/ / / Reactions \ \ \

Steve woke up with a start and shivered. He pulled the covers up and froze when it came without meeting any resistance. He turned over to find the other side of the bed empty. Steve threw off the covers and grabbed one of Danny's jumpers pulling it on over his head as he walked out of the bedroom looking for Danny. He didn't find the other man in the bathroom or Grace's room, he wasn't in the spare room or asleep on the couch. Steve checked the study and the kitchen, the downstairs bathroom and then he went out and checked that Danny's car was still in the driveway. Steve double checked every room in the house but still couldn't find Danny but he did discover the back door was unlocked.

Steve opened the door and the cold wind off the ocean hit him in the face. "Danny?"

"Yeah, I'm here."

Steve walked out onto the lanai to find Danny sitting in the corner of one of the chairs there. "What are you doing out here?"

"I couldn't sleep."

Steve looked at Danny's bare arms and the goosebumps all over his pale flesh. He pulled the jumper off his head and handed it to Danny.

"What?"

"You look cold."

Danny looked up at Steve disbelievingly. "And suddenly you're not going to be cold?"

"I'll go and get another jumper," Steve offered.

"I beat a man bloody today." Danny said, holding the jumper in his hands.

"I know, he deserved it."

"I'm a police officer, Steve. That means it doesn't matter if someone deserves it. It's my job to make sure he doesn't get it."

Steve sat down next to Danny and rested one hand on the other man's knee. "He was not going to give us the information we needed to find Ella."

"He was willing to use her for leverage," Danny pointed out. "We could have made a deal."

"He didn't deserve a deal."

"They never deserve a deal," Danny grumbled, hunching farther down into himself and the chair. "But that's just part of being a cop. You have to deal with the fact that scum like Beckett make deals."

"Five-0 was created to get around those deals. We were given means to make sure we caught these people."

"Means isn't the same as licence to beat people for information. It doesn't work, Steve, there's a reason that torture isn't acceptable in Western society."

"You didn't torture him, I've been tortured, you just punched him a bit," Steve said, shaking his head.

Danny twisted around suddenly and looked at Steve. "What?"

"It's not important."

"Yes, it is."

"No," Steve said firmly. "It's not. I'm healed, it was years ago and you're more important right now."

Danny looked unconvinced but he turned back around and looked out into the darkness.

"Talk to me, babe."

Danny's mouth didn't even quirk so Steve knew it was bad. He shuffled over on the seat until he was sitting with his entire side pressed into Danny. He started when he realised how cold Danny's skin was. He reached over and grabbed the jumper and tugged it over Danny's head.

"What are you doing?" Danny asked, fighting Steve as he grabbed the other man's hands and pressed them into the arm holes.

"You're freezing, put this one."

"I will if you'll let me do it, Jesus, Steve, I can dress myself."

"Your lack of a jumper tells me you can't."

Danny pulled the jumper on and slumped back into the chair. "Happy?"

"No, not until you come back to bed feeling better."

"What I did today it's unacceptable, Steve, I should be written up on a police brutality charge and you should be the one writing me up."

"No, I shouldn't."

"Yes, you should," Danny said, turning around and looking at him. "There are things cops can and cannot do. Beating a suspect was something they did in the seventies and it wasn't effective then. They have proven it's not effective. People will say anything when they want someone to stop beating them. Beckett could have said anything; he could have lied, he could have told us somewhere that Ella wasn't and she could have died. Then I would have broken the law, beaten him, for nothing. You do understand what I did was wrong, you have to, Steve. You took my badge. I let you take my badge. You took my badge because it's never okay to beat someone for information."

"I took your badge because I didn't know what else to do and I knew we needed to do something to get him to talk."

Danny shook his head. "Tell me the truth, Steve."

"We saved Ella; that means everything we did was worth it."

"That's not how you really feel. I know you, Steve."

Steve sighed. "I used to be a SEAL, Danny. Beating a guy to find out where a little girl was being held is what I was trained for. I don't see a problem with it. He'll heal, we got Ella back safe, and the Becketts are going to jail for what they've done-"

"Unless it gets thrown out of court because I beat him for the information on where Ella was."

"He's going to be charged with the kidnapping and unlawful imprisonment of Amanda Morris as well."

Danny nodded.

"Being a SEAL meant getting results and often in ways that would make some people uneasy."

"I remember the shark tank and the suspect being dangled off a building. But you don't do that stuff anymore, babe."

"Because you bitched me out every time I did. So I amended my behaviour. Regardless of what you claim, I can do that."

"I never doubted you, Steve."

"Yes, you did."

"Okay, at the beginning I did. But not anymore."

"The thing is, Danny, if I needed to go back out there I would. I did when I was in Korea recently."

