Disclaimer: Touhou and Familiar of Zero belong to their respective owners.

…

The Witch's Zero

Chapter1: Tome, Portals and Boredom

The Witch

For the past few days, my health has been terrible. More terrible than normal, even. I was forced to lie in bed and waited for my medicine from the lunarian doctor to arrive. Besides that, the black and white rat stole, or 'borrowed' as she put, more of my books during my stay in bed. Probably the gatekeeper was slacking at that time.

Today, however, I feel fantastic. In fact, I feel even better than the time when Flandre broke out of her room after her sister got defeated by the local shrine maiden for the mist incident. If the rat decides to steal my books today, she will have a nasty surprise waiting for her.

I am Patchouli Knowledge, the Seven Day Wizard, elementalist extraordinaire and by far, the most intelligent magician in the way of magic in Gensokyo. Primarily, my abilities are focused on elementism. To be more accurate, the eastern elemental system; which are Fire, Water, Wood, Metal, Earth, Sun, and Moon. Other known abilities, or the ones I recalled, are the summoning and binding of entities, which was proven by the little devil that serves me roughly unpaid and also an impressive showpiece of a familiar. There are other skills that I cannot recall at the moment, but with rereading on a subject once will refresh my memory.

Now, I am currently reviewing a tome I took from the private part of my library, where most of the dangerous grimoires and tomes are resting. Its location is unknown to anyone but me and my familiar. Even if someone was to find it, a powerful sleeping spell will be placed upon them and they will have nightmares until the spell is lifted.

The tome that I took, Nothingness: the Zero Element was a new addition to the library recently. It reviews about the ability to control nothingness. As foolish as it sounded, the ability was actually very dangerous. I do not know more other than my reason to read this, which was to learn a cancelling spell. Though there were other kinds of dispelling and anti-magic spells, the spell from this branch of magic was the most powerful of all cancelling spells as it can cancel most spells with high power in it, like a certain spell called Master Spark. I can imagine the face the rat makes when her spell suddenly got cancel and take a fireball to the face. It would be amusing to watch. As I was about to read, Sakuya Izayoi, the chief maid of the mansion, appeared beside me.

"Patchouli-sama, the Mistress requires your presence at the balcony." At this time? It's still in the middle of the afternoon.

"On what occasion?" I asked.

"She said she wanted someone to talk to over a cup of tea." Well, she always feels bored. I guessed I could use a bit of sunshine.

"Alright." I said. She nodded and reappeared at the door. The tome has been heavily warded to prevent theft and unwanted use from unwanted people, but I put a concealment spell on it that the only way to find or see it is to know the name of the tome, just in case the rat decides to visit unannounced.

On my way to the door, I noticed what looks like a green portal near one of the bookshelves. I blinked, and it disappeared. Interesting. I wonder if the rat has found another way to break in. I scryed the area near the bookshelf to see if the rat is in the library.

Fortunately, she isn't. But unfortunately, this had me worried. A portal that somehow hid its presence from the wards that were placed around my library has appeared and anything or anyone may or may not come out of it. Since the wards didn't pick up anything yet, I sent a telepathic message to my familiar to be alerted of any trespassers lurking in the library. With that done, I walked to the door.

"Sakuya, there may or may not be unwanted guests inside the mansion. Please see it that you deal with them accordingly if you found any of them." The maid nodded and escorted me to the balcony where Remilia was waiting; after I put a spell to detect any unnecessary entrances were made.

…

We arrived at the balcony, where the mistress of the mansion and my old friend, Remilia Scarlet, is currently sipping her tea at a table with a parasol on it to protect her from sunlight. Though I wonder why she wanted to have tea outside in the afternoon, with her being a vampire and all, was beyond me. But then again, to her, sunlight is just a daily annoyance. I took my seat at the table and sipped my tea.

"It seems that you are in a good mood today, Remi, to have tea outside in the middle of the afternoon," I said.

She grinned and said "Ah, Patchy. Sometimes we have to appreciate the beauty of nature. Look at the scenery. It is quite majestic, don't you think so?"

How unusual of her choice of topic, but then again, this is Remi. I looked at the scenery, and it was quite beautiful. "True. So Remi, you seem kind of bored."

