The moment that his psycho bitch cousin raised her wand Sirius Black knew that he was going to die and he was okay with that. Sirius' life had not been an easy one, especially the last 15 years, and he was more than ready for it to be over.

He didn't even try to get out of the way of Bellatrix's curse. His eyes widened in startled surprise, though when he realised that all she'd hit him with was a banishing curse. It would hurt like a bitch when he slammed into whatever wall was behind him but a banishing curse wasn't anywhere near his cousin's usual murderous standards. Then, though Sirius remembered where they were.

They were in the Death Chamber and Bellatrix had just banished him straight towards the Veil. 'Oh well,' he thought philosophically. At least it would be an easy death; far more merciful than he deserved, really.

It was as though everything was happening in slow motion. Sirius closed his eyes to accept his fate. Then, though a distraught scream intruded on his thoughts. "NO! SIRIUS!"

Sirius' eyes shot open again. Harry. His beloved godson. The only thing Sirius would regret leaving behind.

It was thoughts of his godson which had kept him alive in Azkaban. It was thoughts of Harry which had motivated him to summon all of his waning strength and break out of the torturous island prison. It was also for Harry's sake he'd fought to stay one step ahead of the Ministry during the two years he'd spent on the run and struggled to stay sane this past year locked up in his mother's house.

He couldn't do it anymore, though. He wasn't strong enough. Sirius hated himself for leaving his godson behind but Harry would be alright in the end. There were plenty of people, much better than him, who would look after his godson after he was gone.

Sirius would be lying if he said he hadn't suffered through countless hours of jealousy over the past decade and a half that all those people were getting to spend time with Harry while he was rotting in prison, accused of a crime he would never have even dreamed of committing. Now, though he knew that it was for the best he leave Harry to their care. He was an unstable wreck, irreparably broken by Azkaban. Remus, Albus and the Weasleys, on the other hand, were stronger and infinitely more stable. They would do a much better job of taking care of Harry than he ever could.

On the other hand what, exactly, had they done to take care of Harry in the past?

Sirius had never had the courage to sit down with his godson and get all the details about Harry's life because that would mean facing up to just how badly he'd let James and Lily down. He had heard snippets of information, though, small bits of information gleaned from Harry's letters, his godson's friends and other members of the Order of the Phoenix.

What Sirius had heard had left him outraged. Nobody deserved to be treated like that, especially not his beloved godson. Petunia was supposed to love Harry in James and Lily's stead and yet Harry had needed to threaten her with his supposedly murderous godfather in order to get basic necessities like good and clothing? On what level was that acceptable?

More to the point how had Albus missed that, especially with his squib spy Arabella Figg living just down the street? For that matter how had Albus, Molly and Arthur missed the abuse going on in Surrey when three of the Weasley kids had been forced to rescue Harry from a room with seven locks and a cat flap on the door and bars covering the windows?

And that wasn't even touching on all the shit Sirius had heard about in the years since Harry had started Hogwarts. Possessed defence teachers? Wraiths of Voldemort? Basilisks? Dementors? That fucking tournament? It wasn't a school Albus was running. It was a fucking madhouse.

Sirius was on the run from the law, a kill-on-sight order hanging over his head, and he was still sure that he could do a better job of taking care of Harry than others had been doing in his stead.

That was when Sirius Black's life changed forever. He could be doing a better job of taking care of Harry. He should be doing a better job of taking care of Harry. The only reason he hadn't already stepped in was because he feared Harry's reaction when the boy inevitably realised just how badly he'd been let down by his godfather. By rights Harry should hate him for everything that had happened but for some inexplicable reason Harry loved him. The night he'd been reunited with his godson and Harry had agreed to move in with him had been one of the best nights in Sirius' miserable life. Harry's love was all that was keeping him going right now and Sirius didn't know what he'd do if his godson rejected him now.

'But Harry hasn't rejected you,' a voice in the back of his mind reminded him. Harry knew all the facts and still loved him. And how was Sirius going to repay that love? By giving up and letting himself be murdered, leaving Harry in the care of people who had only ever done a mediocre, at best, job of caring for him. How selfish could he possibly be?

Sirius knew, in that moment, that he couldn't let Bellatrix kill him. No matter how crappy things were, for Harry's sake, he had to keep going.

Suddenly he felt a fire inside of him that hadn't burned since James was alive. Using reflexes that hadn't been necessary since the day he was an active Order member, out in the field fighting Voldemort and the deatheaters, at the last possible second Sirius spun out of the way of Bellatrix's spell, simultaneously casting a disillusionment charm on himself.

"NO! SIRIUS!" he heard his godson scream again.

Looking back into the Chamber where the battle was still raging Sirius could see Harry being held back from the Veil by Remus. He realised that he'd been so close to the Veil that when he'd spun out of the way and disillusioned himself, to any onlookers it would have appeared that he'd actually fallen through the bloody thing. Right now, Sirius realised, everyone believed he had died.

