A/n: Yes, of course, this was inspired by Taylor's "Speak Now" but also the Jonases' "Wedding Bells". If you're interested in seeing face claims for my OCs, I pictured Caroline as Lisa Sheldon and Gabriel as Gael García Bernal (Yes, I am aware he is not Italian, but yet this is who my ill-cultured mind imagined.)

Disclaimer: If I owned "Gilmore Girls" it would not have ended the way it did.

Speak Now

You are cordially invited to celebrate the matrimonial union of

Mr. Jess Lucas Mariano

and

Miss Caroline Lorraine Jenkins

On Saturday evening

October the sixth

at five o'clock

Thirty-five North Winchester

Avenue, Philadelphia, PN

followed by a reception

R.S.V.P. 215.555.0125

Not only does Rory not want to go, she really does not want to go. But Jess is her friend, after all, and she knows it will mean the world to him if she attends. And it's not like her absence could go unnoticed, what with her stepfather being the best man, and everything. So she mans up, puts on a pretty little lilac-colored number, and goes to the ceremony.

Her six-months-pregnant mother nearly attacks Rory when she sees her. Her emotions are pretty up and down these days. "There she is!" Lorelai bellows, loud enough for the entire chapel to hear. "My beautiful little loin-fruit! Come to remind her ill-fated, expectant mother of just how old she really is!"

Rory laughs. "Hey, mom," she says and squeezes her best friend back just as tightly.

"Your mom was worried you weren't gonna make it, kid," comes from her mom's husband.

"Oh, please!" Lorelai turns to him. "I'm not the one that was all, 'Where's Rory? Why isn't Rory here yet? Do you think she's coming? You should call her and see if she's still coming. Should I tell Jess she's not coming? Jess is gonna be so upset that she's not coming!'"

Luke's cheeks turn a shade and he rolls his eyes and shifts standing positions uncomfortably. "I don't think it went exactly like that," he says. "Your mother's exaggerating."

"Lorelai puts her hands on her hips dramatically. "Now, Rory. Have you ever, in all your years, known your mother to exaggerate?"

Rory just laughs again and gives Luke a hug. "It's good to see you guys."

And then little Will comes galloping down the aisle. "'Ory, 'Ory, 'Ory!" He's still having a bit of trouble with those 'R's.

"Hey, little man!" Rory kneels down and pulls her three-year-old brother into her arms.

"I missed you, 'Ory!" His smile is so big that his eyes are barely open, little half-moons of childish joy.

"Well, I missed you, too, Willy!" She hears Luke scoff from behind her. He hates when she calls his son that.

Will tugs on Rory's hair. "'Ory, Cousin Jess says to go see him when you get here."

Rory shoots a tentative look up at Luke.

Luke sighs and nods, answers her look with a tone that says he doesn't really want to answer it. "He's been asking for ya since we got here. He's in a room in the back."

Will points back up the aisle. "C'mon, 'Ory. I'll show you!"

This time, it's Lorelai who Rory shoots a look at.

Lorelai holds out her arms for her son. "No, baby. Daddy and me want you to stay right here with us. Let Rory have some alone time with Jess."

Will's tiny brows pull together in confusion. "Like when you and Daddy have alone time?"

Luke's eyes go wide and Lorelai giggles and Luke takes Rory by the arm and shows her to the back room. He raps his knuckles against the white-painted wood. "Jess, Rory's here." Then Rory watches Luke leave.

Before she can even get nervous, the door opens to show Jess Mariano as handsome as ever in his black tailored tuxedo but still wearing that stupid smirk on his face. "Well. Hey, there, stranger."

"Hey, you." She wants to hug him, but she doesn't feel that it's appropriate, so instead she just gives him a playful punch on the arm, but it turns out super awkward and she wishes she would've just gotten over herself and hugged him. He was hers before he was Caroline's, anyway.

Jess steps back from her, looks her up and down, whistles. "Damn, Gilmore. Lookin' good."

She laughs, grateful to him for breaking the tension with a joke. "And you look..." She pauses for a moment, searching for the right word to describe the boy that stands before her. And that's when she realizes she no longer sees him as a boy — the rebel without a cause, the angsty teenaged hoodlum — but as a man. "Older."

