Title: The Light

Rating: M

Author: Ellixer

Pairing: X/G

Disclaimer: Characters and show are owned by Universal and others. The story is mine. I make nothing.

Note: On the assumption that Xena was resurrected in the final episode. The evolution of Gabrielle. What path is she really on?

I feel like I'm responsible for killing the good in her. The battle is over and she's standing there, half covered in blood. Her face is hardened and angry. I don't want her to become like me, don't want her to lose any light she has left in her. I fear that light is fading though, and I'm not sure what to do to stop it. She insists she is fine, can handle taking the lives, but her face always says otherwise.

A gash runs the length of her leg, cuts pepper her face, but most of the blood is not her own. I can't think of the right words to say, how to turn her around. She says her path is that of the warrior, but I think her path is more complicated than that. She isn't like me, these deaths weigh heavily on her.

What are my options? Just continue on, let her become hard; stop the fighting, settle somewhere; or I can leave her, but I'm not sure that would stop anything. I'm not sure I can do it either, I can't leave her, I've promised not to. I do my best to erase the worry from my face as she approaches.

'Do you think they'll come back?' She asks of the retreating forces.

'No. We've cut their numbers too much. It will be a long time before they can build their forces up again.' My fingers begin to inspect her wounds.

'I'm fine.' She jerks her head away.

'No. You're not.' But I sigh, walking away off the field of battle. Night is coming on, but I want to get away from here. She follows, sliding her Sais back into the loops on her boots. There are survivors from both sides, picking through the bodies looking for comrades that are still alive. I don't stop to help, we've done our part they need to do the rest.

We're silent till we stop to make camp when the moon is high above us. Part of me wants to just lie down, but the night is getting progressively colder. Gabrielle grabs the bedrolls as I get a fire going. I don't feel like waiting for something to cook however, so I pull some jerky out and chew it.

'Let me look at your cuts.' I break the silence as she sits on the bedroll, pulling a fur around her shoulders. The cut on her leg is shallow but long; she winces as I dab at the exposed wound.

'Xena…you've been looking at me different lately.' It's not a question, just a statement. She stares in to the flames.

'I wonder if my effect on you does more harm than good.' I begin to wrap her leg with a bandage. She stills my hands, looking at me.

'What do you mean?'

'You used to be sooo…different. That light inside of you is going out.'

'Xena, I've been through so much, we've been through so much.' She shakes her head. 'I was a naïve kid when we met.'

'I'm afraid you're becoming like me.' I whisper.

'And that's bad why?' She scoffs.

'Because you're better than me.' I move to finish wrapping her leg. I can still feel her eyes on me though. As I finish I shift my attention to her face.

'Who's to say any other path in life would have been better? I know I'm meant to be here, and you know that too.' She hisses through her teeth as I dab medicine on her wounds. 'Xena.' She looks straight into my eyes. 'You're not responsible for the choices I make.'

'I am if I'm the one limiting your choices.' She pushes my hands away, looking at me with disgust almost.

'I'm not a child, you are not responsible for everything I do.' She practically throws herself down, pulling the fur tight around her. She can be so stubborn, refusing to hear what I'm saying. I lay on my side next to her, my fingers play with her hair.

'I love you.' I whisper into her ear. 'I just don't want to see the good in you disappear.' She rolls, facing me. There are tears in her eyes, her face full of pain. I try to wipe her tears away but there are too many.

'Sometimes I'm not sure I'm doing the right thing, but mostly I know I am.'

'Do you remember what you said after we fought Beleraphon?' Her eyes close a moment as the memories hit her.

'Yeah.' Her voice cracks.

'I can't stand seeing you in that kind of pain. I feel so helpless, I know there's something I should do.' I kiss her cheeks, following the trail of tears. 'Tell me there is something I can do.'

'Xena, you can't keep life from happening.' The tears slow, her face softens. 'Stick by me like I stick by you. My destiny is already laid out, I just don't know what it is yet.' Destiny is what we make it, but I'm not going to say that right now.