Fridge Horror

The Monday that episode 59, Staff Spirit, was posted, Fitz watches his first LBD episode and realised, to his horror, how spectacularly his attempt to improve Lizzie's opinion of Darcy backfired.

Fridge Horror is, simply put, when something becomes terrifying after the fact. (TvTropes)

This is a fanfiction of The Lizzie Bennet Diaries, which is a modern-day adaptation of Pride and Prejudice in video blog form. You can find it on Youtube by searching Lizzie Bennet/Lizzie Bennet Diaries. It is a beautifully written and wonderfully acted series that I would recommend to all P&P fans. If you haven't seen it, go check it out!

(I wrote this at midnight, okay. Any mistakes can be attributed to that.)

Fitz Williams was not a morning person.

Actually, to be more accurate, he wasn't a Monday morning person. Sitting in his office on a Monday morning reading a report on the frankly boring activities of Collins and Collins wasn't helping him wake up. Not even a third into the report, he was nodding off, despite the two coffees he'd consumed already. Or maybe it was three. Who was counting anyway?

It didn't help, of course, that it was Darcy's report and that his friend had asked him to look over it. Fitz could sit and list Darcy's virtues if someone asked him, careful being one, as he would never submit any report without having a third person check it first for errors, but clearly brevity was not his forte. How Darcy managed to write so much about Collins and Collins' activities was beyond Fitz's comprehension. Then again, the report was to be submitted to dear ol' Catherine, who probably wouldn't read it and would just be impressed by its length and the very fact that it was Darcy who wrote it.

So why was Fitz reading it again?

He really didn't know.

He slapped the novella down on the table and turned to his computer. It would keep till later. Now, he needed something to wake him up. Maybe some cat videos on Youtube?

Youtube made him think of Lizzie.

Despite her "condition" that he couldn't watch her old videos, he didn't even have time in the past week to watch the one he appeared in yet, what with Darcy pushing the report writing process. Maybe it would be interesting to see how Lizzie ended up editing their little sessions together.

He did a search for Lizzie and her channel popped up right away. A glance at the view counts of past videos astonished him. He knew Lizzie was a cool girl and was perfectly able to draw people in, but wow, he didn't realise what a popular vlog he was appearing in. She probably could pay off half her student loans with the revenue from these. He wondered why so far on Collins seemed to have approached her with offers. Then again, she did turn down Collins, she might turn down others as well. But with what he'd seen of her vlogging style, and with these views, she could make her living from Youtube if she wished, maybe branch out to other types of videos, not just person vlogs as well?

Still thinking more or less in this vein, Fitz clicked on the latest video with his face in the thumbnail, the one where they had put together the care package for Lizzie's sister. It promised to be a fun video; they got up to all sorts of goofiness…

...Except that just 20 seconds into the video, Fitz suddenly was filled with a strange sort of dread. Before he came into the room, Lizzie had mentioned that her sister, Jane, was feeling down and apparently it was related to Bing.

Bing. She must mean Bing Lee.

"Please don't let this mean what I think it mean," Fitz moaned to himself as he listened to Lizzie's words again, just to make sure she did say what he thought she said.

Crap. Jane Bennet was apparently upset about Bing Lee.

And Bing Lee had just broken up with his girlfriend, on the advice of Darcy.

And Fitz had just told Lizzie all about it, in an attempt to persuade Lizzie to think better of Darcy.

"Stupid, stupid, stupid." If there was ever need for a facepalm, it was now.

Fitz barely listened as the video continued playing, showing how they put together the care package for Jane. He was trying to not drown himself in the irony of his buying her chocolates to cheer her up while bragging to her sister about how his friend more or less caused her sadness in the first place.

He forced himself to watch Lizzie's facial expression as she listened to him trying to tell her about what a loyal friend Darcy was, because he had to admit when they filmed this, he was too distracted by the box of goodies and wasn't really looking at her reactions. He didn't even notice how stiff she sounded. How could he have missed that? But now, seeing the way Lizzie was looking into the camera, there was no doubt to Fitz anymore who the girl was.

As the entirely inappropriately cheerful outro played, Fitz found himself literally hitting his head on his keyboard, making windows jump and the computer to beep in protest as the keys mashed together. He wasn't sure what the headdesk was for: his own spectacular display of "open mouth, insert foot", or nagging doubts about just how justified Darcy was in his actions, or how he had totally failed in the attempt to improve Lizzie's opinion of Darcy – likely he just managed the complete opposite.

God, he had a lot of explaining to do to Darcy. If Fitz wasn't so convinced that Darcy was totally in love with Lizzie Bennet (Darcy wasn't nearly as subtle as he seemed to think he was), he wouldn't even think about mentioning it. But it was clear that he just managed to screw things royally up for his friend; it was only right that he should just tell Darcy what happened so that damage control could be taken. He only hoped he hadn't burned all bridges for Darcy.

