Disclaimer: Neon Genesis Evangelion is copyright by A.D. Vision and was created by Studio Gainax animation while Darth Sidious and the Sith are trademark of Disney. All these characters are used without permission.

WCain Man here. Hope you like this chapter. I just finished 'Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic' and got the 'evil' ending. I'm only going to say this once: PLAY THAT GAME! Go out to Wal-Mart and shell out the fifty bucks cause take it from it, it is the best SW game ever! After playing that, I KNOW George Lucas would be proud. Hope you like it.

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Shinji, Lord of the Sith

Chapter Three:

Tests of the Sith

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Tests are horrible things. Ask any college student and they will tell you that. Tests are terrible to undergo.

Sith tests are the worst.

The Dark Lord eyed his apprentice coolly from beneath his robes. Shinji was wearing a black hakama minus the shirt. He was quite muscular now. Practicing countless Sith katas for hours non-stop would earn anyone a firm body. His body, though, would not be tested this time. This was a history test.

Darth Sidious walked circles Shinji in a slow methodical pace. Shinji did not follow his master's steps. He stared straight ahead, never once looking to the side. Sith look towards the future, not the past which Jedi cling to.

"Tell me, my young apprentice, who were the ones that lead Naga Sadow to the civilized galaxy?"

Shinji closed his eyes as he reached into the reaches of his memory. "5000 years ago, it was Gav and Jori Daragon who lead the dark lord-" he strained to correctly pronounce the name "-Naga Sadow from Korriban, beginning the Great Hyperspace War." Shinji breathed a sigh of relief. He spoke it as it was pronounce. Once he said "Nega Shadow" and had earned several painful shocks from Sidious' dark force lightning.

"Good, my apprentice. Very Good. Now... which Daragon sibling was Naga Sadow's apprentice?"

"It... was the brother, Gav. Later, the fool denounced the teachings of his master and led the Republic to the Sith Lord's base. Gav died by Naga Sadow's hands afterwards."

"What was the name of Exar Kun's apprentice and how did the traitor die after betraying his master?"

Easy question. "The traitorous apprentice was Ulic Qel-Droma and he died from being shot in the back by a glory seeking pilot. An ignoble death for an ignoble man."

"And what was the fate of the apprentice, Darth Malak, who betrayed his master, Darth Revan, to the Jedi?"

"Malak died by his former master's hands; though Revan was Sith no longer. He had returned to ranks of the Jedi and later married Bastila Shan, the very Jedi who captured him and help the Jedi erase his memory as a Sith Lord."

"A millennia ago, how did Darth Bane's student, Kaan, meet his end?"

"Kaan was killed after he tried to murder Darth Bane with a 'Thought Bomb', a Force weapon that suicidal consumes everything within the blast radius in an attempt to kill Bane and the Jedi. The Sith Lord survived as was his destiny while the traitor did not."

"Your knowledge of our history is quite admirable. But what lesson is there to learn from all these apprentices?"

Shinji's emotions flared. "Apprentices who betray their Master die ignoble deaths, often by their own Master's hands! An apprentice's duty is to be his master's sword and shield! Only when the master dies by his own accord may the apprentice ascend to be the master!"

Sidious nodded, darkness emitting from his pleasure for his pupil's intelligence. He had trained Shinji well. He clapped in approval. "You both understand and comprehend Sith history. You have done well in your teachings. Perhaps you should be rewarded? Would that please you, my young apprentice?"

"Master, I will accept anything from you be it a reward or strife."

Sidious gave a soft laugh, a laugh that sounded more hollow than anything Shinji ever heard before. "I believe that is what you would call, the 'textbook answer'. Be honest, my apprentice, what do you desire?"

Shinji could tell that there was something in Sidious' tone and that another lie would not be wise. He bowed his head. "Master, I want to further my training. I want to be stronger in both body and the Force. I want... real training. I want the kind of training that would break a Navy SEAL! I want to be train and be able to slaughter a legion of Jedi! The training that would let me kill my father!"

Sidious' lips twisted into a smile. "Very well. You shall receive... that training. I hope you have the fortitude to endure."

Shinji kneeled. "I will, master. I promise."

Eight days later at the NERV medical wing...

