note: Hey it's me with a one-shot! Sorry, I got a little wrapped up in Serenity for a few weeks, heh. (go check it out if you haven't already, it's my new undercover baby). Shameless, blatant advertising over, this is a little something I wrote a few weeks ago. It's… different. And loosely inspired by the quote below these notes here. I can't really remember how it came about, but I think I read a fic in which something like this happened, but I wanted to put my own spin on it and tell this view another way. I don't know; I'm making this up. Anyway, once I heard the song, the idea bloomed more and I wrote it whilst sitting on my floor and eating some form of food. I do remember that bit.
warning: Actually, this isn't a warning, it's more of a disclaimer. This contains cheating and general unfaithfulness in relationships. I, personally, do not share the view that this is either a good or a bad thing, and I am not saying I think the characters do, either. The whole point of the fic is that they've acted on impulse, without thinking of the consequences. I found this a particularly interesting thing to write about, that's all. Just sayin'. Also Tony sounds kind of… violent. That's accidental; he just turned out like this. I'm not meaning to say I think their relationship will be like that, it just happened.
disclaimer: You know you're obsessed with NCIS when you stay up until 6:30 am, showing your sister NCIS clips on YouTube, then reading fanfiction. Yes, really. :D
listening to: Kangaroo Cry, by Blue October.
incredible love, you fill me...
but the smell of your skin makes me stay.
-incredible love, ingrid michaelson
She knows this is wrong. She knows she should just get up and leave, before they both get in too deep.
But his hands won't stop moving and his fingers drag down her skin, making her back arch and her thoughts switch just so. His mouth is soft and slow on hers and she can't stop herself from whimpering slightly as his fingernails lightly scratch down her spine and his lips do something incredible all at the same time.
She tries to move away but nothing complies and she daren't try harder. She pushes herself forward slightly, and his hand automatically moves with her; pulling her near, and she her eyes close even tighter as she lets herself fall.
Well, they've always been in too deep.
The sheets shift on top of them as he tucks her underneath him, arms coming up on either side of her shoulders as he braces himself, hovering above her, and she grins into the kiss whilst pushing herself to be even closer to him. It's been too long.
Somehow, however, this new arrangement has left far too much space between them, and she longs to feel his skin on hers once more.
Her hands find themselves at his neck, thumbs half-playing with the unruly strands of hair that sit there, fingers linked together as she pulls him closer. He chuckles and kisses her back, more slowly, his fingers now tracing patterns on her hip as he lowers himself back to the bed to be on his side.
She laughs, too, and breaks the caress only to plant three more breathless kisses to his lips. His arms come up to wrap round her waist and the kiss turns more heated and there's no going back. Again.
.
.
She ponders leaving, again, at an early hour of the next day.
The air is thick and raw, her skin feeling rather heavy itself, and she thinks that maybe the afterglow has just worn off. Deep breaths push themselves from her mouth and she hears him do the same. Thoughts slow down, down, down, and rationality is put aside for the fifth time tonight.
Her eyes are heavy, too, and whilst she attempts to stifle a yawn, her head shifts and finds itself burying into Tony's chest, of its own accord. She blinks as his smell surrounds her- deep and warm and familiar, and home. It fills her lungs and makes her head spin and warrants every question an answer in mere moments. That scent, of all things, lulls her into sleep with a distinct feeling of being safe.
She thinks that, just before she drifts off completely, a hand tightens itself on her waist and someone sighs.
But she could just be imagining it.
.
.
She hears him wake probably before even he knows it. The telltale ruffling of sheets, the quiet yawn followed by a satisfied-sounding noisy stretch.
The sudden sound of someone sitting bolt upright.
He moves eventually, swinging his legs round to mirror her position; perched on the side of the bed. His fingers brush hers and she flinches, wincing as he pulls them straight back, clearly attempting to find somewhere else to put them.
"You're... leaving?"
His voice is weak but he does nothing about it, and she casts a guilty look to the floor. Considering he's the one wearing nothing, and she's fully-clothed, she feels remarkably exposed.
She only nods in response to his question.
"Why?"
"I... I have to see him. I can't do this, Tony- I can't cheat on him."
She hopes he doesn't notice the fact that she can't bring herself to say the name of the man she is supposedly in love with.
"Right."
His voice is no longer weak; it's forcibly calm, anger and frustration riddled through it. It sounds so much like he once sounded, in a bathroom, in the midst of apologies and explanations.
It's this fact that forces her to make up her mind.
She turns to look at him, not expecting the intensity of his gaze and shuddering momentarily. He opens his mouth to say something she thinks she won't quite be able to cope with, but gets stopped suddenly by a pair of lips. Herlips.
It's slow and frustrated and intense, but it answers questions she simply has no time to explain right now, and shuts Tony up.
"I do not know who, but I think someone once said that if you love two people at the same time, you should choose the second one, because if you really loved the first one you wouldn't have fallen for the second. That is not quite what has happened, but..."
Her partner's eyes widen and his breath catches in his throat as he brings his hand to her cheek. His touch is possessive and quite forceful, yet it doesn't hurt her.
"I am going, to break it off with him." she tells him, eyes trained on his because she's not quite sure how else to convey her sincerity. He just nods in response and kisses her, hard.
His eyes are veiled with something unexplainable as they say quiet, temporary goodbyes, and she exits with the intention of returning as soon as the necessary deed has been done.
.
.
He opens the door after what seems like an eternity, and she moves into his arms before the door is even properly closed. She knows it may be a little forward or fast, but she just needs someone to hold her as this sinks in.
He kisses her when she takes a step back, sliding her jacket off her shoulders and running a hand down her back in the process. She gasps and returns the embrace with equal force, and he's pressed her up against the wall within seconds.
.
.
She wonders later why she felt as if her world had been off-centre the whole past day. Like her feelings were drowning her consuming her and forcing everything to spill out.
But, then again, they've always been in too deep.
note: The quote was, apparently, by Johnny Depp. I figured Tony'd probably know that, but I thought it would be a bit of a mood killer for him to point that out.
Fun fact about Kiera, she likes reviews.