Blue Christmas (No Pun Intended)

Author's Note: I'm generally horrible about writing one-shots, more so holiday themed ones. But I decided to take a crack at it, and listened to far too many Christmas songs in the process (to the point where I might be going a bit insane). And this story was inspired by Elvis Presley's version of "Blue Christmas".

Anyway I hope you enjoy this, and reviews are always welcomed and appreciated! :)

The holidays weren't exactly a tradition in Casa de Stark; in fact, the Christmas decorations had only infiltrated the penthouse by means of a nosy CEO and ex-girlfriend, who thought the place, needed sprucing up. And so it was the only reason why garland encompassed much of the lounge, why rainbow colored lights twinkled every which way, and why an oversized evergreen stood vigil in front of the panel of windows that looked out onto the city.

Worse yet, aforementioned CEO and ex had conspired with Tony's AI to play corny Christmas carols on repeat. It didn't matter that Tony proclaimed his ears were bleeding, or that his IQ had fallen several points from the Bing Crosby classics, mixed in with the Frank Sinatra and Elvis Presley ones too; they still just continued to play over and over again.

It didn't necessarily give him any good cheer; in fact, he had spent much of his evening leaning against the bar in the corner, and prayed to whichever deity that was nearby, that he would live through the next three days of the obligatory holiday spirit that was forced upon him.

He poured himself another drink, trying to control the urge to sing along with one JARVIS's favorite songs; or at least the one that was on frequent rotation. He wasn't even of fan of Elvis; and he refused to even think about what the song reminded him of; aside from the sun-bleached TV specials that were shown around the holidays when he was kid.

It wasn't as if he was lonely; he spent the majority of his holidays alone anyway. Not to mention, he did have guests come in from time to time, complimenting the gaudy tree and the mountain of presents stacked underneath it. Sometimes they even contributed to the pile, complaining about how it was impossible to buy the man who had everything a gift. And sometimes his guests even dove underneath the tree, in order to find a present with their name on it, before violently shaking the hell out of it.

Barton had been the most enthusiastic, Romanoff the least. Cap had enjoyed the music, whereas Bruce gave him a sympathetic pat on the back for his enduring the spirit of Christmas exploding all over his tower. And well, then there was Thor who gaped in wonder, asked far too many questions, and demanded that he be permitted to join the festivities; which included a visit to Rockefeller Center to see the Christmas tree lighting.

No one could possibly feel alone with so many visitors. Tony definitely didn't; it wasn't like some urgent matter in Asgard had suddenly cropped up several weeks ago, which only a green-eyed chaos god could take care of. And it wasn't like aforementioned chaos god, had been more than a passing interest to Tony anyway.

Tony took a healthy drink from his glass, squinting at the tree as if trying to dissect it piece from piece. Barton's gifts had been deliberately repositioned on the top of the many stacks, so he could evaluate them further whenever he came for another visit. He was lucky Pepper hadn't been around to see him shake his presents; because that would have awoken the maternal extinct in her, which typically meant killing any fun that might be transpiring. And shaking gifts was a big no-no in her books.

"Man of iron," a thunderous boom of pure Norse god exclaimed, before materializing several feet away from the elevator. "Has your mood improved since we've last seen one another?"

"Do you even hear this music anymore?" Tony pointed upward, as if that would explain his moodiness appropriately.

"Yes, of course. It's rather festive." Thor affirmed, before he approached the bar, and took the liberty of plucking a candy cane from the oversized container Pepper had placed there. "But you are not in high spirits, my friend. And when there is much to be thankful for."

"For someone who didn't understand a thing about the holiday season, you sure transformed into the ghost of Christmas fucking everything. Family values and materialism in one bulky package of muscle." He glowered into his glass. "Besides I'm not a Christmas kind of guy. Pepper is the definition of Christmas, and she's just being cruel now."

Thor observed him in a calculated way, which only surfaced when the Avengers were forced to take on another incredibly tactless super-villain. Tony wasn't exactly thrilled to be on the other end of Thor's stare; but he wasn't about to make an enemy of a guy who could manipulate lightning, and could kill him with a punch to the face. Or he could just shank him with his candy cane, once it was nice and deadly.

"Has this to do with my brother's abrupt departure?" Thor asked slowly, which almost caused Tony to sputter.

"You mean the same brother who destroyed a good portion of the city only two years ago?" Tony coughed, before he turned away to grab the bottle of Macallan from the shelf; although that was just an orchestrated move not to look at the god anymore.

"The same, of course,"

"Because what could make this holiday any better? The Grinch, of course; why didn't I think of that sooner?" He chuckled, especially when he saw the confusion on Thor's face. "I'm sure you'll be well acquainted with the Grinch soon enough; it's Christmas 101, you know."