Ritsuko was stumped. She was on the phone with Gendo Ikari, her lover. "I'm sorry but I have no explanation. Somehow, your son has undergone... changes."

"Will this affect his standing as a pilot?" Gendo cut straight to the point, not concern with his child's welfare.

"The changes seem focus only on the body and I see no negative effects to the mind so-"

"Yes or no, doctor. Can he still pilot?"

"..." Ritsuko stared at the phone. "Yes. Yes, I believe he can still pilot the Eva."

"Good. Inform me if there is a significant change in his synchronization. Anything else... tell Capt. Katsuragi." click

Ritsuko stared at the receiver and sighed. That was the man she wanted to marry. She sighed and hung the phone just as Misato entered into her office.

"Morning, Rits!" Misato waved cheerfully. "How did Shinji's checkup go? Think I'll need to dress in my nurse outfit again?"

Ritsuko tsk. "God, Misato, I always knew you were a pedophile."

Misato shrugged nonchalantly. "Just a joke. But seriously, how is he?"

Ritsuko held up two photos and passed one to Misato. "Take a look. This is from two weeks ago, just after Shinji beat the Third Angel."

"Yeah, it's him alright. Same skinny body and built like a twig." She grinned. "But can I ask why you keep bare-chested photos of Shinji in your office?"

"Wha-at? What the hell does that mean?"

"I'm just wondering which of us is the pedophile. I mean, really Rits! When was the last time you went out on a date? Every Friday, you speed the night at home with all those cats like a crazy old bag."

"Young people have cats!"

Misato rolled her eyes. "Sure they do, Rits. Sure they do."

Ritsuko smacked her desk. "Where the hell do you get off calling me a-" Ritsuko wanted to smack herself for letting her friend get to her. "Really Misato, grow up."

"And stop messing with your head? Never."

"Look! Let's just get to the point!" Ritsuko handed Misato the second photo. "Here's a picture of the Third Child taken this morning. Notice anything different?"

Misato looked at the photo and gasped. Shinji was so... muscular! He was scrawny no more. He lacked enough muscles to make him a body builder. Instead he had a form more in keeping with an acrobat: Muscular without enough bulk to slow him down and every muscle being a steel spring, ready to lash out.

Misato's jaw hung loose for a moment. "How?"

"Don't know. At first, I thought it was just steroids but his psych profile says he's not the type. Also a blood test proved he's clean, no steroids or drugs of any kind."

"Wow. Ah-Ah-I notice... Shinji practicing some katas for the last few days but... but this isn't... I mean, he couldn't-"

"Doesn't seem possible, does it?" Ritsuko shook her head. "At first I thought it was due to his synchronization with Eva but we don't see Rei with D-cups, do we?"

Misato continued to stare at the photograph. Shinji looked... rather handsome. "Du-Du-Do you have any idea how this happen?"

"Heh. If I did, I would quit my job here and live off the royalties selling it too every fat slob alive. My summer home would be in Vienna where countless Mr. Universe wannabes would strip dance whenever I snapped my fingers."

Misato woke out of her stupor and rolled her eyes. "And you say I need to grow up. So where's the patient now? Is he okay?"

"He's fine. Right now he's in a hospital room waiting for me to tell him the results of this checkup. I can't wait to hear what his explanation for this is."

knock-knock

Ritsuko looked away from her friend to her door. "Come in!"

Both ladies were surprised to see Senator Palpatine enter the office. The aging gentleman bowed. "Hello ladies. Nice to see you two."

Ritsuko smiled. Working for SEELE, it was nice meeting a politician that was as honest as Gendo was cold-hearted. "Good to see you too, Senator. May I ask why you've stopped by? Do you need an... examination?" she puckered up for a mock kiss.

"I'm afraid not, Dr. Akagi. I'm here to discuss a bill issuing extra funding for NERV with Commander Ikari."

Misato blinked. "A politician wanting to give NERV more money? Forgive me Senator Palpatine, but I don't often see a government official acting on behalf of safeguarding humanity."

"We're a dying breed." Palpatine sighed sadly. "I have known so many good men who have become more interested with their checking account than their vow to serve the public good. Truthfully, I have a secondary reason for coming here. I heard that young Shinji is here and I wish to make sure he's heading down the right path."

