And here's the second chapter! *sigh* It might not be what Batman would actually do, but only the Dark Knight himself could come up with the actual punishment deemed worthy. So I had to give them my idea. Plus, it seemed funny.

Disclaimer: Just like last chapter, I do not own these characters.

Clark groaned, slowly opening his eyes.

"Um… where am I?" He glanced around.

He was strapped tightly to a flag pole that had to be at least three storeys in the air.

He glanced down at himself. He was wearing… what looked to be like Conner's clothes in his size. Jeans and a black t-shirt with the red S-Shield on it. His glasses were missing and his hair was in its traditional spitcurl. The bars holding him prisoner seemed like lead.

"Mmm…"

Clark glanced around. He managed to see a flash of blonde hair and a bright red t-shirt. Barry?

"Wake up."

"Huh?" Barry's eyes opened.

He jolted. "Yah!"

"Yep."

"We're above ground. Why are we above ground?"

"You're afraid of heights?"

"Only if I'm strapped to a pole with Superman on the other side – wait, what are you doing here?"

"Same thing as you, I'd imagine." Clark rolled his eyes. "Calm down, Barry."

"And what if we fall?"

"Um… how do I say this without sounding clichéd and how people always expect me to sound? I'm Superman. Not gonna fall."

"Oh. Right." Barry calmed down. "Can you get us out of here?"

"Sure." Clark calmly reached for the lead wrapped around his chest. He bent it.

A wave of nausea swept through him.

"Ohhh…" He groaned.

"Clark? You okay?"

Clark gritted his teeth.

Kryptonite. Why is it always Kryptonite?

…Because otherwise it would be way too easy, I suppose.

With a groan, he moved the lead slightly, back to its original position.

The nausea stopped.

"Well, minor issue." Clark groaned.

"Kryptonite?"

"Yep." Clark sighed. "I'm going with these lead pipes are hollow. If I bend one even slightly, a crack will appear and the Kryptonite will come out."

"At which point, since I can't fly either, both of us will crash to the ground."

"Yep."

"Goodie. What happened here?"

"Well…" Clark said slowly. "If I'm right, this is good news bad news."

"Let's start with the good news."

"Good news is, we managed to get Bruce to do a prank."

"And the bad news is, we managed to get Batman do a prank." Barry agreed, looking down at the ground. He was wearing a Flash t-shirt, jeans and his mask.

"In hindsight, we should have known this was going to backfire." The Kryptonian muttered.

"We should've." Barry agreed. "So, are we in Central or Metropolis?"

"No idea."

"Is Bruce overreacting?"

"Maybe a little." Clark shrugged.

"I mean, all we did was paint the bat-suit pink… and the Bat-mobile purple… and redecorated the Bat-Cave yellow… and we're getting off easy, aren't we?" Barry realised.

"Either that or this is only part one." Clark muttered.

A car caught Clark's attention before he answered. "Someone's coming." He said slowly as the car stopped.

A black haired teenage girl got out, looking up at the two trapped heroes on a flag pole.

"Superman?" Lois Lane asked in shock.

Clark hung his head. "Part two. Right on cue."

X

"Who is it?" Flash asked.

Oh, right. Clark forgot the speedster couldn't see what he could, what with super-senses, different directions and the fact Clark found it a lot easier to recognise her.

"Lois." He muttered, reassured in the fact that the reporter couldn't hear him unless he called.

"Lane?"

"Yep."

"Wait, not only have you got your girlfriend here, she's a journalist?" Barry groaned.

"As opposed to Iris?" Clark hissed. "And she is not my girlfriend."

"I'm not saying that being a journalist is bad. It's just that I don't want anyone connected to the media in any way at all here." Barry hissed back, struggling against the bonds.

He could vibrate through… but then he'd fall on his face. And fractured bones were far from appealing.

"Hello?" Lois called out. Her voice carried up, easily distinguishable even by human ears.

Clark's head hung.

"Do we have to call back?" Barry groaned.

"The alternative is to stay here." Clark sighed.

"Until Bruce comes to get us. How long would that be?"

Clark would have given him a look if he could see the boy tied to the other side.

"Forever, right?"

"Pretty much." Clark groaned. "Lois?" He called out.

"Superman?"

"Yeah." Clark admitted, his voice travelling. "And yes, it is Flash up here with me."

"But… what?"

"Long story." Superman groaned. That was an understatement. "Can you get us down?"

"Can't you?"

"Let's just say the person who pulled off this particular trap is well known for thinking of everything." Barry said, vibrating from restlessness.

Lois walked around the pole, looking up at the trapped heroes.

