This is my first Buffy posted fanfiction. I'm working on some other stuff, too, so please keep that in mind if you enjoy this. Admitedly, this isn't one of my best stories, but my friend says I need to post it.

Warnings: Contains Spuffy, and onesided Splory because my insane friend asked if I ever read a Spike/Glory fic. When I said no, he said I should write one. So yeah, Glory developes a thing for Spike, which isn't too good for him. There's lots of violence, descriptive scenes, and and hurt/comfort. Takes place after Intervention and in Tough Love.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Loving is Tough

By wolfgal97

If you wanted to know what the word, "pain," meant, you could see a perfect example in the form of a vampire that calls himself Spike. The very word had become his existence. For some reason, he was always drawn to pain. He just liked in in forms that he could control. He was worst at dealing with emotional pain.

Today, he was dealing with a physical and emotional pain. One, he had no say in. To him, this fact added to the severity of the wounds that had been inflicted upon his battered body. Spike lay in misery upon a cold slab of rock while blood poured from him. His muscles ached and throbbed uncontrollably. Open cuts stung as they marred his alabaster flesh. You would be lucky to find a patch of skin that remained a somewhat normal color.

Spike was in pain. And it was all because of girls. Three of them, to be exact. They also all played a part in his emotional scaring as well. One of these girls, who had really done nothing to hurt the poor creature was named Dawn. She's usually a sweet little thing who looks up to Spike to help protect her. And protect her, he did.

Dawn was like a little sister to Spike. It's why he never really minded her being around him, or taking care of her when her sister asked it of him. He gave her teasing names like, "Little Bit," or ,"Nibblet." They were just his dumb boyish way of showing he cares without being too soft. After all, vampires don't typically make friends with little girls. They're usually just go about drinking their blood, discarding the carcass and moving on in their un-life. Spike wasn't like that. He used to be, but not anymore.

Dawn hadn't really hurt him anyway, and he would do anything to protect her. Today, he'd proved that. Every time he'd thought of giving up her name, he fought through the pain and held on for her. He could never betray his Nibblet. His mind couldn't even wrap itself around the thought. It wasn't possible to give his little girl up to that hellion, no matter how much he had wished for his suffering to stop.

Speaking of the monster, that brings us back to another female who'd caused Spike pain. This time, it was of the physical variety. Glory, the crazed hell god who's so bad, she wants to get back to her little home in Hell where she likes it. Spike wanted to shiver in an emotion close to fear that he didn't want to admit existed in him. No, it wasn't fear, but dread. Spike had given up most of his fears long ago. The ones that remained were not even close to the status that Glory had.

No, he didn't fear her. He just hated the bloody woman more than anything at the moment. It was her fault his body looks the state it's in now. After all she did to him he'd grown a healthy level of respect for her. Glory was like a fire. She, being a soulless monster, had enjoyed his pain while she cut him open, running the sharp blade down his exposed chest. No, Glory was like him in that way. She couldn't be tamed. Like a fire, you have to know what happens when you try to touch it. You get burned and you feel pain. You just know that that's what happens when you touch fire.

The only thing wrong with that argument is that she has somewhat of an excuse to feel no good emotions by having no soul. This is what confused Spike the most. He also has no soul, yet he's felt the most pure emotion that's possible to feel.

Love.

No, he's not mistaken. It's not something darker like lust or passion, but pure love. If the third girl responsible for his condition had only been an object of lust or passion, he would have given her and her sister up to end his misery in a heartbeat that he no longer had. He would have been free to leave his bonds and go find a new object to keep his attention.

But no, he couldn't. Because he felt something deeper than lust or passion for Buffy Summers, though those two feelings did come into play as well. He loved her; loved her more than his very life, which on a normal day, he prized very highly.

No, the true reason Spike was in such a sorry state so close to death was because of Buffy. Though she hadn't tortured him for hours on end for information as Glory had, she had been the true reason he suffered through it and was suffering now. His love for her made him want to protect her and her sister more than to live one more day of his dark existence. Though she would never believe him, and sometimes he didn't want to believe himself, Spike truly loved Buffy.

But he knew she'd never love him back.

It was another way Spike was like Glory. They both wanted the very thing that they could never have. Glory wanted the key to open up Hell, which happened to be Dawn, though she didn't know it. Spike had, though. That's why she went after him. She wanted the name of the key, but Spike had refused, no matter what, to tell her. All for the one thing he knew he could never have.

One kiss, not spell induced from Buffy would allow him to die happy. His whole body craved it every time she was around. But he knew she never would. Especially not now, with his swollen and cut lips. He wouldn't even be able to see her clearly if he tried because his eye was shut tight from being battered so many times.

No, Buffy would never love him back. She would never even kiss him. In fact, it seemed all she wanted to do was kill him. After all, she's a vampire slayer. How much more ironic can you get? So you may ask a very prominent question; why does the stupid vampire keep trying?

It's a question that even he doesn't have an answer for. Maybe it's because he likes a challenge. Maybe it's because he has a small hope that maybe she'll look at him with something other than hatred or disgust in her eyes. Maybe it was just for the simple reason that he loved her. He didn't know, and maybe he never will.

At the moment, it wasn't very important to him. What was important was lying perfectly still and not breathing to tear apart his healing lungs. They had been torn to bits by his broken ribs while Glory had mercilessly attacked him. Other than that, the only thing on his mind was Buffy, who seemed to always take center stage in there.

Think of the devil though, and her robot form will appear. Spike lay perfectly still as his robot created in his love's likeness flounced in, her blond hair bobbing with each step. She stopped by his side to gaze down upon him. Only the robot version of Buffy would look down on him with adoration as this one does. "Spike, you're covered in sexy wounds!"

He would have rolled his eyes if he could have, but even that hurt to move. Instead, he began to sit up as best he could. Even if she wasn't the real thing, the real Buffy, he couldn't allow himself to appear weak to her. Buffy was so strong, but even she would crack one day. And when that day came, she would go to the next strongest person for support. Spike sometimes prayed it would be him.

"Yeah, I feel real sexy," he managed to groan out. He figured if he was going to be in pain, he might as well be light about it. His whole life was pain. His existence was to deal with it. "Where have you been?"

His robot kept her happy tone, despite the fact the man, the vampire she was made to love was obviously hurting more than ever. He tried to ignore this fact. It's not her fault how she reacts, she's a robot. Besides, it was probably more realistic that way. The real Buffy would never care that Spike was hurt. In fact, she probably would enjoy seeing him suffer.

In some cases, Spike didn't blame her. He knew how he used to be. He knew he's said things he can never take back. Done things that he assumed people in Hell did while they were living. He knew he wasn't human. He knew he was a monster. And still, sometimes he wished she could see him as anything different. Maybe she could one day forgive him for some of his sins. Even if she never did, he'd still love her.

"I fell down and got confused. Willow fixed me. She's gay!"

Spike wanted to cringe, but he couldn't. His face was too mutilated. Why on Earth had he even gotten this thing? Other than having her face, it was nothing like Buffy. Buffy would have never said such pointless things. She would have punched him in the nose and moved on. It was just a thing that made the Slayer the thing she is. And Spike loved her more for it.

He loved his untamable Slayer. Though she was good and wanted to make the world better, she was dangerous. She's so wonderful, but not at all perfect. Strong in will and body, loyal to her loved ones, beautiful and tender. They were all her good qualities. But Spike would be the first to admit she wasn't perfect. No, she, like all living things, has faults. But Spike even loved those.

"Will fixed you? I thought they'd melt you to scrap," the vampire questioned. Every movement, every word hurt so much, he just wanted to black out again and maybe die while the lights were out. Not that anyone would care…

"They were confused, too. Do you want to ravage me now?"

Such a dirty question asked so innocently. Again, Spike found himself questioning his choice to have the BuffyBot made. But when he saw those eyes, so much like hers, so realistic, he knew that the closest thing he could have to his love was something he needed.

"Give us a minuet. Got some bones that need mending." Even if the real Buffy asked for a night of passion, Spike doubted his ability to "ravage" at the moment. All he could really think about was holding himself up so that he didn't fall onto the bier and damage himself any further.

The small pout that he got in response made him want to do anything please the girl. That's another thing Spike finds odd. He got the robot to have a Buffy that was willing to do anything to make her master happy. Now, the tables were turned and Spike found himself wanting to make an inanimate object happy. 'What the bugger is wrong with me?' the vampire asked himself.

A question that surprised the beaten vampire came from her. "Why did you let that Glory hurt you?"

It was a good question, and an easy one for Spike to answer, though it wasn't easy for anyone else to understand. After all, they didn't even understand the fact that he has undeniable feelings of love for Buffy. Though he could answer the question, no one would care about the answer.

"She wanted to know who the key was." It was true. And it was the bare facts of things. Spike didn't feel like going into emotional detail on the subject. He was too tired. All he wanted to do was fade into the blackness that was playing with his vision. He wanted to let it consume him so that maybe he wouldn't have to feel all this pain anymore. So he could just sleep.

The robot turned sharply on her heel, sounding chipper as ever with her solution to the problem. "Well I can tell her! That way you won't have to-"

"No!" She froze as the vampire burst into a harsh coughing fit that racked his body. He shivered, fighting back the nausea. Using the strength he had left, he pushed himself strait up again to face his robot that had turned around to look at him with confusion. "You can't, ever. Glory never finds out."

If Glory did find out, Dawn would be in danger. If something happen to her, Buffy would be hurt. Spike couldn't even think about his girls being hurt. No one messes with his Nibblet. Spike would protect that girl with his last breath. If Glory discovered who the key was, his pain and his silence would mean nothing. It probably hardly meant anything to Buffy, anyway. She probably only cared that her secret was safe. Spike couldn't help but think that.

Then came the harder question for Spike to answer. The one he didn't really want to answer. "Why?"

Spike had to think for a minute before he could answer her. It was obvious to his heart and mind to why he did it, but to form words to describe how he felt… well, that was a whole other matter entirely. The bloody awful poet was at a loss for words. Finally, they came. And when they did, Spike didn't care how much they made him sound like a poofter.

He spoke honestly and from his heart. "Buffy - the other… the not-as-pleasant Buffy. Something happened to Dawn, it'd destroy her. I couldn't live, her being in that much pain. I'd let Glory kill me first. Nearly bloody did."

His little robot thought this over for a moment. It amazed him on how realistic the thing looked. It even had that little line that formed between her eyebrows when she was thinking hard. He wanted to smile in the familiarity of it, but his face hurt too much. He just couldn't.

And the kiss that she gave him, though light, still hurt. His swollen lips protested under even the slightest most loving pressure they were under. The only thing that made the new pain swelling in him worth it was the fact that heat was coming from those real, soft pink lips. The robot could never feel as real as this. No, this was Spike's own Buffy kissing him. His real Slayer.

Surprised, he pulled away to look at her, to see what she was thinking. All he could see was a very solemn face. She hid her true emotions from him very well. To him, she was calm and like stone, strong and hard. In her own head, many thoughts overcame her. Panic, surprise in her own actions, happiness. No, happiness wasn't right. Her emotions were stronger. This was a feeling of ecstasy. One that she wouldn't let the vampire see.

She didn't want those happy emotions to be there. All she wanted that kiss to be was a "thank you." But even to her, it was so much more. She hated to admit it, but something almost primal in Buffy took presence in her when Spike was around. It sang to her to go to him. It was drawn to him. It reacted to everything he did. It was happy to be loved by him, but she herself was scared by it.

It was her nature to try to ignore love. Love was pain to her. Everything she loved either went away or died. To let someone in, someone as dangerous and unpredictable as Spike, would possibly end her ability to love if something went wrong. She just couldn't deal with any more pain from love. So she pushed Spike away. It was the only reason she hadn't given into that primal being in her asking her to kiss him, to touch him, to claim him as hers.