Ritsuko cocked an eyebrow. "You're afraid he'll be 'corrupt'?"

"I just don't want him to become like his father."

Ritsuko huffed. "Now see here Palpatine, you shouldn't judge Gendo like that! He has the most important job in the world! That's a responsibility that a little senator could never understand!"

"Ritsuko!" Misato was shocked at her friend's disrespect.

Palpatine looked the doctor dead in the eye. "Dr. Akagi, I know what really goes through Gendo's mind and it frightens me. Is it too much to ask that I wish Shinji to be a better man?"

"Of course not!" Misato shouted. She stood by Palpatine. "Listen Rits, I've been watching over Shinji and I think he needs the kind of guidance Senator Palpatine can give. Tell me Senator, have you any suggestions for Shinji?"

"I do indeed, Captain Katsuragi. I notice Shinji seems rather restless lately. Perhaps a hobby would be in order?"

Misato mused over the idea. "That's not too bad. He does play the cello but he it would be nice if he picked up another hobby. Maybe karate would suit him. It definitely would help with his self confidence."

Palpatine shook his head. "Actually Misato, I was thinking more along the lines of swordsmanship. It would teach him grace and patience, wonderful traits for a healthy young boy to pick up."

Misato pondered this. "Hmm... some kendo lessons could help the kid get out more. Everyday, he spends all his time locked in his room meditating."

"No, Misato. I think Kendo is too rigid. Shinji needs to learn something that is more loose."

"Uhh... how about English fencing than? It's pretty graceful."

"No no no, Misato. That would not do at all. Tell me, what do you know about sabers?"

blink-blink "Uh, nothing."

Ritsuko rolled her eyes. "You're an idiot."

Palpatine waggled a finger. "Now, now Dr. Akagi. Don't be so quick to so label your good friend. I can recommend a wonderful teacher who would gladly instruct Shinji. What do you say?"

Misato beamed him a smile. "I think that would be perfect. I can't wait to tell him."

Ritsuko reached for the intercom. "I'll buzz him in here so you can inform him of the news."

"Thank you, sir!" Shinji beamed upon hearing the good news. "I promise you that I'll put these lessons to good use."

Palpatine shared a smile with Ritsuko and Misato. "Thank nothing of it, young man. If you turn out to be a better person because of this, nothing would make me more happier."

"I-I gotta do something for you!" Shinji stammered. "Please let me make it up to you. I owe you too much not to."

"Weeell," Palpatine mused. "There is something you could do."

"Anything!" Shinji begged.

"Very well then, Shinji Ikari," the Senator spoke in his most arthritic voice. "You must fetch me... a shrubbery!"

Shinji blinked. "A shrubbery?"

"Yes, a shrubbery. On the east side of Tokyo 3, there is a store, 'Ivy's Greenhouse', on the corner of 38th and G. Street that is holding a special order for me. I would send one of my aids to pick it up but I have them all doing different tasks. If you pick it up, I would more than be willing to call it even."

Shinji knew there had to be a catch somewhere. "Weeell, I think I could."

Misato took a step forward. "Of course he could. C'mon Shinji, I'm off duty now and I can give you a ride there."

Palpatine waved his hand. "You can't take Shinji to the store. You still have business to do. He will have to walk."

Misato nodded. "I can't take you to the store. I still have business to do. You will have to walk." Misato immediately walked away.

Ritsuko saw this and immediately walked away at a hurried pace. She could really use a stiff drink right now.

And so Shinji was left alone with Senator Palpatine. The Senator gave Shinji a simple pat on the back. "Good luck, Shinji. Oh, and by the way? I think you should leave right now. The shop closes in an hour and I would consider it an inconvenience if I had to wait another day."

"I understand. I'll get you a shrubbery."

"Make it a nice one."

Shinji sighed. "It'll be a nice one."

"And not too expensive." Palpatine turned and walked away.

Deep down, Shinji had a feeling this was the whole Chicken Soup incident all over again.

An hour later, Shinji was in a sector of the city he had never been in before. It was in the lower class section of Tokyo 3 where street gangs held more power than the police. An accurate term would be the slums.

