Title: Old Traditions, New Interpretations
Author: XpaperplaneX
Rating: PG
Word Count: ~2200
Pairing: Sephiroth/Cloud
Genre: humour
Warnings: none
Disclaimer: I do not own FFVII or Crisis Core and make no money from this work.
Summary: It's nearly New Year's and Cloud's missing the traditions from Nibelheim.

Happy new year, everyone! My cat celebrated my safe return from the festivities by running around my room at three AM quacking like a duck for an hour. Like a fucking duck. He is tragically still alive.

This was written for A New Year's Dirge, the New Year's themed FFVII yaoi anthology put together by Xiaa. There's a lot of great stuff in it, and you can get the whole thing here (take out the spaces):

proj-ff7xmas. livejournal 8438. html

My theme was fire.

XXX

"Got any New Year's traditions?" Cloud asked as he flipped through the latest copy of the Midgar Review that had been lying on Sephiroth's bedside table.

"Hmm?" Sephiroth paused in braiding his hair for the night.

"You know, things you do every year for New Year's." Cloud tossed the magazine aside and reached over to help Sephiroth finish.

"I go to the New Year's party. It's a requirement."

A hand whacked his back gently. "No, not like that. You know, traditions! Like ... like maybe the SOLDIERs all sing a song that has a special meaning for them, or I dunno. That sounds dumb now that I say it out loud. But you know what I mean?"

"I think so," Sephiroth said to humour him, "but no, we don't have anything like that. Why do you ask?"

"Ah, I was just thinking about home. It's been ages since I've been back, and I sort of miss the New Year's celebrations. I'm not homesick or anything, I just wondered if you did anything like we do in Nibelheim."

"What do you do in Nibelheim? Maybe we can do it here." Sephiroth didn't really care much for the idea of some sort of ritual, but he could do something small to make Cloud feel more at home.

Cloud's eyes lit up as he smiled. "We build a huge bonfire in the middle of the town, and everyone gathers round. Then just before midnight, we toss in something that symbolizes the bad memories from the past year. That way they won't follow us into the new year and we can start fresh. I used to throw in a whole bunch of stuff; it always made me feel better."

"So," Sephiroth paused to process, "you burn your bad memories away?"

"Yeah, it's kind of hokey, but it really helps you move on sometimes. When I was eight, Mom burned every picture that had either her and Dad, or just Dad in them. She started dating again the next week."

Sephiroth continued to process; the idea of simply burning bad memories away didn't seem very sensible, but he knew that people's minds didn't always accept the sensible approach. If it worked for Cloud, his mother, and the entire village of Nibelheim, why couldn't it work for him?

"Don't worry about it," Cloud said. "A big bonfire in the middle of the parade square probably wouldn't go over very well with the higher-ups."

"No ... We'd need a bigger fire than that."

"Eh?"

"I have a lot of bad memories. It's more efficient to go directly to the source."

"Umm ... " Cloud opened and closed his mouth a few times, but didn't say any more.

"It's not a problem. You do this near midnight on New Year's Eve, correct?" At Cloud's slow nod, he continued, "We'll go to the party as is required, but leave at 2330. Fair will make an excuse for me. We'll take the stairs to the sixty-seventh floor to avoid being caught by security; I happen to know that the security cameras in the stairwells have been down for the past three months—"

"Wait, wait, wait!" Cloud held up his hands, and Sephiroth stopped talking immediately, though he continued to calculate silently. "Why are we going to sixty-seventh floor?"

"Because that's where Professor Hojo's lab is. Technically the main lab is on the sixty-eighth, but we'll start on sixty-seven."

"And?"

"And the entire place is a bad memory, so we'll burn it down."

"Oh." Cloud blinked several times. "Isn't that arson?"

"Fair once told me that it only counts if you get caught. We won't get caught."

"Couldn't we—I mean, the whole burning bad memories thing is supposed to be symbolic. Like, Mom never actually set Dad on fire, much as she would have liked to."

"I'm not proposing to set Professor Hojo alight," Sephiroth reassured him. "Merely his lab. Do you think that it would work the same if we used materia to start the fire? Or does the effectiveness lie in the setting of the fire? If that's the case, a more traditional method would probably be best. I can see if I can arrange for some gasoline—it's an excellent fuel source, people used to use it before mako energy became widespread. I do think we'll need something to help the fire along; most things in the lab aren't very flammable."

Cloud continued to stare at Sephiroth while he spoke until he finally gave his head a shake. "You ... you work out the details. I'm going to go to sleep. If you get me in trouble," he said with a yawn, "I'm going to say you coerced me."

"Mmm, good plan." Sephiroth nodded in agreement. "Sleep well." He leaned over and gave Cloud a quick peck on the top of his head, then pulled the blankets over him. He then went to his study where he pulled up the blueprints of the building and began making notes until the room began to turn red with the dawn.

XXX

Cloud resisted the urge to hide his face in his hands—not that it would save him if anyone came along—as he stood outside the control room keeping watch. Sephiroth said he wouldn't be more than three minutes and it had already been five. What was taking him so long? He was going to be kicked out of SOLDIER before he even had a chance to sew the bars onto his uniform. It would probably be a record. And his dress shoes were horribly uncomfortable to boot. Why couldn't they have just stayed at the party and got wasted like sane people?

The door clicked behind him, interrupting Cloud's silent berating of himself for ever bringing up traditions, and Sephiroth hurried out of the room. "Let's go."

"Did you do what you needed to?" Cloud asked as he jogged to keep up with Sephiroth's longer strides. He more than half hoped that there had been a problem and the whole thing would be called off.