When Spike asked about his robot, Buffy told him what she truly though about that abomination. The look of shame that he had on his broken face played with her heart a little more. She actually even understood why Spike did it. If he loved her like he said he did, he would do anything to be close to her. If he couldn't have the real her, then why not go for a knock off?

Also, Spike was almost always alone. He wasn't a Scooby and all his vampire friends were gone. He wasn't even free to pursue his demonic nature inside him because of the chip that had been forced into his head. Buffy was grateful for the chip because it had forced Spike to change into something more than a monster. And because of that, she allowed some part of him into her life.

But the robot wasn't even real. It was sick. But, "What you did for me, and Dawn, that was real. And I'll never forget it."

Buffy couldn't stay there any longer. She couldn't stand to see the vampire she was beginning to care about so broken and bloody. She left his crypt thinking about how fast things could change. She had come here to kill a monster that betrayed them and had left feeling pity for something just barely less than human, to her horror.

She couldn't help but picture him in her mind. Images of all the horrible wounds filled her thoughts and she found herself imagining the things Glory had done to him. What had caused the round hole in his chest that ran so deep? How many times had he been hit to make his eye shut that tight? How much had it hurt when something cut that long line in his chest that started at his dislodged shoulder? Why did his wrists have oval-shaped bruises lacerated in his pale skin? Was that glass that had been in the cuts on his face?

For a moment, Buffy almost turned around. She almost went back to the bleach blond that lay in the crypt. She wanted to go back to fix him. But she couldn't. She could never love him, though he certainly proved that he was capable of loving her. But she couldn't love him back. What would her friends think if she did? How could she explain that he was more than convenient muscle that protected her little sister due to his sick obsession for her?

She now knew that his feelings to her were not a sick obsession. No, it was something closer to love that he must be feeling. There was no other way. Why else would he have let himself be beaten beyond mercy? Why would he tell her that he did it to protect her emotions when he didn't even know she would find out? What he'd done was selfless and real. It was out of love. She couldn't deny it anymore, no matter what.

And she didn't want to deny it. If fact, she accepted it with that same feeling that was more than happiness. Spike, one of the strongest people she's ever known, loves her so completely that he protects her family. Though she would never say it, Spike was hers. He was more than a pet He could even be called a friend now, though it wouldn't ever be anything more. Right now, that wasn't possible. At least, not until Glory was dealt with.

Glory. Oh, how Buffy wanted to kill her. In fact, she wanted to do nothing more. Well, maybe other than kiss Spike again. No. No, that couldn't happen again. Buffy ignored these thoughts and put a picture of the hell goddess in her mind. Glory in her skanky little outfit, in her whorish high heels, strutting around with her frizzy hair, hurting Spike.

Buffy froze. Even when she didn't want to think about him, she thought about him. The image of him, broken and battered with Glory standing over him filled her mind again, and it pushed her to go back to him. So she did.

Buffy turned on her heel and went back to Spike's crypt without a second thought. She had no plan or any idea what she was going to do. All she knew was that she needed to be there for him. She almost kicked open the door when she stopped and thought about it. Things were different between her and Spike, so she would be different, too. Gently, she opened the door and went back in.

He was still lying there, looking like death. This time, now thinking of him as a friend, she felt the horror of what had happened to him settle in. His black eyes were both closed, but he didn't look asleep because he wasn't breathing. He looked dead, and that bothered her.

She went to his side and gently put her hand on his shoulder closer to his neck where she could see he wasn't totally injured there. She didn't want to cause him any more pain than he was already in. "Spike," she called for him quietly.

Slowly, his one better eye opened to fix its blue gaze on her. "Buffy," he hoarsely whispered. Everything hurt. It even hurt for him to talk, which was one of his favorite things to do. He was surprised to see that Buffy had come back, and it showed on his face. Buffy's conscious nagged at her for it.

"Spike I just wanted to say thank you. I'm really bad at dealing with emotional stuff, so I'm just going to cut down to it and help you out, okay?" She read the surprise on his face, but didn't wait for an answer. Slowly, she slipped a hand under the curve of his neck. "C'mon, we're going to get you cleaned up and in bed."

Using her support, Spike struggled to a sitting position. He was embarrassed when a muffled groan escaped him, so he bit his bloody lip to keep quite. Buffy saw this and got a little closer. "Spike, you're hurt. Don't pretend you're not, okay? It'll just take more energy if you put on you tough guy act. Just be… just be you."

Spike cocked his head in confusion. She wanted him to be himself? But by being himself, his real self, poncy William sometimes came through. Though Spike knew William, Buffy didn't. What if she hated him, too?

But, as he always would, he did what she asked. He ignored his vampire pride to be independent and leaned on her as she helped him stand up. He used her as a cane of sort, letting her take the place of his weak leg.

"Messed up knee?"

He nodded weakly.

Buffy paused, as if she didn't know if she really wanted the answers to her next questions. "What happened to it?"

Spike tried to shrug, but it cost him. He winced in result. "M'not for sure," he started, "It may have happened when I got knocked into the wall. That or when I… fell down the elevator shaft."

Buffy froze. "You fell down an elevator?"

He chuckled dryly. "Yeah. Screwed up my bloody shoulder and the damn thing had already been dislocated when…" Should he say? Should he talk to her about this?

"Spike, you can tell me, you know. You can talk about what happened, if you want, that is." Buffy would be there for him, she resolved. He had supported her, and now she would do the same. She would do what he needed.

He sighed again, but decided she should know. Maybe it would help her, somehow. "…When I got out of the chains."

She kept walking, but her blood ran cold. Again, she wished only to kill Glory. "Chains?"

"Well, yeah. You didn't expect her to let me run about, did you? Got strung up like a punching bag, right proper. Had to get the bint to hit me hard enough to break the bloody things."

Buffy almost shivered at the image forming of her mind, Spike chained and helpless. She focused getting him to the trap door, though the progress was going slowly. "How'd you get her to hit you? Use your Spikely charms?"

He snorted, though it hurt his ribs. "As if. Had to insult her, I did."

Buffy turned her eyes to his face in awe. "What'd you say?"

"Mmm. Told her she was the god of bad home perms and that you were going to kick her skanky lopsided ass back to whatever place would take a cheap, whorish fashion victim like her."

Buffy laughed, a real laugh for the first time in forever. "I have to say, that's one of your better insults."

"Thanks. Had a few hours to work on it."

A pang hit her heart. She needed to lighten the moment. "Spike?"

"Hmm?"

"That sounds like the dumbest escape plan ever."

He tried to smirk, but the split lip wouldn't allow it. "Hey, it worked, dinnit? Got to the elevator and everything."

"Please," Buffy said while opening the door, "her minions were right there! If we hadn't shown up…" She couldn't finish the thought. The idea that Glory could've gotten him again was too much.

It scared him too. Just thinking about it made his sore muscles tighten. He slid into a sitting position, his legs dangling down the trap door. He looked up to her, his one eye conveying how sincere he felt. "Thanks for coming, by the way. I didn't think you would, to be honest."

Buffy hadn't been expecting that. Suddenly, she felt very guilty knowing that she'd only went to get him in the first place to kill him before Glory could get him to talk. Now, she couldn't imagine killing the broken vampire. Before, she used to joke about it and plan for it all the time. Now, she couldn't.

"I'm sorry I didn't come faster," she found herself saying.

He looked at her in wonder. "Buffy, you came. That's more than I could ask for. I'm fine and I'll live. Don't even worry about me."

Don't worry about him? How could she not when he looked so… what was the word Xander used? Thrashed? Yeah, that word fits the bill. It almost hurt her to look at him. But she was going to fix that.

"Let's get you downstairs, okay? Do you think you can make it?"

For Buffy? He could fly. A little ladder wasn't going to hurt him anymore than he already is. Slowly, he turned around and put his hands around the rungs, thanking heaven that his fingers hadn't been broken. Slowly, painfully, he inched down and down into the second level of the crypt.

His feet hit the ground, but he had to hold on to the ladder to steady himself before attempting to move to the bed. He made it a few steps before falling down. Buffy didn't bother with the ladder and just hopped down the hole. "Spike!" she called desperately, "Are you okay?"

She was at his side, her hands hovering over him, not sure what to do. She'd never tried to be good to him before, and she felt awkward to start now.

He groaned softly, trying to sit up and succeeding with her help. He coughed, a painful sound, struggling to get into a less painful position. "Honestly, luv, can't say I am. Hell bint did a number, that's for sure. Not as bad as Angelus, but-" He stopped, realizing what he'd said. He had never in a million years meant to bring up the poofter. He knew it still hurt her when he was brought up. Just another reason Spike hated him.

Buffy's eyes went wide. "A-angel… h-he hurt… well, he…" She didn't want to say it. She didn't want to think her first love had been capable of all the things she knew he'd done, but she didn't know that he'd actually… to his own childe?

Spike looked her in the eyes. He knew what she was trying to ask. "You mean, did he torture me? Yeah, a few times. Said he was toughening me up."

She looked horrified. "Spike, I'm sorry. I didn't know-"

"Why would you be sorry, pet? It happened at least a hundred years before you were even born. You couldn't have done anything."

She helped him off the floor and moved him to the bed. "Still, I just don't see why Angelus would have done that. I mean, aren't you his childe?"

Spike nodded. "Dru sired me, but because she was off her rocker, Peaches had to do the job of training me up as a vampire. He claimed me as his childe and that's the day it all started."

Buffy helped him get his head on the pillow. All the time, she listened to Spike talk about his fledgling days. She was learning more about vampires in this one night than she had over her whole career. "How do vampires claim?"

Slowly, his hand moved to his neck where his long fingers danced over the marble skin there. Buffy watched and saw all the pale half-moon shapes on his neck. Scar layered onto scar were piled up one after the other. She knew from experience how painful a vampire bite is, and she'd only been bitten three times. On Spike, she couldn't even count the overlapping scars.

But he could. He pointed to a dainty scar on the side of his neck just under his jaw. "Dru liked to go here. She kept at the same spot whether it was when she sired me or when she just wanted a taste."

Pale fingers danced over another smaller scar, but this one was an island, all by itself under his ear. There were only two layered scars there. "Darla. Only got me twice. Once when we first met and another time when I went a round with her precious Angelus. First time I tried to stand up for myself. But back then, William still had hopes in them."

Last, a chipped black nail indicated a graveyard of scars placed over his jugular. "Peaches thought it left a more prominent mark when you bite down and tear the flesh a bit. He wasn't wrong. First time he bit me was when I fought him for Dru. Needless to say, he won and took to training me up right that very night. About a week later, I changed my name."

Buffy was fascinated. She knew that Angel and Spike didn't get along, but she never knew it had been that bad. In fact, it sounded like other than once in a while with Drusilla, the whole vampire family had been horrid to Spike.

Her fingers hovered over each one until she met his gaze, silently asking if she could touch. He smiled a little and nodded, wanting to feel the heat of her hand on him. Her fingers traced the patterns that decorated his neck, leaving a hot trail behind on his skin. He almost shivered in pleasure of her touch, but it would've been too painful.

"Did it hurt?" she asked.

"Every time," he rasped.

Her fingers moved from his neck up his jaw to his cheek where cuts were riveted in his face. Her nail hit something imbedded in his skin and she gently pulled on it to reveal sparkling crystal. She held the bloody bit in between two fingers and showed it to him. "Is this glass?"

He nodded. "Was getting a drink and she got impatient."

Rage flooded her. This wasn't right. None of it was right. Her fingers continued their inspection of his wounds. Nasty cut around his eye, she noted. Her hands went to his chest. She pulled away some shreds of his shirt, exposing the wounds there.

"Oh, Spike…" Something along with his ribs punctured his lungs. Her fingers traced the bruised skin around the whole in his chest. She hated to asked, but, "Poker?"

