Okey-dokey, this was a request from Acuarius-Ravenclaw Paot. He/She requested a romantic/comic reunion between Near and Linda after the Kira case. I kind of had to rack my brain for a few days before I could really start it. I don't really find it too funny but I did try to put some humor into it. I hope I didn't disapoint you, Acuarius-Ravenclaw Paot!
Also, if you've never had 'the talk', some kind of health class explaination, or anything of the sort, you won't understand the ending that well. Which is why this chapter is rated T!

Rodger watched Near leave the investigation building again through the security cameras. For the last year and a half he had been randomly getting up and leaving, not bothering to tell anyone where he was going. He wouldn't tell Rodger where he was going whenever he confronted the younger boy either. It was childish.

True, Near was an adult now, but he was also the new L; they couldn't afford for him to go missing or get killed while he was out. At the very least he should tell someone where he was going!

It had first started a few months after C-Kira had appeared. There was a gas leak in the investigation building. They had to evacuate the building for two days while the leak was fixed. Near first disappeared while Rodger had been yelling at one of the workers. He didn't reappear until they were allowed back inside. After scolding the white-haired young man, he'd demanded his whereabouts for the last two days. The response given to him was a cold stare and being told to get back to work; after all, they had a case to complete and had lost too much precious time.

Two months later the case was solved. After reporting his evidence to the client, Near just got up, knowing Rodger would be watching him through the security cameras, and left, only to return a few hours later. Three weeks later he did it again. Three months later the process repeated. It kept going and going until his last leaving.

Since Near would not tell him where he was going, Rodger had called one of the boy's former agents - that hotshot formally known as Gevanni - and had him follow Near and plant a hidden camera and wire there. (Of course he had to pay Loud triple his salary to do it.) Rodger was a little worried Near knew he was going to be spying, especially since his last disappearance was just two days ago. But what could he do if Near knew? Nothing. So he pushed the thought aside.

Rodger waited twenty minutes (the time Loud had said it took Near to arrive at his destination) before accessing the computer linked to the camera and wire.

The screen showed a living room. It wasn't anything luxorious nor shabby. Sitting on the couch sketching a picture was a blonde young woman. She looked oddly familiar... There was a knock on the door. She set the sketch book down on the coffe table and got up to answer the door.

"Hi, Near," she greeted.

"Hello, Linda." Near walked into view of the camera.

Linda! That was right. The artist girl that had grown up in Wammy's House and was now a successful artist. The only one who actually tried to get Near to partcipate in physical activity. He was leaving at random to meet her?

"I wasn't expectanting to see you again so soon," she commented. "Do you want something to drink?"

For the next forty-five minutes they sat on her couch, chatting and drinking coffee (or in Near's case, saying something every so often and playing with an action figure he'd brought with him). Rodger was never aware that the two had ever really been friends as children so he didn't expect them to meet now. Why were they meeting now? Then again, he doubted he would ever get an answer.

Either way, if this was where Near went everytime he left then there was no problem. It was unlikely he would go missing or be murdered there and Rodger knew exactly where he was. Case closed. Now he just had to convince Loud to remove the camera and wire -

"Near, do you remember when the last we had sex was?" Linda suddenly asked.

What! Rodger didn't need to know their relation was on that level. Time to turn off the camera and wire -

"Yes. Two months ago. Why?" he said, glancing up from his action figure.

"You know what a period is?"

"I may look like a child but that doesn't mean I don't know what that is."

"Okay," she blushed. "Well, I've missed my last two periods."

He looked up at her now. "... So?"

She faced-palmed. "I bought a pregnacy test the other day. Guess what the result was."

"..." He just stared at her blankly.

"I'm pregnant."

Thump! That was the sound of Rodger fainting and falling out of his chair.

In Linda's living room Near and Linda waited a few minutes before Near stood up and removed the hidden camera and wire. He'd seen Gevanni follow him to Linda's and had bribed him the same amount Rodger was paying (and threatened to him to strip him of his current job) to tell him what was going on. Near had figured the old man would try to pull something sooner or later, but spying on him this way wasn't his first thought.

When the gas leak had forced them to evacuate the investigation buiding Linda had been out taking a walk. She happened to be walking in their direction when she spotted Near stacking legos on the sidewalk and Rodger yelling at someone. The old man failed to notice her presence as she spoke with Near. She invited him to stay with her while they were fixing the leak. She figured that he had told Rodger at some point and didn't worry about whether the former caretaker knew or not.

"I would think he's learned his lesson. He does dislike the thought of children," Near commented.

Linda laughed. "Yeah. I wonder if he fainted?"

He shrugged. "Maybe. Good idea pretending to be pregnant, by the way."

"Yeah. About that - " Linda was suddenly hugging him from behind and waving a used pregnacy test in front of his face. "I wasn't kidding."

She felt him tense up, frozen in shock. She giggled at his reaction and kissed his cheek.

Bleh, it's better than my first try but I really don't think I did too well on the humor part. Oh, and I know some people would argue Linda is a brunette, but since her hair isn't shaded in in her manga appearence and we don't know for sure the one girl in the relight is Linda, I just go with the idea that she's blonde.