"I don't know how to do that and sleep at night."

Steve threw an arm over Danny's shoulders and pressed a kiss to his head. "I'm glad."

Danny shook his head. "You're not supposed to be glad about this."

"I know you would do whatever you had to do to protect people, Danny. And today you had to cross a line that you haven't crossed before to save a little girl."

"That's just it, Steve. I didn't have to cross that line. I didn't have to give you my badge, and I didn't have to beat Beckett until I broke his nose. I wanted to do that. I wanted to make him hurt and make him bleed for what he did to those girls. That's the part that scares me."

Steve tightened his arm and sat back, not sure what to say to make this better. They sat in silence for a long time before Danny spoke again.

"If I can't work a case with a missing little girl without losing my impartiality then I shouldn't be a cop anymore."

"You love being a cop."

"It's what I always wanted to do, it's what I'm good at but the first rule is that you aren't allowed to make things personal."

"Would you feel better if you had have called in the lawyers and they had have made a deal?"

"No, but they are still going to have to make a deal now."

"Danny, immunity and means covers all of us, not just me."

"Steve, I'm a cop. He deserved to be treated with…okay, fine, fine, Steven, he was scum and I hope that when he gets thrown in jail the other inmates find out he kidnapped two little girls. Does that make you happy? To know that I'm glad I made him hurt? This isn't okay, this is never okay."

"You are a cop, a cop on the special Five-0 taskforce."

Danny shook his head and pulled away from Steve. He stood up and started moving, pacing back and forth in front of Steve.

"Danny? Danny, what do you need me to do?"

"I need you to admit that I crossed a line and I need you to stop telling me that it was okay."

"Okay."

"What?"

"Okay, it wasn't okay."

"I also want you to take this seriously."

Steve stood up and got into Danny's personal space. "You think I don't take this seriously? You're out here stressing out over it. I've been taking this seriously since I had to kick you out of the interrogation room. Nothing you did today was you, Danny. You don't physically assault suspects and you don't shut me out but you did. Ever since you did it you've shut me out and I haven't known what to do and you wouldn't talk so you had best understand that I take this completely seriously."

Danny reached out and wrapped his hand around Steve's wrist. "I…"

"It's okay."

"It scares me that I was able to cross that line. Anger has always been a problem of mine. I can't be a good cop, I can't be on this task force, if I don't know how to restrain myself."

"What do you want me to do?" Steve asked, standing up and grabbing onto Danny's arms to stop him.

"I don't know. I let the idea of immunity and means get to me. It's not acceptable; it's temptation to break the law. I would have never done that if I didn't know I had something like your deal with the Governor behind me."

"You still would have wanted to."

"But, I never would have. I wouldn't have punched him."

"If we didn't have Five-0 we wouldn't have found her."

Danny shook his head and pulled back from Steve. "Police were finding missing people before you came back to Hawaii, in fact the HPD has a pretty decent track record."

Steve rolled his eyes. "You're defending the HPD?"

"I don't have anything against the HPD, even if they treated me like crap when I first came to the island. Or that they have grumbled their way through assisting us on half our cases. Except for Duke, Duke is always helpful and nice. But HPD is more than just the police that are annoyed about a special task force being given the ability to take their cases, being given special rules, and the rookie, allegedly dirty cop, haole, and SEAL who have taken it over. But that's all been getting better over time, Steven, and at least the HPD don't do what I did."

Steve rubbed at his forehead. "You…what do we need to do?"

"I just need time."

"Can you have time in bed, where it's warm?"

"I can't sleep."

"We'll talk, we can watch TV, we can do anything but sit out here and stew silently."

Danny sighed heavily. "I'm thinking about going and seeing the department psych."

Steve thought about what his old SEALs teammates would have said and what he might have said back then and shook the thought away since all he really wanted was for Danny to be okay. "Are they good enough?"

"They're a department shrink – they're fine."

Steve ran his hands down Danny's arms and twisted his fingers with the blonde's to pull him toward the house. "We can find someone better…if you want."

"I don't think I'm going to need to go that much. You're right…partially, just partially mind you, and I did manage to save Ella but I also overstepped so I need to deal with the other stuff, the other side to why I did what I did. I think the department psych will be enough for that."

Steve nodded. "If you're sure."

"I am," Danny said, firmly.

"Then you'll come inside?"

"I'm not convinced about this, Steven."

"I know," Steve took a deep breath and tried to work out what to say. "So…tomorrow you'll call the departmental psych and talk to them. And I will promise not to stand by while you make a decision that you're going to regret later."

"You knew I'd regret it?"

"Of course I did, I know you. I just don't think it was wrong."

