumped into one another instead.

"This isn't working." They said in chorus.

Frowning at the interruption of their mood, the warden opted for a change of plan. He maneuvered them onto their knees and pulled their cocks together, drizzling copious amounts of lube between them. He held one side while his double held the opposite.. Slicked up and hard, their wet fingers added a kind of suction which felt heavenly. The air was quickly punctuated by twin groans and harsh breathing.

Using the other's shoulder for support, they slammed into one another, moving faster and faster until the warden felt as if he could burst. As he neared completion his hand shot out and grabbed the other's waist. Near frenzy, he found the curve of muscle between shoulder and jaw and sank his teeth into the flesh, muffling his groans as he came hard.

Panting, he fell back onto the bed. By time he opened his eyes, his breathing had lost its echo and he was alone again.