A/N: Please beat me, with all your might. I know, I haven't continued this in AGES, but it is finally happening, my pretties, and be prepared for a triple-post! :D Also, if you can point out the pattern I've been following with the chapters, you get a cookie. o3o

I miss Claude.

That probably sounds like a really dumb statement. You're probably thinking "Oh, but you have Claude right there with you all the time! You could see him anytime you wanted!"

But see, when you say that, you're wrong. I don't have Claude, he's nowhere near me. I'll probably never get him back again. He's most likely gone forever, like many others who've suffered his fate. I'll probably never get to hug him, to be tucked in by him, to be told he loves me ever again. Because Claude is gone.

Sure, that man, that body, that thing, that meanders through the door every now and again to watch a football game or yell at me to wash the dishes looks like Claude, but you have to believe me when I say that he's possessed.

It's not by the devil, or a demon, or some other strange creature. No.

Claude, my father, the man I once loved and cared for as if we truly were family, is possessed by Opium.

I'm not sure when it got started, but I remember when I started to see the change in him. It was gradual, not immediate, as expected. At first he would come home high every once and a while, and although I knew it wasn't good, I brushed it off as a little partying or a slight indulgence, something that wouldn't happen often. But soon he started coming in that way more and more, until it was every night. After I started hanging out with Ciel, I would often come home from his house late at night to find Claude unconscious on the floor, a drink in one hand and a handful of pills in the other. It scared me to the core, especially when it took hours for him to awaken, but I knew that if I told someone that everything would just spiral out of control. Not that it was in control in the first place.

It was the nights that I was at home, sitting beside this man that I once knew, my head on his shoulder and tears streaming down my cheeks, that I would look back on all the things we had done together, all the memories we'd shared. I thought of our trip to King's Island on our first summer together, and our Saturday ice-cream runs that used to be a tradition. I would think of all the times I'd beaten him on Madden, and the way he would hold me near to him whenever we watched a sad movie. He had been perfect, a type of father that even the most privileged children would find themselves wishing for. For three years, I had been the luckiest boy alive. I missed those days with everything that I had.

I used to tell myself that one day, Claude would realize his mistake, that he would finally go get help before things got too out of hand. But inside I knew that the man was too far gone to even think straight. He would probably never be the same, and no amount of counseling or therapy would ever make him my Claude again. I eventually came to accept it, to understand that my father was gone, and all I had to hold on to were the memories that made me smile on even the worst of days.

I remember the day I had finally confided in Ciel about the matter. I'd broken down in tears, and my best friend pulled me into his arms, rocking me back and forth and brushing my tears away. He told me that everything would be alright, that he was there and that I would get through it. It was because I truly believed him, that I really, completely trusted that he would always be there, that I made it through the ordeal without bringing harm to myself. Ciel is the reason that I am who I am today. He's the reason that I'm still here.

A/N: Short chapter. /: Sorry. But I felt the need to create an explanation for a question I hadn't really thought of before.

If Claude is such a horrid father, why did he adopt Alois in the first place?

So here it is, my darlings, the much awaited update, and hopefully an answer to one of the many questions that have arisen throughout the story (which will all be answered in good time, I promise.) I hope you enjoyed, and a new chapter will be up soon! :3