He smirks and opens the door wide and moves to the side, inviting Rory in. She doesn't want to go in. She knows better than to go down this path — it can only lead to bad things. But the alternative is to refuse the man she can never bring herself to refuse, so she goes in, anyway.

"So, how's it going over at The Times? I haven't talked to ya in a while."

Yeah, Rory'd finally done it. After all those years of studying and studying and studying and climbing up social ladders and up corporate food chains and interviewing and interviewing and interviewing... she'd finally done it. Landed her dream job as a journalist for The New York Times. And it's super hectic and doesn't leave room for much else, but she'd be lying if she said she didn't love every minute of it.

"It's really, really great. I love it just as much as I did back when I started."

He smiles at her. And not one of those smirks that Jess is known for, but a real, genuine Mariano smile. And she can't help but to smile back.

"Yeah? Well, I'm glad. That's good to hear."

"Well, what about you? How's the publishing thing going?"

Jess had continued on working in publishing, although he's not at Truncheon anymore. He's now working at a bigger company somewhere in downtown Philadelphia that's a little more known and a little more mainstream. She knows he misses the underground beatnik, if not small-town vibe of Truncheon, but she also knows that he doesn't miss the small-town pay.

"It's good; it's good. I kinda have to be a pushover since I'm still pretty low on the chain, but I get to read a lot of good stuff from a lot of unknowns. And that's the freshest stuff, yenno? The unknown authors who haven't yet been influenced by fame or fans or the media or their own vanity or the pressure to be better than they were before... That's the stuff worth reading."

She loves the sappy look on his face he always gets when he talks about his work. "And what about yourself? Any plans to write again yet?" The question she always asks.

He shrugs his shoulders, smirks. "I've been playing around with a few ideas, but none of them seem too promising at the moment."

Rory smiles wide. There is nothing she wants more for Jess than for him to be happy and to be doing his best work. And she knows that writing is just that for him. "You should do it. Write again, I mean. I thought you did so well the first time."

He scoffs, but there's playfulness behind it. "Yeah, well. You're the only one."

"I'm serious, Jess! You could be so great if you just sit down and try! I've gotten to be one hell of a proofreader... I could beta you!"

Jess smirks again and looks at her as if she is his childhood home after a long time away, a look that makes her stomach flip. "Same old Rory."

And then they're just standing across from each other and looking at each other. And it isn't awkward — it isn't awkward at all.

But Jess ruins it by clearing his throat after a few moments and lifting his hand to show Rory a black bowtie. "Hey, uh... would you by any chance know how to put on a bowtie?"

She grins. "Isn't your best man supposed to be in charge of this sorta thing?"

"Honestly, Rory. Do you actually think Luke has the slightest idea of how to put on anything other than a plaid flannel button-down and a backwards baseball cap?"

Rory laughs aloud at that one which no doubt prompts Jess to go on.

"And Chris is probably out there checking out the bridesmaids, or what he keeps referring to as the 'babe pool' that he plans on swimming in tonight. And Matthew is somewhere pretending to be in charge of this whole shindig even though he's really not... And Jimmy or T.J. would help except for the fact that I banned T.J. from coming near me around three hours ago, and I don't even know if Jimmy decided to show up at all."

Rory knows that, despite the way Jess speaks of his father so nonchalantly, it still hurts him. She tries to lighten the mood with a joke. "Looks like everyone just abandoned you in your most desperate time of need!"

He smirks and says, "Well, it's a good thing you're here, then."

Rory's stomach knots up and it feels worse than the flip.

She takes the tie from his hand and begins to tie it under the collar around his neck. The proximity is so close — too close — and she can feel the warmth of his breath on her forehead as she finishes up the tie. It reminds her of two years ago and almost makes her dizzy. She flattens the bowtie out and then Jess's hands are around her wrists, holding her palms to his chest. She looks up at him slowly, dangerously, and his gaze is warm and friendly and reminiscent and not at all cold-footed.

"I'm really glad you came, Ror."

"Yeah. Me, too."

They just look at each other again for a few moments.

But then Jess's eyes get wide and bright like a puppy whose owner has just returned home from work in the afternoon. "You're coming to the reception after, right?"

In truth, Rory hadn't been planning on staying for the reception. The ceremony would surely do her enough heartache for one day. Or a week. Or maybe a lifetime. But the way he's looking at her... she just can't say no.

