31. Hunt

At first when Edward ran I kind of just hung behind him, my feet barely skimming the ground. The speed at he ran kept me almost aloft, like I was a kite and he was trying to get me into the air. It felt amazing. The wind was warm against my face and body. I was acutely aware of the feeling of my hair and clothing against my sensitive skin, and especially of Edward's hand on mine. The barrage of feelings coupled with the disorientating compulsive focusing of my eye and deafening hearing meant I could barely focus on anything for more than a second, including trying to get my legs to work.

Suddenly Edward stopped, and I was whipped forwards, my body's momentum still wanting to push me ahead. If it weren't for the vice like grip I had on Edward's hand I would've sailed into one of the trees in front of us.

"Bella," Edward laughed, "that is not how you run."

"Sorry, I'm just a little… overwhelmed."

"You'll get used to it soon, I promise." He let go of my hand and smiled a little sheepishly. "Maybe we should learn at your pace then. Just run Bella, like you normally would."

So I did, and for a few moments it seemed like I was running normally, just as I would when I was human. My eyes, and my brain, could keep up with the movement of my muscles and my speed so it seemed completely normal. I knew I had to be going fast though, because the leaves that were falling fell slower, and Edward was by my side running too.

Pretty soon it started to feel completely different, but not in a bad way. Before when I ran, and actually ran not jogged, I would get tired quickly. That feeling never came. And before when I ran my strides were a metre at the most. Now I seemed to be leaping ten times that in one stride, even longer in the next.

I laughed at the exhilaration of it, and pushed myself higher with each bound. I wanted to feel like I was flying, and it almost felt like I did. My feet were suspended for much longer than they touched the ground.

Not running into trees was simple, but it hindered my wish to leap straight up high with each step. Everything was still crystal clear, almost painfully sharp; the roar of the wind in my ears did not obscure the other sounds of the forest. The wind in my eyes did not cause them to water. My skin was still sensitive to the touch of any branch of hedge I couldn't be bothered to dodge, but at the same time what would've scratched, stung, or bruised me only felt like a pat.

The sweet musky scent of the forest was delicious. I didn't need the air, I wasn't panting from exertion, but I drank it in. I could smell the scents of rot, of leaves, of pine needles, of wood, of animals, and of…

Before I knew what I was doing I was running after that scent. The scent that smelled so delicious it burned my mouth and throat like the change and I swear even my stomach rumbled. I wasn't thinking. My instincts took over.

I sprinted through the trees, towards the sent, and spotted them in the distance. I didn't register them as humans, my mind only thought prey.

I leaped into the trees, into the little clearing of the path they followed. There were two. I leaped onto the nearest one, tackling him to the ground and rolling. He was bigger, but I was stronger, and he put up no fight. Before we even stopped rolling I knew he was unconscious. But I also knew that while he smelled good and the blood pounding through his veins was so appealing, his friend smelt better.

He had been in front. His slow human body had yet to turn around, if he'd even registered at all that I'd been here. I leapt from the body below me to him, hitting him softly on the head before I latched onto him. He was unconscious before he fell into the bracken, and my teeth were at his neck before the impact.

I bit through his neck like it was butter, butter that had been left out in the warmth. His hot blood pooled into my mouth, so delicious I couldn't even describe it. I drank greedily.

"BELLA!" I was so lost in the pleasure of the blood that I barely noticed the yell, and didn't defend myself when a clod hard body flew at me, wrenching me off my prey. I hissed as I was flung to the ground, glaring up at the one who'd interrupted my meal.

"Bella, they're hikers. They're humans!"

The disappointment, outrage, and sadness in his voice flung me back to reality. This was Edward, and he was interrupting me, he was saving me. Those people weren't food; they were people with lives and families.

And it was too late for one.

"Oh my god, no," I whispered. "I…I…"

"I should've watched you, or at the very least scouted out the area before I let you go. This is my fault." He felt guilty. I was the guilty one. I'd either killed a hiker or started to turn him.

"No," I said, pushing him off me. "This isn't your fault, it's mine. All mine." I stood, finally seeing the two pair properly.

One was on the ground covered in soil. He had on jeans and a Lions t-shirt under his grey jacket. He still smelt delicious, but my horror at my actions marred that, as well as the scent of alcohol I'd failed to notice before. Still I stopped breathing. I wasn't going to tempt myself. This was the one I'd tackled first. The wet sound of his heartbeat made my mouth water, but that it was there was comforting. I could hear his breathing, he was only unconscious. I could feel through my gift that that was true, as much as I could feel that he'd hit his head on something, probably a root while we were rolling. He'd have a killer headache when he woke up. I checked his skull carefully through my gift. I was relieved to find no lasting damage, just bruising. He'd be fine.

Using my gift was second nature, instinctual, but I suddenly realized what I'd just done, and what I could do.

"I'm going to fix this," I said fiercely, staring hard at Edward. He was still looking sad, disappointed, guilty and angry. I didn't want him to feel like that. He probably thought I'd killed them both. I almost had. But that wouldn't be on his or my conscience for long, I hoped.

