Disclaimer: I do not own
A/N: Based on the song every time we touch – cascada.
The Doctor felt his soul rip from his body from the moment the word goodbye slipped from his lips. In return he felt his wife's soul fall heavily into his hearts.
This was the last time he would see River, for this was the day she left for the library, the day she left his life forever.
When she transported herself away he felt the life fade from him. The man River had made him died in that moment. It was the fast fading echo that entered the big blue box. He felt the TARDIS reaching out to him. Her cool tendrils wrapped around his mind. She was mourning for the loss of the child of the TARDIS.
He pushed the TARDIS away from his mind. He had prepared himself for River's departure a long time ago. It didn't make it hurt any less though, it just made his pain a little more bearable, a little less overpowering.
Defeated the raggedy man dropped his top hat on the ground with a clatter. He found himself walking aimlessly through the TARDIS corridors only to find he had sub consciously walked straight into River's room. The room that they had shared on many an occasion. He strolled over to the big double bed and dropped onto it tiredly. The deep blue covers still smelt of her. They smelt powerful, and divine. The two words summed up his wife to the letter.
He closed his eyes as the heavy weight he had been carrying around for the whole day crashed down on him.
" Hello Sweetie." The ghost of her voice whispered from close by.
Even here in his dreams she was haunting him.
Arms wrapped around his waist, and he was wrapped in a layer of warmth. The hairs on the back of his neck stood up on end as the tingle of breath specked against him.
Thick salty tears leaked from under his closed eyelids.
He still felt her touch. It was like the mere memory of her was reaching out to him.
The Doctor could have been lying there for days. He wasn't counting. He didn't care. He didn't care about much these days. All three Ponds were gone from his life. He had once again lost a family through the stupidity of his actions.
He could tell that he was slowly wasting away into nothingness. The TARDIS occasionally jolted him awake, but reality was starting to become a distant concept.
Here he could be with her. In reality he was alone. A mad old man who had nobody.
He started building barriers in his mind, blocking his much loved ship out.
"You need to wake up." Her voice trickled against him.
"I can't." He whispered back.
"You'll die if you don't." She warned him. She had always worried about him. It seemed death hadn't stopped her doing that.
"I'm already dead. Without you I'm not alive. I can't survive without you." He told her firmly.
" This is what happens when you get sentimental." He could almost hear a sigh in her words.
River's angelic features danced in his mind. Her hands were gently raking through his thick mop of hair. An electric bolt of emotion travelled down the length of his spine. Every time she touched him it was like a wave of static hit him.
Her lips traced his own. His mind soared above every star in the universe.
Her heart was pounding alongside his.
That was the only tiny piece of his dream that shattered the wall of the fantasy. The universe had decided to stop the fluttering of her heart a long time ago.
Her arms locked around him like a fort. She was his strength, his foundation, the castle protecting his from the harsh reality of things.
His tears had long gone. He was with her. He had no need to cry.
He and River had become inseparable since the moment her lips had breathed life into his lifeless form in Berlin. Good times and bad times. They had been through them all. Even now she seemed to refuse to leave his side.
A small, mischievous smile wrapped round her features, "Find me." She ushered in his ear, "You saved me. Find me."
River's image disappeared, and he was alone. His first reaction was to panic. His second was to bolt awake. His third was to laugh like a maniac as he realised what his wife had meant.
He had saved her, and in return she was saving him.
She always knew how to make him rise when he had fallen, and this time he had fallen so fast, and so far.
He dragged his weakened form from the bed and into the console room, and punched in coordinates to a place where anything was possible. As he watched the engines move up and down he couldn't help but think of her.
Her gentle touch.
Her kiss.
The way she made his hearts soar.
He needed her by her side. The real her. All this time he had been thinking about it wrong. He hadn't lost her.
As soon as the TARDIS landed he heard the doors swing open, and bang shut again. He didn't turn around. He didn't dare to.
He waited for her hand to slip into his.
Locking eyes with her, one more tear dropped down his cheek.
She caught it.
All he had dreamt about since he had been apart from her was for her to be back in his life. He hadn't thought, not for one second that perhaps he should have become part of hers instead.
He leant his head down, and kissed her until neither could breath.
Every time they touched it was magical feeling.
Please leave a review x
A/N: I'm taking song based fic requests. Any song. Any pairing. Any theme. I'll write it.