He had clicked on the video from the playlist, so the next video started to play, and there was Charlotte Lu and then Collins came in and prattled about something – Fitz wasn't really listening. He was thinking about how he should tell Darcy, preferably without telling him about the videos because Lizzie was starting to rant angrily about him now. The girl was scary when she got angry. She was probably right, he would fear for Darcy's life if he ever stumbled across Lizzie any time this century…

…And of course, Darcy had to choose that moment to walk into the room. Could this become more of a drama? Fitz let out something like a horrified "ARGGGH!" the moment he caught sight of Darcy's torso that drowned out Lizzie's stiff acknowledgement of her unwelcome visitor.

The videos ended there.

The next thing Fitz knew, he was out of his chair and – there was no other word for it – flailing around his office. He had no idea what the hell Darcy was doing there, but the staff Halloween party was yesterday, Sunday. It was clear whatever happened had happened already. He hadn't heard from Darcy today. Whatever happened couldn't have been good. Gargh! It was too much to hope that Lizzie just held in her anger and they had their usual stiff conversation.

Come to think of it, he hadn't heard from Darcy at all today, and he did say he needed feedback on the report today, and Fitz had put it off to the last moment. Darcy usually was unnervingly punctual about work. The fact that he hasn't phoned or even texted must meant he was distracted…

Fitz stared at the phone on his desk. Well, this mess was partly his fault, he'll have to try to clean it up. Best check on Darcy first, just to make sure Lizzie didn't really kill him.

Taking a deep breath, Fitz scrolled through his address book and dialled Darcy's number. He listened to the phone ring…and ring…and ring…and then went to voicemail.

"Hey, Darcy, dude, you all right? Call me, please, I have to talk to you about something. It's urgent!"

Fitz hung up and wondered whether he should even call Lizzie. She would probably tell him what happened after the video ended, but she would also probably want to rant about Darcy and what Darcy did and whatever happened. The thing was Fitz only knew about Bing Lee and Jane Bennet through whatever Darcy told him. Lizzie obviously thought Darcy had done her sister wrong, and he couldn't defend him to Lizzie now without blowing up their friendship as well, but he couldn't condemn Darcy either, because he wasn't even sure that Darcy was wrong.

Then again…Lizzie's vlogs went back months and months. Maybe she'd mentioned Bing Lee and her sister somewhere? Actually, yes, there were a couple of videos with Bing on the thumbnail.

Fitz was about to click on them when his phone rang. Darcy! He grabbed the phone and nearly dropped it.

"Darcy!"

"Sorry, I was…distracted before. What is it?"

"I just called to – Is that Lizzie's video outro playing in the background?"

God, he knew about the videos? Whatever happened between them lead to Darcy knowing about the videos? Lizzie herself said she said "not-so-nice" things about Darcy in her videos and wouldn't let even Fitz watch them, and considering the last video, "not-so-nice" was Lizzie-talk for "insults".

For a moment, there were muffled sounds when Darcy obviously stopped the video, and when he came back on the line, he sounded a bit flustered.

"How do you you…know...about her videos?"

"How do you know about her videos? How many have you watched?"

Fitz was planning to tell Darcy that he spilled the beans to Lizzie anyway, but having Darcy find out about it through the vlog was not a good idea.

"She told me about them," Darcy said shortly.

What the hell?

"Though…I don't think she meant to," he continued.

"What video are you on?" Fitz asked with worry.

"I'm about to start 58. What did you want to talk to me about?" His voice was impatient now.

"Oh dear lord. Listen, Darcy, what you will see in this video, I'm so, so, sorry, I didn't know what damage it would cause."

"What?"

"But why didn't you tell me the girl you told Bing Lee to stay away from was Lizzie's sister? What the hell? Apparently, she was pretty upset about it too – the sister, not Lizzie, though Lizzie is upset too, for her sister. Anyway, I might as well just tell you, in the video you're about to watch, I kind of told Lizzie you broke up her sister and Bing Lee."

There was a long, tense silence on the other end. If it wasn't for the soft sounds of breathing, Fitz would have thought Darcy had hung up.

"Darcy? Darcy? I'm sorry, dude, I really – "

"So that's how she knew," Darcy said, softly, and Fitz wondered whether he was talking more to himself.

"Darcy?" Fitz prompted when another long silence ensued.

"I'll call you back."

Then, Darcy hung up abruptly. Fitz stared at the phone in his hand for a long while, wondering whether Darcy hung up because he really was upset at Fitz, or he just wanted to finish watching the videos. And he still didn't know what happened between Darcy and Lizzie yesterday.

Sighing, Fitz found himself clicking on a video with Bing Lee and Jane in the thumbnail, and feeling even more confused when the video ended.

What was Darcy talking about? Jane Bennet was obviously smitten with Bing. Even through the filter of the camera it was clear. In fact, her slight moments of awkwardness suggested she wasn't comfortable with the camera and yet her giddiness from being with Bing Lee permeated throughout the whole video.

God, no wonder Lizzie was so mad. If this is how Jane Bennet and Bing Lee were together, Fitz would even say Lizzie was justified in her anger and Darcy had just blundered things up himself; Fitz had only put on the finishing touches.

