"I snuffed out the Light. Bring on the darkness.
I am comfortable here. It is calm. It is quiet.
My beloved L spent most of his time here and now I understand why.
Here no one can hurt me. I am alone and free.
Here I can be with him once again."
~ Masako Lawliet, Journal entry two days after the death of Light Yagami.

Near was worried about her. It had been eight weeks since Light's death, and she had not been the same. Masako was quiet and withdrawn, barely eating or sleeping. She forced smiles to her face for Hideki and pretended everything was perfectly normal. He would catch her crying sometimes, and she would always tell him nothing was wrong. She had become a habitual liar; possibly because she wanted to believe her lie so desperately.

Tonight he found her standing beside her window with her face in her hands, crying. At first, all he could do was stare as she stood there in the moonlight wearing nothing but his pajama top. He was wearing the bottoms. She had come to him earlier, crawling into bed with him like she did almost every night. After a few passionate kisses and halfway undressing, she ran away – just like she constantly did. Usually he left her alone, but tonight he could not – would not – allow her to run anymore.

"Near," Masako gasped when his arms slid around her waist. She could not stop herself from smiling when he propped his chin on her head. He had experienced a growth spurt at some point without her noticing.

"What are you afraid of?" he asked her, turning her to face him. He decided on taking a different tactic rather than asking what was wrong.

"Nothing," she answered, looking into his eyes that sparkled in the moonlight.

"Liar," he accused, covering her mouth with his as he cradled the back of her head.

Masako moaned when his other hand went to the buttons of the pajama top. Her hands moved across his chest that had broadened and become strong. He was developing into a man before her very eyes, and she was so preoccupied with dealing with her emotional pain she was missing it. She whispered his name when his hand covered her breast and gently massaged it to arouse her again. Her lips sought his and easily found them. She wanted him so much she could feel the excitement literally flowing from her down her thigh.

"Let me have you. I want to make you mine. I love you," he whispered, sliding his hand between her warm, naked thighs. He moaned in her ear when his fingers felt the wetness there. "Please…I know you want me too."

Yes, she did. Masako had continued to put him off because the thoughts of L would enter her mind. Guilt would consume her and she would be overcome with remorse as if she were betraying him.

"He's dead, Masako. Let him go. I'm here. I'm alive, and I love you. Please, love me too," he begged her, holding her so tightly her breasts flattened against his chest.

"Near, I do love you," she said, kissing his lips briefly.

She took him to her bed gently pushing him down. After sliding the pajama top from her arms, she bent over him to kiss his belly. The way his abdominal muscles contracted and the soft noise he made from pulling in air excited her. She kept her eyes on his face as she removed his pajama bottoms. He looked frightened yet eager and ready to take her as his lover. She straddled his hips, reaching down to take him in her hand. Her eyes studied his reaction as his mouth dropped open into an O while he struggled to maintain eye contact with her. Masako was apprehensive about taking his virginity. Since it had been almost six years since her last sexual encounter, it could very well be like her first time all over again as well. Raising her hips, she guided him inside of her. She observed his eyes fluttering closed while his fingers grasped the pillow behind his head as if it were a lifeline to the real world to remind him this was not a dream. Her eyes ravenously took in the beautiful sight of him biting his lower lip while his sweet, handsome face twisted with the agony and ecstasy of officially losing his virginity as he indulged in the pleasures of a woman's body for the first time. His moan was like a melodious and arousing symphony of bliss that made her want to thrust him into her body at a blazing speed, but she withheld from the impulse to sway her hips slowly back and forth.

"Oh, Near," she moaned, sliding her arms around his neck when he sat up to hold her.

"This feels so good. I-I never imagined – " His words were interrupted with a groan of pleasure he could not hold back as she continued to move him inside of her.

Masako shrieked with surprise then dissolved into giggles when he rolled her over onto her back. She was more than happy to allow him to be on top to do with her whatever he wanted. Her arms slid around his shoulders, holding him close to her while he made love to her. She had no idea what he had been reading or what kind of fantasies he had been having, but saying it's the thought that counts held true in this case. Whatever he had been thinking, he was making a reality and it was magnificent. Her tender, kind lover surprised her again when he transformed into a sexual beast thrusting into her with short, powerful strokes that he punctuated with a grunt because of the effort he was using. This was a shocking and pleasurable development that ripped his name from her lips over and over.

"Near, oh, god," she cried out, digging her fingernails into his skin as she held his waist.

"Masako, you're mine forever right?" he asked her, licking her neck from her shoulder to her ear lobe.

It was strange but she liked it. Her body shivered beneath his and it took her a moment to find her voice. "Yes, oh, yes, I'm yours."

"Marry me on my twentieth birthday," he demanded more than asked.