"Finger," he corrected her.

"Damn," she cursed quietly. Her fingers continued to trace the long gash starting at his shoulder that ran to the middle of his chest. It was deep and painful looking.

She had to fix him. "Do you have anything to fix you up with? First aid kit? Bandages? Warm water?"

Wide, innocent looking blue eyes met hers. "You really don't have to do that. I'm fine, Buffy."

"You will be. Like I said, do you have anything?"

His hand moved to the edge of the bed, finger pointing down. "Under there, there's a first aid kit. Never use it, so it'll be full."

She bent down and pulled it out, setting it on the bed next to him. She flipped the lid to the container and rummaged through its contents. She studied the objects and pulled out what she needed. Bandages, wipes, tape were set in a pile next to the vampire on the bed. "We're going to get you cleaned up," she said, trying to sound like she had a grip on the situation, though she really felt like crawling away and hiding.

"I can really do it myself, Buffy. You don't have to do this." He really couldn't, but he also didn't want her to be uncomfortable around him. Also, he didn't want to be embarrassed and weak in front of her.

She grew frustrated, letting her own inner turmoil snap out at him. "Why, Spike? Why don't you want me to help you?"

Shyly, embarrassed, "I just… don't want this to be out of pity. I want it to be because you care. And we all know that-"

"I do care about you, Spike."

He was stunned into silence, his good eye staring at her in wonder. Suddenly, she felt guilty again. Sure, she hadn't hated Spike for a while now. She didn't like him, and until he started watching her family for her had she moved to thinking of him as an ally. Now, after what he'd done, she knew he was at least her friend, whether she wanted him as one or not. Right now, she did want him as a friend. Maybe even more…

No. Bad Buffy. He's a vampire. She vowed to never get with another vampire after Angelus. It had just been too much trouble than it was worth. But Angel had never done something like Spike had done for her today… and he had no soul.

"I know I've never said it… and that I've even been pretty bad to you, though you… you love me, but I do care. Not like you do, but I care about you. You… you're my friend, Spike. You really are. I see that now. And I take care of my friends."

He was shocked. The slayer, the woman he loved, had just told Spike that she cared about him, even if it was only as a friend. If she could be honest, so could he. "Buffy, that means more to me than anything. It makes it all worth it. Everything that happened today, well it was already worth it because you and Dawn are safe another day. But this? Hearing you say that you care is just the cherry on top, pet."

That about broke her heart. He'd almost died for her sister, expecting nothing from her, and just because she said she cared about him, it made it all worth it to him? She broke away from his intense gaze conveyed through one eye and busied her hands with sliding them under his back. "Let's get you fixed," she said as she got him sat up.

He nodded, the gesture costing him in energy that he was running low on. Slowly, his fingers searched for the bottom of his shirt to remove it. He began to lift it, putting hell on his ribs and arms. The whole time, Buffy just watched his trembling hands, entranced by the horrid oval-shaped bruises encircling his pale wrists. Without a word or thought, her hand went out and took his, wanting to offer him comfort. Her fingers traced the ugly patterns delicately.

"Spike, I'm so sorry… I can't say it enough…"

He squeezed her hand back, enjoying her comfort. "It's okay, luv. I'm gonna live."

"It's not okay, Spike. None of what happened to you today was okay."

His lips pulled in a grim smile. "I'll be fine, pet. It's just gonna take some time."

"I'm going to help," Buffy promised, her eyes staring into his. Slowly, almost shy, she grasped what was left of his shirt and tore it away so he didn't have to hurt his ribs any more. As her fingers came into contact with his smooth, cool skin, she couldn't help but feel a growing desire rise in her. So Spike has abs. Very nice abs. So what? She ignored her thoughts and continued her work.

With that gone, uglier cuts and bruises were exposed, covering every inch of his body. She couldn't help but think poor baby, and want to apologize again, but she knew that it bothered him when she said sorry, and she certainly wasn't going to refer to Spike as baby. She found herself having to remind herself that she and Spike were only friends.

She laid him back down and pulled an antiseptic wipe from her little pile. She removed it from its case and took the cloth in her fingertips. Slowly, with care as to not hurt him, she pressed it to the bloody areas around his wounds, cleaning him up. She used wipe after wipe, each one containing less and less blood than the last. They littered the floor by the time she had him totally cleaned off.

Now, all she could see were the prominent deep cuts and dark bruises patching over him. She shuddered to herself, thinking of all the nasty things that could've made suck nasty marks on a vampire. It was almost too painful to look at.

Next, she gave him a very serious look. "Spike, the next things I have to do are going to hurt. We need to get your ribs bandaged and we have to get your shoulder back into place. It's not going to be pretty."

He snickered. "I doubt I look pretty right now, anyways."

Buffy almost verbally disagreed. Spike always looked good. Even after having the tar beat out of him by a hell goddess, he managed to look beyond sexy. Buffy allowed herself thoughts like this. After all, she could appreciate someone good looking of the male gender. Nothing wrong with that.

She sat him up, deciding to do the shoulder first. She moved to rest on her knees in front of him, her hand still hold up his good shoulder. She knew it was going to hurt, and that's what bothered her the most. That she would be the one hurting him, even if it was to help him. "Breath," she commanded.

As soon as he took a deep breath, obedient at he was, she slammed an open hand into his bad shoulder. A loud pop told her she got it in. Spike screamed out in pain, but got control of it quickly, still managing to sit up. "Bloody hell," he cursed not so under his breath. Buffy smiled at his familiar phrase. He was going to be okay.

"Now the ribs," she said quietly after she'd given him a moment to rest. He nodded, knowing it had to be done. His body was hurting more that it had in years, but he was determined to grin and bear it.

She took the long bandages and began to wrap them tightly around his waist. She couldn't help but notice how fit he was, all ropy muscles in his back, smooth, hard muscles in his stomach, sharp hipbones. Spike wasn't the biggest guy she knew, but he sure could pack a punch, take a hit, and keep on coming. She knew most of it had to be mental. His thick head just would never let him lose.

She laid him back down and set to work on his face. She peered at the deep gashes on his cheek first. "It looks like all the glass is out… What's it feel like to you?"

"Kinda burns, but I agree. Don't think there's any more glass in there." She nodded and used yet another wipe to clear the blood from his face. She then put a bandage there to give the wound some padding. Buffy couldn't help but notice what fine, sharp cheekbones he had. In fact, she also noticed that Spike had attractive features everywhere that she fixed. With each thing she did for him, she grew more and more attracted to him.

Last was his eye. She couldn't do anything for the swelling, but she decided to take care of that nasty cut that wrapped around it. She taped the wound together and without thinking, she placed a timid kiss on where she'd fixed him. Color rose to her cheeks as she realized what she'd done.

All Spike could do was enjoy it. In fact, he'd enjoyed everything she'd done to take care of him. He knew she didn't love him, but he now knew that she cared. He was trying to think of something to say as Buffy cleared everything away and made to leave.

"Going so soon?" he asked, trying to sound like he didn't care either way, though they both knew he did.

She looked back to the bed where his broken body lay. Could she leave him yet? No, there was something she still had to do. "You need blood. Do you have any here?"

"Mmm, upstairs in the fridge."

"I'll be right back," she promised, climbing the latter up. She got to the top floor and noticed the red trail of blood that led from the bier to the trap door, reminding her of how badly hurt he still was. She tried to ignore the pangs in her heart as she spotted the refrigerator by the TV. She went to it and pulled out a pack of blood for him.

Buffy made her way back down the ladder, but she could feel his eyes on her the whole time. It wasn't an unpleasant feeling, either. She noticed she was beginning to enjoy his attention more and more.

She joined him on the bed and lay next to him as she handed him the pack of blood. He took it and tried to roll over to get his back to her, though it caused him pain. She was confused by the action until she heard soft growling sounds as the bag came to his lips. Gently, she pulled him by his shoulder back to his back. She realized then that he'd been trying to keep her from watching him feed.

It's not the fact that Spike had a problem feeding; he just didn't want to make her watch. He knew she didn't like it, and he didn't want to lose what friendship they had forged that day just because she was reminded of their places in the world. Vampire and slayer.

Her touch, so light and warm, confused him. He turned to her, trying to lick the blood from his lips. Her green eyes looked not at him, but into him. "Spike," she said sweetly, "you don't have to hide anything from me. Not anymore. I accept you for who you are. For all of it."

And she did. She could have a vampire for a friend. Just not as a boyfriend. Never again could that happen. Could it? Lately, she was even starting to question that.

Spike cautiously continued to feed from his bag, drinking all that was left. He licked his lips when he was done, trying to remove the evidence of what he was. Spike always loved being a vampire. That is, until it kept him from being with Buffy.

"I have to get back to Dawn, but I can stay for a while if you want," Buffy offered. To be honest, she didn't really want to go. She would understand if he wanted her to, but she didn't want to end this new, odd connection they had formed.

"Stay, please. Just for a while." He was already sleepy, the blood working it magic. He could already feel his broken bones beginning to mend, slowly as the grinded back into place. The pain dulled as Buffy curled into his side, her body heat warming him. He could smell her vanilla shampoo in the air and it calmed him. Not a bad way to end the day, he thought to himself.

His eyelids were closed as sleep came to take control of his weary body, but her voice kept him awake for a few more moments. He could feel her fingers running through his wild curls in a petting motion. "Spike?"

"Yes, pet?"

"Do you think you would love me if I wasn't the slayer?"

Without hesitation, "Buffy, luv, you are not the slayer. The slayer is part of you. The slayer doesn't have the cute little quirks I love about you. Sure, it's a part of you, so I love it as well, but I honestly love you for being Buffy. Nothing more, nothing less."

Honestly. He'd been using that word a lot, tonight. Guess she brought out the William in him. In fact, William had a question of his own. "Buffy?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you think you could maybe love me if I wasn't a vampire?"

He never heard the answer, though. He was already mostly asleep when he asked it. Still, she gave him an answer when she knew he was completely out. It was an honest one.

"Oh, Spike, I think I already do."

With that, she kissed the top of his head softly to not wake him and went home to Dawn. That night, she dreamed of platinum hair and black leather.


"Thanks for watching her, Spike," Buffy said quietly. For once, she had no problem giving him credit for something. It was like after all that had gone on between them had been ended by his one great act of loyalty to them.

He gave a half smirk, hindered only by the by the split in his lip. "Anything for my girls," he replied almost shyly. Shy was something Spike never was. But he'd been full of surprises lately, so this was small in comparison.

Normally, Buffy would have snapped at him. She would've said that she wasn't his girl, that she never would be and that Dawn wasn't either. But that was before… She didn't even want to think about what had happened. Besides, she couldn't really say how Dawn felt about being claimed by the vampire, and at this point, she was having a hard time saying how she herself felt about the confusing vampire.

So she allowed it. "I know. I mean it, Spike. I really do appreciate it. All of it."

He knew that she wasn't just talking about the babysitting. He knew that she meant everything that had happened over the last few days. He was actually confused by his Slayer's response. He had been expecting to be put down, for her to say something to degrade him. But she hadn't, and that gave him hope.

"S'alright. Not a big deal, pet." He added his special name for her. He was getting braver. Besides, what did he have to lose? "In fact, I enjoy looking after the Bit."

Buffy smiled. "I know you do. Which is good, because I have a feeling you'll get to do it again sometime." In fact, she was even thinking of having his position become permanent. Maybe Spike should move in with them, for the time being. It would give her mind some rest about Dawn, and would give Spike a safer place as well. He had been taken from his crypt, after all.

But something held her back. What would her friends think? She knew the answer to that. They wouldn't approve. Not one bit. Because of that, she didn't ask. Spike would be fine. Wouldn't he?

He didn't look fine, that's for sure. Having bruises and cuts all over your face and chest didn't qualify as fine. The poor man looked like he'd been to hell and back and had only came out by the skin of his fangs. Again, she considered inviting him to stay in her home. She physically had to stop herself, biting her tongue.