"Good. I know Caroline will be just thrilled to see you."

Thrilled? Since when does Jess speak so... Rory thinks, but she can't find the right word. Since when does he use the world 'thrilled' in casual conversation? And so un-ironically? She doesn't know. She supposes she doesn't know much about Jess these days.

Then there's a familiar rap at the door and the two immediately jump away from each other as if they'd been doing something wrong. (It reminds Rory of all the times they'd been horizontal on the couch upstairs at Luke's and he'd come up pretending to be looking for something and they'd spring apart.)

Luke is, of course, the source of the rapping, just like the old days. He tells them that it's almost time and that Rory should go take a seat up front with her mom and that Jess should probably start making his way up to his spot at the altar.

Jess nods and takes a shaky breath and laughs aloud at himself nervously.

Since when does Jess Mariano get nervous?

"Well, how do I look?" he asks.

"Like you're about to get married," Rory says with a laugh even though she doesn't find it very funny.

He breathes a sigh of relief and laughs again, too. "Good. That's what I was going for."

Luke starts tapping his fingers against the door frame impatiently, so Jess looks at his old friend one last time. "See ya on the other side?"

"Yeah." She gives what she hopes to be a 'good luck' smile and not a sad one. "See ya."

Four years ago was when Luke and Lorelai had finally gotten married. It wasn't long after they'd reconciled — Lorelai'd said she wanted to get it done before Luke did something reckless like give her an ultimatum. Rory'd laughed at that. Luke hadn't.

The ceremony was small, held in the town square, the nuptials taking place at the foot of the gazebo. Lorelai wore white and Rory wore soft pink and they had flowers in their hair and everyone was there and everything was perfect.

And Jess had even driven in to be the best man.

It was the first time Rory had seen him since that awful night at Truncheon when she'd kissed him only to profess her love for Logan and run out on him. She figured he'd be sullen about it, hold a grudge and make her feel guilty. But he didn't.

Instead, he made her feel seventeen all over again, especially the night of the rehearsal dinner, the eve of the wedding, when they'd both had one too many drinks and she'd let him take her home with him, back up to the apartment above the diner where they'd spent many an hour back in the day.

And then she'd let him have her again the night of the wedding.

He'd asked her to come back with him to Philly. And she'd wanted to, she really had, but she'd had a few interviews lined up for the following month that she just couldn't miss. So, they made a compromise. She would live with him for a month, but then she'd go back to New York, and that would be that. They'd have their fun, get their fill of each other one last time, and then move on for good.

They'd spent most of that month at coffee shops, at book stores, at Truncheon, or in bed. And it was the most fun Rory'd had in so, so long. But time had come and gone too quickly, and it was back home before she knew it.

It turned out that she'd bombed both of her interviews because she was so hung up on her old high school boyfriend. Go figure.

So she'd packed her things, paid the final lease on her apartment, and had showed up at Jess's place without notice, standing with her suitcase in the rain. And he hadn't said anything. He'd just opened the door and let her in.

Jess got Rory an editing job at Truncheon, but she hated working with him — he was surprisingly nitpicky! — so she'd settled for a waitressing job at a diner while she put in applications at newspapers in the area. And she was happy. Most of the time.

The fights were terrible and often. They left Rory in tears and threatening to leave, and Jess would ask her where she was planning on going, and she would realize she didn't have anywhere else to go, and that would only make her cry harder. But then Jess would hold her and tell her he was sorry and that he loved her and to stay, please, stay. And she did. Because, despite everything, she loved him, too. Terribly.

But all the writing jobs fell through. And she loved being at home with Jess, but she hated waitressing. And so did her mom.

"You're better than that," Lorelai would say. "You have a college degree and you're wasting it."

"But I love him," Rory would reply.

But, sometimes, even that wasn't enough.

Jess understood to an extent. He loved his job, and he couldn't imagine waking up every day to go and spend hours doing something that he hated. She'd offered for him to come to New York, promised that he could get a wonderful publishing job in New York, but Truncheon was his home. So he told her he loved her. And that he had always loved her. And that he always would love her.

And then he let her go.

The decorations are pretty, pastel, poised, and not at all Jess-like. From what little Rory remembers of Caroline, she can confidently gather that Caroline is the pretty, pastel, and poised one of the two.