"What do you want me to do?" The teenage reporter called. "Call the Fire Department?"

"No." They both blurted at the same time.

Well, at least they knew why Bruce made sure they were recognisable as heroes. To maximise embarrassment.

After all, Clark Kent and Barry Allen getting rescued by the fire department? Only the Justice League and a few others here and there knew why that would be so embarrassing. Superman and Flash getting rescued might become a national story. International, even.

Then again, they had painted the Bat Cave yellow.

"Well, what do you want me to do? I can't climb up…" Lois said. Her voice trailed off as an idea seemed to form. "Can I?"

"Lois, if you fall, I won't be able to catch you." Clark groaned. "And based on past experience, you would fall."

Lois sent him a glare that might have scared someone who didn't hang out with Batman.

"Well, what do you want me to do? Steal a cherry picker?" She paused thoughtfully.

Clark would have face-palmed if his arms were strapped to a pole with lead and kryptonite. "No stealing."

"You're not leaving me with a whole lot of options, you know." Lois said. "Who did you tick off? Doesn't seem like Lex Luthor's style…"

"They ticked off Batman." The nine year old boy piped up.

Lois, Clark and Barry looked around to see a nine year old red-head, dressed in yellow.

"Part three, here we are." Clark sighed.

"Oh, hi." Lois said, adjusting quickly. "Flash Kid, right?"

"Kid Flash!" Kid Flash pouted.

"Okay, kid." Lois said with a grin. "Whatcha doing here?"

"Good question." Barry muttered.

"Robin told me about this." Kid Flash grinned. "Superboy's coming."

A black dot jumped above the sky-line, right on cue. Conner landed nearby, crashing down behind them. He walked in, grinning.

"What?" Barry groaned. "Is the whole team coming? How about the League?"

"Nup." Superboy shook his head, trying hard to keep the smile away from his face. "Just us."

Sure, he loved his older brother – genetic donor, whatever – and didn't want to risk Superman to stop talking to him again. But the fact remained that this was really funny.

"Do you know how to get them down?" Lois asked.

The ten year old Kryptonian (okay… a little under a year old) shook his head. "Robin said that there's Kryptonite, so if I break the bonds both me and Superman would fall… and Flash too. And Kid Flash can't run up and break them out because… well, he can't."

"Wait, you said that they ticked off Batman." Lois shook her head. "How? Why?"

"They painted the Bat-Cave yellow." Kid Flash added. "And turned the Bat-Mobile pink and made his suit purple."

"Other way around." Barry corrected, dangling his feet from high above. "We made the Bat-Mobile purple."

"Whatever." Wally shrugged up at his cousin, grinning impishly. "Either was really stupid."

"We know." Barry groaned.

"Do you want us to call the Fire Department or the League?" Conner asked.

Neither option was particularly appealing… but less people would find out if it was the League rather than firemen. Besides, being rescued by the JLA was hardly humiliating for a member.

"League. Please." Clark groaned.

"Okay." Conner switched on a comm. unit. "Superboy to Watchtower. Superman and Flash have – Oh. Okay. Um, sure thing, Batman." He hung up and gave a sheepish smile. "Batman says not to call the League."

"And since when do you always follow his orders?" Flash yelped. "Come on, how many times has the team hacked into League systems this month?"

"We follow Batman's orders when we know what he does if you don't." Wally grinned.

Well… they had a point there.

"So, do we call the Fire Department yet?" Lois asked with a grin.

"Do you have to?" Barry knew he was whining, and he knew that was not acceptable behaviour for a seventeen year old, nor was it acceptable for a super-hero, but – well, being caught up here wasn't either.

"Well, we can wait until the next super villain decides to attack either Metropolis or Central and then call the Fire Department." Wally gave him a look. "Oh, but I'm sure that we could handle whoever it is."

Both Clark and Barry hung their heads in unison. "Okay." Barry muttered. "Call them."

Conner was the only one who heard them. Still, he was perfectly capable of picking up a phone and dialling emergency services.

"Part Four… here we come." The Scarlet Speedster groaned.

X

Two firemen got out of the truck.

"Alright. Now what do we have here…" The female one began. "Wait. You're Superboy and Flashboy."

"Kid Flash!"

"Okay." The fireman shook his head. "What are you doing in Metropolis?"

Wally just grinned.

The firewoman walked around. "Didn't call Superman?"

"I doubt it would have made much of a difference." Lois said with a smirk.

"Why?" The fireman blinked. "Aren't you the girl always falling out of everything for Superman to catch you?"

Lois growled and gave him a glare that made him take a few steps back.

"So Superman can't get them down?" The firewoman asked, deciding to change the subject.