"Dawn," she said gently, shaking the sleeping girl's shoulder, "Dawn, it's time to go, honey. Come give Spike a hug goodbye." The slayer in Buffy brought something to her notice. She'd just encouraged her little sister to hug the soulless vampire. The world must be going to hell.

Dawn sat up groggily, yawing and rubbing her eyes. She blinked a few times to wake up. She noticed that she'd been given Spike's duster to use as a blanket. She smiled and stood up and handed it back to him. "Thanks, Spike. I'm glad I got to talk to you. You really made me feel better. I'm still sorry, though."

Buffy frowned. What did Dawn have to be sorry for to Spike? She looked to him for an explanation when she saw all the half healed wounds covering Spike's body.

Oh. She felt guilty about what happened to him. Buffy felt her throat get tighter. Dawn wasn't the only one who felt like that.

"Like I said, it's nothing, Nibblet. Nothing to write home about." Spike smiled fondly at the girl. He wasn't lying at all because to him, it was nothing as long as she's safe. He'd do anything for that girl, same as he'd do for her sister.

Buffy wanted to cry, but she wouldn't let herself. He'd done so much for her, and she hadn't even believed he loved her. But she did now. She knew he loved her. She just couldn't say she loved him back. She couldn't. Not when she had just started to care about him as a friend. She couldn't love a soulless monster. A soulless monster who'd almost sacrificed himself for her sister.

Dawn wrapped her arms around Spike's neck and squeezed very gently as to not hurt him. He hugged her back, not as tightly as usual because he didn't want to injure still mending ribs any more than they already were. Dawn buried her face into his neck, snuggling closer to him. "I love you, Spike. You're my best friend," she whispered in his ear.

Spike smiled, enjoying the moment when he smelled something. Overly-priced skanky perfume. Spike would recognize that smell anywhere. His eyes shot opened and connected with the green of the Slayer's. He pushed Dawn away from him quickly into her arms. "Hide with Dawn," he ordered, his voice deadly serious. "She's coming."

Buffy's wide eyes saw the fear and determination in the blue eyes that looked back at her. But it wasn't fear for himself. It was fear for her and Dawn.

"Spike, come with us," she pleaded.

He shook his head. "She's almost here! I'll buy you some time. Now go!"

Conflicted, Buffy did as he asked. She took a wide-eyed Dawn by the hand and pulled her to a crevice in the cave wall. She pulled her inside, hiding them in the dark shadows. Dawn was squirming the whole way, trying to go back. "Buffy, let me go! We have to get Spike!"

Buffy pressed her finger to her lips to signal to her sister to be quiet. She held her sister to her as she whispered in her ear. "We can help Spike by staying hidden. He'll do better if he doesn't have to worry about us. Understand?"

Dawn nodded, though she still didn't like it. She adjusted herself to be able to see what was going on just as a figure entered the main area of the cave.

"Oh, vampire!" Glory sang as she strutted in. Her high heels clicked on the stone of the cave floor.

Spike's blood boiled. He knew that he would see Glory again, but his body still froze in fear at the sight of her. Last time he'd seen her, she'd spent the day torturing him. That wasn't exactly something that he could get over in a few days. Still, he didn't let anything running through his head show. Angelus had done worse to him way back when he was all soulless, so he wasn't going to let a trumped up goddess with bad hair stop him.

"Hell-whore. It's been a whole forty-eight hours. Think I learned who the key was so soon?"

Glory's red little mouth pouted. "Oh, Precious," she smirked when Spike flinched at her name for him, "I'm not actually here for my key. No, I'll worry about that a little latter. In fact, I came to see you."

Buffy's mouth ran dry and her heart skipped a beat. This can't be good. Dawn shrank back against her and she wrapped her arms around her small frame.

Spike stood as bit taller. "What do you want from me? In case you were wondering, I'm not your biggest fan."

She bit her lip in a seductive way and he inwardly cringed. "You see, Precious, after our time spent together, I couldn't stop thinking of you. I've never felt this way before of such an inferior creature, but think I understand. I've grown attached to you. You're the only male that didn't do what I wanted and survived. It was… refreshing. I have decided to keep you."

Spike chuckled bitterly. "Right. You've gone 'round the bend."

Glory frowned and placed her hands on her hips. "I most certainly have not! I'm attracted to you, Precious. Deal with it, 'cause you're coming home with me."

"Like hell," Spike growled. He wasn't going anywhere with this nut. "Like soddin' hell."

She grinned. "I had a feeling you weren't going to want to come. Boys!"

At her call, Glory's scabby little minions came into the cave, rope in hand. Spike vamped out. He wasn't going without a fight. His inner voice kept nagging at him, though. You couldn't take them last time, it said. There's too many. He ignored it and snarled at them fiercely as they began to circle him, his fangs gleaming in the dim light.

They came at him and he was ready. He tore at them with the ferocity of a terrified animal, snapping his teeth at their limbs and tearing at their flesh with incisors. He did everything he could to fight them off, but it wasn't enough. They aimed at his weak points where he was already injured. Blows rained mostly on his busted ribs and the yellow eyes of the demon.

It became too much, and they overcame him. His hands were roughly forced behind his back where they were bound with the coarse rope. He tried to struggle from their grip, which earned him another blow to the ribs that sent him to his knees. He was winded, and the pain had reverted him back to his human features. The whole time, in his mind, he prayed that Buffy would keep Dawn safe.

He gasped for breath as Glory's minions supported his weight. When he regained enough strength, he lifted his head and glared at the hell goddess. He spat at her polished toes.

"Don't worry, Precious. I'm going to teach you some manners. And I'll break you of your bad habits." She clicked her tongue, signaling to her minions that it was time to go. Spike could barely stand by now, so they proceeded to drag him out, following their master. He deliberately avoided looking in the direction of the crevice in the wall where his girls were hidden.

Dawn had been trying to get to him as soon as he was jumped by Glory's minions. Buffy had to hold her in place and keep her hand over her sister's mouth to muffle her desperate cries for the vampire. Buffy knew Spike had been able to hear it, too because of his superior hearing. She just hopped it hadn't distracted him.

She came close to calling for him herself. She would've gone out to help him if Dawn hadn't been there. It had been one of the hardest things she'd done in her life to sit by and watch as he was taken from her.

Everything had bothered her. Since when did Glory become interested in her Spike? Spike. Just Spike. She hadn't planned on claiming ownership of him. No one could own Spike. He's too wild, too free to be owned. Not even Glory could have him.

Buffy would make sure of that.


Spike felt a rag doll. It annoyed him beyond belief that he was unable to fight back. He wanted to scream out in indignation, but he didn't want Glory to get anything from him. He remained silent as the creepy hobbit things tossed him in the back of what he could only describe as a pedo-van.

He was pretty sure his shoulder knocked out of place when he hit the inside. You could probably guess so by the sickening popping sound it had made. It sure hurt enough to be dislocated.

He was left alone in the back for the time being. For a moment, he just laid there in exhaustion. He'd given up on breathing already. His ribs hurt too much to move at all.

He twisted his head around, trying to see his environment. There appeared to be nothing else in the back of the van with him. Summoning his strength and running on pure will, Spike got to his knees and moved closer to a wall. He pulled the right side of his body as far away from the wall as he could and then slammed his hurt shoulder into it as hard as he could.

A strangled groan passed his clinched teeth upon impact. The echo rang inside the mettle room, ringing in his ears. It wouldn't have hurt so much if it hadn't been already healing from the last time he got to play with Glory. He rolled it around in his socket, trying to get it to heal faster.

He noticed a barred window on the double doors of the van. He wriggled his way over there and put his black eye up to it to see out. It was dark, still being night, but that didn't challenge the vision of a vampire. Spike could clearly see that they had left the graveyard and were heading into down town Sunnydale where all the factories were. This was nowhere near where Glory's last home base had been, and this worried him. Buffy wasn't going to know where to find him.

If she's coming in the first place.

Spike shook those thoughts away. She knew he'd never tell about Dawn. He'd proven his worth to her, hadn't he? She wouldn't leave him to Glory. He just knew it. She cared. They were friends, now.

Knowing that she wouldn't leave him was the only thing keeping him from attempting to dust himself right there. He couldn't imagine having only Glory for company forever. It just wasn't an option.

He felt his strength to stay up leaving him, so he fell back, slumped in the corner. As he began to work on the rope binding his hands, he prayed Buffy would get there soon, because he didn't know how much left of him she would find if she took too long.


Buffy let Dawn go from the crevice. She was now screaming and crying for her missing vampire. "I hate you!" she screamed at her older sister. "I hate you and I don't know why Spike loves you! You don't care about him!"

Rage at the accusation fueled Buffy. "I don't know why he loves me, either! I don't even love myself! And I know I've been awful to him, but don't ever say I don't care! I care a lot! I lo-o-ike Spike. I like him. He's my friend, and I'm going to get him back."

Dawn heard the raw determination in her sister's voice. Buffy really did care about Spike. Dawn fell into Buffy's arms. "Buffy, I'm so scared! You saw how bad he looked the last time she got him. What if she-"

"Dawn, don't think about it. She's not going to do anything. Here's what we're going to do. We're going to go back to the house and we're going to have Willow do a spell to find him. Then I'm going to go get him. Okay?"

Dawn sniffled and wiped her nose on her sleeve. "Okay, Buffy. Let's go now."

Buffy took her little sister's hand and pulled her back through the cave to where Spike had a trap door that lead to his crypt. She didn't want to go the way Glory had gone. She was confused when Dawn stopped over where Spike had been taken. She was staring at something intently that made her start crying again. Buffy went over to see what was wrong. "Dawn? What is it?"

It was his duster laying on the ground. Buffy's heart clinched at the sight of it. Gingerly, she bent down and picked it up. She then draped the coat around Dawn's thin shoulders. "He'd want you to take care of it for him until he can came get it himself," Buffy told her quietly.

Dawn nodded. "I'm ready to go."

The two girls went deeper into the cave until they found the trap door. When they climbed up into his bedroom, Buffy couldn't help but feel like the place was deader than normal. Spike always made things seem so real, and now he's gone and it just isn't the same.

They went up further on the ladder to the top level where they could leave out the crypt's front door. When Buffy got to the top part, her blood ran cold when she saw the bier. Not because she disliked being in Spike's home, but because of the image that flashed in her mind of his broken and battered body laying out on it. She froze on the spot and gave it a funny look, remembering her kiss with him, the ghost of a tingle burned just like she was kissing him again.

"Buffy, what's wrong?" Dawn's gaze fell on the tomb that Buffy wouldn't look away from. What was the big deal? It's not like it's anything new. But then she noticed something new about it. Something rusty red covered the stone in drops and pools. Dawn knew that it was blood.

"Buffy, who's is that?"

"Spikes," the blond replied quietly. Tears threatened to pool in her eyes, but she refused to them fall. She had to be strong Buffy for Dawn and for Spike.

"C'mon, let's go," Dawn said quietly, pulling Buffy's hand. Buffy snapped back to reality.

Buffy peeked out the door of the crypt to make sure no one was around. Just as she opened it, she could see the taillights of a van pulling into the night. Something in her knew that he was in there. That was Spike.

She wanted only to run after him and to tear that van apart and to tear apart Glory's minions until she found him. Spike was hers, and no one else was going to have him. She would make sure of it.

For now, she had to think of Dawn's safety. She couldn't leave her alone and unprotected. She squeezed the younger girl's hand tightly when the coast was clear, signaling for her to keep up.

Buffy took off at a run. Dawn stayed right on her tail the whole way, though she was having a harder time than her sister. They practically flew to their house, fear for their vampire fueling them with adrenaline. Buffy got to the door first and she threw it opened.