Thor reached across the bar, planting a heavy hand on his shoulder. Rather than elaborate verbally, he only squeezed his shoulder, and turned to leave. Tony suspected he was off to find one of the others, no doubt on a mission to discover who and what the Grinch was, and how he correlated to his younger brother.

Once the god had disappeared back into the elevator, Tony downed the rest of his scotch with a cringe, before refilling the glass. He returned his attention back to the tree, letting out a heavy sigh.

"JARVIS lower the lights by twenty percent. Might as well make good use of all these Christmas lights, since Pepper did buy out the store,"

The lights lowered, which only heightened the intricately placed decorations. The tree especially came to life; he really had to hand it to Pepper, she knew how to spruce up a bachelor pad into a winter wonderland. Even if he still had murderous thoughts (he blamed Loki for that) for the whole mess she caused.

Rounding the bar, Tony walked towards his favorite spot on the L-shaped sofa. It was the perfect view of the tree and the city; and it would have probably been nice to share it with someone else. Not like he was thinking of that, especially not with the well-documented sociopath he might have bedded from time to time.

Furthermore, he did not miss Loki either. If anything he was glad he left without a goodbye; it wasn't like he wanted to see him off or anything. He wasn't the sentimental type anyway; if that had been the case, maybe he and Pepper would have lasted longer than a year and a half.

Tony sunk into the sofa cushions, balancing his glass onto his stomach; and for the first time since Christmas vomited all over his lounge, he admired every square inch of garland, flashing lights, and knick-knacks placed strategically on every available surface. But he couldn't help but roll his eyes, when the Jackson 5 blared from the speakers.

"Very cute, JARVIS," he mumbled.

"It is one of Miss Potts's favorites, sir," his AI returned.

"Yeah, I can totally see that," he took a drink from his glass. "The Queen of Christmas strikes again."

"So this is how you spend your time. I hadn't the foggiest idea, Stark." A regal voice suddenly asked from behind, which forced him to whip around and catch sight of the intruder.

Loki was surveying the room curiously, although he lacked the enthusiasm Thor had when assaulted by the many decorations. Instead the god of mischief only rounded the room before he slid into an armchair nearby.

He looked severely out of place; he wore all black, accented by silver and gold. He wasn't in battle mode but Viking chic, which was comforting since Tony wasn't in the mood to save the world at the moment.

"What do you want?" Tony asked, settling back into a comfortable position. "I thought you were busy in Asgard, you know on urgent matters."

"I've taken care of it accordingly," Loki brought his fingers together in a steeple, still eyeing everything with growing interest. "And what would you call this?"

"A winter fucking wonderland," he retorted bad-temperedly.

Loki seemed to take his response into account, resting his fingers against his lips, while his eyes darted to and fro. And goddammit if Tony didn't find that kind of endearing; Loki resembled a befuddled child, who was trying their hardest to understand something that was clearly out of their scope of knowledge.

"It's going to be Christmas," Tony finally supplied. "So Pepper decided to decorate the place to the nines; all you really need to know is that it's a commercialized holiday, where we buy each other overpriced shit out of apparent affection."

"So I see," Loki returned, although Tony figured he didn't have a clue what was still going on.

Christmas was one of those holidays that looked perfectly sane to the people who had always celebrated it; but to an outsider like Loki, Tony imagined it looked like a schizophrenic had gone amok.

Now that he really thought about it, there was a live tree in his lounge covered in flashing lights and ornaments of all shapes and sizes; and for some unforeseeable reason he bought people gifts (technically Pepper did) and threw them under the tree's branches just for shits and giggles.

"I didn't get you anything, sorry," he took a sip from his glass. "No, I take that back. I'm not sorry, at all, actually."

"Petty," Loki muttered in return, while still studying the room in heightened curiosity.

"Because you'd be so easy to buy for; the super-villain and alien prince who has it all; I doubt you'd want an iPod or shitty Yule long."

"I desire nothing from you,"

"Aside from when I bend you over the-"

"Still your tongue," Loki hissed, no longer interested in the decorations; in fact he looked like he was a split-second away from setting everything on fire, Tony included.

Tony held up a hand in defeat, in hopes that would stave off an unnecessary attack. He wouldn't be opposed to the decorations going up in flames; but he suspected the Christmas carols would still carry on, even when he was burning to death.

"That was Chinese for – I missed you," he grinned, since he wasn't comfortable with the glint in the god's eye. "And daddy gets cranky when he doesn't get his medicine."

