first person / do you remember

Description: Do you remember... him? How things were, once? Sometimes... I miss it.

Missing Him

"Do you remember?" I asked.

"Remember what?"

"How things used to be? Y'know... before Chiro came?"

"Of course I do."

"But... do you remember... what he was like at first? How... different he was back then? Or... have you forgotten?"

"I haven't forgotten. I'll never forget."

I stared off in the distance. "Sometimes I do," I whispered. "Sometimes... I can only remember the bad guy. Sometimes... I forget the old Mandarin. How... patient he was. How he used to laugh and joke with us.. The memories are fuzzier and fuzzier - like I don't want to remember the good Mandarin. But I do! I want to remember what he was like so long ago and I never want to forget him... But I just can't help it.

"Maybe I want to forget the good Mandarin and only remember the bad because it makes it harder to fight him when I remember... when I remember how when we would feel bad about something and he would... he would just listen. He didn't call us weak or selfish or... or accuse us of shirking responsibility. He helped us. I don't want to forget those moments.

"Or the moments when he would make a game out of training... or just all of the times we used to have together.

"But... every time I remember those times, I remember the bad times. I remember how... he would yell and break things. How he forced us to train harder and never let us rest. How he would ridicule us for all of our mistakes.

"I remember all that, and I compare the two in my mind... and I just can't see it. I can't... I can't remember the good guy. And as time goes on... the memories... they're fading. I don't want them to fade! I want them... I want them to stay!" I was crying by the end of it, finding myself wrapped in a warm embrace. It hurt. It really did.

I didn't know what to do anymore.

Chiro is a great kid; he's a good leader. But sometimes... sometimes I just want Mandarin back.

Sometimes, I wish Mandarin had never left.

Tauria: So... I have no idea who this was supposed to be. I wrote it forever ago, and just re-found it. I read it over, thought it was good, and decided to post it! ^^ I hope you enjoyed.