"Buffy? Dawn? Is that you?" Xander asked from the living room. Willow was sitting in the recliner while Xander occupied the couch.

The two girls went in, both looking a mess. Xander was worried instantly. "Are you guys okay?"

Dawn shook her head, dark hair flying. Her tears were falling again. "Glory came and-"

Xander went and hugged the little girl. "Are you okay? Did she hurt you?"

"No, I'm okay. But she took Spike!"

"Again? At least we know he won't spill, this time."

"That's all you're worried about?" the fifteen year old asked. "She's going to hurt him, Xander!"

"Dawn, it doesn't matter. He's a monster. If he didn't have a chip, he'd-"

"He'd still take care of me! He loves me and Buffy, Xander! He's my best friend."

"He can't love. He's a vampire. A soulless-"

"A soulless vampire that got very hurt protecting my little sister," Buffy interjected. "I'm not leaving him there for it to happen again."

Xander looked to Willow in confusion. "Is that the robot?"

Willow shook her head. "I haven't fixed it yet. That's the real thing."

Xander looked back to a very pissed off Buffy. She knew that her friends didn't like Spike, but did they actually think that she would leave him there for Glory to… to… she didn't even want to think about it.

"Willow, I need your help," she asked the red head.

Willow smiled at her friend. "What do you need, Buffy? Locator spell?"

"If you're not too worn out from today."

The witch nodded. "I can do it. I'll go get my stuff." She ran up the stairs to her room to get her supplies to do the spell Buffy needed. Willow didn't say anything, but she had a suspicion that Buffy cared more about the vampire than she was letting on. She also felt like it was because of her and Xander that she wasn't saying anything about it, which made her feel bad about herself.

Those remaining in the living room were in a heated situation. Dawn was mad at Xander for even suggesting that they leave Spike to be killed by Glory. Her mind wouldn't even wrap around the idea of being without her best friend.

Xander was confused that both Dawn and Buffy seemed to care about the soulless, evil vampire. He knew Dawn had grown attached, but Buffy was on her team now? When did that happen? Just the other day, she had been all for staking him. What had changed her mind?

Buffy was trying to stay as calm as possible. She had multiple problems going on at once. Xander was being bigoted. That was a minor one. Dawn was freaking out about Spike. That was a bigger one. Spike had been taken by an insane hell goddess intent on owning him. That one took the cake, and frankly, pissed her off.

If Spike was anyone's, he was hers. Not because she forced it, but because he had given himself to her out of love. Buffy just hopped that she could get him back in time to tell him that she care for him, too, because she was going to tell him she loved him as soon as she got him back.


Spike blinked when the harsh light blinded his eyes. The back door to the van opened up, and inside came Glory's minions. "Let's go, vampire," one barked harshly. He hopped into the back of the van and grabbed Spike's arm. He was joined by another of his kind who took hold of Spike's other arm.

Spike had rested and regained some of his strength, though his ribs and shoulder were still throbbing painfully. His inner fire had risen and his spirits were high. Nothing was going to break him.

He shook the minions off and growled at them, his eyes flashing yellow. His vampire ridges had grown and the visage of the demon had taken over. "Get your grubby little hands off me," he snapped.

"Then come with us," the braver of the two minions said, though you could still head a tremor in his voice.

Spike knew he was going to end up going where Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum wanted, whether he wanted to go or not. He decided he was going to give them hell as much as he could.

"Make me," he challenged. And they did. More minions came to help the original two in order to move Spike. The whole time, he attempted to stay in the van, but there was just too many.

He was pulled out, barely staying on his feet. Slowly, inch by inch, they moved him out of an indoor garage that they were parked and into a factory. A factory that Spike knew well. It was the same one he and Drusilla had taken over when he killed the Annoying One.

It had been fixed up into a rather nice place. The walls had been painted gold in the main area. Paintings and such had been hung on the walls to add a little color. It had been turned into Glory's homestead, and a posh one at that.

Spike hated it.

His yellow eyes flashed to everything, glaring at anything he could see. Finally, when they went through one last door, he spotted Glory herself. The strawberry blond beamed at him. "Well, hello, Precious! Glad to see you've joined us. How do you like your new home?"

"I think it's still funny that you think I'm gonna stay here, hellwhore."

"Baby, the question is, how are you going to get away?"

Spike took a snap at her face, his fangs coming inches from her nose. If her little flunkies hadn't been holding onto him for dear life, he would've gotten her. "Name's Spike, not baby."

Her right connected with his face. He swished the blood around his mouth before spitting at her shoes. He looked up to glare at her. "So I take it this is gonna be an abusive relationship, eh?"

"It doesn't have to be if you'll behave, Precious."

"See, that's where we're going to have a problem. I never behave. Ask my poof of a sire."

Glory giggled. "I don't think I'll ever meet your sire, baby. I'll talk to you later. Boys, take my little pet to his room. I'll visit later." The golem-like creatures pulled him back away from the crazy woman. To the right was a metal door that had not a single decoration on it. Spike was led to it, all the while thinking that this door was bad news.

He wasn't wrong.


Willow said the final words of the incantation and a light burned into the map of Sunnydale. Buffy's heart lept, knowing the light indicated Spike. It burned in the factory area of the town. Willow's eye's narrowed. "Isn't that the factory that Spike and Drusilla took over when they first came here?"

Buffy nodded. "Yup. I'm going."

"I'm coming with you," both the Key and the witch said in perfect harmony.

"No, you're not," Buffy shut them down.

"Why not?" Dawn asked. "Spike means just as much to me, if not more than to you. And Willow has every right to go, too."

"I agree to both matters," Buffy said, "but I need you to stay safe and I need someone strong enough to watch over you. Willow is powerful and I trust her to keep you safe."

Willow brought up her own point. "Buffy, you're going to need help. She's too strong for either you, me, or Spike to take on alone. You need some muscle."

"Well, my muscle's been taken, hasn't he?" The Slayer didn't mean to be snappy, but she was getting worried about Spike. Why did he have to get taken just when she realized she could admit to herself how she felt about him?

Dawn raised an eyebrow. "He's not the only vampire you know, though."

Buffy didn't like where this was going. "Explain."

"What if we called in Angel?"

Without realizing it, Buffy recoiled at the name. "He wouldn't come, sweetie. He and Spike hate each other for good reason. I don't think he'd be willing to help out."

"But isn't Spike his childe?"

"Yes, but you didn't see the bites," Buffy told her sister quietly. She received puzzled looks from both the other girls.

"What bites?" the red head asked.

Buffy knew it wasn't her place to say, but she wanted to build some sympathy for Spike. "Angelus used to bite him in some dominance thing for vampires. Some left some nasty scars."

Dawn's gaze became murderous, feeling just like her sister had when she found out. "I'll kill him. If he hurt him-"

"He hasn't done it recently," Buffy interjected. "It happened before he had a soul."

Dawn calmed a tad, but only a little. "Well, as mad as that makes me at Angel, we need some extra help. If he won't do it for Spike, we all know he'll do anything for you. Just tell him what's going on and that you need him. Play him if you have to."

"Dawn, I can't just play Angel like that when I don't even like him like that anymore. I like Spi-Spi-spinach. Yeah, all that spinach."

"Buffy shut up," Willow teased. "Dawn and I both know you like Spike more than you're letting on. Xander and Giles stay blissfully unaware. Us, we both know that you're starting to fall for Spike."

Buffy's eyes got wide in surprise. Her mouth opened and closed like a fish gasping for air. "Wh-what? Wh-who said that?"

"You do. In your sleep. Every night," Dawn said matter-of-factly. She then mimicked her sister perfectly. "Oh, Spike! Spike, I love you so much! Angel who?"

Both Willow and Dawn busted up laughing while Buffy just sat there and blushed, dumbfounded. When the girls collected themselves, Willow pulled her best friend into a hug. "Buffy, you can't help who you fall for. Look at Tara and me! I wasn't expecting that at all! But I'm happy, and I love her more than anything. It's okay if you're falling for Spike. Besides, he is hot."

Now both Buffy and Dawn gaped at the witch. "What?" she asked, confused. "Just because I like girls doesn't mean I can't appreciate a good looking guy. And Spike is pretty dang good looking."

"Yeah," they all sighed at the same time in a slightly dreamy tone. Buffy was the first to snap out of it.

"But we can't let Angel know, or he might not come to help, okay?" They all agreed and Dawn went and got Buffy the phone. The Slayer took a steadying breath before calling her ex.

It rang once… twice… "Hello, this is Angel."

"Angel? This is Buffy. I need a favor."

"Anything," his deep voice purred from the other end of the line.

"One of my group has been taken by something really strong."

He paused a moment. "And you said I was the vague one. What took who, Buffy? I'll heading out the door. Just fill me in."

The moment of truth… "A hell goddess took Spike." The other side of the line got very quiet. "Angel? You there?"

"A hell goddess took Spike? And this is supposed to be a bad thing?"

Anger surged through her, giving her strength. "Yes, it's bad! It's very of the bad! Spike has become one of the team. He's my friend, Angel. I can't just leave him. Not after last time she got him…"

"So that's what happened," Angel said as if something had just clicked.

"That? What that?" Buffy asked, confused.

"Spike and I have a link. I can tell when he's feeling something extreme. The other day, I felt that he was in pain. I haven't felt him in that much pain for a long time…"

Since you caused it, Buffy thought to herself. She didn't say anything, though. She didn't want to ruin her chance to get his help. "That was probably the other day. Please, Angel. I know you don't like Spike, but I do. He my friend and he matters to me. Will you please do this? If not for him, then do it for me."

Again, the line was quiet. Buffy held her breath, waiting for an answer as precious seconds ticked by. Finally, he spoke. "I'll do it for both of you. I'll be there in an hour."

It was the longest hour Buffy ever waited.


The door to the room opened and Spike was shoved inside. His hands were still bound behind his back, so he was unable to catch himself. He tried to roll and take most of the fall on his side, but it still jarred his already injured body. The door was slammed behind him and he heard it lock.

He managed to sit up and look around the little room. There were bloody weapons and tools on the wall that made his stomach churn. There was a small window in the far wall, but thick bars were welded into it, blocking it off as an option of escape. Other than that and an iron pipe running in the ceiling, the room was bare. Spike listened in around him. He couldn't hear anything other than the shuffling of the demon's robes as they skittered away.

Feeling a bit safer because he was alone, his vampire features receded to his human visage. He groaned as he fought against his busted ribs to sit up. Slowly, he made his way to the wall with the window in order to have something to support his weary frame.

His internal clock told him it was still night, so he wouldn't have to worry about sunlight for a few hours. He wriggled his wrists around, trying to loosen the rope binding them. If he could just get free of that, he could see about how strong those bars on the window were against vampire strength. Injured vampire, but pissed off vampire none the less.

After a few minutes, he knew he was getting nowhere. "Little buggers can tie a knot," he grumbled to himself. He glared around the room in order to be doing something when his gaze landed on the bloody tools on the walls. He sniffed in their direction to discover that the blood was of many different creatures. Humans, vampires, demons, you name it, it was there.

He wanted to get as far from that wall as possible until he saw the blade resting on a hook towards the middle of the wall. Spike couldn't help but picture a little light bulb shining brightly about his platinum head. "Score," he whispered. Slowly, painfully, he stood up and limped over to the knife.

His hands wouldn't reach up enough behind his back to grab it, so he faced the gruesome wall and very carefully took the sharp edge in his teeth. He kept his lips away, but he could still taste the stale human blood crusted onto the blade's surface. His demon's tongue wanted so badly to flick out and take a lick, but Spike controlled himself and refused.

Buffy wouldn't like it.

Instead, he spat it out on the floor and bent down with it behind him. Blindly, his hands searched for it. A sharp cut on his finger let him know that he'd found it. He flinched a little, but didn't say anything. It hadn't hurt that much.

