Warning! This story contains references to two very bad Christmas jokes I have heard in the past week: Read at your own risk!

Reasons to be Concerned about Lily Luna at Christmas

The doors to the school bus opened up and six-year old Lily Luna Potter hurtled through them like an arrow from a longbow, straight into the waiting arms of her father, one Harry James Potter.

Despite the fact that his whole family were magical, Harry had insisted that all his children attend Muggle primary school before they entered Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. He very much wanted them to have knowledge of and be comfortable within the Muggle world.

"Daddy!" Lily shouted excitedly as her arms wrapped around his neck.

"Hey, Lily." Harry said with a chuckle "How was school?"

"It was fun!" replied Lily "They let us make Christmas decorations today, cuz it's the last day."

"Oh yeah?" asked Harry, setting her down on the ground as the school bus drove off. Today had been the last day of school before the kids broke up for the Christmas Holidays "And what decoration did you make?"

"I made a star out of cardboard and tin foil for the top of the tree." Lily explained.

"Uh-huh. And what else did you do?"

"We sung lots and lots of Christmas carols. And then we learned all about the story of Christmas."

"Oh yeah? Well what is the story of Christmas?" Harry asked

"Um, it's about a little baby who was born in a barn under a big star." replied Lily, making sure to stomp on a piece of slushy snow that splattered in all directions.

"Is that right? And what was that little baby called?"

Lily paused for a moment, clearly deep in thought as she tried to remember.

Finally she offered up a surprising answer.

"He was called Wayne." she declared.

Harry stared at her incredulously. What kind of teachers were they employing at that school?

"Wayne?" he asked "Where'd you get "Wayne" from?"

"The song." Lily replied.

"The song? What song?"

Lily took a breath and began to sing:

"A "Wayne" in a manger…"

Harry went cross-eyed and he was fairly certain that a small part of his brain frazzled and died.

Harry was sitting on the sofa, watching as Lily and Rose did some colouring in in their Christmas books. Rose was making a beautiful job of colouring in Father Christmas, with his white beard, rosy cheeks and red hat and coat. Worryingly Lily had decided that her reindeer should be coloured pink with purple antlers.

Everyone else had gone off to do some last minute shopping before Christmas, leaving Harry in charge of the two girls.

Deciding to test his daughter, Harry asked "Lily? Seeing as you are colouring in a reindeer, can you name all of the reindeer that pull Father Christmas's sleigh?"

Lily thought for a moment before answering "Rudolph… Blitzen… Comet… um…"

Seeing this his daughter was stuck, Harry turned to the other girl "Rose, do you know?"

Rose scrunched up her nose a little as she thought for her answer, and then replied "Dasher, Dancer and Prancer… um… Cupid…" she trailed off.

Suddenly Lily piped up and exclaimed "Oh, I know. Olive!"

Rose looked at her funny as Harry gaped.

"That's not a reindeer." said Rose.

"It is too." retorted Lily.

"Lily, where on Earth did you get "Olive" from?" asked Harry.

"The song." replied Lily, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

A feeling of dread welled up in Harry, but he just had to ask "And what song if that?"

Lily stood to her feet and began to sing;

"Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer had a very shiny nose. And if you ever saw it, you would even say it glows. "Olive" the other reindeer, used to laugh and call him names…"

With a groan of despair, Harry buried his face in his hands as Rose broke down into a fit of giggles.

A/N: I WARNED YOU THAT THEY WERE BAD JOKES! YOU'VE GOT NO ONE TO BLAME BUT YOURSELF!