I still felt queasy from last night, finding out that the "chocolate chip" cookie was an oatmeal raisin cookie. I've been vomiting ever since the incident. I think Samus didn't wash her hands before making them. Anyway, the loudspeaker made an announcement while I was playing a friendly match of air hockey with Ganondorf.

"Will Bowser Koopa please report to the office? That's Bowser Koopa to Master Hand's office." the loudspeaker said. I was really worried about what Master Hand was going to say to me. Maybe it was regarding the Squirtles I ate last month. Or it was how I accidentally broke Princess Peach's lamp. Curious, I trudged to Master Hand's office.

"Hello Bowser." Master Hand said. I sat down on a plush seat, worried about being reprimanded for the lamp or the Squirtle.

"Hi." I said, trembling.

"What seems to be the matter?" the gloved hand asked me.

"I thought that I'm in trouble for eating some Squirtles last month." I replied.

"No, you're not in trouble for that. I'm asking you to interview some applicants for Super Smash Bros 4." it offered. A white paper appeared in my hands, as I looked at the job offer.

Job: Interviewer

Type: Part Time

Experience: Brawl Veteran or higher

Location: Smashwood Soundstage B

Salary: $2500

Description: The Smash Boards are looking for Super Smash Bros veterans to interview new Super Smash Bros applicants. You will be interviewing Nintendo characters who have applied to join Super Smash Bros. You will be also interviewing 3rd party characters too. Accept 3rd party characters that have appeared in at least one (1) game for a Nintendo System.

"I'll take it." I said. I haven't been earning enough income ever since Super Smash Bros is on hiatus and will return in the spring.

"Come back here and I'll warp you there." it said.

The next day:

I walked in the office to see Master Hand sitting behind its desk. Without saying a word, a purple aura appeared around me. I was teleported to a talk show-style room. Sitting in a leather chair was a young boy dressed in an all-black sleeveless jumpsuit and brown combat boots. A spiky pauldron rested on his left shoulder, which matched his metal wristbans. His young look can be told by his piercing cyan eyes and blond spiky hair. Beside his chair was a giant steel sword, around the same height as me. He handed me his application.

Super Smash Bros 4 Character auditions

Your Character: Cloud Strife

Weapons (your best): Buster Sword, Materia,

Armor (your best): Ziedrich, Metal Pauldron, Ribbon (I know it's sissy, but at least it can make me immune to status ailments)

Your Skills: Omnislash, Braver, Cross-Slash, Blade Beam, Chimhazzard, Finishing Touch, Meteorain

Your Abilities: Superhuman strength and speed, experienced sword training

What game are you from?: Final Fantasy VII, Playstation

I cringed at the word "Playstation" and remembered something.

"Do not accept any 3rd party characters that have not appeared on a game for a Nintendo System." I looked at Cloud to say something.

"Hey I'm sorry, but it's Smash Boards policy. We can't have you in the game." I said sadly.

"WHAT? WHY?" he yelled.

"It's that, you never appeared in a Nintendo game. You said that your game 'Final Fantasy VII' is for the Playstation." I replied.

"OH REALLY? MY FRANCHISE ONCE WORKED WITH NINTENDO, AND I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE ON THE NINTENDO 64! I ALSO HAVE A GAME ON THE NINTENDO 3DS!" Cloud raged. He picked up his giant sword and looked like he was going to attack me.

"OK. After you calm down, we'll start the interview." I panicked. Cloud let his sword rest on the seat as he sat back down.

"So Cloud, what is your reason for joining Super Smash Bros?" I asked. Cloud took a few sips of water before answering.

"I've read a couple Super Smash Bros fanfictions about me being in the series and my fans want me to be in Super Smash Bros. Gaming fan sites said that I have potential to join. I wanted to grant their wish and shock the gaming websites, despite my company discouraging me from joining." Cloud replied.

"Seems that you have a good fanbase. Can you tell me about your achievements in your games?" I said.

"You may know me from defeating Sephiroth, but I've done a couple other feats too. I've survived long falls and shrugged off multiple impalements." Cloud answered.

"You have potential." I said. "Why not put your application in the 'Possible' box?"

"Thanks!" Cloud walked over to the red box. A label saying 'Possible' was taped on to the box. At the moment Cloud placed his application into the box, a bullet pierced through Cloud and I twice.

"Ow!" we both yelled. Part of the back wall exploded and a heavily armed soldier entered through the hole.

"That was for rejecting me in Brawl!" the soldier said before flipping us off and leaving.

"Who was that guy?" Cloud asked me.

"That was Master Chief. Mario did the interviews last tournament and rejected him because he only appeared on the Xbox. Because of that, he holds a grunge on me, the Smashers and applicants like you." Ganondorf walked in and saw us lying down. He went backstage to call an ambulance or something.

"Master Hand should force Bowser to interview the possible SSB4 newcomers. And after each interview, he either gets injured or faints and the person puts their application in the "POSSIBLE" box." – writes4u

You can suggest characters to be interviewed. They can be Nintendo or 3rd party characters. 3rd party characters will be accepted if the character has at least one game on a Nintendo System. For example, Master Chief is not allowed, due to his Xbox-only games. Altair is accepted because he has a game on the Nintendo DS (Altair's Chronicles)