His fingers wrapped 'round the hilt and he angled it up so that the sharp edge cut into the rope connecting his hands. Carefully, he worked at it, sawing away at the rope. He grinned when it fell away and his hands came apart. He stood, his muscles aching. Now, he could move around and work on an escape.

Knife in hand, he went for the door first just to check. It was very solid and very locked. He then went for the window. He gripped the bars and yanked as hard as he could to see if they would give. They didn't, but he could tell that two were weaker than the others. If he worked at them a while, they may give.

For what seemed like forever, Spike used the blade to hack at the cement weakly rooting the bars to the wall. He was close enough to freedom that he could taste it. All the while, he continued to think of Buffy. Was she coming? Was she worried about him? Was Dawn okay? The questions plagued his mind, keeping him going even as his rough hands tore open and bled out has he worked.

Finally, his efforts had paid off. He gave one hard tug at the looser bars and they gave way. He felt almost giddy with the idea of getting away from the crazy hell goddess. There was just enough room for him to slide his battered body through the window.

Slowly, he eased his shoulders through the window. It was murder on his ribs and shoulders, but he had to get away. He slid up to his hips out the window, the wind hitting his face. He was only feet away from freedom when he felt sharp nails dig into his legs. His nails dug into the ground like claws as he fought to stay out the window, though something was pulling at his legs. He held on as long as he could, but the force pulling overpowered him.

He got pulled back through the window back into the dark room again. He turned to fight off whoever had kept him from leaving when he saw who it was. Glory stood there, hands placed on her hips. She scowled at him, obviously annoyed by his escape attempt. "Now, Precious," she said deadly low, "Where do you think you're going?"

Before he could come up with something smart to say back, one good punch from Glory sent him to a black world. The last thing he remembered was calling out Buffy's name as the world around him faded away…


Buffy was pacing back and forth in her living room when she got the tingles on the back of her neck. She knew that it was a vampire at the door before the bell even rang. She flew to the door and tossed it open before Angel could even ask to come in. She lost no time on getting started.

"Angel, you're finally here! Okay, we need to get going. Willow is going to stay here and keep Dawn safe while we're out."

"Where's Xander? You guys are still friends, right?" the dark headed vampire asked.

"He went home with his girlfriend. He's pulling a you." At this, Angel looked confused, so Buffy explained further. "He's off brooding. If anyone hates Spike the most, it's him."

"I beg to differ," Angel mumbled.

Buffy shot him a glare that he didn't miss. "I know you hate Spike. I saw your work," she said.

"Work? What work?"

"Yours and your vampire family's marks left all over his neck," she replied coldly. Her mind flashed back to when she saw them, again. All the pale white crescents dotting his smooth neck.

Angel's expression darkened. "That was a long time ago. It was Angelus, not me. Buffy, you know I wouldn't-"

"I know you wouldn't, Angel, but Angelus did. Frankly, I don't blame Spike not being your biggest fan."

Angel didn't know what to say. He never thought that Buffy would ever find out about his and Spike's past, or that she would even care for that matter. Now, he was left wondering how much she knew. "What did Spike tell you about… how things were."

"I asked him mostly about everything. He told me that because Drusilla was insane, you had to raise him as a vampire and that your methods were harsh. He didn't go into detail. I'm not sure I would've been able to hear it if he had," she replied. The two walked over to the weapons chest and began to pull out things they could use.

Angel didn't know what to say. He knew that he couldn't defend his actions back then other than saying that it wasn't him, but that would be a lie. Yes, he hadn't had a soul, but even today he still would love to just beat the crap out of Spike every now and then. Spike just had a talent for pissing people off.

But he would also be lying if he said he hated Spike. Yes, he wasn't best of friends with his wayward childe, but he did care. In a way, a sire and childe relationship was like that of a parent and his child. Angel didn't care to be around Spike, but he also didn't want him to be hurt by anyone.

He took out a sword and tested how sharp it was while trying to find words to express how he felt. He decided it was just best to say what was on his mind. "Buffy, I know this may be odd, but it's the only way I can explain this. You know how vampires are dark creatures that enjoy doing evil things. It's the demon's way of life. Vampires in our line are like family to us. The way a demon shows… well, not affection, but expresses that it actually cares about another vampire in a way is violence. I know it sounds awful, but that's just how it is for vampires. To be honest, Spike is like some weird son thing to me. I don't want him to be in pain."

Buffy didn't know what to say. Somehow, she could understand what he was saying, though it was a harsh fact. The protective part of her and the part that was in love with Spike wanted to say that it didn't matter and that Angel said he cared. She knew that was silly, though and that she should accept his help.

"Look, it's in the past so let's just keep it there, okay?" Buffy said, not wanting to fight with the person who'd come to help her get her vampire back.

Angel nodded and smiled at her. He knew things would never be as they had been between them, but he couldn't help be feel a bit more alive around the slayer. In fact, that reminded him of something. He waited until he was driving his car with her in the passenger side to ask.

"So, Spike finally fell in love with you."

Buffy's heart almost stopped. She never told him. How had he known? "Uhh, yeah, that's what he says."

"He's not lying," Angel said. "Spike is a lot of things. Rude, mean, annoying, strong. Liar, that's something he never was. If he says it, he means it."

"That still doesn't tell me how you knew," Buffy said. "And how you feel about it."

Angel shrugged. He'd tried doing his best for Buffy, but she had the right to live her own life and make her own choices. She wasn't a teen anymore. "Like I said, Spike and I have that link. If he feels something powerful enough, such as love for you, I can feel it unless he hides it. He didn't bother. I think it was a bit of a challenge to me, actually."

"And how do you fell about it?" Buffy asked, wanting reassurance but knowing that she probably wasn't going to get it.

Angel kept his eyes on the road, but he continued to talk to her. "Spike isn't my first pick for you, but he's not my last. He has a few redeeming qualities." She could tell he was having a hard time saying something good about Spike, but he kept on. "He's strong and brave, so he's a good match for you. Whatever he loves, he'll protect until he dies. He's very loyal, and he won't betray those who he cares about. For those reasons, he actually makes a good pair for you."

Buffy smiled, knowing that Angel was okay with her dating Spike. The blond vampire was all that was on her mind. That is until Angel asked a serious question.

"Do you love him?"

Buffy decided to do what she was trying with Spike. To be honest. "Yes, I do. I think I do, at least. It's been a long time since I loved someone. Didn't work out too good last time."

"Just do me a favor, okay? If you don't love him, don't lead him on. The idiot falls in love hard. He's had his heart broken enough. I've never felt him in love as strong as he is now. He wasn't even this crazy over Dru. In fact, he loves you so much, it's-"

Angel cut off as his back arched against the seat in pain. He cried out, but held the wheel steady. Buffy was terrified. "Angel? Are you okay?"

"It's not me. It's Spike. He's hurt bad, Buffy."

The blond girl felt tears threatening to pool over again, but for what seemed like the millionth time that day, she forced them away.

She was so going to kill Glory.


"Oh, would you stop the screaming? It's getting a little old," Glory commented as she replaced the whip on the wall. "I mean, just because you're attractive doesn't mean I want to hear those annoying whines."

Spike was in agony. He'd woken chained to the pipe that ran along the ceiling in the room as he had been before in Glory's hotel. His arms strained under his full weight, but he ignored that. What really had his attention were the angry slash marks the whip had left on his back. It hadn't been a new experience for him, and he knew that his wounds would scar and fade just like the old ones into faint pink lines marking their way across the surface of his back.

Glory hadn't given him a break since he woke up. She'd told him that he was bad for trying to leave her when all men covet the sacred Glorificus. He should be grateful to be in his position.

"I don't like punishing you, Precious. Well, okay, maybe a little, but it didn't have to be like this. If you hadn't tried to leave me, this all could be a little more pleasurable on your part. But now, I have to leave a lasting impression of why you shouldn't try to leave me."

Glory paced around him, her eyes roaming him freely. Suddenly, she got an idea. She walked over to the window where Spike had dropped the blade he had used in his escape attempt. She picked it up then strutted back over to him and found a piece of unmarred skin on his shoulder blade. "I guess I'm just going to have to leave and impression," she whispered mincingly in his ear.

Before he could even think about what she was going to do, she drove the tip of the blade deep into his skin. Slowly, in order to make the pattern last, she carved the letter G into his flesh. She rolled her eyes impatiently when he screamed out in pain again.

She'd had had enough of that, so she ripped off what was left of his tattered shirt. She tore a long strip of the black cloth and faced him. Spike glared at her, but at this point, he was to broken to say something insulting to her. All he could do was wait for Buffy, because he knew she was coming. He knew it

"I really want you to shut up, baby. That is, unless you want to say you love me."

That pushed him overboard. No way would he ever say he loved anyone other than Buffy. "I've said it before, sod off," he snarled.

Glory slapped him, her nails scratching across his face, leaving long grooves dug into his flesh. He hissed in pain, but it was worth it to get one last jab in at hell whore. She grabbed his chin and forced his jaw open so she could shove the cloth in. Then she wrapped the ends around the back of his head where she tied it in place. Gagged, Spike glared at her in silence.

Next, Glory did something he hadn't seen coming. Beatings, whips, knives, his pride could take. What she did next cause him so much indignation that he protested around the gag in his mouth.

Glory rooted her fingers in his messy curls, yanking his face up to meet hers. She pressed her red lips to his in a crushing kiss. Spike fought to pull his head away, but she wouldn't allow him to move. She pulled away and grinned at him. "Such a nasty mouth tastes so good…"

Suddenly, her eyes lit up in an evil way as she got an idea. "I wonder," she said hauntingly, her lips next his ear as she continued to hold his head up by his hair, "what it feels like to be a vampire and to be bitten."

Without warning, she pulled his head to the side, exposing his neck to her. She latched on to it, her white teeth digging into his soft skin. She bit down hard, using her blunt teeth to pierce his flesh.

His eyes rolled back into his skull in pain. Glory had bitten him in the exact same spot Drusilla used to, bringing back memories of the last hundred and twenty-seven years. He couldn't pull away and he couldn't fight her off. All he could do was groan against the fabric in his mouth.

Glory pulled away and shrugged, his blood staining her mouth. "Not as fun as I thought it would be, but still entertaining. Now, let's really do something that'll piss you off."

She went to the wall and looked over her tools before grinning darkly and choosing one. She turned to face the vampire who was eyeing her warily. She was happy. He was hers to do whatever she wanted with him. And, oh, the things she wanted to do after she taught him his lesson. She pulled the cross brandished in her hand out from behind her, displaying it for her vampire. He showed no fear, which bothered her, but she didn't let it show.

She had a goal. She was going to give him something today that would last him for the rest of his existence if it killed him.


Buffy rubbed her tired eyes. She was beyond worried now that Angel had told her that Spike was in pain. Her mind couldn't help but imagine what was happening to him. All she wanted to do was find him, get him home, and tell him that she loved him.

She watched the road fly by as Angel gassed on. She knew they were going as fast as possible, but each second that she was away from Spike was more time for something bad to happen to him.

Angel was just as worried for his childe. As he drove, Buffy had told him about how powerful this Glory was and the damage she'd done to Spike already. "Her finger? She used her finger?"

Buffy nodded. "It left a nasty sized hole, too. I think it punctured his lung. That, or a rib."

"Sounds like this could be really bad."

"Angel? You would know if… if he was dust, wouldn't you?"

"He's not dust, Buffy. The link is still there. Painfully there, but there."

Buffy's eyes fell upon the factory as they pulled up to the entrance. She immediately jumped out of the car and started for the door. Angel grabbed her wrist and stopped her. She looked back into his dark eyes, confused. Was he backing out?

"Buffy, I just want to warn you. What we find in there isn't going to be pretty. He's alive, but he's messed up."

