Hello! i wrote this one only today, it took me maybe 3 hours? I started at around 11 and ended at 2 so like... yeah 3 hours... This song really, really got to me and i just had to do a fanfic. I didn't think it would do a good HikaKao, but KuroFai it worked for! So ehre we are! I am working on the next chapter of Oto, I think I'm a chapter ahead of myself actually, and the sequel to Steam. For those of you who want the sequel to Feeding I'm also going to have to work on that... but i have a lot on my hands... So I'll try my best!

Anyway, i was crying when i wrote this, so i hope it really speaks out to all you readers. It's best listening to the song-Heartbeat Slowing Down by All-American Rejects- but you dont have to listen for 3 hours straight like i did hahaha. Enjoy and review if you'd like, this one IS strictly a one-shot, my normal length about 6 pages, enjoy and meet you at the end! and ignore this next paragraph XD

Disclaimer: I do not own the All-American Rejects or Kurogane or Fai or Sakura or Mokona or Yuko or anyone, so don't eat me~~! just read it ;D

I still remember that empty look left on your face

His words. They're the reason Kurogane is sitting in a bar across town now, wondering what he's going to do. He has a money card, but he can't earn anything without the kid, who's back at the café. With the mage.

It's the mage's fault he left. All the emotions he showed to Kurogane, all the love and trust, all fake. All of it. Every last bit, stabbing right through to his heart. His heart, hardened by battle and loss but thawed out by the love of the gorgeous blonde magician, shattered into a million jagged pieces at the total realization. Walking in on the man in tears on his bed they ignored for so long, sobbing and crying into his pillow about how none of them mattered. No one. They meant nothing to him, nothing. Especially Kurogane.

Kurogane had never felt so much pain in his entire life. It threw him into the wall, sword clinking against the doorframe and alerting Fai of his presence. He watched the mage glance over his shoulder and shoot straight up, striking blue eyes rimmed red and enormous.

"No, Kuro, it's not-" he tried to take back what he heard, reaching out and stepping towards the warrior from the edge of the bed, but he recoiled as though he were on fire.

"Then what is it?" he didn't give him a chance to answer, just spun on his heel and booked it out of there, feeling as though his own sword stuck from his chest. Fai's broken expression sticks in his mind now. He had finally brought himself to whisper his name into his ear, prove how much he loved him, and he goes around and does that.

He's not coming back. He's done with this whole thing.

You took the pictures but you left the frames

Fai stares at the ground, numb to everything.

What was he trying to do? It was only a matter of time until one of them heard him, but it had to be Kurogane. Who he really, honestly loves, no matter how much he denies it.

And he broke his heart. Stabbed it. Ripped it apart. And the blood stains him, doesn't let him forget.

All we had written, well, it's been erased

All of their shared nights, laughs, memories, happy little moments, he ruined it all. A deep, hollow feeling goes through his body.

He had finally accepted his love, accepted the fact that he loved them all. He accepted that he loved them as a family; daughter, son, Mokona, and soulmate. The one he was meant to be with, forever. But hearing his name spoken from those kissable lips, those amazingly magical things, he snapped.

How much did they love him? How bad would he hurt them?

He needed to convince himself he felt nothing. But in the end, he felt everything.

Something that I had to do

There is no way Kurogane can go back now. He had to leave. He needs to stay away now, keep the mage at a distance from him. Because he knows, every time he sees his face now, there will be pain. And lots of it.

He pays for his drinks and steps outside into the warm night air. Above him stars twinkle and glisten in a melancholy kind of way, hope and sorrow sparkling in the sky. He lowers his head to the ground and plods down the road towards an open field he knows of, one he used to train the boy in before he got so good that the mage doesn't know about.

It takes him but 10 minutes to reach the great space, laying himself down with his sword beside him and gazing up at the sky.

It's amazing how enormous the great expanse of cobalt blue stretches out, to every corner of their world, shot through with tiny, beautiful pinpricks of wise and innocent light that stare down at him. He lets his mind go blank as he stares up at them, feeling the strength of those little stars course through him as tears streak down his cheeks.

I cut you deep, you're bleeding through

Fai knows he hurt him. He knows he hurt him beyond belief, and he doesn't know how to fix it. He loves him. And he wants him back.

He stands up and takes a step towards the door. It gawks at him and waits for him to step through, but he has no idea where to go or where to find him. His blonde hair falls in his pooling eyes, more sobs wracking his form. He shakes his head and stands still in the room, staring at his hands.

What did he do?

You're every single shade of blue
I'm staring right in front of you

Kurogane stares at the sky. The blue reminds him of his eyes, the little silver lights like his hair and skin, or the light reflecting in them. Those were always his colors, blue and silver. The two most beautiful colors in the world.

His eyes would be the most gorgeous aqua, or cerulean, or baby blue, or ocean deep. He could see love there, deep, deep down inside.

So what did he do to make him say all that? Change his mind?

I can hear your heartbeat slowing down

Fai focuses on his breathing, trying to control the tears that threaten to take him over.

He's done pretending now. This is it. He knows how he feels and he's not going to pretend anymore, to protect himself or not. This is it. This fight was hitsuzen. And now to find his love.

I can hear your heartbeat turn me around

Fai steps through the mouth of his door, leaning out into the empty hall. Kurogane's door is ajar, as though he were inside. Mentally, that's what Fai wishes. But he heard the café door slam, marking the leave of Kurogane. And he doesn't know where he went.

You can take my life

Fai wishes he could teleport, or bring him to him, anything. He wishes his magic worked that way, but it doesn't. He sinks to his knees, drops his forehead to the floor with a thunk.