Shinji took a breath and extended his self into the Force, expanding his senses. There was much corruption in the place, much fear. The dwellers here were constantly scared. Scared of hunger; scared of the gangs. They were so scared that nearly everyone stayed indoors. There were next to no one on the streets.

Shinji wondered how the government allowed this to happen. Hunger could be ended with labor factories, employing the uneducated. Their jobs would earn them the money for food. An increase vigilant of the neighborhoods and more law enforcers would finish the threats of gangs. Shinji recalled something his master said to him once.

'Control is the key to order. The great the control, the stronger the order.'

Shinji felt an aura approach from behind. Shinji scanned him harder and found him to be very weak. Definitely not a threat.

"Hey!" yelled a gruff and sluggish voice. "Why you here, boy? Tell me."

Shinji turned around and saw a slovenly and fat cop with grey highlights. "Is there a problem, officer?"

The overweight cop wheezed. "Just get out of here, boy. Run home to your mommy. It's not safe here."

"It's not safe anywhere if I have to rely on cops like you for protection," Shinji quipped. The dark side made him fully aware of how foolish it was to ever respect fat slobs like the police.

The cop growled which made him look more foolish than dangerous. "Very funny, punk."

It angered Shinji that the cop 'demoted' him in name by calling him a lowly punk. He was a Sith, not some lowly hood.

The cop continued. "Listen. Our intel says there's going to be a big gang war between four factions today. We think it's going to be today."

Shinji nodded. "I see. So you're evacuating the streets to protect people. Wise choice. We don't want innocents to get hurt."

"That's what we hope. Hopefully they'll kill each other without shooting anyone else."

"Kill each other? You mean you're not going to stop them? You're just let them duck it out in the streets?"

"Yeah. Let 'em wipe each other out, I say. Saves us the trouble."

Shinji clinched his fists. "What about innocents?" he snapped. "Without someone monitoring the situation, there's bound to be innocents lost with ricochet bullets!"

"Heh," he was amused with the child's naivety. "What would you tell us to do? Just go in and arrest them all? Too many cops would be killed. Ain't worth it."

"Coward!" Shinji countered. "If it's too dangerous for you to arrest them, than just kill them!"

The cop smiled sadly. "That's a violation of civil rights kid. We don't have the authority to kill gangs just because they're gangs. We got to catch them doing a crime. That's the law."

"It's a STUPID law! As long as a threat to innocents exists, you should have the right to kill them! They're nothing but vermin; they don't deserve to live!"

"Where'd you learn that from? Hitler Youth Camp?"

Shinji had to bit back his anger. It was so tempting to kill him but that would upset his mission. But the idea of using the Force Chokehold almost made it seem worth it. "Can I go now? I got a shrubbery to pick up."

"A shrubbery?" the cop cocked an eye. "You're willing to get in the middle of a gang war, where hundreds of bullets will wiz through their air, just for a shrubbery?"

"It's not just a shrubbery. It's a nice shrubbery and a not too expensive one." Shinji walked away.

The cop watched Shinji as he headed deeper into the slums. "Dead man walking."

His radio beeped. churrr "Master Chief? Master Chief?" churr "Come in, Master Chief." churr

"Master Chief here. What's the situation?"

"The Jackals are approaching from Hiroshi Street. The Hunters have set up a barricade at the shopping center. The Elites are coming in from 9th and the Grunts are coming from East Street."

Master Chief grimace at that information. Ever since the near eradication of the Skulls a week ago, all the other gang factions have been at it full force.

The Grunts: Hispanic crooks who somehow got to Japan. Despite their tiny size, they fought like vicious pitbulls. They were about as smart as dogs too; but what they lacked in intelligence, they made up with sheer tenacity. Often, they would hurl themselves at other hoods and dog pile them. Despite their imp size, sniveling nature, and comical actions, they were a force to be reckoned with.

The Jackals: Arab black marketers. With their lack of raw strength, a fool would deem them weak. Those fools always ended up dead. They always strike from the shadows, leaving behind butchered corpses as their namesake would. Fire fights were difficult because these bloodthirsty fiends would always wear bulletproof kevlar clothing head to foot, serving as a shield from all assaults.