Buffy's expression turned stony. "I know that, but I'm not going to just leave him."

"Alright, then. Let's go," Angel said, leading the way into the abandoned factory. They brandished the weapons, both wanting to do some damage to Glory. They walked the halls, noting that the place had been cleaned up. They came to the main room when Buffy stopped.

"Any idea where Spike is?"

Angel shook his head. "He's in the general area, but the link doesn't give me specifics. Unless…"

"Unless?" Buffy asked puzzled.

"If we focus very hard, we can speak to each other mentally," Angel explained. "I'm going to try it."

Buffy nodded in wonder, amazed by the ways of vampires.

Angel was worried. He hadn't tried to mentally communicate with Spike for years. Another problem was that if he was unconscious, Spike wouldn't be able to answer. Angel focused all his energy on finding where he and his childe were connected in his mind. When he found that, he tried to talk to him.

Spike? Where are you?

It took a moment, but a small, raspy voice replied. Peaches…

Where are you, Spike? Buffy and I are here. We're trying to find you.

I'm… with hell bint. There's a door. It's metal. Don't… don't think I can keep this up, Angel. Too tired… Tell Buffy… tell…Buffy…Slayer…Uhng!

The connection was broken as Spike's consciousness faded, but not before a wretched scream cut through the quiet of the factory. The very sound shook Buffy to her core. "Angel, what the hell was that?" she asked, her voice full of fear.

"Spike told me where he was just before he blacked out. We're looking for a metal door."

"Angel, tell me that wasn't Spike," Buffy begged. To think something had been able to make him scream like that, to make that inhuman noise rip from his throat…

Angel didn't answer because he knew she already knew the answer. He was spared an awkward silence because at that moment, Glory's minions appeared from all directions. Angel and Buffy took defensive stances, ready fight. Buffy wanted to unleash all her anger on Glory, but her little pet things would work as a warm up.

It was hardly a fight. Within minutes, all of the creatures lay in puddles of their own blood. All but one. Angel held him off the ground by his throat as his demon features came to surface. The minion attempted to escape, but Angel's grip was too tight. "Please, vampire, don't kill me," it begged. "I was only doing as I was told."

"Where is Spike?" Angel asked. The demon looked confused for a moment until Angel's grip got impossibly tighter.

"You mean the other vampire. He-he's here. He's with the magnificent Glorificus."

Buffy joined them and stared the creature down. "Uh-huh. Wanna get a bit more specific?" the slayer growled.

"Oh, Slayer! Y-Y-Yes, there's a room down the hall. They're in there. Just please, don't kill me!"

Angel looked to Buffy. The vampire slayer gave an evil grin and nodded at him. Angel smirked. "Sorry," he told the quivering demon in his grasp. "I'm just doing as I was told." He closed his fist and broke the demon's neck. He let go and the body fell to the floor.

Buffy didn't wait another second. She stomped down the hall until she found the door. Angel was right on her heels. She was beyond pissed, something that she'd never been before when fighting Glory. She kicked the door and it flung open.

What she saw stunned her. Spike's wrists were chained to a pipe running through the room high enough that all his weight was supported by it. Blood was everywhere. It flowed down his arms where the chains had cut into his skin, down his chest along all the cuts, down the side of his face from above his eye, running into the horrid gag he was forced to wear… it was everywhere. Buffy couldn't even take in all the damage that had been inflicted on him. It made her stomach churn.

What really boiled her blood was the fact that Glory was still pressing a cross into his shoulder. Buffy could smell his flesh burning and she saw it smoke. Glory grinned at her, her lips literally blood red. Blood was smeared around her lips. His blood.

The hell goddess smiled at the slayer and vampire as they entered. She pressed the cross down a bit harder, even though she knew her vampire had passed out from the pain already. He was a tough one, she'd give him that. She tossed the cross to the side and wrapped her arms around her vampire's blood covered neck in a mock hug. Her fingers played with the curls at the nape of his neck. She regarded the slayer coolly.

"What can I say?" she asked. "He was a bad boy. Doesn't do a thing you tell him."

Angel growled at seeing the terrible state his childe was in, a low, throaty sound. Glory eyed him carefully. "And who are you?"

"I'm his sire," Angel ground out, nodding at Spike's broken form.

Glory's lips formed an O. "He didn't speak very highly of you. Well, actually he just said you didn't like him very much. Guess he was wrong."

"Let him go," Buffy hissed.

"Why should I?" To prove her point, she turned him a little, exposing his back where her initial was carved into his skin. She dug the tip of her nail into it and he unconsciously flinched in pain. "He's mine."

Something in Buffy broke free. It felt like a dam had broken inside her, letting out all her rage and passion out. She went up to Glory and punched her in the nose, knocking her away from Spike. "I'll kill you," she swore to the hell goddess.

"And how are you going to do that?"

Angel appeared behind her and wrapped his arm around her slender neck, his fangs showing as his vampire ridges came out. "I'm going to help."

While Angel held her in place, pure rage at Spike's treatment giving him extra strength, Buffy wailed on her face, punching her repeatedly until Glory transformed to into a guy. Buffy instantly recognized him as Ben. Buffy only stopped and stared.

"B-Buffy," Ben said quietly. "What did she do?" The nurse looked around and saw Spike hanging by his bloody wrists. "Oh, gosh. Why did she do this? I mean, this time it was just a vampire, but what if it was someone else?"

Red filled her vision. Just a vampire? "He's not just a vampire, Ben. I love him."

There. She'd said it to someone out in the open. And it wasn't as hard to do as she thought. Now she had to deal with Ben. "You knew about this?"

He nodded slowly, his chin hitting Angel's arm which was still around his neck. The vampire hadn't let up any even after seeing the change. "Glory and I share a body. I can't control what she does."

Buffy knew then that in order get rid of Glory, to keep Dawn safe, to get revenge for Spike and Tara, was to end Ben's life. Determined, she went to the wall that held all the bloody instruments and took down a knife. Before she could return to Ben and kill him, she turned around to see Angel whispering in his ear.

"I haven't killed a human in a long time, but this shouldn't count since you're half hell goddess. Little lesson in life; no one hurts my childe but me." Angel latched his fangs on to Ben's throat and ripped it out in a vengeful, primal way. Though it was heavy on his soul, it was worth it for Spike.

Buffy didn't waste a second. She flew to Spike's side before Ben's body hit the ground. She yanked at the chains wrapped around his wrists, but they didn't budge. "Angel, please help me!" she called desperately. He was by her side in a heartbeat.

"Hold him so he doesn't fall," the vampire directed. He curled his fingers around the chains as Buffy wrapped her arms around Spike. She tried to be careful of him, but he was just so cut up everywhere that she knew just touching him was going to be painful for him.

Angel yanked as hard as he could, breaking the chains. Spike's body came crashing down into Buffy's arms. She couldn't stop herself at this point. She sank to her knees, still clinging to him and cried. Her tears poured chaotically as she held him, cradling his head in her arms. "Spike, I'm so sorry," she cried, her tears falling on his face. They washed away clean lines in the patches of blood.

Angel didn't touch her, not wanting to set her off. He crouched on the balls of his feet and watched the slayer cry over her vampire. In all his years, he'd never seen anyone as sad looking as Buffy did at that moment. Only when her sobs quieted into silent tears did he reach out to touch his childe.

Angel examined how badly injured Spike was as Buffy just held him and watched. He could see that Spike was going to scar from some of his wounds, but most of them would heal with time. Gently, his fingers traced the outline of the cross that had been burned into his childe' s shoulder. He could tell that it was going to be there permanently. "Damn," he cursed, not believing that even a vampire could take so much abuse.

"Buffy, we need to get him out of here. Let's get him home."

Buffy was about to agree and start to get moving when Spike let out a low groan. His eyelids began to flicker open as he regained some form of consciousness. Buffy and Angel watched in shock as he fought to be awake, listening to him mumble. She gently pulled the gag from his mouth so they could hear what he was saying.

"Names…not baby… sod… off… whore…"

Buffy smiled at the familiar words, but she was still trembling in fear for him. "Spike? Spike, it's me. It's your Buffy." She took his hand and held it, trying to let him know she was there.

"Buffy's not…mine…doesn't want…me…."

It physically hurt her to know that was how he saw her. "Yes, I do, Spike! I'm so sorry! I came as soon as I could. I… love you… I want you!"

Hearing this, hearing her say she loved him make him wake up faster than anything. His blue eyes focused in on her face. She looked so angelic. She was his savior. He smiled shakily and reached up with his other hand to cup the side of her face. "Buffy? You came?"

"Yes, I came, you… you… silly vampire! I wouldn't ever leave you. I love you, Spike."

Spike grinned weakly. "Can I tell Peaches?" he asked as the black was threatening to swallow him up again.

"He already knows," Angel said, smiling. If Spike was okay enough to make cracks about him still, he was going to survive.

Spike turned his head just a little to see Angel, but you could tell that even the smallest motion caused him pain. "What are you doing here, Peaches?" Spike was honestly confused. Why would his estranged sire show up to come save him from a hell goddess? He'd think hearing news like that would thrill Angel.

"I heard you needed some help," Angel replied simply. He wasn't going to be all lovey-dovey like Buffy, but he also wasn't going to be cold. He'd been horrible to Spike in the past. Seeing him this hurt reminded him of the days as Angelus when Spike would've looked like this because of him. He was determined from this point on to try and fix his relationship with his childe.

Spike was trying to come up with something snappy to annoy Angel when he felt himself losing consciousness. Instead, he looked to the most important person in his life. "Buffy, I love you," he mumbled before he lost all his strength to stay awake.

Buffy petted his hair in affection. "I love you too, Spike. I'll never let you go."

"Let's take him home," Angel said. He helped the slayer get Spike to his feet, though they carried all his weight. They flanked him on both sides, his arms wrapping over their shoulders. They made quick work of getting out of the building and they were almost to the car.

They stopped at the door out only because of the early rays of sunlight peeking out over the treetops. "You're going to have to drive while he and I stay in the back. I'll put him on the floorboard and keep him from lighting up," Angel said. Buffy nodded and prepared for the dash to the car. She wasn't ever going to lose Spike again.

They ran to the car and the two vampires got in before they started to burn.

Buffy hopped in the driver's seat and started the car. She looked back in the mirror to check on the vampires back there. Spike lay down in the bottom of the car looking somewhat dead. It bothered Buffy to see him so still. Spike was always moving, breathing, talking with his hands. Angel had draped him own coat over his face and used his sleeve to guard his own.

Satisfied that they were okay, she gave the car some gas and sped the whole way home.


As Spike woke up, he wished he was dead. Well, deader. The last thing he could remember was Glory bringing out that cross and… He shuddered at the memory. He didn't want to move to let her know he was awake so the pain could start all over again.

Something caught his attention. This place… it didn't smell like blood and expensive perfume. It smelled like the slayer's vanilla shampoo. Spike really didn't want to open his eyes now. It he was hurt badly enough that he was hallucinating, that's a problem. Still, something in him told him to open his eyes, so he did.

The first thing he saw was the top of Buffy's head resting on his shoulder and it all came back to him. She'd came and saved him. His Buffy had gotten him out of there. And if he remembered right, Peaches had been there, too. And then Spike remembered what she had said.

She had said she loved him.

Was it true? Could it be? He didn't want to get his hopes too high, but he distinctly remembered her saying that she loved him. Maybe she hadn't meant it, though. Maybe it had just slipped out in the moment. But here she was, asleep on his shoulder and everything.

He turned his head to see the room and instantly regretted it. Every fiber of his body ached. It hurt most on his back and arms, but his chest felt like a bloody mess, too. He noticed that his hands were free and that his fingers were curled around something. Steeling himself, he moved to see what it was when his heart melted.

Dawn laid on the bed next him, laying away from him purposefully to not hut him. Her little fingers were clinging to his hand for dear life, like if she let go, he would disappear.