Sirius' every instinct screamed at him to go to his godson and reassure him but something held him back. Going to his godson now would just put himself back into the fray of battle and, knowing his luck, get him re-captured by the Ministry.

As hard as it was for now, at least, he had to stay put.

He stepped back into the shadows and watched as Remus physically dragged Harry away from the Veil. 'So now he gives a damn about James and Lily's son,' Sirius thought sneeringly.

The moment when he'd confronted Pettigrew two years ago aside, Sirius didn't think he'd ever been so furious as he had been when he'd discovered that Remus and Harry were not a part of each other's lives. For all those years in Azkaban Sirius had comforted himself with the thought that at least in his absence Remus would be taking care of Harry but it turned out that when James and Lily died Remus had turned his back on the baby who'd called him 'Unca Mooey' and hadn't so much as sent him a letter before or after his brief tenure as Hogwarts defence professor. The two old marauders had had a huge fight about that. Sirius wasn't about to let anyone get away with hurting his godson, even his friends.

Then again, were he and Remus even friends anymore? Sirius wondered darkly.

He and Remus were old friends, forever connected by a dark past but what about the present? After James and Lily died he had been consigned to Azkaban while Remus had continued with as normal a life as possible. They were totally different people now, irreversibly altered by the long years they'd spent apart and Sirius couldn't reconcile who Remus was now to the person Remus once and been.

As hard as he tried Sirius couldn't completely forgive Remus for thinking that he had been the one to betray the Potters and the only time they ever really talked these days was when Remus, unable to see that he had changed from the rash, impulsive idiot he'd been as a teenager, wanted to lecture him about his so-called immaturity. They still interacted with each other but no, they weren't really friends. There were actually times when Sirius found his former friend even more patronising that Molly Weasley. Really, the only people Sirius would call his friends these days were old Mad-Eye Moody and, surprisingly, in spite of who his mother was, Bill Weasley.

Sticking to the shadows Sirius followed along as the battle moved to the atrium and more Ministry workers arrived. It took all of his self control not to charge in when he saw Harry crossing wands with Voldemort. Where the hell was Dumbledore? How could he let a 15 year old deal with this alone? Then again Dumbledore had let Harry deal with a lot on his own over the years. The Headmaster of Hogwarts had dropped the ball on multiple occasions when it came to the health and welfare of Sirius' godson.

And that was what got the old marauder thinking. Why did Harry have to do what Dumbledore said? The man was only his headmaster, not his father or his guardian. For that matter why did any of them have to do what Dumbledore said? Yes the old man was commonly acknowledged as the only person Voldemort had ever feared but that didn't make him god and as most of his decisions had been seriously suspect of late it really made no sense that they were all continuing to follow him blindly.

Sirius' status as a wanted fugitive meant that he'd been extremely isolated these past few years. For safety's sake aside from Harry Order members were the only ones he'd associated with and even if they didn't like or care about him they had, at least, accepted he was innocent of the crimes that he'd been accused of. Maybe it was time to seek out some new allies.

It would have to be used extremely carefully but even as a fugitive his status as the last surviving male Black meant he had a lot of power he could use to help Harry and against Voldemort. Even better if he could reach out to some of his old friends, the ones who weren't in the Order, and could persuade them he was innocent, he wouldn't be alone in this venture.

Sirius breathed a sigh of relief as Dumbledore finally arrived and stepped into the duel between Harry and Voldemort. At the same time Mad-Eye Moody looked directly at him and nodded once. Sirius remembered that with his creepy eye Mad-Eye could see through disillusionment charms so would know where he was. Sirius didn't know whether Mad-Eye somehow knew what he was planning and was pledging his support or whether the old aurour was just letting him know he knew he was alive. Either way it was kind of nice knowing he had an ally, at least in some capacity.

Sirius knew that Mad-Eye felt guilty for his involvement in his botched arrest 15 years earlier. The only ones Sirius blamed were Crouch, Bangold and, to a lesser degree, Dumbledore but maybe Mad-Eye would still help him protect Harry in the name of atonement.

And that was what it all came down to, really. Protecting Harry. Sirius knew that he had been a pretty poor godfather so far so it was long past time that he step up to his responsibilities and give Harry the kind of life James and Lily had wanted for their only child.

Sirius looked around the atrium and saw that it was now flooded with Ministry workers, all of whom had their eyes glued to the duel between Dumbledore and Voldemort. He knew that pretty soon the entire Ministry building would be locked down so an investigation could take place and that he needed to get out of here before that because no disillusionment charm was powerful enough to shield him from the scanning spells aurours always used in the initial stages of every investigation they carried out.

He took one last look at his godson, now crouched behind the ruins of the Fountain of Magical Brethren. He felt guilty for maintaining the illusion that he had died but for now that was the way it had to be.

Not for long, though. Sirius would get all his ducks in a row and then he would reveal his presence, at least to Harry.

Things were going to be very, very different from now on.