"Of course. The fire alarm and sprinkler system are disabled, and the locks are wide open. I took longer than expected because I wanted to make certain that the cameras were still down. We have to hurry, however; I set the systems to go back to normal in an hour." Sephiroth turned and grinned at him, an expression so unlike his normal one that Cloud wasn't quite sure what he was seeing at first. "Are you excited?"

"Uh, yeah, sure." What else could he say? He could hardly tell Sephiroth that he was quaking in his boots at the thought of being tossed out of SOLDIER, not when he was looking so happy.

"Don't worry. You really can say that I coerced you if we get caught."

"Good, 'cause I am, and you'd better back me up."

"I will. But really, we won't get caught. I'm the top SOLDIER in Shinra for a reason, you know."

There was that. And it was even slightly reassuring. Sephiroth had been planning pretty much nonstop since he first got the idea. Even if he hadn't informed Cloud of all the details, it'd be all right. He reached for Sephiroth's hand as they approached the stairwell.

"Ow ... stitch." Cloud dropped the heavy jerry can he had been carrying and clutched his side, leaning against the wall beside the door with a big 67 on it. "Did we have to run?"

"Yes, now let's hurry. No one should be in here. Have you still got what you want to burn?"

"Right here." Cloud held up the letter informing him that his application for SOLDIER had been rejected. He had made it on his second try, but he had hung on to the letter for the sole purpose of being able to burn it come New Year.

"Good." Sephiroth did something with the lock and the door swung open silently onto a darkened room full of weird machinery and cages.

"I've never been up here ... It's so creepy. Hey, what's in the cages?"

"Specimens, most likely. Here, take one of the jerry cans and start pouring, I'll go up."

"What? We can't burn the place if there are living creatures in here!"

Sephiroth stared at him for a few seconds while Cloud glared fiercely. "Fine. I'll move them, but that means you need to be quick about getting the gas ready. Start upstairs; I don't want you walking through gas, so plan out your path."

Cloud nodded and grabbed two of the jerry cans, heaving them up and setting off toward the staircase on the other side of the room. He heard Sephiroth approaching the cages, and a cacophony of snarling, barking, and hissing rose up. He hoped there wasn't anything too dangerous.

He set to work on the far side of the room and worked his way back towards the stairs. As he approached, he heard an outbreak of swearing then a sleep spell being cast. "Everything okay?"

"Just fine. I am wondering, however, why I'm saving something that can sting, bite, and breathe fire."

"You're a good person, Sephiroth. Upstairs is all doused," he said, tossing down the empty can.

"Good. Did you leave a trail of gas on the stairs?" Sephiroth heaved an unconscious something over his shoulder—Cloud could see the wicked-looking stingers on its tail and hoped that it hadn't managed to sting Sephiroth.

"Yep, it should spread up no problem."

"Okay, this is the last one, then I'll help you out down here. Make sure you get that specimen containment unit over there."

"Got it." Cloud grabbed another jerry can and went over to douse it extra thoroughly. He couldn't even imagine what Sephiroth had gone through in this lab, but the least he could do was help him burn it down.

Sephiroth joined him in time to take the last can of gas. "All right," he said as he tossed it down, "this is going to get very hot, very quickly. I want you standing by the door, holding it open. As soon as I'm through, close it. These are fire doors, so we'll be safe in the stairwell."

"Yes, sir." Cloud jogged over to the door that was propped open with an empty jerry can and moved it out of the way. "Will I have time to toss my letter in after you've started the fire, or should I do that now?"

"It would have more meaning if you put it in after the fire has started, wouldn't it? I'll come over there. I'm going to cast a fire spell towards the back of the room, but then I'll do a small one closer to us. Be ready to throw the letter in, then get back to the stairwell."

"Right." Cloud moved in so he was still propping the door open with his foot and crumpled up the letter so it was ready to throw. "Any time."

Sephiroth grinned at him again, and again Cloud was struck by how uncharacteristic the expression was, then he turned and sent three huge fireballs flying towards the stairwell. The resulting explosions nearly threw Cloud off balance, and the temperature in the room rose noticeably. Sephiroth launched a smaller, single fireball at some crates near them, and as the flames began to spread, Cloud tossed his letter in.

"Take that, you bastards," he said gleefully, "I'll show you no potential!" Then he pushed the door open all the way and held it for Sephiroth. As soon as he was through, he slammed it shut, cutting off the heat and the sound of everything burning. "We did it!"

"We did, now let's get out of here." Sephiroth grabbed his hand and began running down the stairs.

"Where did you put the specimens?" Cloud asked as he skipped down the stairs two at a time.

"Sixty-sixth floor. All the execs' offices are there, so I was able to keep them separated. It should be an interesting addition to the chaos for them. There were some ordinary-looking cats that I stuck in Tuesti's office; he loves cats, so maybe he'll take them home. And I let one of the specimens go. It could speak and asked me to let it leave. Said it needed to return to its tribe. I hope it was the right thing to do."

"Of course it was. I know you couldn't just let them all go since they were probably dangerous, but ... "

"I thought you'd say that. Now hurry, we've got to get back to my place so we can be in the middle of fucking when I get called in about the fire."

"What!?"

"That's our excuse—we left early to go have sex."

"I can't believe your plan is to leave me with blue balls."

"I'm sure we should have to suffer for our traditions; it makes them all the more important that way. Otherwise we might just start setting fire to everything."

"Okay, okay," Cloud grumbled, "And then we'd just be crazy arsonists, I suppose."

XXX

A/N: In hindsight, Cloud got off easy in comparison to duck-cats.