This was inspired by a Seinfeld episode, of all things. (The Subway, if you're curious.) It's not particularly funny or whatever, I just had to get it out of my head. One shot, at least for now.

The tall, dark-haired Imperial woman entered the city of Riften at midnight, confidently striding past the large man who yelled something rude at her and a pair of dewy-eyed lovers too engrossed in each other to notice her cutting their coin purses. Not bad, she thought to herself as she felt the weight of the gold inside.

When Caterina had left Cyrodiil, hoping for a rich country with less guards on her ass, she hadn't intended on heading to Skyrim. She'd wanted to head for Hammerfell, specifically trying to leave the Empire due to some issues she'd had with a member of the Elder Council. But then she ran into some trouble not long after she crossed the border, and when she escaped her cell in the small border town's jail, she fled Hammerfell and found herself in Skyrim. Although the country was supposedly in the middle of a civil war, its residents still seemed as prosperous as ever. It wasn't long before someone recommended she visit Riften, and so she had traveled there in hopes of better luck and fortune.

She made her way to the only inn in town, where she rented a room for the night from a harried-looking Argonian woman. The common room was packed, although unlike most other inns there wasn't an annoying bard playing the same few songs over and over. The noise of conversation more than made up for the lack of music, though, and it was loud enough that she could move around the crowd without attracting too much attention. If she was lucky, she'd find a rich and handsome merchant or nobleman to lure to bed, rob, and leave stripped of valuables before he woke the next morning. Ideally, she liked to prey on married men, because they were almost always too ashamed the next morning to report anything to the guard. The only problem was dodging the wife if she tried to clear out the house while the man was still asleep back in the inn.

As usual since she'd come to Skyrim, she ended up drinking mead while she surveyed the crowd. The first man she tried to flirt with, a blonde Nord whose clothing bespoke wealth, brushed her off with an excuse about being in mourning. The second man she spoke to, a balding man who looked fairly prosperous, made noises about needing to open his store in the morning and left. The night went on just as poorly until the crowd started to dwindle. She was cursing herself for overreaching instead of just picking a few pockets, and thinking about leaving after her bottle was empty, when a man she hadn't noticed before sat down beside her.

He was a tall, broad man, although not a fat one. His clothing was fine, but his fiery red hair was a bit greasy and unkempt and he looked a day or two overdue for a shave. She wasn't sure what to make of him, but given the late hour and shrinking prospects she figured she might as well try anyway.

She gave him her best smile as she straightened up and greeted him, turning her body his direction and leaning a bit forward. His eyes predictably dropped to her cleavage, although they came back to her face more quickly than she would've liked.

"Are you new in town, lass?" he asked her.

Lass? I think I'll leave this one tied to the bed. Naked. And then "forget" he's there. She kept smiling at him, though. "Just passing through," she lied. "I'll be leaving in the morning, delivering this message to Markarth." She patted her satchel on her hip.

"Ah, a courier then," he stated.

Oh, this one's a bright one, isn't he. "Aye, a courier," she affirmed. She looked into his eyes, which were a brilliant green, and leaned slightly closer to him. "It can be a little lonely, but someone has to do it, and it pays well enough." She could tell his interest was piqued by that-as she had intended, because what man didn't respond to a pretty girl saying she was lonely? Especially one who keeps flaunting her tits and scooting closer, like she was.

"So do you have a name, lass?" he asked her, his eyes flicking between her face and her chest.

Caught this one! she thought excitedly to herself. "You may call me Cat," she told him. "And you are...?"

"Brynjolf," he supplied.

How very Nord. She focused again, forcing herself to blush. "A pleasure to meet you, Brynjolf." She engaged in more small talk, throwing in innocent-seeming innuendos that seemed to both arouse and confuse him. Finally, blushing and dropping her eyes, she went for the kill. "Um, I don't normally do this," she stammered nervously, "but I was thinking...do you want to come upstairs with me?"

He smirked at her, no doubt thinking he'd managed some great coup by getting her to invite him to her bed. She was always amused by how men seemed to think that getting her in bed was some amazing accomplishment, right before she robbed them blind. Leading him by the hand, she took him up to her room.

Inside, he took the lead and kissed her, running his hands along her sides as their tongues met. He squeezed her butt, so she slapped his, making him grunt in surprise. She started pulling his clothes off, tossing them to the side in a pile where she could find them later, as he removed hers. A little thrill ran through her as his cock sprung free-she'd suspected a man his size would be well endowed, and she was not disappointed. She held it in her palm as they kissed again, her thumb running from the hole at the top to the underside of the head and back again, a bead of moisture forming almost immediately. He moaned lightly into her mouth, and she pulled him onto the bed on top of her.

"I want you inside me," she whispered into his ear. "I want you to fuck me, and I want you to come in me." He growled in response, and a second later she felt him enter her, gently at first and then more roughly as she bucked her hips to meet him. He filled her well, and when he pinched one of her nipples, she squealed and pushed against him. She felt his hand slide down between them, and his thumb found her clit. He teased her, slowing down when she got too excited and speeding up when she seemed to be getting bored.

"Please, please..." she begged him. It never hurt to flatter her marks, and often it helped bring their guard down further. "You're so big..." He thrust into her hard, making her grunt in pain and pleasure. She dug her nails into his back in response, which seemed to spur him on faster, and she writhed against him. " Almost...if he'd just...THERE! Her thoughts were disjointed as waves of pleasure washed over her and she felt his hot seed fill her. He collapsed onto her, breathing heavily and kissing her neck before sliding his weight to the side.

She would never conceive; she had paid a mage in the Imperial City a lot of good coin for that, and so far whatever she'd done had worked. Children were just not her thing, and other forms of prevention were annoying and inconvenient. As pricy as it had been for her at the time, she had never regretted it, and tonight was no exception.

After he was lightly snoring beside her, she quit pretending to sleep and carefully slid out from under his arm. He stirred, but resumed snoring after a moment, so she quickly dressed, careful not to make a sound. She unfortunately didn't have anything to tie him with, so she'd just have to leave him sleeping and sneak out. She scooped his things into her bag with her own and threw it over one shoulder as she reached for the doorknob.

Suddenly a hand was over her mouth and she was being pulled backwards. "Leaving so soon, lass?" he purred in her ear from behind. Dammit. She should've tied him up anyway, even if it was with his own clothes. She bit his hand hard enough for her to taste blood, twisted out of his grip and ran, taking the stairs in two big leaps and flying out the door a second later.

Outside she ran straight for the gates she'd entered earlier, not wanting to mess around with trying to hide in an unfamiliar city. She was almost out when he caught her again, this time grabbing her by the knapsack and yanking her down in one quick movement. She landed hard on her butt with a grunt, and he pulled her bag away from her. She heard the asshole who'd yelled at her a couple hours ago laughing; she wasn't sure if he was laughing at her or the naked man chasing her, but she would give anything to punch the bastard in the nose right now.

Grabbing her arm and pulling her to her feet, Brynjolf spoke quietly in her ear. "Unless you really want the guards involved, you'll come with me." He pulled her off the main road and into an alley and started digging through her bag for his clothes. She looked around for another way out, but he saw her and started talking while he was dressing. "Before you run away again, I want to make you an offer." Well, this should be entertaining at least. And maybe he'll let his guard down again and I can get the hell out of this town...