She froze, and then her head slumped down onto the table, looking defeated. "Uuu~… sharp as always I see," she muttered.

"Of course. Otherwise, I cannot even see the rat that has been stealing my books. Speaking of rats, it seems that there was a portal that appeared in my library, and there may or may not be some uninvited guests lingering in the halls," I said.

Remilia perked up at this. "Oh? This looks interesting. Sakuya, see is there any interesting going on in the mansion," she said.

"Of course, Mistress," the maid nodded. I blinked and her expression shifted a little. Ah, the use of time magic is simply convenient.

"I'm sorry, Mistress. There doesn't seem to be anyone beside the residents in the mansion." She said.

Remilia sighed."There has been nothing interesting in these last few days," the vampire said.

Then her face brighten up like she has an idea, which most of it turned out bad or getting a rough visit by the shrine maiden in the end. "I know, we should start another incident..."

"No," I stated. Remilia pouted. I sighed. She gets bored rather easily, though not as easily as a certain border yoikai. Perhaps I could try to entertain her, since my health is at its peak. Besides, I could find out the extent of my power.

"Then how about we have a danmaku duel, Remi? My health seems to be in great shape today. In fact, maybe I could win easily against you," I said with a grin.

Remilia smirked. "Oh, do you now, Patchy? It has been awhile since our last duel. It seems I have to remind you who is at the top of the pyramid," she said.

"Won't that be Flandre?" I asked.

"She doesn't count," she replied instantly.

"So, shall we do this inside?" I asked with a grin.

"Ah, I thought you never asked," she said and turned to Sakuya. "Sakuya, escort us to the hall."

"Yes Mistress," the maid nodded and we moved to a large hall. Me and Remilia both took our stand.

"Now then. Show me your power, witch!" she claimed.

"I hope you're ready to face me, vampire!" I said.

With that, we took flight and filled the hall with danmaku.

…

Well, that went well. I could have said I almost won the duel. Almost is the word here. It seemed that Flandre have broken out of her room again and intervened my duel with Remilia. Then it turned into a three-versus-one duel, with Sakuya, Remilia, and me against the little sister. Though we managed to win the duel, it left us quite exhausted and our clothes torn.

Sakuya carried the sleeping little sister back to her room and Remilia left to her room to change but not before mentioning that our duel will be postponed to a later date. Not that I minded since our condition is quite unfortunate at the moment. After changing my clothes, I proceeded to my library so I can read the tome that I left on the desk…

Only to find that it was not on the desk. This troubled me. It seemed that someone has stolen the tome, which means this could be disastrous if the thief manages to comprehend the knowledge inside the tome, if he is skillful as me that is. I asked Koakuma, my devil familiar who happened to be beside the desk, about the tome and she said a small green portal appeared beneath the tome took it and disappeared before she could grab it. I arched an eyebrow as my mind wondered how she could see it since it was under a concealment spell and as like she read my mind, she said she managed to take a peek at the tome and read the name of it before I put the spell. I didn't particularly mind it since she was my familiar and she went back to placing the books on the shelves. My mind wandered back to the portal as how it can escape the detection spell I placed before I left. It suddenly clicked my mind that the detection spell I placed could not detect a portal as small as the tome. I should have put another spell that detects small portals. But now is not the time to think about the past.

Now I have to trace back the portal to where it came from since it left some scent of magic. Speaking of portals, it seemed that another portal was appearing at the moment since the detection spell picked up something. I located the portal and it seemed to be… right under my feet. I realized this just as the portal sucked me in and I didn't even have time to fly away as my senses went blank.

…

Author's note: Yay! My first story. I was so excited to post this story here. I always read many Touhou, particularly the ones with Patchouli Knowledge, as she is my favorite character, and Familiar of Zero stories here. Because of that, my mind seems to be filled with many ideas. This is one of those ideas that most of the time swirling in my head that I can't get it out. I always wondered what would happen when Patchouli getting summoned by Louis. And so this is what would happen from my point of view.

Anyway, back to the story. I think I managed to interpret how Patchouli and the others talk in casually like friends way. Let me know guys if I didn't get it right.

I would really appreciate if you guys read and review it. Maybe leave some critics as well so I can improve my writing since English is not my first language. I hope you guys enjoy this as I am.