"At the time it felt like the right thing to do, the only thing to do."

Steve bit down on what he wanted to say because even if he believed that the ends justified the means he knew Danny too well to think that arguing would get the other man inside and warm faster.

"Steve? You know that this has nothing to do with you, right?"

Steve shrugged. "We've always had different measurements for this type of thing. You accept me and I accept you, and your loud complaining in the passenger seat, and we work."

Danny smiled. "I'm constantly bowled over by the progress you've made and the fact you still don't know how to pay a compliment without also insulting someone."

"I learned from you."

"Smart arse."

"Come inside."

"You're also a broken record."

"I just want you to be okay and sitting out here in the cold isn't going to fix anything. What can I do?"

"You can't fix this," Danny said, running a hand down Steve's arm. Steve hated it when Danny read his mind.

"But, I must be able to do something."

"All you need to do is be here."

"Always."

Danny smiled weakly.

"Will you come back to bed?" Steve asked.

Danny sighed and leaned into Steve's side. "I can't sleep."

Steve threw his arm over Danny's shoulder. "Okay."

"You don't have to stay up."

"I'm not going anywhere."

Danny let out a long huff of breath. "How do you do this?"

Steve shrugged. "It's partially training and partially…" Steve paused and then continued quietly, "…just me."

"Talk to me about something else."

"What?"

"Anything."

"Your parents are arriving in two weeks."

Danny laughed. "Yes."

"Are you excited?"

Danny shrugged. "I'm pleased we're going to be married."

"That doesn't answer the question," Steve said, getting comfortable.

"I'm looking forward to seeing most of my family."

"I'm looking forward to Lily meeting Chin."

Danny groaned. "I'm terrified of her meeting Chin. He's stoicism is going to be tested. It's going to be a nightmare. Because then she's going to meet Kono. And she's going to give Malia tips. Then they are going to want to come to work and make nuisances of themselves. It's not only that, it's all of them. They are going to all be here, all of them, I know you have met them all but they are going to be so much more intense when they are here."

"They were pretty intense when we were there."

"I know."

"Why do you think they are going to be worse here?" Steve asked, watching Danny slowly relaxing next to him as he was distracted by the conversation.

"Worse? Worse? Do I think my family are going to be worse here than they were in Jersey? They are going to be so, so much worse. They were on their best behaviour when we were in Jersey…their very, very best behaviour."

"That was their best behaviour?"

"Yep, as soon as you put a ring on it you're family and they will stop playing nice."

Steve laughed and rested back into the chair. Danny was quiet next to him but didn't have the manic air about him that he had had before.

"I'm not joking, Steven."

"Of course not."

"You're placating me; I hate it when you do that."

"I'm not doing anything of the sort."

Steve pressed himself into Danny's side, glad for the other man's body heat.

"You're a terrible liar…the worst ever, seriously."

"I'm a great liar."

"You're a worse liar than Gracie…and she has never met a secret she didn't blurt."

Steve huffed. "We kept your present a secret."

"Something that still baffles me."

"You underestimate us."

Danny let out a long, wide yawn that cracked his jaw.

"Come to bed," Steve said quietly, hesitant to even bring it up.

"I don't think I could sleep."

"Then just come up and we'll talk in the warm."

Danny nodded and let Steve lead him back up to their bedroom. Steve pulled the jumper from Danny's torso, ignoring the smaller man's protests, and then pushed him down into the mattress.

"Are you done man-handling me now?"

Steve nodded and twisted his legs in to twin with Danny's. "You know Kono is really, really excited to meet Lily."

"That's because Kono is a Lily in the making."

"I'm not sure if you think that is a compliment or not."

"Neither am I," Danny said, yawning again.

Steve smiled into the dark and cast his mind around for something to talk about which might let Danny fall asleep.

"You know your mother called me last week."

Danny tensed. "Why?"

"She wanted to talk to me about the food for the wedding."

"I told her we had it under control."

Steve nodded, weighing Danny down to the bed. "I know and I told her the same thing but she wants to do more for us."

"This is also supposed to be a holiday for her. Holiday implies she doesn't spend the whole time cooking for us."

"I think she wants to be involved."

"Of course she wants to be involved," Danny said, his voice slowing down. "Being involved is my mother's full time job. It's what she does better than anything else."

"She's amazing."

"I know," Danny said with a lazy smile.

Steve grinned. "I said she could come over and cook us a pre-wedding dinner here for both families."

"What?"

"It's going to be great…well, it's going to be interesting. I thought we could introduce Doris and your family then instead of at the wedding."

Danny groaned and twisted. "That is a terrible idea, Steven."

"You'd prefer for them to meet on our wedding day?"

