Camp Green Lake isn't exactly known for its entertainment. So it will not be a surprise to you when I say the D-tenters were bored.

"I'm bored," said X-Ray, Armpit, Squid, Magnet, Zigzag and Caveman, emphasising the point.

Zero didn't say anything, but he looked pretty bored. Then again, he always looked pretty bored.

"Let's go check the mail," Magnet suggested.

"Shut up, Magnet," Squid muttered.

"I have a better idea," X-Ray told him.

"Loot C-Tent? I agree. Let's go, boys!"

"No! But close. We're going to get something from the Warden's house!"

The tent's unofficial leader was met with the expected chorus of "You're insane!" and "Do you have a death wish?"

"Fine, I'll go myself! You pussies can stay here and be bored."

After X-Ray left the tent, silence reigned for a few moments.

"Anyone want to play I Spy?"

"SHUT UP, MAGNET."

After half an hour of pointless bickering and random Spanish curses, X-Ray returned. The boys immediately noticed his glasses were missing and his arms were full of...

Makeup?

"What gives, X?" Armpit's face twisted in confusion.

"I'll explain. I got into the Warden's place okay, she was in the shower. I could hear it running. As I looked for something good to lift, I tripped on the rug and my glasses smashed. I knew the Warden would notice, so I grabbed the first thing I could and got the hell out of there. But without the glasses, I couldn't see where I was going, which is why I took so long."

"Great story, but what are we gonna do with all this makeup?" Caveman asked.

"Wait, I stole makeup?"

"Yes. That stuff in your arms is definitely makeup."

X-Ray shrugged. "Then we'll give someone a makeover! Who volunteers?"

Silence.

"Anyone?"

More silence.

"Guess it's you, Zero."

"WHAT?"

The shock caused Zero to speak to X-Ray for the first time in approximately nineteen days.

The taller boy shrugged again. "You're the smallest and you have the longest hair. And no one volunteered. Now come over here and let me work my magic.

Zero scowled. "You're practically blind. If you insist on this, at least make it someone who can see what they're doing."

Armpit gasped. "Kid must really be pissed. He's speaking in full sentences!"

"Fiiiine, buzzkill. Magnet, you have a bunch of sisters. Why don't you give it a shot?" He handed the various makeup items to Magnet.

The Hispanic boy smiled. "This will be fun. Over here, Zero." He twirled an eye pencil menacingly.

Zero rolled his eyes and complied. After all, he could wash this off. And there was the possibility of revenge...

Magnet opened a container of blue eyeshadow. "Close your eyes," he told Zero.

After Zero's eyes were closed, Magnet dusted on the powder, purposefully making it way too thick. When the shadow was done, he moved on to extra-thick eyeliner, a ridiculous amount of blusher, an excess of mascara, and a LOT of scarlet lipstick.

"Done! Check out my masterpiece!" Magnet stepped aside to reveal his... "masterpiece".

After hearing applause from the D-tenters, Zero opened his eyes and asked Magnet, "What do I look like?"

"Have a look." The makeup artist gave Zero a hand mirror.

Zero screamed after seeing his reflection. "Are you a complete lunatic? I look like a sad clown hooker!"

"That's how my sisters put their makeup on."

"Can you picture the Warden wearing this stuff?"

"You know..." X-Ray said coolly. "Since Zero looks like a girl now, we should find a girl name for him... her."

"Anyone know his real name?"

"It's Hector."

"Thanks, Caveman. Okay... Hectora?"

"No. Maybe... Hectorella!"

"No way. Hectorine."

Everyone stared at Zigzag. "Hectorine? Really?"

"Is that even a name?"

"It rhymes with my favourite fruit: nectarine!"

"Whatever. How about Hectoria?"

"Hectorbelle!"

"Hectorina!"

"Hectorette!"

"What about Heather?"

The boys fell silent. This was the first name Caveman had contributed and, to tell the truth, it was the only suggestion that wasn't completely idiotic.

"That's a good one! Ya hear that, Heather? You got a new name!"

Mr. Sir interrupted the fun, as usual. He told the boys (and temporary girl) that dinner was ready and to move it. All of the boys filed out except for "Heather", who intended to get rid of the hooker makeup before anyone else could see. Magnet lingered behind to make one final comment.

"You know, that's a great girl disguise, but there's something missing."

"What?"

"I think we need to find you some..." he gestured toward his chest.

Seven hours later, Magnet woke up on the floor of D-Tent. His face inexplicably hurt.

While he would insist that he was hit by the tent door, even X-Ray noticed that the mark on Magnet's face looked suspiciously like the metal end of a shovel.

Heather was never seen again, though there were rumours about two female visitor named Roxy and Josephine...

The End