He clicked through a few more random videos, some of them about trivial things, but some of them also mentioned Bing Lee. Well, Fitz now had Lizzie's word that Jane Bennet apparently really likes Bing Lee, and he supposed she was in a better position to judge than Darcy. And then there was George Wickham. Never had Fitz appreciated the concept of "it's a small world" more than then. Small, indeed. And it was clear that some of Lizzie's unflattering opinions of Darcy was because of George himself.

Darcy did eventually call Fitz back.

"Hello?" Fitz said hesitantly, not sure what kind of mood Darcy would be in.

"Fitz."

There was awkward silence. But it was Darcy; awkward silences weren't exactly rare. Fitz waited for him to speak.

"Look, I'm not angry at you," Darcy finally said.

"You're not?"

"You didn't know. And…well, I might have been wrong about Jane Bennet."

"Might have? You've watched all the videos, right? The one with the two of them, the one where she burst into tears on camera - "

"Yes, on camera is the thing. I don't know anymore, but that's not the point. I'll think about what to do about Bing and Jane Bennet later."

Then Darcy proceeded to tell Fitz exactly what happened between him and Lizzie Bennet after the end of her last video.

"Timing, buddy, timing," Fitz moaned when he learned that Darcy walked in on Lizzie in a steaming temper to confess his undying love.

"How was I to know?" he retorted stiffly.

When the story was over, Fitz had to take a moment before he could say something comforting, because his first instinct was to berate Darcy. If he really said what he told Fitz he said to Lizzie (and Darcy had an unnerving ability to quote conversations verbatim, he was like Lizzie in that aspect, so Fitz wasn't hard pressed to believe he did say all those horrible things), then Fitz couldn't really blame Lizzie for the rejection. But Darcy didn't need to hear that now.

"You know what you have to do, right?" Fitz asked after a while.

"Submit the report to Catherine ASAP and go away and move on?"

Fitz rolled his eyes. "No. You did watch all her videos, right? Even the ones with George Wickham?"

"Yes."

"You have to tell her what really went on with George. I would, but it would mean more coming from you."

"What for?"

"Look, dude, I'm not saying some of the things she thinks about you aren't justified, but the George Wickham parts of it are total BS. So set her straight on that. She probably won't see him again, but at least if she ever does, she would not be fooled by him again."

There was a silence, as it was clear that Darcy was thinking about it.

"And then there's Bing Lee and Jane Bennet," Fitz continued, when it was clear that there had been enough time for his friend to ponder the issue of George Wickham. "Apparently Jane Bennet is in L.A. right? Does he know?"

"No."

"Well, just tell him. I get that you want to protect him, but really he's a big boy, maybe you should just let him work his love life out for himself."

"I've already thought about that," Darcy replied with a sigh. "But I might have to see them together again, in person, not on camera, just to be sure. But if I am mistaken, yes, I will have to tell him."

The good thing about Darcy, Fitz mused, was that even though he claimed his good opinion once lost, was lost forever, but when he was wrong, he was capable of admitting that he was wrong. That had to count for something, right? He just hoped Lizzie could see it. Though Fitz hoped that Darcy would tell Bing anyway. Bing should be able to work out for himself whether the girl liked him or not, and not rely on Darcy to do it for him. Considering Darcy's apparent misjudgement of Lizzie's feelings for him, Fitz wasn't sure he was the best judge. But he didn't say that just yet to Darcy. Unlike Darcy, Fitz knew to choose timing.

"I think if you do that, you might even get Lizzie to think a bit better of you," he said instead.

"I hardly think that's the point," Darcy said, a little irritated. "I would do it because it's the right thing, not in an attempt to make her like me."

"I'm not saying that's your motive, I'm just saying that might be the result."

"I can't think about it like that," Darcy said.

Fitz sighed. Darcy was in one of those moods when he'd trapped himself in a state and would stubbornly hold on to it wouldn't be persuaded that things could be different. But perhaps that would be best. At least then his hopes wouldn't be dashed again.

"So you are going to see Lizzie again, right? To tell her about George Wickham?"

"Yes, you are right, I should tell her about that, at least. He'd lied to too many good people already, she can't keep believing his lies as well."

"Let me know how it goes. But then I have a feeling I'll be able to watch it on Youtube. Unless you are thinking of asking her to not put it up."

"No, it's her life, she can vlog whatever she wants. She'd already filmed yesterday anyway."

"I wonder if she'd put that up too. Would you still see her if she does?"

"Why not? My motive would not have changed?"

"You know what, Darcy? I might think Lizzie has some justification for turning you down, but in the end she's still losing out if you still want to see her again regardless of whether or not she broadcasts her rejection of you to the entire internet. Have you seen those view counts of hers?"

"As I said, it's her life, she can vlog whatever she wants. I don't stand for censorship of the internet anyway."

"It's your life too. But either way, good luck. I think you'll need it."

With that, Fitz disconnected the call. Then, before returning to his work, he hit the subscribe button on Lizzie's channel.