Danny laughed. "Fine, at a pre-wedding dinner."

"See, I have wonderful ideas."

"Yeah, wonderful."

"I thought it would be nice to take them out on a boat ride around the island."

"You do know…" Danny stopped to yawn lazily. "…that is actually a wonderful idea. They would love that."

"See."

"I don't know when we're going to find the time for all of this though."

"There will be plenty of time."

"We do have a wedding to hold."

Steve smiled broadly, he personally could not wait for their actual wedding ceremony…civil partnership…or whatever they were calling it, he wanted to finally have a ring on his finger and one on Danny's and it felt like he had been waiting forever for this to finally be close. Steve was brought out of his thoughts by a soft snore. He looked at Danny and found the other man asleep. He didn't look peaceful but he was at least asleep and inside out of the cold.

Steve watched Danny sleep for most of the night, holding him a little tighter whenever he got restless. When the sun had been up for a few hours and he couldn't ignore his need to hit the head anymore Steve extracted himself from Danny and went downstairs to start breakfast. He was most of the way through cooking a batch of pancakes when his phone rang.

"McGarrett," Steve answered, watching for bubbles in the cooking pancakes.

"Please hold for Governor Denning."

Steve flipped the pancakes over while he was transferred to the Governor.

"Steve?"

"Morning, Governor, what can I do for you?"

"I've been reading the reports from your recent case."

"We saved Ella," Steve said immediately. He flipped the pancakes out of the frying pan and turned the burners off so that he could focus on the conversation.

"You did, but the methods you used, or rather the methods used by Detective Williams, were beyond the limits of an officer of the HPD."

"He's a member of Five-0, that means he is held to our standards not those of HPD."

"Commander," Governor Denning said cutting Steve off, "he is still a member of the HPD."

"He is under my command and he should be held to the same standards as me."

"If this is where you tell me that if I suspend him you are going to, don't bother. I already know that."

"Good," Steve said,

"But, he, and Five-0, is being watched in light of everything that has been happening recently, Commander. I warned you that there were limits to my ambivalence in regards to your methods. You have reached the limits."

"You want our results, Governor, you need to support our methods."

"We will not be the next national example of police brutality, Commander. This is not the seventies and you will need to be more thoughtful in your methods going forward."

Steve opened his mouth to argue but he could hear Danny on the stairs. "We will take that under advisement."

Governor Denning let out a displeased breath. "You need to take that as gospel if you want to keep Five-0 together, Commander."

Steve felt a jolt of worry over his team…over how Danny would take this news and decided to do what he needed to to make sure they didn't find out and they were safe. "Understood, Governor."

"We will talk again on Monday, Commander."

"I'll see you then."

Steve ended the call and dropped the phone onto the counter as he turned and flipped the pancakes onto the two plates on the table. He turned back to the stove and started cooking the rest of the pancake mixture.

"Who were you talking to?" Danny asked, walking into the kitchen.

"Denning, he called to say Ella was going home Monday."

"That's good."

"Yep," Steve said, flipping the pancakes. "Breakfast?"

"Thanks for last night, babe."

"What?" Steve asked, turning around to look at Danny.

"For helping me sleep."

"You needed to." Steve said with a smile.

"Did you sleep?"

Steve shrugged. "Do you want pancakes?"

"That's a no."

"So long as you did."

"That's not really good enough."

"I'm pretty happy with the outcome."

"Babe."

Steve grinned and tipped the last of the pancakes onto the table. "Eat."

"What do you want to do today?"

"Didn't you want to call the departmental psych?"

"They won't be able to see me immediately."

"That's not good enough."

Danny shrugged. "How about we take the Marquis out for a drive and get away from everything for the day."

"Okay," Steve agreed, pushing the syrup across the table. "We'll drive up to the northern tip, there is this little beach shack with amazing seafood."

"That seems like a better plan than sitting here and stewing."

Steve smiled and pushed the conversation with Denning out of his mind – he had better things to do with his day.

The End

It's done. I know that isn't a very satisfying ending but we're going straight into My Hawaiian Wedding (Jersey Style) [I really do come up with the worst titles] after this and it will deal with the last of the Ella stuff and then it will be all about the wedding.

I have added another story into this series and I wanted to explain. My Hawaiian Wedding continues from this and will be going with canon. Alternative Route to the Same End also follows on directly from this but deviates from canon and changes a few big things from the show.

Lastly, I've been writing this for two years…I feel a bit bad for making you all wait so long but apparently RL will not be denied. That doesn't mean I'm not jumping into the wedding story but I want to thank everyone who has offered encouragement, said they are happy to wait, or who helped keep me going with this. I love this series and I've got plans to keep going for a while…just more slowly than I would like.