Disclaimer: I don't own. If I did a lot of crazy stuff would occur.
A/N: Yup, the crazy keeps on coming. Me and my friend just love screwing with The Doctor's life. :)
One day The Doctor came across a huge bag of jelly babies. He absolutely LOVED them, he still does to this day, but after the events that occurred last year he can no longer look at them in the same way.
Fortunately:
River doesn't know about his secret supply of jelly babies he keeps hidden underneath his bed.
Unfortunately:
He was reaching for the bag of jelly babies when River appeared suddenly in his doorway.
Fortunately:
She didn't seem to know the reason behind him crouching underneath his bed.
Unfortunately:
Once River catches a whiff of him doing BAD things, she will do anything to get the truth out of him.
Fortunately:
She droped the issue, long enough for The Doctor to move his stash. She in fact seemed far more interested in the TARDIS's fine wine collection from across the galaxies.
Unfortunately:
Wine and The Doctor don't mix, he is an utter lightweight. It only took two glasses to get him drunk.
Fortunately:
His wife was as equally drunk as he was.
Unfortunately:
When The Doctor gets drunk he starts to talk (more than the usual ramble that comes out of his mouth) ... the personal stuff.
Fortunately:
The Doctor looked over to River and it looked like she was about to pass any minute now.
Unfortunately:
The Doctor had been wrong in his presumption
Fortunately:
River was too busy to listen to what he was saying. She was far too busy trying to attack his lips.
Unfortunately:
When he mumbled the word jelly babies through the kiss, she began to listen to what he had to say (him and his big mouth).
Fortunately:
Before River could decipher what The Doctor was saying about jelly babies, he started to talk about potatoes (potatoes are cool).
Unfortunately:
River would not let it go. She knew The Doctor too well.
Fortunately:
The next day The Doctor was craving a bacon sandwich so River made him one. Whilst she was doing that he had time to think about a way out of the jelly baby situation.
Unfortunately:
River looked on the TARDIS's CCTV camera and inevitably found out the truth about the jelly bay incident.
Fortunately:
It was time to come out of the cupboard and tell her the truth she had been waiting so long to hear.
Unfortunately:
The Doctor told River of how he dated the queen jelly baby for a while and made part jelly baby, part Timelord babies. When he had finished River fainted.
Fortunately:
When River came round she had forgiven him.
Unfortunately:
She tends to get super protective of him when there are jelly babies around.
Think very carefully about this when you're eating jelly babies next ... um ye, eating The Doctor's children ... probably not the best idea.
Yes he did it again. He fathered a child with an inanimate object. Review if you want to see the family reunion Leonardo the fez, and his three other jelly baby babies. :)