I moved over to the other hiker. I was glad when Edward didn't stop me. He was tense, like he was about to reach forward to stop me. I ignored him though, I had to focus.

I crouched beside the hiker. His clothing was more colourful, bright red spray jacket, yellow "big yellow taxi" t-shirt, khaki pants. He looked the same age as his friend, and judging by the stains in his shirt he probably was just as drunk as his friend. I didn't take much note of it at the time, but I could recall as if I was watching a movie the memory of my first sight of the hikers. They had been moving much slower than me but in the half a second from vision to pounce I could see there was a stumbling to their walks.

They had to have been very, very drunk. If this worked, that'd help a lot.

I put my hand to the hiker's neck. Edward tensed and moved forward, but I had enough strength in my gift to halt him. He didn't advance further. I was glad, because I wouldn't be able to stop him. My vampire consciousness could register more than my human mind could, but it still took a lot of my concentration to heal the hiker.

I isolated the venom first, halting its advance. It hadn't yet reached the man's brain; it had only reached halfway up his cheek and down to his shoulder. Then I made it retreat, extracting the venom cells from the man's veins. The silvery liquid dripped through my fingers in equal parts with the man's burning hot blood. It made the venom pool in my mouth so much that if I were human I might've drowned in it. It made my throat burn as bad as the change, my stomach ache.

But as much as I wanted to drink the liquid under hand, instead I pressed more firmly at the wound, pushing the blood back in and pulling the venom out. It dropped into the pool of blood under him, as I watched giving more of the red liquid a silver sheen, turning it into venom as well.

I searched thoroughly for any venom in his system before working at closing the wound.

All in all the process only took a few seconds, but it felt like a long time to me, struggling against the need to satiate my thirst with every slow, moist heartbeat that seemed to vibrate from my hand through my body. I all but leapt away from the body when I was done, unsure of how far I could trust myself.

"Bella, what did you just do?" Edward wouldn't have had any idea what had just transpired. I was just glad he had trusted me enough to let me do it.

"I healed him," I explained and turned away to look at the unconscious hikers. "Now come on, we have to do something with them. We can't just leave them knocked out here like they've been mugged in the middle of the forest. They're drunk. If we position them so they look like they set up camp and fell to sleep they might put the sore heads to that. I knocked them out quickly. I don't think they would've seen me. They'll have to believe their sore heads are from drinking."

I turned back around, my air supply gone. I didn't think I could breathe in and not attack.

Edward was still standing, looking quite flabbergasted. "What? You healed them? Healed the venom?"

I nodded; I didn't have the air to say any more.

Edward looked at the hikers, and back at me, his eyes flickering to my mouth and nose. "Okay, we'll make it look like they passed out. You need to hunt first though." He held out his hand. "This time, I'll keep more than an eye on you."

I nodded.

This time I kept up. Edward was probably slowing himself down for me, and I kept pace step for step with him. It was easy, a little awkward but easy. I would have enjoyed it if not for the memory of what I'd done.

I'd almost killed two people today, and I'd only been awake as a vampire for less than 30 minutes. I couldn't control myself. What would happen if I smelled another human trail? What would happen when I went back to the house and saw Rosalie and Emmett's baby? Would I attack the child I helped create?

I didn't breathe for a good five minutes after we left the hikers. Or at least it felt like five minutes, my count may be off since my consciousness had sped up. I needed to see a clock, check how long a second was, and how it would feel to me.

Edward stopped suddenly. I immediately held my breath again, worrying we'd come across another human scent.

Instead of changing directions thought Edward released my hand. "There are some deer just over there. Let your instincts take over. You seem to already know what to do." Edward tried to smile, but it turned out more of a grimace. I winced.

"I'm so sorry, Edward, I didn't..."

Edward cut me off. "No, Bella, don't blame yourself. Just hunt. You'll think clearer, trust me, and then we'll talk."

So I did. I crept up slowly to the deer. They were drinking from a river. I could smell them from where I crouched, over the smell of the forest and water. It wasn't that they're scent was much stronger, but that my nose was sensitive enough to pick up the smell, single it out.

I didn't choose the largest one, though the male I picked was large, instead searched for the oldest one. I guess my conscience was already so heavily weighed down that I couldn't bring myself to kill the healthiest, happiest deer.

I ran and pounced on the old deer. The rest of his herd saw me jump, and had just turned when I landed on the old male. It must have been too old to hear or see me properly.

I killed him quickly, snapping his neck midair. I bit into the warmest part of its neck. The blood was thick and hot, and helped to satiate my thirst. It was hugely disappointing compared to the taste of the human blood, like a wilted lettuce salad after seeing a gorgeous eye fillet with sauce and accompaniments. It still did the job, filled my belly, and quenched my thirst (only just) but it left my unsatisfied.

I left the body when it ran dry and ran after the herd, tracking their scent trails. I caught up quickly; no deer could rival me for speed. I took down the next oldest deer I could see. It tasted different from the other, slightly better, crisp lettuce compared to limp ones.