His face lit up in a genuine smile, though it aggravated a cut above his eye. He had his girls and he wasn't ever going to give them up. He'd even fight Glory for his little key if he had to. He'd do anything for either of them.

Suddenly, Dawn woke up. She blinked away the sleep in her eyes. It took her a moment to focus, but when she did, she saw that Spike was awake and watching her. She almost hugged him when she remembered how banged up he was. Instead, she whispered to him as to not wake her sister up.

"Spike, you're awake."

"Seems I am, Nibblet. And all patched up, I see," he commented lightly, referring to the fact that all of his wounds had all been bandaged up.

Dawn nodded brightly. "I helped, but it was mostly Buffy and Angel that took care of you. I just brought in the stuff they used. They didn't want me to see…. I was so scared when they brought you home. I… I didn't know if you were gonna make it…"

Uh-oh. He needed to make his girl feel better. "C'mere, Bit," he called to her, pulling her closer to him. She gave him a worried look, but he nodded that it was okay and she very carefully moved to curl up next to him. He looked her in her big brown eyes and gave her a kiss on her forehead, careful not to stir Buffy. "I'm not going anywhere. I don't plan on ever leaving you again. I'll kill hell bint myself, if I have to."

Dawn gave him a funny look. "You don't know?"

Spike was confused. "Don't know, what, Bit?"

"Glory's dead. She turned into her human side and Angel killed her."

Spike was stunned. Glory was dead? And he didn't even get to do it? And it was Peaches of all people that did? "Bloody hell," he cursed. "Really? Peaches, I mean, Angel off'ed her?"

Dawn nodded. "Mhmm. They didn't tell much in detail, but they said they went to a factory, found you and Glory, Angel got pissed at her for hurting you and they took you home. That's all that they said about it. Oh, and Buffy told me that she loves you. Both me and Willow know. Xander wouldn't stick around to hear it."

Spike laughed, full of joy, but it turned into a raspy cough. Dawn squeezed his hand, worried for her friend. When he settled, she asked if he was okay.

"Got a few new scars, but I'll heal up. Long as I'm not dust, I'll heal up."

"Can I see? I mean, your battle wounds and all?"

Battle wounds. Oh, he liked the sound of that. "I don't mind. Big sis might care, but I'll show you after she gets up, hmm?"

Dawn beamed and curled up closer to her vampire brother. "I was really scared, Spike. I didn't know if we were gonna get you back this time. This time, it wasn't even my fault that you got taken, but I still felt like it was."

"Listen to me, Dawn. It wasn't your fault the first time. Don't for a second think any of this was your fault. You've done nothing but make me feel better, so you don't have a thing to feel guilty for." What was it about this little girl that turned him into a poofter? Speaking of poofs, where was the great sire? "Dawn, where's Peaches?"

"Why do you care? I thought you guys didn't like each other. After all he did-"

"After all he did? Dawn, what did Buffy tell you?" He really hoped Buffy hadn't told her anything that bad. Though Angel wasn't his favorite person by far, he didn't see any point on making Dawn dislike him for something that happened so long ago.

"She said that he took place as your sire and taught you how to be a vampire. She said he bit you a few times, too. That's it. Why?"

He felt relieved. "Nothing. That's it, Bit." He watched her as she looked at him intently. "What?" he asked.

Her fingers trailed over the large bandage on his shoulder. "What was that?"

That? That was an impression of a cross burned into his skin. That's it. "It's nothing."

"Not true. Tell me."

"I don't know what it looks like, right now, but it was the outline of a cross." He was going to be honest with her, but he wasn't going to be graphic about it. Dawn had had enough trauma to last her a life time. Still, she had the right to know. She was too damaged to ever been a normal teenager. She was mature beyond her years because she had to be, so she had the right to be treated so.

"Oh my gosh, did it hurt?"

He nodded.

"Bad?"

"Yeah."

She buried her face into his side and he felt her little body tremble. He freed his hand from her grasp and smoothed out her hair. "Hey, now. No crying here. There's nothing to cry about."

"Yes there is," she contradicted, looking up at him, tears streaming down her face. "You got hurt, Spike. I'm so sorry."

He used his thumb and wiped away her tears. "No, there's not. Yeah, 'm a little banged up, but I'll be fine. S'not like 'm dying. 'M already dead." Dawn laughed a little, but it was still shaky. "Dawn, I'm gonna be fine. It's over, right? I'll never leave you again as long as I exist. M'kay?"

"Kay," she agreed. "Do you need anything? Blood? Buffy went and got you some, but we had to pry her off you first."

Spike grinned hearing that. "Prying was involved, was it?"

"Yeah, she was all clingy. It was cute."

"I'm sure it was. Anyway, about the blood…"

Dawn giggled. "I'll go get you some." She got up and went out the room, glancing behind her once as if making sure he was still there. When she left, Spike turned his head to look at his shoulder. "You can stop fakin' now, slayer. You've been breathing faster for a while now. How much did you hear?"

She lifted her head to see him, her eyes full of tears. "Since you and her were talking about us coming to get you."

Spike was getting flustered. He wasn't good with tears, and both of his girls seemed to by crying over him today. "What is it with you Summers women and the waterworks? There isn't anything to cry about, luv."

"I thought I was going to lose you today, Spike. When we found you, I'd never felt so helpless. I can't lose you, Spike. You mean too much to me."

Spike's hopes were up, but he needed to know. He put her arm around his waist and pulled her closer to him. "Buffy, I'm not going anywhere. I'm yours, if you want me. Now, maybe I'm crazy, but I remember you saying something before when you found me. I don't know if I dreamed it or if you said it and didn't mean it… but I need to know. Did you… do you-"

She kissed him to get him to shut up. It was gentle, trying to be careful of his wounds, but effective. After he got over the surprise, he kissed back, not caring how bruised his mouth was. All he wanted was her.

She finally had to pull away to breath. "Yes, Spike. I love you. And I'm never letting you go."

He grinned. "I like the sound of that. Does Peaches know that, too?"

She nodded. "I told him how I felt."

"Bet he loved that."

"He's okay with us. In fact, he even said he supports us being together."

A scarred eyebrow quirked. "Really? Was does that surprise me?"

Buffy didn't say anything back. Her hand came up and brushed across his face, her fingers trailing where Glory's nails had sliced his face open. He closed his eyes and enjoyed her touching him. Her voice brought him back to real life. "Poor baby. I'm so sorry." She then realized that she called him baby, which was something that he'd said he didn't want to be called. "Sorry. I forgot you don't want to be called that."

"No, you can call be baby. You're not a psycho who vamp-napped me in order to have the most bollixed up relationship that there is. You, my love, may call me baby."

Buffy smiled sweetly. It made Spike's heart want to beat.

"You know I'll never hurt you, right?"

"Unless I want you to, right?" he teased. Sure, it may be weird, but he was a vampire. What can you expect?

She laughed. "Yeah, but I won't try to hurt you. Ever. I love you, Spike."

Just then, Dawn came in and skipped over to the bed. "Warm cup of blood for the vampire. Oh, and your coat is in my room." Spike tried to sit up, but he couldn't. His back ached and the strength of his arms failed him.

Buffy slipped her hand under his back and helped him up. She was reminded of the night when they'd first gotten him back from Glory when she'd first taken him. She helped him rest against the head board while Dawn handed him his cup. He took it with a nod of thanks and vamped out before drinking it. He was so starved, he hadn't been able to control the change.

When he realized what he had done, he turned back and look to Dawn and Buffy, ashamed. That is, until Buffy reminded him. She took his hand and said, "Didn't I tell you that you don't have to hide who you are? I said I love you and I mean it. All of you."

Nothing she could have said would've made him feel better than that. Dawn just stood there, not sure what to do with herself. Spike smiled boyishly at her and patted the bed beside him. She grinned back and curled up next him. Spike felt content only when he had an arm wrapped around each of his girls. "This is the unlife," he sighed.

Spike, I need to talk. Can I come in?

"And now it's not," he growled. Buffy and Dawn both looked confused. He sighed. "Come in, Peaches."

Angel opened the door and came in. He ignored the pang to his heart when he saw Buffy holding onto Spike. "What's up?" the blond vampire asked his sire.

"I just wanted to say that I'm sorry."

Spike pulled a blank. "You're sorry? For what? Being annoying or coming to get me from a hell whore? Really, Angel. What are you sorry 'bout?"

"About… what happened between us. You know… about a hundred and twenty-seven years ago."

Spike knew. He knew what Angel was talking about. His days as Angelus. Spike understood. And surprisingly, he forgave. "It's over, Angel. That was a long time ago. I have to admit, you've changed into a nancy, but you changed. There's nothing to forgive."

Angel smiled. "I have to go back to L.A. tonight. If any of you need anything, just call." Angel turned and left, knowing Buffy was in good hands.

Take care of her, William.

He didn't think he would get a response, but he did.

Always, Liam. Thank you, you poof. Angel grinned. Spike was going to be just fine. He'd raised him to be tough.

Buffy set Spike's mug on the end table. "Okay, let's check you out." Spike leaned back and let her take a peek at all his bandages. Buffy looked expectantly at her little sister. "Dawn, you might not-"

"Buffy, I care about him, too. Besides, he said I could see." Buffy looked to Spike for conformation. He just shrugged and regretted it when his shoulders screamed out in protest. She sighed. "Okay, but it's bad," Buffy warned Dawn.

One by one, she pulled away the bandages to revel how bad it really was. "Oh, my gosh," Dawn said when she saw his back. The angry lines had faded as his healing kicked in, but they were still inflamed red and very visible. Buffy hadn't noticed before, but she saw other faint white lines crisscrossing over his back. It looked like they'd been there for years.

Luckily, the G that had been carved into him was all but gone. She didn't think it wouldn't even leave a scar. Still, she kissed it very gently. He shivered in pleasure, but she thought she hurt him. "Sorry, baby."

"No, it's fine," he assured. Finally, they readied everything and peeled away the cloth over the cross burn. Dawn's hand flew to her mouth in horror.

Spike looked at it calmly. "Ow. Well, that's gonna leave a mark."

Buffy ran her fingers over the imprint gently, remembering the screams that had been cause by that wound. That sound would haunt her memory for a long time. "Oh, Spike," Buffy whispered, pained by how much he'd suffered. She patched it back up and pulled him in for a hug. Her hand played in his hair, ruffling up the mess of curls.

Dawn got over her shock and watched her sister play with her best friend. "You look so different without your hair slicked back," she commented.

Buffy smiled. "I like it. You look cute."

Spike began to purr, enjoying pure happiness. "Well, then, say goodbye to the curls. If I'm hooking up with the slayer, I have to do everything else possible to keep up my image. The hair stays."

Buffy pouted. "Okay, but as long as you leave it like this sometimes."

Spike grinned, remembering something. "Fine, but just for you. Oh, and by the way, look at that lip. Gonna get it… Gonna get it…" Eager, Buffy kissed him and allowed him to get it.

Dawn couldn't take the love. "Oh-kay! I'm gonna leave you love birds alone." She fled for the door, happy that her vampire was back and where he belonged.

Spike let his girl breath. But he had a question. "You know, I never got that ring back."

Buffy grinned slyly as she pulled at the long chain around her neck out from her shirt. Around it was Spike's silver skull ring. "I wear it every once and a while when I get annoyed at you or you confuse me. It reminds of that day and about how happy I was. You make me happy, Spike. And a lot of other things, but happy is the big one."

Spike raised an eyebrow. "What am I making you right now?"

Butterflies in her tummy. She kissed him, but not too hard. "Let's save that for when you don't have broken ribs, okay? We have time."

Spike liked the sound of that. "Yeah," he agreed. "I'm not getting any older. And I'm certainly not going anywhere."

They went back to the kissing.