"No, Superman cannot get them down, because Superman is currently tied up with kryptonite on a giant flag pole." Clark snapped.

Down below, the two adult's eyes widened.

"Flash is annoyed that Superman is speaking in third person."

"Shut up."

"Wait, are they saying that…" The firewoman began.

"They ticked off Batman. A lot." Conner explained with a shrug.

"Okay." The woman looked at the man. "You want to take the ladder or the controls?"

"Ladder."

"Fanboy." The woman coughed into her hand as her partner crawled up the ladder. With a sigh, the brunette began to press the controls, moving the ladder up to the top of the flag pole.

When he reached the top, the fireman found that the two teenagers – well, if they weren't Flash and Superman, they looked pretty darn close.

They also looked absolutely humiliated.

The fireman came up halfway in between the two heroes tied back to back. "So, Batman did this?" He asked.

"Yep." Superman sighed, dejected.

"…Why?"

"Because they're idiots." Wally called up.

"Hey!" Barry protested.

"In what way, shape or form is painting the Bat-Mobile pink smart?"

The fireman stared at them. "You painted the Bat-Mobile pink?"

"Technically, we painted it purple." Barry admitted, flushing. "The Bat-Suit was pink."

"…Again, why?"

Both flushed.

"They're idiots. I just said that." The nine year old speedster pointed out from the ground.

"That's probably the best explanation." Flash groaned. "Can you get us down? Please?"

"Um… sure." The fireman frowned, looking at the bonds. "What's it made of?"

"Lead with Kryptonite inside." Superman admitted.

"…Batman has this much Kryptonite?"

"Well, there's a green glowing rock inside this that makes me feel very sick when I bend the lead." Superman gave him a look. "I'm going with yes, it's Kryptonite."

"Okay." The fireman said with a reassuring smile. Superman wasn't the first teen he'd met who'd been a little irritated with the situation he found himself in – although the situation itself was unexpected. "I'll get the bolt cutters, shall I?" He suggested.

"No, Supey can break the bonds. He'll just fall if he does."

Superman gave Flash as much as a glower as he could, considering they were strapped back-to-back on a pole.

"Oh. Um… can you, then?" The fireman paused. "It's just, using the bolt cutters aren't going to make the kryptonite not there… are they?"

Superman sighed. "No." He admitted, tensing. "I'll break them on three, then."

"Okay. One. Two. Three."

The pipes shattered, revealing just a hint of green.

Clark moaned, dropping. The fireman's hand shot out, catching him by the black t-shirt with one hand and grabbing Barry's arm with the other.

Down below, Conner turned pale, collapsing against Wally. The nine-year old struggled under his friend's weight but kept him steady.

Up above, Flash grinned at the fireman. "Thanks." He commented lightly, taking Superman by the arm. In a split second the two of them had shot down the ladder, leaving the fireman standing up there, bemused.

They didn't stop, just vanished in a blur of red and black. After a moment Lois managed to pick out a flying teenager in the air.

"They're not coming back, are they?" The firewoman asked.

"Nup." Wally agreed. "Thanks for your help." He flashed them a winning smile.

"Um… it's our job." The fireman said modestly. "We'd better go."

"Okay." Lois agreed as the two got into the fire-truck and left.

She glanced at Kid Flash, still struggling to support Superboy. "You need a lift? At least until we get out of range of the Kryptonite?" She jerked a thumb at her car.

"Be nice." Kid Flash said.

The dark haired girl grinned, grabbing Superman's clone by the arm. The seventeen year old girl carried the ten/one year/s old Kryptonian into the car, Kid Flash darting into the front seat.

"Shotgun!"

"Cute." Lois smirked, getting into the car. "So, gonna tell me what you were doing here in the first place?" She asked as she shifted the gears, driving off.

"Robin told us to." Wally said, Conner beginning to stir. "He said that we wouldn't regret it."

"Kay." Lois drove out of the forest.

"What about you?"

"I got an 'anonymous tip' – um, you know what that means?"

"I'm not stupid. Duh."

"Course you're not. Keep forgetting you're a junior hero." Lois smirked slightly. "Anyway, someone called me and told me there was a story there."

"And you automatically go off just because some stranger called you? No wonder Superman's always having to rescue you."

"Hey!" Lois gave the kid a playful smile.

"Kidding." Kid Flash grinned at her sunnily. "So, you're an… intern, thingie, right?"

"Right. I'm interning at the Daily Planet… and I also run the school newspaper."

"Cool."

"So, you kids going to tell the entire Justice League about what just happened?" Lois asked.

"We're not." Superboy said with a slight smile. He jerked a thumb out the window. "They are."