Edward found me after I drained the deer dry. I'd sat beside the dead body, hands covering my face. I was angry at myself for what I'd done, angry that the deer blood still left me thirsty and hungering for blood, even though I felt bloated from blood. I just felt angry and irritated and was ready to throw something... maybe a tree.

"Bella," Edward said gently, approaching me slowly. He crouched down beside me, holding out a hand. I peered through my fingers at him as he tried to pry my hands from my face. Either he wasn't trying or I was stronger, because my arms only moved when I huffed and leaned back, onto the dead deer.

I glared at him, though he wasn't the object of my anger. "I don't care if you say I shouldn't blame myself. It was m fault. No one forced me to hunt those humans." How come book-Bella had such good control or Izzy for that matter? She hadn't touched a human. "I thought I'd have more control, since I was expecting it." Actually, I expected it to be pretty easy. I'd assumed I'd have the control of book Bella. Stupid assumption, you know what they say about assume – it makes an ASS out of U and ME.

"Bella, what you did was remarkable. You stopped yourself, you had an unconscious human with his blood exposed before you and you healed him rather than drank!"

"That's only because you stopped me, and I knew you'd tackle me if I made even the slightest move to bite. And I held my breath."

"Still, that was a remarkable amount of self control for an hour old newborn."

"NO IT WASN'T," I yelled, leaping to my feet. "I already attacked them! I went out of my way to attack them. We're only lucky I didn't snap their necks. Why do you always act like I'm blameless? You never sit me down and tell me I did something wrong. You only have that disappointed look in your eyes and shift the blame, mostly to yourself. Why don't you just man up?"

Edward stood slowly, calmly, when I stopped yelling. That action infuriated me. I guess my emotions must have been haywire, because when he stood using his extra height to loom, crossing his arms and looking much like an exasperated father with a child having a tantrum, well... I slapped him.

That really was a show of my strength. I was so surprised when Edward sailed through the air from the force of my blow that for a moment I was still, staring at my hand. It was dirty and blood smeared; deer and human blood.

Edward rolled across the ground and stopped when he hit a tree. The force of his collision shook the branches. He lay on the ground, expression flabbergasted. He brought a hand to his face, and turned his gaze to me. Confusion poured from his eyes.

I rushed to him, crouching over him. "I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me, I'm..."

I was cut off when Edward leapt, wrapping his arms around me and tackling me. I tried to pull myself from his arms, roll him under me, but Edward held tight, maintaining the higher ground easily.

"You want me to blame you? Okay, I'll blame you," he hissed.

I brought my legs up from under him and kicked him away. My instincts overrode the thought that it was Edward. A trapped animal's only thought is of escape.

Edward landed easily in a crouch. I found myself in the same position, ready for flight or to fight.

"It was your fault for attacking the hikers," Edward yelled, and ran at me.

He was very fast. I turned and leapt away, reaching for a tree branch, but his hand caught my leg. He smashed me into the ground.

"You shouldn't have attacked humans," he scolded from above me.

I rolled away before he could trap me again.

"I trusted you too much too quickly," Edward ran at me. "I shouldn't have given you so much freedom." He reached to grab me, restrain me. I tried to fight him off, hitting away his approaching arms. "You're a newborn; I'd forgotten what normal newborns are like. Izzy was an anomaly. You don't have her self-control."

I snarled at him for that, aiming blows at him now rather than just defence. He parried them easily.

"Newborns don't have control, their instinctual, and overly emotional. I'd say unpredictable but you kind of are."

I aimed a blow at his chest, and as he span and dodged he brought his leg out to trip me. His hands seized my shoulders before I hit the ground. His sat on my legs and grabbed my hands before I could pull them away from his grasp. I tried to pull away, but he was unmoving. I slumped beneath him after a few seconds of flailing, aware I'd lost.

"Yes, you're out of control, but that's normal Bella. We were all that way, I killed when I was a newborn, Jasper killed, Emmett killed, Esme killed, even Rosalie killed if it wasn't for blood. You didn't even kill the hikers, Bella. You healed them on top of that. Sure, maybe you aren't as controlled as Carlisle, but don't get so angry and sad at yourself for something so miniscule. They aren't dead, don't mourn them.

"There," he said with a bubble of laughter in his voice as he let go of my hands. "Are you satisfied?"

I don't know why; blame it on crazy emotions, but some way, somewhere through his speech and manhandling of me I started getting attracted by it. "No, I'm not satisfied," I growled.

I flipped over under him, wrapped my legs around his waist and pulled him to me. I kissed him hard, and he kissed back with just as much enthusiasm. Just as much, no restraining himself, no pulling back because I was fragile. I was as strong as him now, and he was very much making the most of that now.

It felt amazing, indescribable, better than the blood I'd just had. All my senses were hyperaware. Edward tasted better than ever, smelled better than ever, felt better than ever. He looked more beautiful with these eyes; his voice was more beautiful with these ears.

I didn't stop myself from taking the next steps, and neither did he.

That's it guys, the next chapter is only half written and I won't post that. Thanks for reading. I may continue, most probably I will not. But you guys can always make your own idea of how this ends. Or I can post a very quick outline of how I wanted it to end. Either Or.

Anyway, thanks guys.