"I will," she told him, pressing her mouth to his. It was unfair that he would be making such a request at a time like this. She would have told him yes whenever he asked so timing was not everything. Her body quaked violently as the orgasm began causing her to writhe and moan helplessly under him.

"What's happening?" he asked her, his voice hitching as his climax came.

"It's called an orgasm, honey. Enjoy it," Masako advised him. Like a true voyeur, she stared at the expression of sheer euphoric torture on his face as he experienced his first orgasm with her. She held him as he trembled uncontrollably and his emotions overwhelmed him along with the pleasure. Whispering declarations of her love to him, she held him as he shuddered occasionally from the aftershocks of pleasure that shook his body. She kissed away the tears that had fallen from the stunning strength of the emotions that came with the physical bliss.

Near dotted kisses all over her face in gratitude and love. She had always been able to make him experience powerful emotions that he had never felt before and now was no different. The physical pleasure had been unexpected in its devastating force.

"That was amazing," he whispered, kissing her passionately.

"Want to do it again?" Masako asked, kissing his chest.

"Oh, yes."

~\..'../~

Over one year later…

Masako walked out to the tree under which Near sat with Hideki building a castle made of dice. A smile curled her lips because it was the tree Near had been sitting under when she saw him for the first time. She touched her part of L still here on earth, uselessly trying to smooth down his black hair. Her eyes roved over the pair and she could not help but smile wider. Hideki was sitting like his father used to, crouched down on his feet with his knees to his chest. He was even chewing on his thumb as he looked at the tower contemplating if he should put on another die or if it would topple the structure. Near sat beside him in the half crouch while twisting a piece of hair around his finger as he considered building the protective wall higher. He had developed insomnia and the dark under eye circles like L had; it must be something that comes with their special brand of genius. She just hoped Near would not have to pay the same price L did.

Masako waited and observed them quietly. She did not want to disturb them yet. Near had just returned home from Japan after assisting with a kidnapping case that ended happily with the child being returned to her parents safe and without injury. He had been quite shaken up by the whole event because the little girl had been seven years old, the same age as Hideki.

Sitting on the bench close to them, she toyed with the silver wedding band monogrammed with an old English script M and N on her left hand ring finger. Near wore a matching one. For his twentieth birthday, he had wanted a wife so he got one. Their wedding ceremony was held in this very spot. She had something important to tell Near, but it could wait just a little while.

"What is it?" Near inquired, sitting on the bench beside her. He put his arm around her to draw her close to his side.

"It's nothing. I – " Her words were cut off by a tender kiss.

"Don't lie to me. I know you better than that. Tell me," he insisted, holding her gaze.

"I heard from Mello," she murmured, but that was not the news she wanted to tell him.

Mello would send the occasional email to inform them that he was still alive. Sometimes he would include banal details like he was enjoying a beach or skiing down mountains. He would never say exactly where he was located and why he was really there. Mello had made a rare appearance for the wedding to give her away to her groom but immediately departed afterward without a word. They hoped that one of these days he would return to them, but it did not seem likely.

"That's not it. I'm glad to hear he's doing well but that's not what was giving you that faraway look in your eyes," he said after she filled him in on the details of Mello's latest adventure through a desert somewhere on the globe.

He knew her too well. With a sheepish grin of feigned innocence, Masako's heart sped up when she prepared to tell him the big news.

"What do you want for your twenty first birthday?" she asked him, looking into his eyes.

"But that's seven months away. What does it matter? What could you give me that I don't already have to make me happy?" He put his arms around her, kissing her briefly on the lips.

"What about a baby? Would you like to be a daddy?" Her eyes searched his as he stared at her blankly in shock. When he did not react for an uncomfortably long time, she began to chew on her lower lip nervously.

"Really? Do you mean it? I'm going to be a father," he said as if he did not believe it. Perhaps hearing the words again would make it more real. He pressed his lips to hers for a fervent kiss.

"Eww! Mom! Near!" Hideki whined upon being subjected to their unusually long and ardent display of affection.

"Baby, how would you like a brother or sister?" Masako asked Hideki.

"Okay I guess. It could be cool to be a big brother," he replied half-heartedly, continuing to build the castle.

Masako was disappointed by the lack of reaction but she had to remember who had helped spawn this child. His father had been the ultimate under-reactor. She smiled rubbing her belly and thinking of the new life inside of her. While looking at the man next to her, she wondered what this child would be like.

Seven months later, a baby girl they named Nataniela after her father. She was a beautiful little girl with her father's white hair and her mother's dark brown eyes. The child also possessed the feisty stubbornness of her mother. Two years after her birth, they had their third and final child, a boy they named River also after his father. He had dark brown hair and dark gray eyes. He was shy and withdrawn like his father. These children would grow up to be Y and Z, following in the footsteps of their half-brother, Hideki and father, Near.