If he finds his beloved warrior, he wishes that he could just take his anger out on him, transfer all of the pain he just gave him through his sword and into Fai's thin back. Anything to take away the pain he just threw at him.

All you need, make me right
I can't sleep with your heartbeat slowing down

Kurogane closes his eyes tight, squeezing out unwanted tears that settle into his ears. He wants to feel his lover's heartbeat thumping under his arm and his heat pressed into his side. Hurt or not, he still loves him. It took him a bit but he understands the protections he put up for himself not to love or care, but he knows they weren't fake. They were real as the sun. What was fake was his attempts to convince himself he felt nothing. It hurt, but Kurogane understands. He wants Fai back.

Here you left scattered
Like wishes I led to your room

The warrior stands silently and lifts his sword up, tenderly hooking it to his belt as though he were lifting Fai's delicate frame. The first few steps towards home-home with his family, not home in Japan-are hard, but he gains strength as he strides towards their little café, back towards all he wants and needs.

Bury my face in your pillow
Just to smell your perfume

Fai drags himself to Kurogane's room, grazes his stare around his items scattered across the shelves and floor, his clothes on the ground the the sheets on the bed. He picks himself up and lays every last inch of his body across Kurogane's side of the bed, taking in the scent of him hanging in the air. It fills his mind and his eyes sting again.

"What did I do," he gasps.

Outside I'm hungry
But inside I'm just consumed
Tell me how I'm supposed to breathe
Losing you is choking me

He's hollow and empty, pain gnawing away at him in his gut and guilt stabbing him in the heart. Shallow and ragged, his breath comes fast, almost to the point of hyperventilation. He only wants Kurogane. He wants him back, and he wants his pain to disappear. One eye opens in a sudden idea, and he stands again, facing the door.

I can hear your heartbeat slowing down
I can hear your heartbeat turn me around

Kurogane has nothing set in his mind but to take Fai in his arms when he gets back and tell him how everything is okay and he understands and that's it. He can't say anything to hurt him anymore because he knows everything he told him was true and he's just lying to himself, trying to say that his family doesn't matter, even though they so obviously do.

Just like his fake smile, his role as "mother" is just as important, and he couldn't just leave them. Kurogane smiles to himself.

That bastard better watch out.

You can take my life
All you need, make me right
I can't sleep with your heartbeat slowing down

Kurogane swings his arms as he walks, the pulsing of his blood through his veins creating a steady beat he matches his steps to. He's getting to Fai, feeling that heat that always sparks between them flare up when they get back, and showing him how he's never letting him go.

I fucking hate this town
I wanna burn it down
I never felt so cold

Self loathing disgust gnaws at Fai. He couldn't just keep his mouth shut. He couldn't just admit it to himself. He's going to change something, change himself so that he'll never hurt them again. Ever, ever again.

And I when I burn this town
I hope I burn it down
Leave me on my own
I fucking hate this town
I wanna burn it down
I never felt so cold

Fai creeps through the hall and the kitchen into Sakura's room where he knows what he needs will be. Sure enough, lying on the bed beside her is Mokona, sound asleep and snoring slightly. Slender fingers lift the small creature and he takes it back to Kurogane's room, sitting down on the edge of the bed and whispering into its ear.

"Yûko?"

I can hear your heartbeat slowing down

Kurogane is right at the door, using his ninja skills to silently creep in. Pain momentarily clenches his gut but he takes a breath and steps towards their quarters in the hallway to the left, nary a sound coming from him but the softness of his shallow breath.

I can hear your heartbeat slowing down

Yûko'a image appears, gazing out at him in all of her grace and glory. Her darkened red eyes gaze down at him and her black hair is tied up and flowing across her shoulders, drastically contrasting her white skin. Fai gulps slightly as her lips part, speaking to him in the directly indirect manner she has.

"You have a wish," she states. Fai nods, barely.

I can hear your heartbeat turn me around

Her eyes flit momentarily behind him and focus back down at his sullen features, a curve breaking the line of her lips.

"May I give you some advice first?"

Fai nods. Anything from her. After all, she's the one thing that can make it all better, fix everything. Anything she says.

"Turn around."

Fai turns hesitantly, following her directions, and his breath catches in his throat.

"You came back," he chokes.

You can take my life
All you need, make me right

Kurogane holds his arms open and Fai flies into them, burying his head under the other's neck and squeezing him tight. Shaky breaths hit Kurogane's collar and he gently strokes Fai's hair with his darkened fingers, burying his nose on the crown of his head.

"Of course I did, mage," he hesitates a moment, glancing at Yûko. She just grins warmly with an all-knowing curve on her mouth, saying nothing and sitting perfectly still. Kurogane looks down at the top of his partner's shaking head, lowering his voice to barely a breath that tickles Fai's ear. "I love you, Fai."

How can you sleep with your heartbeat slowing down

Fai's breath catches again and his eyes squeeze shut. Those words. Those sweet, sweet words. He chokes on his tears, hiding his face on the other's chest. Kurogane smiles, the beating of the small man's heart reverberating through his arms and warming him through.

I can hear your heartbeat slowing down

"There is only hitsuzen," she murmurs, fading off. Kurogane closes his eyes and squeezes his love, happiest man in the world. As is Fai.

Hello again! Enjoy it? Cry? I gave them a happy ending this time, yay! I hope you listened to the song too or i at least got the story pretty well tied into the song. It was a lot easier then I'm not a Vampire, but just as fun! Any song requests i'll try them, hehe, when i get time. I'm also Betareading for any of you who need it and thing I'd help! But thanks for reading and see you next story ;D

~Jessie Apocalypse