Sheldon Swifties XXVIII: "They The Accused…"
Summary: Like my Immortal Beloved bits in my Buffyverse stories, these are fragments and short bits, some longer…Just to fiddle with ideas, possibly forming longer tales later.
Disclaimer: All is Chuck's…
Sweeping dark-toned theme of "Downton Abbey" plays…
"I can't believe you guys like 'Downton Abbey'…" Penny beams…
"Well…" eyeing an eager Raj, swept up in the dark melancholy of the theme… "I suppose I can believe some of you would…"
"Excuse me…I am here under protest solely through enforcement of the Relationship Agreement…" protesting voice…
"Are you saying you don't like it?..." Sheldon, perturbed…
"I find it inferior in story and characterization to 'Upstairs, Downstairs' which I suffered through as a child being forced to watch it with my mother…" Amy, shaking head… "And in general, the notion of the lives of pampered English aristocrats having any meaningful association to our current modern America far-fetched…"
"But…Carson sets such a nice table…" Sheldon, sighing…
"Agreed…" Amy nods… "But Hudson would have caught several glaring flaws such as the fork placement and that centerpiece…"
"I'm with Amy on this one…" Leonard cuts in… "Well…Not the fork and centerpiece thing…Just can't quite see the characters and story matching up to 'Galactica' or 'Babylon5'…"
Huhla-huh…Sheldon… "Bazinga, right?...As to 'Babylon5'…"
"No…" Leonard frowning…As Penny rolls eyes…
"Besides…" Sheldon shrugs… "Character-smcharacter…Look how elegantly that table is set…"
"And Mrs. Hughes always adds her own inimitable touch…" Raj notes…
"Well, I like it…" Howard, glancing to ceiling…
"Uh-huh…You mean Bernadette likes it so you better like it…" Leonard…
"Hey…" Howard, frowning… "While of course the sacred remote is shared in the Rostenkowski-Wolowitz household…"
"I'm noting you put Bernadette in front, Howard…" Leonard grins…
"Yeah?...So am I, wanna-be fiancée…" Penny eyes him…
"You know I was going to say I like the show so Howie could look like a model husband but in fact, I'm so-so on it…Stick that in your hobbity paws, Hofstadter…" Bernadette, glaring…
"Oh, this is like Bates and his late ex-…" Raj shaking head… "Can't we just get along and enjoy the wonder of my native land's oppressors' countryside?...Heck, people if I can forgive…"
"Sorry…" Leonard sighs… "You guys have a right to like what you like…And it's not a bad show, just a little, like Amy says…" hastily to Penny's frown… "…weak in characterization and story…"
"For example…" Amy cuts in… "Anyone can tell Anna murdered the first Mrs. Bates and set up the phony suicide…"
All but Sheldon…Still lost in happy contemplation of the dining room on TV…Staring…
"What?..." Leonard, blinking… "But Anna's so…"
"…weakly characterized?…I knew you liked her…" Penny grins..
"Leonard, it's only logical…If Sheldon's ex-wife or girlfriend was a vicious shrew, reducing my saintly beloved Sheldon to misery and suffering and standing on my happiness with him like a neural tumor on a nerve ending, I'd certainly kill the bitch and make it look like an accident or suicide…" Amy notes calmly… "If they charged Sheldon, after a period during which my devoted support and confidence in his innocence (certainly real enough) would win reinvestigation of the facts, the case would swiftly fall apart when no evidence of a male involvement was found…"
Wow…Raj eyes Howard…You know Anna does seem the very determined type…
"Amy…" Penny chuckles… "You couldn't hurt a fly…"
"A fly no, a threat to my beloved, certainly…Heck, if you only knew the elaborate scheme I'd worked out to do you in when I thought you and Sheldon might have had something going…" Amy, contentedly… "I mean I've even managed to get you to accept me as your bestie, even to let me come into your bedroom claiming an interest in lesbian experimentation…"
Huh?...Penny stares…
Leonard blinking…
"I was wondering if Penny would ever catch on to that…" Bernadette notes, calmly…
"Of course, we're all better now…And I'm your utterly trustworthy bestie…Sincerely…" Amy..Sight movement of eyes to ceiling…