Lois smirked when she saw a shadow of a cape vanish.

X

"And, for our next story," The journalist said as the Kent family watched the news while having dinner. "Flash and Superman were rescued earlier today by the fire-department."

Clark's jaw fell open as a video began to play. The sound was cut off on part where they were talking up there, but the conversations with those on the ground was perfectly legible.

"Clark?" John Kent looked at Clark. "Are you okay?"

Clark slowly nodded slowly, feeling a little pale. "Part five." He whispered under his breath.

John glanced at the TV. "Is this real?"

Clark reluctantly nodded.

"What were you doing that you needed to be rescued by the fire-department?" Martha asked blankly, watching as on TV the fireman climbed the ladder to the two struggling heroes.

"We ticked off Batman, all right?" Clark muttered, sliding down his chair.

"And he tied you on a pole?" Martha asked.

Clark nodded, turning red. "To be honest, we probably got away easy all things considered." He muttered.

"How did he-" John began.

"I don't know. And I've stopped asking. Bats can do pretty much anything he wants." Clark muttered. "You know once he managed to fly out a window?"

"Come again?" Martha blinked.

"He made a hang-glider that exploded out when he jumped through when he knew he'd need a quick escape on that one mission. It was destroyed, but chances are he's made another just in case he ever needs it again."

"Clark. You're avoiding the subject." John looked at his adoptive son.

"That I am. Can I keep avoiding the subject? Please?" Clark asked. "We wanted Bats to act his age for once, and didn't realise that a prank from the Batman would not be typical. Can I please not talk about it?"

His parents glanced at each other and then nodded at their alien son. "Sure." Martha agreed with a smile.

John nodded, turning back to his dinner. "But you're going to have to explain this to a lot of people, you know."

"…I know."

"And we're going to want an explanation eventually."

Sigh. "I know."

X

"Of course he had a camera there." Barry groaned, slumping his head.

"Why wouldn't he?" Wally grinned, appearing next to his cousin. "He's Batman."

"I am well aware of that fact, thank you very much." The blonde teenager winced.

"You weren't when you decided to paint the Bat-Cave. Or booby-trap his school bag. Or dump gloop on him when he was talking to Gordon."

"How did you-"

"Robin told me." Wally grinned. "You know you're getting off lightly."

"Probably." Barry sighed in exasperation.

"By now it's probably all around the League."

"Don't you have to go to the Cave for training or something?" Barry gave him a look.

Wally grinned. "Can't get rid of me that easily."

"Shut up." Barry muttered.

"Jay and Jane got copies emailed to them, too."

"Shut up."

"Oh, and Iris, too."

"What bit about 'shut up' don't you understand?" The blonde hero gave his cousin a glare.

"The entire team saw it. And we saw a clip of it in school."

"Shut – wait, What?"

"Mmm-hmm. It was really funny."

"Aren't you worried you'll get some of the splashback?" Barry glowered.

Wally smirked. "I'm in the video too, though. And I'm laughing at you."

"I hate you." Barry muttered, folding his arms.

"No you don't." Wally grinned, hugging his cousin.

"Fine. You're right, I don't." Barry said, ruffling Wally's red hair. "But you are an annoying brat, you know."

"Only when I want to be."

"True." Barry sighed with a fond grin. "And you want to be right now, don't you?"

"Yep!"

"How about this? If you stop being an annoying brat, we can go out for ice-cream."

"Okay!"

X

"Well, we managed to get the Bat-Cave back to normal." Robin stretched, putting away the tin of paint remover. "And the Bat-Mobile. And the Bat-Suit."

"Yeah."

"Pity, though. We really do need more colour around here."

Batman gave him a look. "You are not agreeing with them."

"Just a little." Robin put his fingers about a centimetre apart to emphasise how little it was.

"You already dress in red."

"And black. This place is really dark."

"It's supposed to be. I'm the Dark Knight, remember?" Batman said, a smile twitching his lips.

The seven year old grinned at him. "Yeah, but you did just pull off one of the most spectacular pranks ever."

"That wasn't a prank. That was retaliation…"

"In form of a prank." Robin grinned cheekily. "Admit it. They were trying to make you act like a kid, and you did it."

"It was retaliation."

"It was awesome." Robin grinned. "And admit it. You had fun, didn't you?"

Bruce couldn't lie to his brother. "Maybe a little."

"Mmm-hmm. So they managed to make you act like a teenager, and you embarrassed them totally. Everybody wins!"

Batman smirked. "Cute logic."

"But they're not going to be doing anything like that again, are they?"

"Somehow, I truly doubt it."

So… reviews, anyone?