Jess's hair is all gelled back like he used to do it and he looks super uncomfortable in his tuxedo but also super in love whenever Caroline comes walking down the aisle like the high school homecoming queen. Which she had been, of course. Rory knows this because she'd Googled Caroline Jenkins as soon as Jess had written about her only ten short months ago. Maybe it had been a little stalker ex-girlfriendish of Rory, but she'd felt it her personal duty as the one who knows Jess better than anyone else in the world (except maybe now) to make sure that Caroline was good enough for him. And Rory's conclusion? She isn't. But, then again, no one is. Not even herself.

No, especially not herself.

As the couple takes each others' hands and takes their places at the altar, Lorelai squeezes Rory's hand herself. She must be able to sense how uncomfortable this is making her daughter, watching her ex-flame — vagabondish and unreliable Jess — finally settle down.

Rory begins to wonder when she'll settle down herself. The future she envisions is blurry, and she can't quite tell who the groom is, but she's sure it isn't Gabriel. This groom is shorter, and his hair isn't as long, but he is part Italian. And his smile is crooked. Or maybe that's a smirk she sees?

She shakes her head, ridding herself of the thought. Thinking this way will get her nowhere.

She doubts she'll ever settle down. Sure, she wants it, the whole nine yards! The house with the wrap-around porch, the kids, the golden retriever, the minivan. But maybe that life just isn't cut out for her. She loses faith in it more and more every day.

As the priest begins, Luke looks into the audience at Lorelai. Rory can see it in his face, that intense love he harbors for her mother, had harbored for so many years. So many years he'd spent pining for her — watching her stumble from guy to guy and getting engaged but not married and then married without being engaged and just standing by and watching and being the friend, always just the friend. Until Lorelai had gotten her head out of the clouds for one second and saw what was right in front of her, just like Luke is looking at what's right in front of him now.

And Rory sees the way her mother's looking back at Luke with a look that matches his own, even as little Will, who's serving as the ring bearer, is standing at Luke's feet and picking his nose.

And Rory wants it. She wants it all.

Rory and Jess had parted as friends. They'd agreed that while it was probably best not to see each other (because that only led to one place — the bedroom — and the bedroom complicated things) unless it was at holidays with the family back in Stars Hollow, they still wanted to keep in contact. They began e-mailing each other back and forth regularly, talking about work and books and Luke and Lorelai and how big little Will (who'd been conceived and born all while they'd been living together in Philadelphia) was getting and God knows what else. Until Jess met a girl.

Her name was Caroline, and she was a hopeful young writer with an appointment at Truncheon and a will to be published. Chris had flirted with her first, and then Matthew, and when she'd turned both of them down, they'd all but tried to bribe Jess into asking her out just to see if she'd actually say yes, or maybe give an explanation, such as she "already has a lover or is actually a lesbian."

It was all just a joke at first. And despite their misogynistic motives, Jess had agreed to ask Caroline out to appease his friends. And, in a time-tested Jess manner, he'd been witty and dark and mysterious and charming... and she'd said yes. But then they had actually sort of hit it off, despite her being the subject of a wager. But apparently she hadn't minded, because Jess's e-mails had started coming less and less frequently.

Rory had eventually met someone else. She'd done an interview alongside a guy for a position at The New York Times. His name was Gabriel, and he was Italian. They'd both interviewed for the job, and Rory had gotten it, but Gabriel was handsome and foreign, so after the interview she'd let him take her out for coffee when he'd asked. And, before she knew it, he was staying more nights at her place than he did at his own.

Gabriel was really sweet and intelligent and funny and interesting. And she really liked him. But sometimes he would keep crossword puzzles in the back pocket of his jeans, and Rory had to ask him to stop doing it. She claimed it was because she couldn't stand to see a book bent out of shape, which was partially true. But only she knew the real reason.

Her... and one other person.

When the holidays came, Lorelai had suggested that Rory bring Gabriel home with her since his family was back in Italy.

Rory had insisted that he couldn't because he had already made other plans with an uncle who lived in Ohio. And that was true, but even if he had been free she still didn't think she'd have invited him. And it had only taken a few moments of silence on the phone for Lorelai to guess the real reason for Rory's hesitation.

"Ror, that part of your life is over. You can't let Jess dictate your decisions anymore."

"That's not it, it's just... Things are already going to be uncomfortable between us. I don't wanna make it any worse."