The Elites: Italian mobsters. They always worked in teams and were easily the most organized. They always planned out crimes with perfect detail. That did not mean they could not handle a chaotic situation. They always came prepared with grenades and weapons ranging from the standard to the exotic, military ordinance. Using all their weapons and skills, they could kill dozens and vanished from the scene in seconds.

The Hunters: Russian mobsters. They were the bane of the police. All were over seven feet tall, agile, durable, sharp shooters, and formidable soldiers, these tall behemoths could kill anyone if they were given a chance no matter under what conditions. They fought with the determination of the Grunts, wore the protective suits of the Jackals, and could kill more efficiently than the Elites.

This did not change that all these criminals would try to coven as much turf as they could. It would be a covenant war.

Knowledge flooded Shinji's mind as he let invisible Force waves washed over the city sector. Anger. Hate. Greed. Kill. Gangs. As the officer said, a war was about to happen. Calling upon the silent stealth techniques taught to him by the master, Shinji practically rendered himself invisible in broad daylight. He slid between cars, creeping behind posts, never being spotted. He was hiding behind a van that was just in front of the store that held his prize. He peaked over the roof.

Ivy's Greenhouse was across the street. It was still open even though the owner had left. Outside the four gangs were approaching with weapons drawn. Shinji had to weigh his decisions carefully. If he acted now, death was possible but if he acted after they killed each other, then the shop could be ruined as well as the shrubbery.

Shinji had no choice.

Just as the gangs aimed at each other, they heard a loud thump. They all turned to see a foaming Shinji standing on top of the van.

"Alright maggots! Give me the shrubbery and nobody gets hurt!"

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Two hours later...

Misato was shaking the senator's hand. "Congratulations sir!"

"Oh, it's nothing. I'm just glad I could help."

"So the bill will be passed? We'll get more funding?"

"Of course you will," Palpatine smiled confidently. "I had to call in a few favors but it'll be worth it. NERV is in charge of protecting our world isn't it?"

Misato was about to respond when the door opened. They saw a very haggard Shinji walk in carrying a potted plant. The Third Child looked exhausted. His skin was pale; the eyes bloodshot. His uniform was ripped and scratched. His right arm was bandaged heavily. He looked like hell.

"Here's your shrubbery, sir." He held up the pot with trembling blood splattered hands.

"Shinji!" Misato gasped. "What happened to you?!"

"Eh-I," he stammered. "I... bought the shrubbery but... I got caught in a shoot out between... some gangs. Don't worry, ah-I'm...okay."

"Your arm is injured," Palpatine observed.

"A stray shot." Shinji answered. "I'm pretty lucky actually. I heard on the bus radio on my ride back a lot of gang bangers didn't make it. It's no big deal what I went through."

"You will need a tetanus shot, friend. Plus some stitches as well from the looks of it." Palpatine looked at the captain who was looking quite frantic. "Misato? Please escort Shinji to the med-wing."

Misato nodded wordlessly. She gently grabbed Shinji by his good arm and was about to lead him away when Palpatine stopped her.

"One minute, captain." He made eye-contact with Shinji. "Shinji, I am glad you brought me my shrubbery just as I'm glad you ran when you had the option but there is something else I need."

Shinji had a queasy feeling. "What's that, sir?"

"You must fetch me... ANOTHER SHRUBBERY!"

Shinji nearly wept. "Oh god, it is the chicken soup incident all over again!"

Shinji would have protested further but Misato dragged him away before he could. Palpatine gave himself a proud smile and left as well, never bothering to pay attention to the radio that Misato had left on in the room.

...we interrupt this countdown to bring you an important message. There has been a massive gang shooting on the east side of the city. There have been over sixty casualties, strangely enough all from the gangs. Police are unwilling to comment at this time..."

End chapter three...

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Like it? Honestly, I didn't. It's getting too funny. I need to get back to the dark side. Also I've finally figured out how to write this Shinji. Instead of being a plan ol' evil dude, I'll write him as a Darth Vader type dude, a sociopathic civil servant. Personally, I'm really looking forward to writing some more of this now that summer is here.

ps... HALO RULES!