The murderous expression on Loki's face faded away, replaced by one that was a mixture of exasperation, disbelief, and disgust. He'd often gotten that look, especially when Loki was at a loss for words which was just dandy in comparison to when he was experiencing homicidal thoughts.

Sitting up slightly, he motioned for the mayhem god to join him on the couch; even though he still wasn't consumed with fuzzy feelings for him at the moment. But what the hell, it was the holidays and Loki did look pretty good even in the glimmer of the Christmas lights.

Wordlessly, although he made a show of how insufferable it really was for him to move, Loki stood from his seat before approaching the couch with feigned nonchalance. Tony reached for his arm, but Loki pulled away with a sneer; it was hard to tell if he either wanted to strike or disappear again. But instead of doing either of those things, the god settled beside him, close enough that their thighs brushed against one another's.

Hook line and sinker.

Tony counted back from ten, already familiar with this song and dance. There was a proper way to approach Loki, and there was a million improper ways to approach him; but the number one rule was to wait a few seconds before establishing any sort of physical contact with him, unless Loki initiated it first.

It was a matter of trial and error, and he found that at least ten seconds was a fair amount of time before it was okay to broach the distance between them. Slowly he grazed his hand over Loki's knee, paused half a beat, and then dragged his hand up his thigh, and left it there.

"How did, you know, the urgent matter go?" Tony asked, gauging the god's reaction; although the bastard's face was trained into neutrality.

"As to be expected,"

"Right, okay, that's good,"

"Quite," the god muttered, leaning back into the awaiting cushions, and crossing his arms.

Tony studied him still, and could make out the telltale signs of relaxation. It was only a matter of time before they fell back into their old routine. And like clockwork, Loki slouched into the cushions, and propped his booted feet onto the coffee table, perfectly at ease in enemy territory.

Again Tony counted back from ten before he initiated further contact. This time he was bolder; he threw his arm around Loki's shoulder and pulled him closer. Loki froze for exactly five seconds, until he gave into Tony's whim and melded into his side. But it wouldn't have been Loki if he didn't mutter out mortal in the most disdainful way ever.

"Stupid as it may seem, I was kind of pissed that you wouldn't be here for Christmas," Tony sniffed, trying to downplay his declaration. "It's, you know, a big deal. To be together for the holidays; even though I'm used to spending them alone."

"What of your Avengers?" Loki rolled his eyes, before glancing at him from his peripheral.

"Yeah, that is totally not what I'm talking about," Tony squeezed his shoulder gently. "Do I have to spell it out to you?"

"No," Loki returned quietly.

May it have been an intentional act or not, Tony wasn't sure, but Loki leaned his head against his and let out a long suffering sigh. Tony rolled his eyes in return, because hey Loki wasn't the only one suffering over the stupidity of their coupling, or relationship, or fucking, or whatever it was that they had. It was still undefined, and neither of them were about to give it a name.

They fell into a peaceable quiet, both focused on the oversized evergreen that Tony was warming up to more and more; he would have to thank Pepper with an extravagant gift, but without her figuring out why. That was the last thing he needed, for her to know he was getting into the Christmas spirit.

"Stark," the god said, tilting his head, and allowing Tony to nuzzle his cheek.

"Hmm,"

"This music is positively dreadful,"

"I don't know, it's kind of growing on me," he laughed slightly. "And to quote the King of Rock and Roll – I'll have a blue Christmas without you; no pun intended, of course."

"Whoever this king is, he doesn't sound very bright," Loki grumbled. "You should expect more from a king."

"I take offense; he's our greatest poet."

"And you questioned my attempt at ruling you?"

"I'll have a blue Christmas without you," Tony sang softly into Loki's ear, unable to contain the foolish grin that spread across his lips. "I'll be so blue just thinking about you."

The god drew away from him; a cross look was on his face, as if Tony had insulted his mother. Of course, using blue and Loki in any way together would invoke such a reaction, even with a disclaimer attached. Just as Loki opened his mouth to retaliate with something that was bound to be nasty and un-Christmas like, Tony pulled him closer and kissed him.

The seconds ticked away without any discernible reaction from Loki; but he eventually, as he always did, gave into Tony. Tony kissed him until they were both thoroughly breathless; and it hardly surprised him that Loki looked crosser than before, except it was more of a pout than his: I will kill you, for I am a god and it's my right to squash you underneath my boot look.

"I loathe you, Stark,"

"Me too, Reindeer Games, me too," Tony squeezed his shoulder again, deciding not to point out the fact that Loki was now resting his head on his chest just above the arc reactor, and was beginning to look completely and indisputably contented.

And well, maybe Christmas wasn't so bad after all.