"Mhmm. Or you wanna be seen to him as still available."

"Mom—"

"A lil' cousin flirtin' never hurt anybody! Heck, we can pretend we're down yonder in Weezyana. Make it all normal seemin'!"

"Your southern accent sucks."

"Bring Gabriel."

"He's got plans."

"Fine. Suit yourself."

And when Rory had showed up back home, she'd realized just why exactly Lorelai had been prompting her to bring a date.

Luke had closed up the diner and Lorelai had decorated it all Christmasy and they'd pushed all the tables up together to make one big long one for optimal dish space and massive amounts of elbow room. Or, Rory'd found out the hard way, it was because they were making room for one more person than usual. Jess was bringing home a plus one.

Caroline was actually really nice, so nice that it made Rory sick to her stomach. No one was that nice. And when Caroline laughed, it was like a tinkling of fairies' wings or something equally children's book. And that's what she was, Rory had learned. She wrote and illustrated children's books. How perfectly small-town and dainty. (Both things that Rory had used to pride herself in being.)

Her hair was long and wavy and just the right shade of auburn so that you'd know it was all natural and not from a box or a salon even, and her eyes were wide and green and her cheeks were rosy and freckle-sprinkled. And she was tall and thin and wore heels even though it made her a few inches taller than Jess when she stood next to him and clutched his arm with her perfectly manicured fingers. And Jess looked at her like she was the sun.

Rory'd cried herself to sleep that night, and back then, she couldn't, for the life of her, figure out why. So she'd blamed it on PMS and hugged Caroline goodbye the next morning and gave Jess a small smile but no hug and then went back to her apartment in New York and back to Gabriel and back to her life and drowned herself in coffee and immersed herself in her work to rid herself of the way Jess, who'd used to treat her like the center of his universe, had somehow managed to make her feel so small.

They're reciting their vows now, and Rory finds herself wishing that she'd opted to sit near the back so that she could've slipped out easily. She closes her eyes and squeezes her mother's hand and tries to forget where she is and whose wedding she's attending. But closing her eyes only proves to make matters worse, because as Rory listens to the faint wind chimes of Caroline's voice, she imagines that it is her own.

"To have and to hold..."

"To love and to cherish..."

"In sickness and in health..."

"'Til death do us part..."

Then the clearing of the priest's voice and, "You may now present each other with the rings."

There's a short rustling from the stage and laughter ensues from the audience. Rory assumes one of them is having difficulties fumbling to get the ring on the other's finger. The majority of the laughter comes from the groom's side, she thinks. Or maybe it just seems that way because that's where she's sitting. Or maybe the laughter isn't for Jess at all, but due to little Will being the clumsy little ring bearer that he is. She doesn't open her eyes to confirm or deny either of her guesses. It makes no difference either way.

There is silence, and then the age-old quote comes from the priest: "If there is anyone here today that has reason to object to this union, speak now or forever hold your peace."

A millisecond passes, and a collective gasp of shock makes its way through the crowd. Suddenly, Rory's heart is beating much too fast for her to conjure up the courage to open her eyes and see why... And not only why they're gasping, but also why her heart is pounding so... With deductive reasoning, she comes to the conclusion that she is nervous. Why is she nervous?

Rory idly realizes that Lorelai isn't holding her hand anymore when she feels a small tug on the skirt of her dress and hears a worried hiss escape from out of what sounds like her mother's clenched teeth, and Rory can't figure out why her mother would want her to open her eyes and witness the person that's objecting. What does it matter? Jess and Caroline are, in her mind, already married. And Rory doesn't want to watch.

She hears some light murmuring start across the crowd, but it crescendos as the seconds tick by. Why isn't the priest going on? Why isn't he pronouncing them man and wife? Rory feels a bead of cold sweat trickle down the back of her neck and squeezes her eyes shut tighter.

"Rory...?" comes a soft but confused voice from the distance before her, years away, lifetimes away, worlds away. A voice she recognizes. But why... Why is he saying her name?

In answer to the voice, she sucks in a shaky breath and her heart picks up its pace and Rory hesitantly opens her eyes to see the red hot face of the bride, and, next to her, the sickly pale face of the groom, both staring at her with incredulous eyes.

And that's when she looks down at her feet and realizes she's standing.